I'm late, but here it is! Life enjoys slamming the inspiration out of me, it seems. I had so much trouble writing this chapter, I don't know why... :/
LeaValdez23: I'm glad you're enjoying it!
ahyeon: I've actually already got the first Klaus (in his real body) encounter written XD
The Battling Bard: Don't worry! There won't be too many Elijah-less chapters (I won't disclose the exact amount, but definitely not infinite)!
Hackslash24x7: Thanks, cheers ;)
Disclaimer: I don't own The Vampire Diaries, only my own characters and plots
The sun shone brightly on my face as I rode my bike towards the Grill. Thank god we were allowed to wear shorts to work, because the heat had been almost unbearable at the start of summer.
Several weeks had passed since the sacrifice. Stefan was gone, gone with Klaus, and it was more than noticeable. Elena was almost frantic in her hopes of finding him, grasping for every possible straw she could reach. I didn't blame her.
The first half of this year had been a year of sacrifices. Elena. John. And, then, Stefan. Offering himself to Klaus so Damon could live, and we hadn't seen a glimpse of him since.
Elena was annoyed with Damon, because she felt like he didn't take her seriously. Everything she brought to him, every clue she'd found, he shot down.
Whenever I was with her, I could feel her frustration building up more and more. Of course I didn't blame her. Her boyfriend, whom she loved, was gone. And he hadn't tried to contact her. If I was in her position, I'd probably worry too. We were kind of the same like that, she and I. We were stubborn.
I locked my bike outside the restaurant, and soaked in the blue sky and fresh air the best I could before going in. There were some tables and chairs placed outside, by the street, and the doors were open, but if most of my time the next couple of hours would be spent indoors I wanted to cherish it.
After grabbing an apron and a notepad, I stuck a pen into my ponytail. I'd forgotten who was working today, and smiled when I saw Matt unpacking napkins by the counter.
''Hey Matt,'' I greeted.
He looked back over his shoulder. ''Oh, hey!''
''Is Sarah here?'' I asked, and leaned a little to the side to see if she was in the kitchen.
''No, Jeremy was supposed to take her shift today,'' Matt said. ''But he's not here yet.''
''He's been late a lot,'' I frowned. ''Do you know if he's okay?''
''Aren't we all a little messed up by now?'' Matt said, laughing humourlessly.
Matt knew of my involvement by now. He'd overheard one of my conversations with Elena and Caroline a couple of weeks ago. Considering the content of that conversation, it didn't take much to put two and two together.
''At this rate, Roberta's going to fire him,'' I pointed out. Jeremy had gotten a job at the Grill at the start of summer break, but he hadn't handled it very well lately.
''I know.''
I hummed. ''Do you need help?''
''Sure,'' Matt said. The place was kind of empty so far, and everyone that was there to serve Matt had already taken care of. I dug into the pile of napkins Matt had created and started placing them on tables.
After going back and forth a few times, the pile was gone, and Matt was busy brewing some coffee. I grabbed the leftover plastic to put in the bin, when I saw Matt do something strange.
''Hey,'' I tapped his shoulder with my closed fist. ''What are you doing?''
Matt hushed me, and looked around to see if anyone was paying us any attention. ''It's vervain,'' he whispered.
''Your putting it in the coffee?''
He nodded. ''Sheriff's orders.''
''That's actually a good idea,'' I said. ''I mean, it is a good idea.''
''Feel like doing it when I'm not working?'' Matt suggested.
I shrugged. ''Sure. Do you keep it here or...?''
''Nah, someone would probably find it,'' he said, and coughed, ''Sarah. I mean, it's only been you, me, and Jer for a while so she's the only one who doesn't know anything.''
''So where do I...'' I shut my mouth when he put a small bag in my hands.
''You can take this, I'll get some more later.''
''Okay, sure.''
All of a sudden, Jeremy sauntered into the restaurant. He had been through a lot. More than most of us, really. The same night Damon went somewhat crazy from the werewolf bite, he'd been behind Damon, but in front of Sheriff Forbes' gun. I didn't hear about it until the day after, and then Bonnie had already brought him back to life. Brought him back to life. It still felt weird thinking about that; and, I had no idea what was going on inside Jeremy's head. Maybe he was struggling to deal with it. Maybe I should-
''Uh oh,'' Matt brought me out of my mental babbling. ''This is not good.''
Matt and I watched the scene unfold in front of us. Roberta was not in a good mood to begin with, so it was not pretty. Jeremy seemed pretty out of it through the whole conversation, though, so I wasn't sure whether or not he was actually listening to her. But, he seemed to have gotten the gist of it, as he turned on his heel and went straight out the way he came.
Roberta was mumbling things to herself on her way back into her office, probably things about kids these days. On her bad days, she was kind of like that. But she was a fair employer.
''That was...'' Matt shook his head.
I frowned at the door through which Jeremy had just exited. ''I just hope he's okay.''
It was like time was standing still. Even though the sun was out and it was summer break, the Grill was quiet and business slow.
He had a sour look on his face. ''Can we switch sections?''
''Why?'' I asked.
''Caroline and Tyler just sat in mine.''
