FH : HELLO PPL! Yes I am ACTULLY here this time! Whoopwhoop!
Rio smiles as he is the only sane person in this whole fic Hello good reviewers I m FH's second Muse.
HI : HHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!
we kicked them out!Fh : Jake and night aren't here!
HI: Meaning they aren't here!
FH: That's kinda what not here means.
HI: Oh… (whisper) Will, Lego, get ready for distraction #7!
Will: Okay!
HI: 3…2…1, now!
Will+Legolas: THEY'RE TAKING THE HOBBITS TO ISENGARD! THEY'RE TAKING THE HOBBITS TO ISENGARD! THE HOBBITS THE HOBBITS THE HOBBITS TO ISENGARD TO INSEGARD!
Jack: Will! A pirate doesn't sing nonsense Lord of the Rings songs!
Aragorn: Oh, so we're nonsense now?
Jack: Let me think about that ….. yep.
Aragorn: Listen Willy Wonka boy, if there's any movie that deserves a thousand awards, it's Lord of the Rings.
Will: Uh oh…
Jack: Please! The Carribean is sooooo much better than New Zealand!
Legolas: Uh oh…
Aragorn: Yeah, well… I'm King.
Jack: Well, I'm a captain.
Aragorn: Of what? The grass?
Jack: No, The Pearl.
Aragorn: The Pearl?
Jack: No, The Pearl.
Aragorn: That's what I said, the pearl!
Jack: No, The Pearl! U have to italicize it!
Aragorn: Yeah, well it's just a bloody boat.
Will: Oh, dear…
Jack: What…did…U…say…?
HI: DUCK IN COVER!
FH : PREPARE FOR WORLD WAR 3!
Everybody minus Jack : AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Will : and in my dying will, I must say that HI and FH own nothing but their muses, and the oc's, which isn't a lot in this fic but whatever.
Jack : DDDDDDDDDDDDDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
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Hogwart's ……
"- and that concludes why Pixies are very dangerous. Any questions?"
"OHHHH! PICK ME, MR. SNAPE! PICK ME!"
"Yes, Potter. And don't call me Mr."
"Are you not married?"
"Mr. Malfoy, my personal life is none of your business."
"I'm not married."
"Mr. Malfoy-"
"You called me Mr.! I'M NOT MARRIED!"
"Mr.- uh, Student Malfoy, may I answer Mr. Potter's question?"
"I'm not married either!"
"Potter!"
"Now you yelled at me!"
"Well, I am the Professor…"
"Yeah, and I'm Marilyn Monroe."
"Student Potter-"
"What?"
"Can we play with the Hagrid's dragon?"
"Student Malfoy, no, we may not play with Hagrid's dragon. …. Does he even have a dragon. I thought he got rid of Norbert a long time ago…"
"Uhhh, ……. Me no know."
"What, did your ability of speech get washed away with the rest of your brain? Oh, no. That happened a long time ago."
"Hey, don't be mean to Harry!"
"Are you defending the enemy!"
"OMFG! ARE WE PLAYING A VIDEO GAME? OH IS IT STAR WARS? I WANT TO BE THE ENEMY! ME! ME! I CAN BE DARTH VADER! SEE I'VE BEEN PRACTICING! …. Luke (wheeze) I'm your father (wheeze, cough)"
"Student Potter, are you dying?"
"No."
"Bummer. Anyway, class, today we will be making a highly dangerous potion."
"Can I help?"
"No."
"But that's not-"
"Mr. Malfoy, You are testing the last of my patience…"
"Oh, I am?"
"Yes, you are."
"I'm sorry." Hugs Snape.
" …………. Please step away from me, very… slowly…"
"Why? You smell good. Like ….. uhhhh…. Pumpernickel and herring …. with a hint of lemon …. and perhaps some nutmeg."
Harry sniffs Snape.
"No, no. I'd say it was more of an…… almond scent that nutmeg, but you are right on the lemon part. What kind of body wash do you use?"
"Mr. Potter-"
"Well, no time for that. We'll just have to douse you in caramel sauce, let you dry in lemon scented oil, and comb your hair with raisins."
"Mr. Malfoy-"
"I'm bored." Stops hugging Snape.
"Professor, can we call you Professor Snap?"
"No, Mr. Potter. You may not."
"Why?"
"Because you can't."
"Yes we can."
"Wanna bet?"
"See, Professor Snap. That wasn't so hard."
"Mr. Malfoy, can we begin today's lesson?"
"Hmmmm…. One more thing."
"What is it now?"
"CRABBE AND GOYLE!"
"What did that have to do with anything?"
"I don't know, I just felt like saying it. Oh, and this. Cedric is very handsome. And so is…. Ummm… The Scottish boy who plays Quidditch.
"Oliver?"
"Thanks Harry, yeah that's him."
Uncomfortable silence…
"I thought he was kinda annoying."
"Well, Caitlin. No one asked you."
"Why thank you, Francesca."
Another uncomfortable silence….
Everyone in room is confused.
"I'm hungry."
"Me too. Shall we?" Offers arm to Draco.
"We shall." Loops arm in Harry's and they skip off into the hall.
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In the real world Jakeson Middle School……
Harry and Draco ( or at least their real minds, spirits, things) were wondering the now-empty halls. As they had been for the last hour. A tall slightly fat man come approaching them.
"what are you student's doing?"
Both Harry and Draco jumped as the man grabbed both of their shoulder's. now Draco didn't take this to lightly.
" Get off me you filthy muggle!"
"what did you just say to me!"
Harry deiced to step having no idea what status this man was in this giant name they call a school.
" We were…..uhhhhhhh, just on our way to class."
" where are your hall passes?"
Now Harry and Draco having lived in a magical school for almost all of their school years had NO idea what a hall pass was. Lucky for them, the annoying bell rang again. Doors flew open as students came pouring out. Harry and Draco where flooded with small 6th graders. The annoying man lost his grip and both Harry and Draco ran away.
"Just blend in!" Harry yelled top Draco. Luckily, the noise level was extremely high and so no one heard Harry but Draco because he was right next to him. Both teens bent down and walked were everybody else was going. And finally, they managed to break away.
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Hogwarts….
"I wonder when Severus's birthday is."
"No one ever send him any presents. That's so sad."
"Oh! I know! Let's make him a birthday card, and a cake, and… and presents, and a stripper-"
"Okay, going a little over board with that last comment. Remember this is Snape we're talking about here."
"Maybe just the card, cake, and presents."
"What do you think, Cho?"
"I think we should get every one to sign Snape's card and-"
"That's a great idea! Harry, let's do it right now!"
"You guys no, we have to be subtle and-"
But it was too late. Harry and Draco both stood up on their tables in the middle of the Great Hall and promptly shouted, "EVERYONE LINE UP AND SIGN SEVERUS SNAPE'S BIRTHDAY CARD, BECAUSE IT'S THE NICE THING TO DO AND WE LOVE HIM!"
"Oh, Harry! Look at Snape! He's turning a funny red color! He's like… A TOY!"
"What an interesting shade of purple, have you ever seen that on a human before?"
Uh oh!
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HI: and that's all for now!
Legolas: U mean we're still alive?
Will: Yeah, Aragorn hit Jack over the head with a frying pan, so he's passed owt on the couch. IT WAS VERY AMUSING!
R&R please!
