XIII. I've Decided

"I'll come back with you, but until you understand your feelings I am not going to give you my body."

Erik nodded then said, "Fine."

xxxx

Erik had thought on the whole incident that had happened ever since yesterday. What was his feelings? Could he ever love again? It was silly to think she could love him after all the things he had put her through. Yet she had come for him when Christine had not. Why? He turned on his side, watching her sleep soundly on the bed.

Who could love a rapist? She had even said as long as he loved her that she would forgive him. But after what he had done, he doubted seriously that she would forgive him for anything. How was he to understand his feelings? At first he thought that he despised her for coming to see him. But now it was different. She made him realize how lonely he truly was.

'Apologize.' He thought. But it would take more than a mere apology. Besides, what did he actually want with her? No doubt she would want to marry or have children. Could he actually love again? Maybe. Once he found out her true motives he could decide if all he wanted is a strictly physical relationship or something else.

"What is the matter?" Her voice stirred him from his thoughts.

"I am thinking. Go back to sleep."

"Erik?"

"Didn't you hear me?"

"Yes."

"Then. What are you giggling about?"

"I'm sorry." Zuri apologized between giggles. "It's silly."

"What's silly?"

"I was wondering if I could comb your hair."

"Why?"

"Do you always have to question everything?"

"Yes."

She sighed. "Let things be for once. Enjoy life. Don't question it."

"That still doesn't answer my question."

Picking up a comb, she sat on her knees then bent over and began to comb his dark hair back away from his face. "Because I have never combed a man's hair."

"Is that all?"

"Do you have to take everything so seriously?" She asked while sighing.

"Zuri. About our situation."

"Yes."

"I need to understand your motives."

"What do you mean Erik?"

"What kind of relationship do you wish to have?"

"I don't know. I know I want someone who loves me for more than my body. Someone who will not make me have children for the sole reason of an heir."

Erik nodded his agreement. "I certainly wouldn't force you into it."

"What am I to you?"

"A woman."

Zuri sighed angrily. "Besides that."

"I don't know."

"Erik. You have never been unsure till now. Please tell me what I would be to you if you were to have me."

Pulling her against his chest he said, "I can't stand your damned questions.

Save it till later!" He pressed his lips against hers. He pushed his tongue into her mouth forcefully, his tongue exploring her mouth. Suddenly, he pulled away leaving her breathless. He suddenly pressed her to the bed and sat between her bent, parted legs.

"No."

"What?" Erik asked. He was confused.

"I can't Erik. Not until I feel that you love me or care for me. Which you don't."

"That isn't true!"

"Tell me then. Be a man!"

"Would you shun me?"

Zuri tilted her head in curiosity. She had never seen this side of Erik before. "I've been searching for you for two years! Does it look like I would shun you? Erik. There are many types of love but unconditional love; I feel is the most important of all."

"What do you mean?"

"Unconditional love means..."

"I know what it means." Erik interrupted her.

"No need to be rude. I mean that it's important because the person you choose to live your life with should love you no matter what you look like, what your past is like, or anything else."

He was silent for a few minutes, too deep in thought to notice her odd looks.

"Erik? Haven't you got it yet?"

"Got what?"

"You don't love with your brain. You love with your heart."

"I'm not an idiot."

"I didn't say you were."

"You are thinking it."

"Why are men so damn confusing?"

He was silent for a few minutes. She turned on her back and groaned softly as she did. "I am going to lay down. I'm tired of explaining." Looking at her he sighed then stood from the bed and left her alone for a while.

Author's Note: Thanks for the reviews! I appreciate it. Hope you enjoy the update!