Title:
Hard to Love
You
Author: Jen / weisy / privateradios
Disclaimer:
Not mine.
Rating: FRT – language and sexual stuff.
Pairing: Flack/Aiden
Summary: "'Cause now I
feel a bridge is burning and all the smoke is in my eyes."
Word
Count: 1,682
Spoilers: Set after Grand Murder in
Central Station
A/N: Don't read if you hate horrible
endings! Gasp! AND DON'T KILL ME, PLEASE. SCC IS NEXT, it is. Sigh.
It's just I've been having such a hard time with it that writing
these small things help.
"Baby, stop it." She pleads, eyes brewing with fresh tears as she watches him throw open the closet doors, the sound echoing off the walls surrounding them. "Don, please, listen to me."
He doesn't listen but instead he grabs his suitcase, which is buried deep beneath in the closet, before throwing it onto their bed with such power that it bounces slightly against the mattress. He doesn't even acknowledge her as he turns back towards the closet and begins grabbing shirts from the hangers, throwing them hastily into the open suitcase.
She blinks back the tears, fingers curling into tight fists as she takes a small step towards him. "Don, stop and listen to me!"
His pants fall on top of his shirts and Aiden, without thinking through, marches over to the open suitcase and grabs it before turning and throwing it, with all power she has, towards the wall, watching as it hits with such a force that all his clothes scatter about the room, falling like rain towards the ground.
He's in shock, eyes widening at her as she slowly turns around to face him, tight fists threatening to rise in such a fury that it will send him flying into the next week.
Slowly, she speaks and when she does, Don feels the anger boil deep inside. "You. Will. Fucking. Listen. To. Me."
Somehow or another, it sets him off and he begins to yell at her, red flashing right before his eyes. "You tampered with evidence, Aid. There's nothing to hear from you! I'm not havin' a girlfriend who fuckin' messes with evidence." He pushes past her towards his broken suitcase as he quickly begins to put the clothes back in, not bothering to even fold them – something that Aiden notices immediately. "You're such an idiot, Aiden." He slams the suitcase shut and zips it so hard that Aiden swears he's ripped the zipper off.
"I'm not an idiot, Don." Is her only rebuttal as he laughs, shaking his head at her before setting the suitcase back on their bed. "And you know the reason why I did that?" She asks, voice rising. "I wanted to save her, Don. I wanted to help and get this guy because he keeps fuckin' around with our minds. He doesn't stop and I was gonna go through with it, really, I was, but I didn't and fuck, Don…don't do this."
Don't leave.
"I have to, Aiden."
The tears, hidden behind her brown eyes, try to break free but she fights back, swallowing hard as she shakes her head at him. "Don…"
I love you.
His fingers curl around the handle of the suitcase and he lifts it before turning and walking out from the bedroom, not bothering at all to even steal a glance at her.
Aiden feels her body go numb as she runs out after him, the tears no longer concealed but instead found by sliding down her cheeks. She reaches out and grabs his forearm, turning him around to face her.
His eyes are soft and empty and she knows he has enough strength to push her away and go but he doesn't move. Don stands there; suitcase in one hand as silence greets them both, filling the empty air with itself as she stares at him as he looks at his feet.
She reaches up slowly to graze her fingertips across his cheek, leaving a small trail of herself with him. "I'm so sorry." She whispers, the tears flowing faster than she had ever imagined as she slowly releases her grip on his forearm. "I'm so sorry. I never meant to destroy anythin' between us."
I love you. I've fuckin' loved you since the moment you took the bullet from me that one dark November day. I was standin' there, gun drawn at the suspect, but he was faster. He charged at me, do you remember? He had a knife and he crashed into me, my gun flying off and clattering somewhere in the distance as he jumped on top of me. He got me with the knife in the arm before reaching over and grabbing my gun that had fallen from my hand. Remember how I managed to get up, stumblin' to my feet as blood poured from the wound on my arm?
