Chapter 15

Sirius watched Hermione. Apprehension jangled his nerve endings. Sidelong glances from James did not help, nor did Lily's raised eyebrows. Could the others be anymore there? He could hear the questions racing through their minds. It was distracting, and it was in his head.

He had to stop. It was similar to being a first year. He grimaced at the images accompanying that thought. The seconds stretched to minutes giving him time to contemplate his thoughts.

The past few days were odd for Sirius. He reverted to some kind of adolescent stage where he didn't know how to talk to girls. He stumbled, and stuttered his words around Hermione.

He earned incredulous looks from James and Remus. Garnered concerned expressions from Harry and Hermione. Smug looks from Lily, who had the temerity to laugh at him.

The strangeness catapulted him into unchartered territory. Sirius Black had not gone through the awkward stages of puberty. He had not suffered the mortifying embarrassment that his classmates had because of the opposite sex. Even now, he did not have problems with the ladies. His charm had just existed. That charm paired with his looks spared him the tortuous situations that plagued most young men. It had been lying in wait, building up through the years deciding to unleash itself in a vicious attack rendering his suave persona useless.

After a particularly bad blunder James confronted him demanding to know what was wrong. Had someone jinxed him? Had he drunk some questionable pumpkin juice? He was told in no uncertain terms to pull it together.

James was right. He was the Sirius Black. No girl affected him this way. He'd be damned if it started now. He cloaked himself within his charm, and wit. He vowed not to make an idiot of himself in front of her.

He whisked the thoughts from his head. His eyes found Lily. Her eyebrows were going to disappear into her hair. She gave him a curious look. He shrugged nonchalantly, and winked. She rolled her eyes. He grinned.

#

Lily shifted. She ignored Sirius. Hermione pried the box open. Lily desperately wanted to know what Sirius had gotten her. They squabbled over her suggestions, which were appropriate, and thoughtful. He disagreed. Words flew between them. A duel was barely prevented by McGonagall. The professor walked down the corridor at the opportune time.

"Oh, Sirius…" Hermione said. She had not expected this. She was prepared for a gag gift, something impersonal. A shooting star charm dangled on a delicate silver chain. It swayed in her grasp. A collective gasp heralded stunned silence.

The simple design was breath taking. Hermione floundered caught in its beauty. It was stunning. She loved it. How could she not, but it was too much for the type of relationship that existed between them. She was about to tell him how she couldn't accept such a gift when the most disarming expression crossed his face. The uncertainty in his eyes spoke volumes. Her mouth curved into a shy yet coy smile in answer.

#

Lily's eyes were dangerously close to popping from their sockets. That necklace was gorgeous. Sirius surprised her. She caught the vulnerability before it disappeared at Hermione's smile. Lily chewed her lip. She was anxious for Sirius. It made no sense. They were not friends. She mostly detested him, but she admired him for the risk he was taking.

#

Harry's brow furrowed in confusion. He stared at the trinket in Hermione's hand. He looked at his godfather, then Hermione. He glanced at George who mirrored his expression. George shrugged.

#

Remus and James shared a look. Neither served as a confidant in this escapade. They were shocked to see their friend display his feelings so openly. They understood the magnitude of the present. Hermione was the only girl to receive jewelry from Sirius Black.

Matching expressions exposed their worry. This situation was developing faster than they realized. Remus considered it a crush, while James felt it to be slightly deeper, but both were surprised at the true depths of Sirius's feelings.

#

"Granger, I didn't know you were the type of girl to be swayed with such trifles, or I would have given you a shiny bauble years ago." George broke the tension.

Hermione stuck her tongue out at him. She was grateful for George's taunt. She hastily put the necklace away. "Just the one left," she said. She forgot to thank Sirius.

The last present would end the celebration. She dispatched the paper, and opened the box. Thread. Puzzled she lifted it. It was an intricately woven string of different colored threads.

