AN: Happy November 1st! Here is another update. Wonders will never cease. Imagine if we could go three for three!

Also Happy Birthday to Maddie Troia who requested this for her 26th b'day in a review a few days ago! Better late than never I hope haha.

Hope it was a good one Maddie.

X


10:11am

The hot tears against her face don't relent. Even now, as miles of cement disappear before her eyes, they continue to streak relentless trails of anguish down her cheeks.

Her jeans are damp where she's been wiping her hands and with no takeout napkins left in the console she's in dire need of a tissue.

She can tell that Elliot is well aware of her predicament, but his focus is on strong arming the steering wheel as they weave through close packed cars in this continuous downpour.

She feels the car slide unexpectedly from the rain followed by a car horn and she grips the side door handle, her heart hammering as the fierce downpour continues to gain momentum.

She catches a row of cars pulled over up ahead with their hazard lights on and she leans forward, attempting to gauge if it's an accident or something more. She can barely see through the thick, white sheets of rain but when they get closer she ascertains it's a line of drivers who have pulled over against the highway divide, deeming the conditions unfit to continue.

She glances over at Elliot in question but the look on his face tells her he isn't going to allow the elements to slow them down. He continues through the white wash and she watches as more and more cars begin to surrender to the conditions as if they were all privy to information that they weren't.

Her gut churns, her mind oscillating between succumbing to another unscheduled delay and maintaining their personal safety but even she is aware, the last thing they need is another opportunity into forced stillness.

She is still recovering from those eyes, his face, those firm lines that bracketed his mouth as he waited on edge to see if she was going to vomit out the four day ordeal she's spent countless nights suppressing - as if giving him those brutal details was going to make any of this easier on either of them.

You're gonna cry his name out at some point. They always do.

She feels another stubborn tear trickle down her cheek and she subtly swipes it away, praying to any God who will listen to ease up on this storm so they can just get home, then it's a timely crack of thunder from above that makes her jump in her seat.

"I'll take the next exit," he tells her, his voice low and chock full of frustration and she shakes her head at the irony that not even fate wants to see this end for them just yet.

She is dreading the silence.

Elliot wants to hear her story.

But she is broken from telling it.

She's already had to recount it many times to police - Lindstrom - Cassidy.

Brian got the abridged version - the sugar coated, need to know details - the ones she could no longer side step when the horrors had startled them both awake.

She couldn't bear to watch the light in Elliot's eyes dissipate too.

She feels another heavy thread of guilt weave through her chest at the thought of Brian at home in her apartment, this whole time waiting.. worried.. out of his mind.

Again.

She runs her trembling hands across her thighs, trying to quench the guilt, attempting to shelve it somewhere in the depths of her chest, so it can lay dormant for just a few more hours. She isn't a bad person - she was forced to make a choice, but she knows her choices resulted in letting many people she cared about down.

Cragen, Nick, Amanda, Fin..

They're all waiting.. sick out of their mind.

Extenuating circumstances, she tells herself.

She hears a series of car horns blaring from all directions now and she pinches the bridge of her nose, swallowing back the congestion in her throat as her heavy breaths rival the whirring of the wiper blades.

She was complicit with Elliot, that's the term that's resounding in her mind, and she knows it will take a lot of work to unravel herself from the reality of that.

Just a little longer now, she thinks, just a few more hours until they get to the city, but even she can't fool herself with her naivety, because this will never be over for them, and that's the hardest part to reconcile.

They both part ways .. and then what?

She whispers a quiet plea for this all to stop and the indicator is on within seconds, the car suddenly veering into the furthest lane. Her skin is both raw and clammy, her throat emitting a scratchy, shuddery sound each time she takes a breath now.

She needs air.

Maybe this is anxiety.

Maybe this is surrender.

She can tell he is monitoring her out of the corner of his eye and as she lifts her head, she catches the reprieve of the exit sign above them as if her salvation had always been fated.

Even if their future was not.


12:04pm

He returns to the car with a travel-sized box of tissues, two bottles of water and a small object in his hand that she can't quite make out. He passes her the tissues before shaking off his drenched hoodie and tossing it into the back seat, his elbow swiping her arm in the process.

