AN: I can't say I'm liking the no reviews for the last chapter, perhaps no one realized I'd updated. I did get one I guess. Thank you, jumpy, was it?

Chapter 6

After Louis left, Ren and I didn't resume our…play. Rather we watched a couple movies before going to bed, we talked awhile-- her slipping a 'don't go with him' in as often as she could. But I eventually made it very clear that there were only two ways I wouldn't go with him: 1) if he got another date-- which we both knew was unlikely since he apparently intended to win me back, and 2) If Ren took me instead.

Either way, all these events led me to postpone telling my parents. They also postponed yet another argument about Ren coming out, as I decided not to bring it up Sunday. She was stressed as is with the prospect of Louis's hands on me. I can't say that, as guilty as I feel for it, I wasn't a little thrilled at Ren's jealousy. I don't know what it is because I always say that jealousy isn't a good trait, or it's not something you look for in a lover… but for some reason, in this particular circumstance, I liked being the source of it. The feeling of being wanted, I guess, is what it comes down to.

I didn't know it then, but she had in fact told Ruby about us by that time. In fact, as she'd later explain to me, she went straight to Ruby's house on Sunday when she left. Here it is, as she told it to me:

"I went to Ruby's after I left on Sunday because, well I didn't want you to go to the dance with Louis and Ruby's good at dealing with those sorts of situations. It was weird and took me awhile to get it out but I told her about me. It probably took half an hour, I was stammering like mad… and… well, when I'd first got there she immediately showed me a list of boys she'd compiled-- all perfect dates for me to go to Formal with, and I said: Ruby, there's sort of a reason I haven't dated anyone in awhile. And she said, 'You and Jason broke up years ago, Ren. You've got to be over it by now.' And I said: That's not it.' 'Well, what then?' 'It's just…this thing…I'm not…completely…I mean, I'm just not…interested…in them…those guys…guys…in general…actually' And she was totally cool with it, but she said I should hold off on telling Monique because she'd surely be less than ok with it. And then she said, 'Give me a day and I can find some girls for you, I'm sure I could' to which I replied, 'No thanks, most people don't know yet' 'Most people?' 'Well, you know Amy Johnson and her group-- all those gay-straight alliance kids, or the gay part of the alliance…they all know…and, someone else…I'm sort of involved with…' 'Oh my God! Who?' I didn't know what she'd think of me going with my brother's ex-girlfriend, and then coming to her with advice on how to keep them apart-- I look like the villain when you take the story at face-value, you know. 'Um, well…Tawny… Tawny Dean' 'Louis's Tawny!' That made me mad, her calling you that. 'Yes' 'Does he know?' 'No…and that's why I'm here, actually…and then I told her all of what happened and you agreeing to go to the dance with him…I needed help, I wanted advice… But I told her not to tell you that I knew, because I knew you'd try to get me to tell my parents if you knew I'd told her. And I wasn't ready for that. No matter how ready you were, or thought I was…"

Anyway, little over a week later, on a Tuesday, with the dance just days away, I finally brought it up again. Ren had been going out of her way to spend time with me, unbeknownst to anyone else of course and I couldn't help but thinking that same old nagging thought-- if she really wanted me, why wasn't she out of the closet yet? The more I thought about it, the more I understood why it would bother someone so much for their significant other to, in effect, date their sibling. And I realized that if I had a brother, I wouldn't want Ren dating him. I would do anything to prevent it, no matter how confident I may be about the relationship. But Ren would do only almost anything. And so it became a thing of spite, and I told her that at one point. I said: "I get it, you don't want me with him. He's your brother, it'd be weird, awkward, whatever… I completely agree and if the tables were turned I'd do anything to keep you from dating my brother if I had one. But you won't. You're just hoping I won't do it, but you're not really going to fight for me. You know, maybe I will say yes when he asks me out, too."

And the more I thought about it, the more I intended to do just that.