It was about another hour before Gneisenau returned, with Scharnhorst in tow. Now dressed in her normal uniform instead of the ill-fitting hospital gown, she cut a much more imposing(and attractive) figure than earlier. Her somewhat surly expression from earlier had returned though, and I wondered if that was just her default emotion or if she was still working through things.
Gneisenau ushered her sister to my desk, who came to a halt, saluted, and grumbled, "Scharnhorst, reporting for light duty." I guess Vestal had already broken the bad news to her.
I stood up and returned the salute before gesturing for Scharnhorst to take a seat and sat back down myself. "I know it's probably not what you wanted, but the only other option is to wait in the hospital until your rigging is fully repaired, and going by the sour look on your face, I'm fairly certain you'd rather eat your own cap than just sit around in a bed waiting for weeks on end."
"Yeah, yeah," she groused, facing away from me as she crossed her arms over her chest. "Doesn't mean I have to like it."
"Fair enough," I conceded. "I do have a list of available positions for you to pick from, though, so at least you'll have some variety."
"Wonderful," she replied with a healthy dose of sarcasm and all but rolled her eye at me. I took a deep breath and decided to keep going rather than give her the fight she was gunning for.
"So," I began without further preamble, "the jobs are: mess hall server/cleaner, cook's assistant...cook this week is...ah, Glowworm, research assistant for Saratoga, radar operator-both air and surface, and…" My eyes widened as I saw the last job listed as "light duty" and wondered just which joker put this list together. "That one's not for you."
Scharnhorst immediately looked offended and her eye narrowed as she shot me a dirty look. "What the hell's that supposed to mean? Think I can't hack it?"
Taken aback by the sudden hostility, I found myself quickly on the defensive. "What? No, I-"
"Some lowly Iron Blood cripple not good enough for you, Mister Admiral Sir?" At this point, I think it's safe to say she'd crossed the line for insubordination, but I was too busy trying to defend myself to do anything about it.
"You wouldn't like it," I shot back, finding my voice. "At all."
"Oh, one conversation with me and you've got me all figured out, huh?"
At that point, I decided to quit trying to defend my actions and give her what she wanted. I stopped, rearranged the papers on my desk, cleared my throat, and said, "It's service in the Royal Maid Corps. I thought you wouldn't want it considering I've got an after-action report here where you called them 'tea-swigging bastards', but since you're so interested, I can have you over there by this afternoon."
Quickly realizing what she'd just forced her way into, she rapidly shook her head. "No, no," she backpedaled, "That's fine, I-"
"We could get you one of those maid outfits," I continued, deliberately ignoring her, "Just think about it, serving tea with Belfast, calling me 'Right Honourable and Glorious Master'..."
"Enough!" she shouted, staring daggers at me as I leaned back in my chair with a smug grin. "You made your point. I do not want to be a Royal Maid and I'd sooner swim back to the Iron Blood than do any of those things." She paused for a moment, then glanced over her shoulder at Gneisenau. "Did he give you an option for any of these?"
Her sister looked up from her work and shook her head. "No, he simply offered me the position of secretary. Although it may have been due to the fact that he had been romantically involved with the previous occupant and it was becoming awkward…"
My eyes bugged out of my head at the bomb Gneisenau so casually dropped. "Who told you?!" I demanded to know.
"Shangri-La," she calmly answered. "She mentioned it in passing during our turnover."
Scharnhorst looked back at Gneisenau again, and then back to me. "Wait...did you lure her here as some sort of...girlfriend replacement?"
"Lure her?" I indignantly repeated. "All I did was offer her the position because it was light duty and it was painfully awkward with Shangri-La and I being trapped in this space. I wasn't luring her anywhere!"
Gneisenau tapped her lollipop against her lips thoughtfully, and then added, "You know, now that you mention it, we do bear a more than passing resemblance…"
Oh no, I thought. Here it comes… I closed my eyes and took a deep breath and prepared for the worst. When I opened them again, I found myself staring into Scharnhorst's clear blue eye. "It's alright, Admiral," she said in a tone meant to reassure me, but the smug grin plastered on her face told me to wait for the punchline. "I get it. You wanted to swap out for superior Iron Blood engineering, and I can't blame you for that…"
There it is. "Ha ha," I snarkily replied, "But no, she was not picked because I wanted her to replace my ex in a less than professional manner."