"It's a friendship bracelet," Harry said. He placed it around her wrist. He held the ends together. They magically sealed. "I found it in Diagon Alley. The different colors represent a different aspect of our friendship. When it wears down and comes off, you get a wish. The book," he pointed at the box, "explains. And I have one as well." He showed her the thread encircling his wrist. She beamed at him. She threw herself into his arms.

"Thank you, Harry. It means a lot."

"You mean a lot to me," he whispered. They broke apart with matching smiles.

#

Sirius's gut clenched. Harry's gift topped his. He expected it to, but it still made him angry. Hermione liked his present, at least he thought she did. Was he wrong? Blast it all. Why do people put themselves through this nonsense?

He only had to look at Hermione to know the answer. James slapped his back efficiently expelling his maudlin thoughts.

Hermione cleared her throat to get their attention. "This was a wonderful treat, thank you so much, but it is getting late."

James slung his arms onto Remus, and Peter's shoulders. "We've got things to do."

The marauders strutted to the door with well wishes, and happy returns to Hermione. Hermione grabbed Sirius before he left. He focused on the small feminine hand on his arm.

"Sirius," she said breathlessly, "I don't —"

"You're welcome," he blurted. He read her intentions, and forestalled the return of his gift. He smiled. It lit up his entire face.

Hermione's breath hitched. She made the mistake of looking into those blue eyes. They darkened with a foreign emotion. She lost herself in the deepening blue. She was rudely jostled. Her hand slipped as Sirius was pulled out the door.

"Stupid boys," Lily complained. "They ran off without helping clean up."

"Did you expect anything less," Priya said. "Those two stuck around." She indicated Harry, and George. They cleared the mess of wrapping paper.

Lily nodded. "Two gentlemen."

"Two very nice gentlemen," Priya agreed. They giggled.

A swish, flick, and jab later they left the Room of Requirement. Hermione was impatient to get to her room. The book about friendship bracelets begged to be read. She was curious about the different colors, and their meanings. Also, that necklace deserved further study. It was exquisite. She needed to understand what prompted such a gift.

"Hermione," Harry called as the Fat Lady came in sight.

"Hhmmm," she answered absently.

"There's something else I need to give you," he announced. The reluctance in his voice obvious. Lily and George paused. Hermione looked at Harry. He avoided her gaze.

Hermione turned to Lily. "Can you take these?" she tilted her head toward her packages.

"I'll put them on your bed."

Hermione mumbled her thanks as she dumped the presents into Lily's arms.

Harry glanced to the portrait hole then to George, and back to the portrait hole. "I'll help," George said deciphering the unspoken cue. "Well, to the staircase anyway."

"What is it?" Hermione asked when their friends were gone.

"It's, well, it's…" He produced an envelope, and a small box. "It's from Ron. He gave it to me before he left. He didn't trust an owl from America." Harry stopped short of revealing the whole tale.

Hermione stared at the box. She made no effort to claim it.

"I don't suppose you'd keep it?" she asked hopefully. "We broke up," she reminded him. She took a deliberate step away from Harry.

"He said he wanted to give this to you himself, but he didn't find the right time, and then it would have been weird." Like this, he thought. He sighed. "I promised," he said. Otherwise, he would not have ruined her night. He shoved he package into her hand. "I'd read the letter first." He climbed swiftly through the entrance to Gryffindor Tower.

#

James watched the exchange from a hidden alcove. He couldn't hear their words, but he didn't need to. The box that sat untouched on Hermione's palm said it all. James silently used every expletive he knew. Poor Padfoot. What a mess. Hermione remained frozen, so he approached. He walked loudly, but she didn't register his footsteps.

"Hermione," he said.

"Oh." She came out of her trance. She was crying. Another thing she didn't notice. "James, you startled me."

"Are you all right?"

"What?" She felt her face. She wiped the tears, and sniffed indelicately. "It's late." She didn't move.

