Title: How and Why? (Crappy I know)

Summary: Well I somehow managed to just write this fic after hearing a song on the radio. It's different points of view of the station being blown up. And Jo is still alive! (You'll find out how later. And this is just a fic so please don't get mad at me!)

Jo!

I sat in the corner of the bus thinking. I knew I shouldn't have just ran off like that but I didn't know what else to do. I couldn't stay there and let my heart get broken any more. Every time I looked at his face I felt the pain. I guess I saw the bomb as a way out. I mean faking my own death is a little extreme but it was the only thing I could do to get away.

I can't imagine how they all must be feeling. Especially Clancy's wife. I told him to stay away. I told him to get out. But he wanted to be a hero. Clancy was my hero. It was because of him that I was free. I remember that day so well. Ben had told me to stay back whilst the others went to see the Baxter's. I was on watch-house duty after all.

It happened so suddenly. When Clancy brought the bag in I knew what it was. I knew it was a bomb. I didn't want Clancy to open it. But then again I did because I knew I would be free. So I did it. I let him open the bag. And now I feel so guilty. I used him and now he was dead. He was just trying to help me and I hurt him.

I didn't mean for it to happen. None of this was supposed to happen. But it did and now I guess I have to deal with the consequences.

Susie!

Everything was gone. My home was gone, the station was gone and worst of all Jo was gone. They found two lots of human remains when they searched the remnants of the station. One of which belonged to Clancy and the others...that was Jo. all that was left of her was charred bones.

If only she had gotten her transfer. Then this wouldn't have happened. She wasn't even supposed to be working. She was supposed to have been given time off to sort herself out. I didn't even get time to talk to her about how she was feeling. I can't imagine the pain she must have died in. she was a great person. She didn't deserve this. Nobody did.

I may not have known her for as long as everyone else had but she was still a very close friend. She helped me through the pain when Brad died, she was there for me when I needed someone to talk to, and she was even helping me get together with Jonesy.

She was the greatest woman I had ever known. She was strong, courageous and she was always willing to lend a hand. And now no one would ever get her help again. This place is never going to be the same again. Not without Jo, not with a new station. I wont be able to get used to not having Jo there to talk to. Now I've got no one. I can't go to Jonesy because...well he's a guy. And Amy the new girl...well it just doesn't seem right.

The bomb has affected everyone. Ben's blaming himself, Jonesy's started taking his anger out on everything he can find, PJ's always sulking in his office and Tom...well I've never seen him this way before. And by the reaction of everyone else I don't think they have either. He's been most affected by this whole situation. He lost his station, he lost Jo who was like a daughter to him and now Grace has gone missing.

Everything's gone wrong. I wish Jo were here. Then maybe she'd be able to sort things out. If she were here maybe I wouldn't feel so lonely...