And then there you were. You ran in just as he was 'bout to pull the trigger and I swear Don, I've never seen a man run so fast before. And when the gun fired, I just kept thinkin' to myself that I was gonna die but when it was over, I was fine but you weren't. There was so much blood. It wouldn't stop bleedin' from your chest and that's when Mac and Stella arrived, quickly catchin' the guy.
Then I was besides you, tellin' you that you'd make it. And I brushed away the strands of dark hair from your face, remember? And at that moment, Don, I couldn't help but watch as I fell in love with you.
Do you remember that?
He slowly looks up at him and her breath catches in her throat at the sight of his face. His eyes are red and there is a trail of tears falling from his eyes, showing his weakness and pain to her out in the open.
Suddenly, she hears the sound of his suitcase falling to the ground before he reaches out and places his hands on her face, pulling her close to him, lips meeting hers. The kiss does not begin sweetly or gently but instead turns deadly, teeth biting at lips, the taste of metallic on tongues as his body pushes against hers. He moves his hands away from her face to grab her shoulders as he pulls away and suddenly turns her sharply, slamming her hard up against a wall.
The pain rips through her body as he raises her wrists and holds them with his hands above her head, continuing to kiss her dangerously, pressing his hips up against hers as she moans into his mouth.
Come tomorrow, she knows that his fingers will leave bruises on her wrists, traces of this evening but she pushes that thought to the back of her mind. There will be a time and place for that later.
He moves his mouth away from hers as he bites at her neck, tongue and whispers tracing across her skin as she moves against him, body aching for more.
The city roars to life underneath them, reminding them of its existence. Don releases his grip on her wrists and he immediately reaches for her blouse, pulling at the shirt as the buttons fall to the ground, clattering on the hard wood floor.
This is all wrong and Aiden takes this moment to look at his eyes and they're staring right back; filled with emptiness and rage. This was not Don and Aiden fears to move on any further as he takes her body and slams her against the wall for the second time.
"Don, stop!" She yells as he reaches up and does something Aiden has never ever seen him do before – he slaps her.
The burning on her cheek causes her to quickly fight back, a punch to his face as he stumbles backwards, blood falling from his torn lips as she breathes heavily. "What are you fuckin' doin'? This isn't you!"
He's touching the blood on his lips with his index finger, mumbling soft words on his lips as Aiden watches him a couple feet away. He's at his breaking point, he's hit rock bottom, and Aiden closes her eyes before reopening them, watching as he looks around before falling onto the couch, head in his hands.
Cautiously, she moves around the couch and sits down next to him, her voice lowering as she gently reaches out to rest her hand on his shoulder, fingers gently massaging. "We're gonna need a long talk about this. Maybe tomorrow or somethin'? Let us clear our heads and then figure out what we want to do 'bout ourselves tomorrow?"
He's silent for a moment, deep in concentration before sighing, muscles relaxing underneath her touch. "I want you, Aid. I love you and I want you all to myself but I can't. I can't because of who I am and where I'm from. My pop won't accept you anymore and I can't live with that."
She feels the anger run through her veins. "I don't care what your pop thinks of me."
"I have to, Aiden. He's my blood."
But I take better care of you! I'm there for you! I'm the one that holds you, I'm the one that loves you, I'm the one that takes care of you and makes sure that you're world isn't falling to pieces in front of your eyes.
It's me, Don! It's not your family but me!
She swallows hard, fingers tightening around his shoulder. "I'm never gonna stop lovin' you if you leave me."
He bites at his lip and she hangs her head.
Never gonna stop lovin' you. Not until the day I die.
Don slowly raises his head and stares ahead at the picture in the picture frame in front of him. It's the picture of the night that he and Aiden on the small boat sailing on the Hudson River. Her arms are wrapped around his waist as he pressed a kiss to the top of her head.
He knows what he needs to do; he needs to let them both go. The relationship that they possess will slowly fall apart over time due to the persistent and harsh words of his father echoing in his head.
Without looking at her, he speaks and when he does, he says it so dryly that it makes the world suddenly shift below their feet, "I'll help pack your bags."
FIN.