"Hermione?" James hurt for Sirius. His friend had stumbled into something. Something messy, and complicated. At the moment he wasn't disposed to compassion for the person he held responsible, but her toneless voice, and empty gaze worried him.

"I think I'll go to bed," she said.

"But –"

"Goodnight." She closed her fingers around the box gingerly.

"Night," he told her retreating form. "Well, damn."

#

Harry ached for Hermione. She ignored him, and George as she trudged up the stairs. The box loosely clasped in a hand stretched as far from her body as possible.

"My brother is an arse," George noted.

"Yeah, he is," Harry agreed. "And so am I."

Focused on Hermione they didn't notice James enter. James was able to secure a good position to eavesdrop.

"A promise," George said.

"I never should have made it. I shouldn't have given it to her." Yes, he promised Ron, but he hadn't considered the consequences. He hadn't known, couldn't have known, the situation they would be facing come her birthday. He supposed Ron, and Hermione would have worked it out by now, but time travel disrupted those plans. A sinking suspicion gurgled in his stomach. A twist, and squeeze. He failed to consider Hermione's feelings. Again. Not that this realization mattered now. He needed the epiphany before he acted. He wondered how much groveling he had in store, and if she would forgive him. Surely there were a set number of times, and he was fast approaching it, if he hadn't already surpassed it.

"What will she do?" George asked.

"Haven't a clue. It's bound to be hard for her."

"She doesn't do anything you expect anymore."

"It was a long time coming together," Harry said.

"She wouldn't let it go." George had been a bystander in the unfolding love story. Hermione clung to the hope of Ron through thick, and thin. It had taken Ron an unnecessarily long amount of time to realize what she offered.

"If anything, she'd seize the opportunity," George continued. False. A tight constriction pinched his chest.

"It is Hermione," Harry said. "Logical and practical Hermione."

"This is the next step."

The confidence rang hollow to them. But to James a picture formed. The news would spread quickly. Let Hermione give her answer, and Sirius would find out on his own. There was no need to alarm him, or rupture his dreams. However, if he didn't intervene Sirius would get more besotted. He'd already given her jewelry. The situation was untenable.

"James?" Remus caught him at the top of the stairs.

"Huh?"

"What's wrong?"

"Moony, we have a problem."

The werewolf knitted his brows. He listened to the tale. Key pieces of information were missing, but it seemed clear enough.

"He'd want to know," Remus said.

"You sure?"

"If it were Lily."

"I see your point. Tell me how it goes."

"Prongs." Remus growled.

"We'll both break his heart."

"You know," Remus hedged. Why ruin Sirius if they didn't have to? "This calls for an investigation. What do we really know about our new housemates? We've barely scratched the surface. There's a chance you missed something vital."

"I saw what I saw, and heard what I heard." Sirius deserved the unvarnished truth. "But knowing more isn't a bad idea."

"Where are the mirrors? We'll need them."

"What do you have in mind?"

"We're going digging."

#

"The party went swimmingly," Lily said as Hermione entered their room. Hermione didn't respond. The box was an ugly weight in her hand. She crossed to the window, and threw it open. She longed to hurl the square into the lake, and rejoice as it sank.

"Hermione?" Lily came up behind her. "Are you okay?"

"Yes." A sniffle. "No." A catch. "I don't know." A broken sob. "I need some time alone."

Lily patted her shoulder. "I'll be downstairs if you need me."

Hermione nodded unable to voice her appreciation. The door shut. She released a tormented cry. She poised her arm to throw. A frustrated sigh. She backed away from the window. Her legs bumped into a bed. She collapsed onto it. A sharp corner jabbed her. She crunched the offending object trying to dislodge it. She produced a rumpled envelope. She slowly broke the seal, and extricated a letter.

His untidy scrawl threatened to break her heart all over again.

My Dearest Hermione,

I know I've made the worst mistakes, and I know I should have done better. It always seems that I realize too late when I'm doing…

She stopped. Reading hurt too much. She folded the letter. The closing above his signature caught her.