"And how do I know that?" She challenged, "How do you won't use long hours or some flimsy pretext to try and get in her pants?"
This had begun to drag on too long and this banter was beginning to wear on my patience. "For starters," I growled, "I learned my lesson the first time about getting romantically involved with someone you're going to be stuck in an office all day long. And second, and this is no slight to you, Gneisenau, but she's just not my type."
Scharnhorst managed to look both mollified and miffed in the same expression, which was truly impressive. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Shangri-La and I didn't work out because she just wasn't my type. We enjoyed each other's company, we're good friends, but we just didn't work as lovers. So if I picked Gneisenau to replace Shangri-la as my girlfriend because they're so similar, I can already tell you, it wouldn't work."
"Ah." Finally, at long last, Scharnhorst seemed to back down, but I was wrong to think it was over. "Well, then you'd have no problem keeping me on as assistant secretary, then."
"Sure, except for the fact that I don't need a second secretary," I countered, suddenly back on the defensive. This woman was unrelenting when she put her mind to it, I can see why the Royal Navy considered her a formidable opponent.
"So you do have something to hide?"
"No!" I snapped. "Is there some reason you wouldn't trust the word of your own sister?"
That one hit a nerve, and her eye widened as her whole face began to flush a deep red. "Why you…" she growled, leaning forward as I did the same. I'm not sure what exactly would have happened next, but I'm sure at least one of us would have regretted it if it wasn't for Gneisenau.
"Actually," she quietly cut in, "I really could do with a hand here."
Both of us turned to look in Gneisenau's direction, who was standing at her desk, several reports clutched in her arms. "You...could?" I asked slowly.
She nodded curtly, hefting said reports. "These are somewhat different than what I'm used to back in the Iron Blood, and as a result, I'm going through these at a slower pace. A second secretary would help increase efficiency until I'm completely familiar with the new system." There was a pregnant pause as Scharnhorst and I exchanged dubious glances and Gneisenau added. "Plus it would let me keep an eye on my sister. She can be...a bit of a handful at times."
"I'm getting that," I dryly quipped as I lowered myself back into my seat and straightened out my jacket. I could override Gneisenau, and pick someone else to help her out for a bit, assign Scharnhorst to a position of my choosing, which, at this point, would be peeling potatoes until I got tired of it. But that would seriously damage my relationship with both of them, and considering Scharnhorst was already being a royal pain in my aft end, I didn't want to escalate this any further. With a heavy sigh, I looked over at her and said, "Go get your berthing assignment from Bremerton, get settled in, and get back here in one hour. Not a minute later, am I understood?"
At the very least, Scharnhorst was nothing if not a gracious victor. "Jawhol, Kommandant," she smiled as she stood, saluting me before spinning around on her heel and practically bolting from the room.
I watched her leave, before looking over at Gneisenau. "Handful, huh?" I grinned.
"Just a bit," Gneisenau smirked as she popped her lollipop back into her mouth and got back to work.
"Scharnhorst and I in an enclosed space for most of the day?" I chuckled and shook my head. "This is going to be a real fun month…"
The first few days proved me wrong. While there was some minor snarking back and forth between the two of us, we all settled into a relatively normal, efficient routine. Scharnhorst may hate paperwork with the fiery passion of a thousand suns, but there's no denying she's damn good at it. Not that I'd ever tell her that. She'd probably take it as a mortal insult.
I'd just handed Gneisenau the daily inventory logs when the phone on my desk rang. I quickly answered it. "Admiral Fraser."
"Admiral, it's Vestal. Taihou's awake and asking for you."
"On my way," I replied and hung up, quickly getting to my feet.
"Who was it?" Gneisenau asked as both women paused in their work to glance in my direction.
"Vestal" I answered as I grabbed my cap and headed for the door. "Taihou's awake so I'm going to go say hello, give her the rundown, see what she wants to do. I'll be back in an hour, but if there's anything urgent, one of you come grab me."
"Understood."
"See you two in a bit."