She tears open the top of the box, tugging out a few kleenex, wiping her hands first and then blowing her nose loudly.

"Do you need to use the restroom?" he asks mid blow, careful not to look at her directly. "Camera's front facing, you can go around back. It's open, you don't need a key."

She hadn't left the car as a precaution of being recognized and she knows she should probably take the opportunity now that they've stopped, but she doesn't need to.

Perhaps it was the onslaught of emotion she had unleashed that had dried up every square inch of liquid in her body.

She shakes her head noin response and watches as he stacks the two bottles in the console before handing her the small object in his hand.

She hesitates for a brief moment, still blotting the tissue beneath her nose when she registers the pair of women's tortoiseshell sunglasses.

She stills in place and doesn't take them at first, instead she moves downward, reaching for the empty take out bag beneath her feet so she can stuff in the soiled tissues.

"It's raining Elliot." Her horse voice highlights the redundancy of his purchase before she moves back up and takes them from his hand regardless.

The sentiment was not lost on her.

This was a peace offering, and she was taking it.

She slips them on, sheeting her eyes in welcome darkness, feeling instant relief at her muted surroundings. She is thankful for the ability to cover her bloodshot eyes and discoloured skin and she wonders in that moment if that was the real reason he had bought them for her.

Not for the sun.

But for her privacy.

"You want something to eat?" he asks, his voice even. "We still have snacks in the back, or I could get you something decent from inside?"

She can tell he is treading carefully with her.

"I'm okay."

A gust of wind flicks through the window suddenly, rustling the article in the console and she starts to wind up the small crack she had left open, unknowingly trapping them into silence once more.

The storm had been furious earlier, but the rain was now easing up.

He is quiet beside her now and he isn't making any motions to start the engine so she uses the newfound discretion of her shades to take in his grey, partly soaked t-shirt, his tense jawline and his cheeks still wet and flushed from the rain.

He looks tired, exhausted.

He is staring ahead with an aura of concern but his features are softening slightly as if he has something to tell her now and it was important.

She waits a few beats until his eye line drops down to the article, the one that has now bridged a thousand questions between them and she watches him finger it slowly.

She stays still - motionless, wishing in that moment she had enough strength to pick it up and tear it into confetti sized pieces.

"Liv I…"

His words trail off and she watches him struggle to articulate what seems like a multitude of half sentences in his mind.

He doesn't land on a single one and she isn't sure if it's the newfound confidence beneath the shades but she decides in that moment to take the reins.

"You know there was a point last night Elliot," she begins slowly, her tone tapered, her heart heavy, her mind racing at the thought of admitting this to him right now. "Where all I wanted was to get in this car with you.." she whispers shakily. "And drive away."

He looks over at her, surprise lining his features, their eyes locking intently beneath her shades.

He hadn't expected that.

Nor had she.

She watches her honesty shock him into stillness and he isn't responding because he wants her to continue, as if this could be the very moment she cracks in half and spills everything - her break, her inevitable fall, but this is all she has for him.

Just this one sentiment.

A fleeting moment.

She wanted to leave her life.

For him.

A long wave of silence passes between them and when it's clear he isn't going to respond to her admission she shakes her head sadly.

"I don't know.. " her voice drops an octave or two, bearing the trapped emotion in her throat for all to hear. "Maybe in another life."

He is still staring at her, almost ghost like now, as if her admission had eclipsed the ones that had been circling his mind.

Maybe in another life, she would have stayed.

Maybe in another life..they'll meet again.

Perfect World.

"We should get going Elliot." She sucks in her breath, suddenly realizing her surroundings as if for a second she had forgotten where they were.

She gives him a look that lacks faith yet somehow holds hope, as if they'd just struck out on a final poker game but there was always next time.

Their next life.

He still looks fraught with sadness but she doesn't let it linger, she turns decidedly forward and stares ahead, down the road to her future - of what, she doesn't know.

He begins to turn the engine over slowly, the car beneath them roaring into life and it's an unspoken agreement when they pull out of the gas station.

A few more hours, and she will be home.

TBC