All my love,

Ron

The urge to scream and to keep screaming until she had no voice left built. She itched to throw something, to shatter it. To break it into a million pieces. The desire to hex Harry overwhelmed her. More importantly she longed to see Ron. She longed to leave a red imprint on his stupid face. How could he? Why would he?

He left her. He chose to leave. He didn't understand her. No doubt he thought this would fix things, that it would magically erase their break-up. Git. The stupid, stupid arse.

Her anger frothed and bubbled and dissipated. She sobbed into her pillow. He said he loved her. Something he had never said out loud. And he wasn't here.

#

Lily lasered in on Harry, and George. Hermione had been happy before she'd spoken to Harry.

"What did you do to her?" she demanded.

Harry flinched. He floundered under her penetrating glare.

"What did you do?" she repeated slowly, menacingly.

"I didn't do anything," he said lamely shrinking into his chair.

She placed a hand on her hip. She tightened her stance. "She was happy when we left the two of you alone. Now, she's crying. Common sense tells me you are responsible." She poked him harshly in the chest.

"I kept a promise," he said. "She's crying?"

Lily softened at the unmistakable concern. "What promise?" The facts would help her console Hermione.

Harry shook his head. "I can't. It's between Hermione, and …" He couldn't say the name. She was crying. How many times had Ron done that to her? Too many. And how many times would Harry stand idly by? No more. He rose to go to her.

Lily grabbed his arm. "I don't think so."

"I have to do something," he protested.

"No." Lily stood firm. Her grip like iron. "You've done enough."

"He's right," George said. "We have to do something. And I know just the thing to distract her."

Lily loosened her grip at George's wicked grin. "Oh no."

"Oh yes." George clapped his hands. He rubbed them feverishly. The marauders were sidetracked by the upcoming full moon. The diversion provided the perfect planning opportunity. The first Quidditch match of the season was to take place in a little over a month. That's when they would strike. They intended to ridicule the marauders in front of the entire castle. No one missed a game.

#

Groggy, and disoriented Hermione awoke with a pounding headache. She cried herself to sleep. She wore the same outfit as yesterday. The stupid box was still clutched in her hand. She shoved it under her pillow. She couldn't look at it. Trying not to disturb her roommates she climbed quietly out of bed.

She pulled her hair away from her face. Her cheeks were raw, and sticky. Her eyes were worse. A trip to the bathroom helped with the gunk, but they were puffy and sore.

The common room was deserted. The darkness outside bore witness to the early hour. Her mind went completely blank as she stared out the window.

A voice spoke from the shadows, "Couldn't sleep?"

"Something like that," she replied numbly.

"Same here," he confided. He stretched while remaining seated on the couch.

Hermione sat across from him. "What's your problem?"

"Nothing interesting," he replied. "You?"

She looked away, and shook her head. She was not going to venture down that particular path.

The silence grew between them. Neither attempted to break it. She fought her thoughts forbidding them to wander to Ron. He tried to think of something to say. James's words from earlier floated in dizzying whirls.

"Could you tell me something?" she asked quietly.

"I'll try."

"Why do people hurt each other? Why do they say, and do things knowing it's going to inflict pain? Why? I don't understand it." She took a ragged breath. "And just when you start to feel like you'll be okay. That you've come to terms with it. When you've finally got a handle on it. They do something idiotic to upset the balance. Why?" She looked at him expectantly.

Processing the meaning, and order of the words he hesitated. He wanted to offer a proper logical reply. Instead, he said, "I don't know. I haven't figured that out yet."

She nodded accepting his terrible attempt at an answer. She rose from the couch fresh tears burning. She looked down into his wary brown gaze. "You should work on it," she advised. "You never know when you're going to hurt someone in the future."

He leaned back stunned. More by her tone than her words. She said them with a frightening conviction like she knew he would intentionally hurt someone. Remus trembled. The certainty of her words seized him. Foreboding spread into every cell of his being.