For the third(and hopefully final) time, I made my way down to the hospital, to Vestal's office, who directed me to Taihou's room. As soon as I knocked on the door, it flew open to reveal Taihou standing on the other side with a broad smile and fully dressed. Well, sort of. She was wearing a red and yellow kimono that had large, voluminous sleeves, but was decidedly short on top and bottom, showing quite a bit of skin. To be honest, part of me wondered just how that top was staying on given how low it rode on her ample bosom.
"This heat, and this throbbing…" she gasped as her blood-red eyes locked onto me, licking her lips. "We meet at last, my dear Commander! I am Taihou, unworthy as I am, at your service." Without further preamble, she giggled and yanked me into a tight embrace, pressing my head into her cleavage.
While I won't say the experience wasn't unpleasant, when someone you've never met before grabs you and plants your face right in their chest, it is a little off-putting. I managed to pry myself free and stagger back, taking a deep breath as I tried to recover. Taihou, however, would not give me the time to do just that. She quickly snatched my hand and dragged me over to the window. "I've been watching your crews working hard to repair me while I was waiting for you. You've been working so hard, come see!"
"It's all thanks to the repair-" I began before she cut me off again.
"A state-of-the-art aircraft carrier with extra reinforced armor," she proudly declared, gesturing to the carrier in drydock. "Just look at my flight deck and enclosed hangar. Amazing, aren't they?"
"Very impressive," I agreed. "And have you beefed up your fire protection since you last ran into-"
"Hmm? What's this about carrying capacity and firefighting systems?" Continuing the trend of not giving me the chance to answer, she smiled and shook her head. "Never mind that... Tell me, what do you think of my... body?" With a lascivious grin, she leaned over, giving me an eyeful before pressing herself against me.
"It's….very nice…" I answered diplomatically. "But m-maybe you're being a bit too forward here?" I did what I could to avert my gaze while taking a few steps back from her. She pursued me, pinning me against the wall with her voluptuous frame, her eyes boring into me like lasers.
She wasted no time with her reply. "But I belong to you, my Commander, body and soul…" she whispered breathlessly. "Why should we wait on formalities and traditions to accept what we know in our hearts?"
I stammered as I continued to back away from her, leading her on a strange dance around the room. "B-because...you need to heal up!" I blurted out, stopping her dead in her tracks and buying me some valuable time. "We want your body fully healed, don't we?"
"Well, yes, but…"
"Good!" I quickly interrupted, seizing the initiative. "Then we're in agreement. You rest up, and if don't want to wait here, we do have some light duty available for you."
Her expression soured and she shook her head. "My place is by your side. If that cannot happen now, then I will wait here and count the days until I am ready for you…" Just as I breathed a sigh of relief, her predatory smile returned, along with my sense of impending doom. "But until then, how about a kiss for your beloved, my Shikikan?"
As I began to back away again, the door burst open and Scharnhorst poked her head in. I'd never seen such a beautiful angel come to my rescue in my entire life.
"Herr Kommandant, we've got a situation," she bluntly announced, looking between Taihou and myself. "Uh...did I interrupt something?"
"Scharnhorst!" I exclaimed in relief, then glanced back over to Taihou. "Nothing that can't wait. I'm sure you're here on urgent business, right?" I gestured with my eyes to Taihou, then back to her with a pleading, if not desperate expression on my face.
Scharnhorst blinked at me, perplexed until it finally sank in. Her clear blue eye widened and she rapidly nodded her head. "Ohhhh, right! Yes, sir. Very urgent. You should come with me right away."
"Of course, of course." I turned and gave Taihou my best fake apologetic smile and shrugged helplessly. Taihou, for her part, was glaring angrily at Scharnhorst for having the audacity to interrupt. "Duty calls. In the meantime, you stay here and rest up, okay? Nice meeting you."
"Farewell, my Commander!" Taihou smiled dreamily. "I will always be with you!"
As soon as the door shut behind us, I let out a huge sigh of relief. "That was outstanding timing, Scharnhorst," I exhaled. "I owe you big time for that one."
"I'll hold you to that, Commander," she grinned. "Although, I gotta ask...what were you two doing in there?"
I thought long and hard about how to phrase my answer. "I was trying to get away from her and she was trying to...consummate our relationship."
"What relationship?" she asked, almost demanded.
"The one in her head, mostly. She seems to think we're made for each other and she must give herself to me."
"Lucky guy," she snickered. "When's the wedding?"
