CHAPTER SIXTEEN
"Kristina, you might want to give us some privacy."
Sonny said to her quietly, never taking his eyes from Alexis'.
"Not
a problem." Kristina grinned a little grin at the two of them before heading
for the stairs..
Alexis stood where she was when she'd come down the stairs, a stunned expression still on her face. He'd heard her...he'd heard every word she'd said… For a long moment she couldn't move. Then instinct took over… without thinking, she headed towards the safety of her desk.
Before she could take more than two steps, Sonny's hand was on her arm, turning her around. Instinct took over again; and as the best defense was a good offense, Alexis led with that. "What do you want…why are you here, Sonny?"
She was talking to him at least. Sonny thought with relief he didn't know he'd had inside before now. But it was there…and so were the hard questions Alexis had put to him. Which was so typically her. She wanted honesty – she'd get honesty. "I had to be sure that you were okay."
"I'm fine."
"No you're not."
"And you're so sure of this… because?"
So, the walls were firmly in place. It was going to be a battle to knock them down…he'd never been afraid of a fight before now. Sonny took a deep breath. "Because I hurt you tonight."
Alexis was
silent... astonished was probably more closer to it. He was feeling pretty much
stunned himself. Sonny took a second deep breath and slid his hand down to grab
hers. His next words stunned her even more, for their honesty. "I was thinking
of anyone but myself. But hurting you was the last thing I wanted to do."
"But
you did." Alexis' voice was light almost whispery, as the truth escaped her
lips in spite of herself. "And it's because of her."
"It's not about her…well not really." Sonny fumbled for words. "It's about Courtney and AJ…it's about my family…my sister…and then there's Michael…"
"…and his mother." Alexis finished his sentence. "And that means Carly."
"It's complicated, Alexis."
"We both lead
'complicated' lives Sonny. What else is new?" She gently disentangled her hand
from his. "And I've come to the conclusion that there's always going to be an
"…but Carly."
"You're
wrong." He pulled her to him to show her just how wrong she was. The hand
holding hers snaked around her waist. He smiled slowly at her. "C'mere and let
me prove it to you." Sonny brushed his lips against hers.
Her response surprised him when she didn't respond. "No, Sonny." and when he didn't react quick enough, she repeated it more strongly. "I said, no."
Alexis tamped down her feelings, an old skill she was used to. A survivor technique actually. She'd learned early on when she'd come to live at the Cassidine compound in Greece, not to let her feelings, especially the deeply emotional ones, show. It usually resulted in pain. So Sonny never saw the reaction just he touch could evoke in her. She'd learned to replace her emotions with either ice or anger and it was anger that served her now. "Is that your plan?" she said roughly, pulling away. "Is that how you kept control over Carly? In case you hadn't noticed, I'm not her."
"I know who you
are…and don't you think I know that you are nothing like Carly!"
"No,
I'm not. So you can't browbeat me, you can't kiss me into submission and you
can't send me to my room! You can't control me, Sonny!"
"I'm not trying to control you."
"Aren't you, Mr. Control Freak?"
Sonny was beginning to lose his own temper. "Take a look in the mirror; you should know all about control freaks...you're one yourself! You're trying to control this entire situation. The truth is - you're trying to control how you feel about me…and why? Because you do care…and you can't control that and that scares you!"
Alexis wasn't faking her anger anymore….it was all too real. He'd tried to treat her like…like Carly! Worse yet, she had responded to his touch. From the moment his hand had touched hers, her heart had responded, her pulse had quickened and it had taken everything in her not to respond to the simple touch of his lips against hers. And he was right…she couldn't control her feelings for him… "And Mr. All knowing, all-mighty Corinthos knows it all."
"I know you, Alexis."
"And I know you. You say you and Carly are over, but who was it that came in the garden room tonight and pushed your buttons. More importantly, who allowed it?"
"No matter what I say, you're not going to believe it! Because you're afraid to let go"
"Just like you're afraid to let go of Carly." Alexis fired right back. "I'm not going to let myself get caught in the crossfire."
Was he wrong about Alexis? Had he assumed that he meant so much to her? Suddenly he couldn't read her…He wasn't used to feeling uncertain about anyone, especially a woman. Tantrums he could deal with, mind games, schemes and lies he was used to. But this he wasn't used to a woman he cared about standing toe to toe and telling him about himself. Challenging him to look at himself….Sonny didn't like it...but he didn't know how to defend himself. Alexis had thrown him off balance.
"Fine!" His confusion reverted into anger. "I never thought the day would come that I'd see you behave like such a coward – but if you want to keep lying to yourself and me, don't let me keep you from it!" Frustrated and angry more at himself than Alexis, Sonny slammed out of the apartment.
Of all the pig headed, arrogant…Alexis flung herself after him. He thought he could call her a liar and a coward and just walk away? Well, he was about to find out different… He might be finished, but she was nowhere near finished with him.
Sonny was halfway through his door when Alexis' door crashed open. He spun around. And the two of them stood glaring at each other in the hallway.
Johnny had returned to his post once
Alexis had returned home. That might have been a mistake. He took one look at
the both of them and discretely rang for the elevator. Time for a short ride,
he was thinking. Maybe a long one. Maybe he'd hang around in the lobby with Max
for awhile. Now would be a good time to pay a visit. A very good time. The more
he thought about it, the better it sounded. Luckily for him, neither one of
them appeared to have noticed that he was even present.
Momentarily
– he wasn't. Johnny heaved a heartfelt sigh of relief as the elevator doors
slid shut.
Alexis ignored Johnny. She was too busy entertaining a fantasy of throwing a shoe across the hall. Perhaps it would knock some sense into a certain arrogant somebody.
Sonny Barely registered the bodyguard's presence or his disappearance in the elevator. He was too busy enjoying the thought of shaking some sense into a certain stubborn someone. Then she was yelling at him.
"This is not about me being a
coward or a liar…and for your information…neither of which I am…This is about
your insane need to control everything – your feelings, my feelings…stop trying
to control everything!"
"If you would just admit how you felt!
YOU stop trying to control everything!"
"No that's you!!" they both shouted at the same time.
At this point they're just barely hearing each other, because now they're shouting at the same time. If they weren't both so furious at themselves and one another, they'd be laughing. What was this, their first spat?
"I'm not trying to control you,"
Sonny yelled at her, having lost any patience he had left. Of all the
obstinate, stubborn women he has ever met, how is it that all of a sudden she
has the power to put his feelings all in a jumble??… "I just want to be
with you…"
"So I can be some
poor substitution for the real thing?? No thanks!" He was stubborn, inflexible,
and absolutely the most arrogant alpha-male she'd ever had the misfortune to
meet! Of all the insufferable, egotistical male attitudes that she'd ever
seen in her life…God help her, she must be insane to be attracted to a man like
this…
"There's no one else in my life like you and there never has been! I want to be with you -- because I need you!"
"And I need you too!"
* slam *
The
sound of both doors slamming shut echoed in the suddenly empty hallway.
Time
passed.
And
then a door opened.