I suppressed a shudder. "Hopefully never."
"Bachelor forever, huh?"
"Not opposed to the idea in general, but I think I'd like to know a girl for more than thirty seconds before I get hitched. Marriage is something I'd like to have to do just once, thanks."
I must have gotten a maudlin look on my face because Scharnhorst playfully nudged me and gave me a broad smile. "Ah, don't worry about it, Commander. I'm sure the right girl's out there just waiting for you."
"So I've been told…" I muttered, glancing over at her, and despite my lack of confidence, her smile was infectious and I couldn't help but return it. "But yeah...maybe she is…"
The next week remained relatively uneventful, aside from love notes from Taihou somehow making their way to my desk every single morning, despite the office door being locked every single night. As the week progressed, however, Scharnhorst became increasingly irritable. While her work never suffered, her mood kept becoming sourer and sourer, with a permanent scowl on her face and an angry look in her eye. The playful snarking stopped, and the atmosphere in the office became tense, oppressive, everyone waiting for the inevitable firestorm to erupt. It finally came to a head when I couldn't find one of our patrol reports that Scharnhorst had filed.
"Hey, Scharnhorst, have you seen the patrol report from Washington's team?" I asked as I shuffled through the paperwork on the corner of my desk.
"I put it on the corner you told me to," she said through clenched teeth.
I was so engrossed in trying to find the report, I wasn't paying attention to just how on edge she was. "Is it possible you accidentally put it somewhere else?"
"For the last time, I left on the goddamn corner just like you asked!" she barked, startling both Gneisenau and me as our heads whipped around to look at the frustrated battlecruiser. "Why do you insist on making this crappy job so much worse with all these dumbass reports? Who even reads these damn things? Do we really have nothing better to do?!"
I waited for her rage to pass and her rant to end, looking at her as she tried to catch her breath and calm down from the explosion that she'd been bottling up for who knows how long. When I thought she'd gotten it all out of her system, I turned to Gneisenau, who was looking between myself and Scharnhorst. "Gneisenau, if you could give us the room, please?"
Scharnhorst visibly paled as Gneisenau hesitated for a moment before she nodded slowly and headed toward the door. The sisters shared a glance before Gneisenau shut the door behind her and Scharnhorst slowly turned her gaze back to me. By that time I'd abandoned my search for the report and was instead scanning Scharnhorst's medical report. I let her sweat for a bit while I quickly skimmed over Vestal's diagnosis, trying to find the specific part I was looking for. Without looking up, I asked, "Would you like to explain what the hell that was about?"
She didn't respond at first, and I glanced up at her to see what the matter was. Conflicting emotions warred across her face as she tried to decide the best course of action. Or stop herself from making an even bigger mistake. When she continued to remain silent, I waited until I found the portion of the report I was looking for, nodded to myself, and set it back on my desk. "Out with it," I ordered. "And the truth."
"All this paper-pushing crap is driving me crazy!" she groused as she looked up at the ceiling for a moment. "I'm not meant for this, I'm meant to fight, to train, to push myself harder than filing reports!"
I nodded as I listened to her vent. "But you've done an admirable job at it," I complimented her. "You and Gneisenau both."
"I know, and I hate it. How you two stand it, I'll never know"
"I've seen what happens if you slack on paperwork, and trust me, it gets real ugly, real fast. So while it's nowhere near the fun part of my job, it keeps the base going and helps the girls win out there. In my book, that's a net win."
"Yeah, well, I'd like an actual win if you don't mind," she sneered.
I gave her a smug, predatory smile, much to her confusion, and said. "Alright, I'll get you that win. If you can earn it."
She cocked a disbelieving eyebrow at me and took a step towards me. "Excuse me?"
"I said, 'if you can earn it'," I repeated, taking a step toward her as well, keeping the cocky grin on my face. "Meet me down at the gym, ten minutes. If you don't have athletic gear, I'm sure there's something down there in your size."
For a long second, Scharnhorst peered at me, trying to figure out what game I was playing. When she couldn't scry it from my eyes, she gave me a confident grin and took a step back. "Alright, Commander...you're on!"
A/N-Checking her medical files? Challenging her to something? What could it be now? I guess we'll have to wait and find out. Until next time, fair winds and following seas!