''Oh.'' It took me a second to realise that he didn't want to see Caroline with Tyler. He'd been a little bitter about that for a long time now, and I didn't want him to get more stressed out or angry about it than he already was. ''Yeah, sure.''
''Thanks,'' he muttered.
Matt had the tables outside, in front of the Grill. When I came out, Caroline and Tyler where engaged in an intense conversation.
''Hey guys!'' I greeted them with a smile.
Caroline saw me and rolled her eyes. ''Did Matt make you switch sections?''
''I think he thinks you're dating,'' I said. ''So yeah.''
Tyler shot Caroline a meaningful look. ''So does my mother.''
''What?'' Caroline's eyes grew wide.
''We're together all the time, it's not a leap,'' Tyler shrugged.
''That's crazy,'' Caroline said. ''That's crazy, right?'' she turned to me.
''If you say so,'' I shrugged. ''Do you guys want something?''
Caroline ordered an ice tea under her breath, and I was pretty sure she was somewhere far off in her thoughts. I wondered if vampires could actually enjoy normal food, I mean I'd seen them eat. But did it taste anything? I took Tyler's order as well, and left them alone, going back into the restaurant, grabbing a tray to pick up dishes on the way, and contemplating vampires and human food. I couldn't believe I'd never asked anyone that before.
In the corner of my eye, I noticed that someone had occupied one of my tables by the wall. At first, my heart jumped when I saw a dark clad torso, and a dark set of hair, but then I realised that it wasn't who I thought it was. I really wish my mind wouldn't play tricks on me like that. Why was I even thinking of him sitting there? The plate clanged against the tray when I, a little to forcefully, put it on top of another one.
Maybe Matt was right. Maybe we all were a little messed up. I thought I'd put Elijah out of my mind by now, but I guess he'd made a bigger impact than I thought he would. He wasn't a man easy to forget. Every angsty thought about that horrible night somehow always led back to the fact that he'd shattered everything everyone worked for. A bitter but caring part of me wondered if he'd gotten what he wanted – if he'd gotten his siblings back.
''Hey Ev?'' Matt asked when I brought him the dirty dishes. ''Are you going to Elena's party tonight?''
''Yeah,'' I said. ''Because I know there won't be any underaged drinking going on.''
Matt smiled at me, his eyes twinkling. ''Don't you think it's weird being human in all of this?'' he asked.
Right. Here's the thing. Matt knew I knew about everything, but he didn't know about me. That had been my secret to tell, in everyone's opinion, and I hadn't told it. Sure, I was human, but when Matt said human he meant normal. Which I wasn't. And I felt bad keeping it from him, but somehow, I wasn't really at the point where I could or wanted to tell everyone involved my secrets yet. Especially when there, apparently, were powerful things out there that wanted to know.
''I guess,'' I said quietly. ''Come on, let's get all this stuff done so we can get out of here.''
The Salvatore house was packed when I got there. At least this was one of those scenes when I was overloaded by happiness and euphoria rather than fear and anguish. After weeks of trying to expose myself, it was getting easier to control this side of the spectrum. The sad part, not so much improvement. I was happy that I hadn't had to be exposed to those kinds of emotions in a while. Both for my sake and other's.
The music was so loud I found myself hoping everyone was wearing earplugs, and I wasn't even in there yet. I found Alaric sitting outside the house, with a look on his face like he'd rather be anywhere else but there.
''Hi,'' I said, and joined him on the balustrade.
''Evangeline,'' he said. ''Hey.''
''Enjoying the party?'' I asked with a laugh.
He hid his face in his hands and groaned. ''I am every parent's worst nightmare. I am the chaperone teacher from hell.''
''I feel you,'' I said. ''But I'm here for Elena.'' I thought about the gift I'd left in the car. It wasn't much, but I always tried to be considerate when it came to gifts. I tried to pick thoughtful ones.
''I love high school parties,'' Damon suddenly appeared, startling me a little. ''Moreau, doesn't this go against your goody-two-shoes morality?''
''It's Elena's birthday,'' I said, ignoring his comment.
''Speaking of the devil,'' Damon sang. ''Hello birthday girl!''
Elena came out, looking anything but happy. ''Drink,'' she demanded, and grabbed a glass of whiskey from Damon.
''What's wrong?'' I asked, pretending to not notice her drinking.
''Jeremy's smoking again,'' she muttered.
I knew Jeremy had done stuff like that after their parents died. It wasn't a big secret, especially not in a small town like this. Good or bad, people talked. But that was what, two years ago now? If he'd gotten back into it, something had to be wrong. He'd lost his place at the Grill, too. Maybe something was off between him and Bonnie. I knew they were together, but Bonnie was spending the whole summer with her dad's family.
''Is his stash any good?''
''Damon!'' I exclaimed. Klaus' blood might've cured his werewolf bite, but he came back his same brash self.
''You're an ass,'' Elena glared at him, before turning to Alaric. ''Talk to him, please. He looks up to you.''
I followed her when the stormed off, deciding that drunk and angry probably wasn't the best combination.
''Hey, Elena!''
I don't think she could hear me, and she was dead set on the stairs so I followed her to the top floor. The music was almost as loud up here as downstairs. Couldn't escape it anywhere, it seemed.
''You're not in a good mood,'' I noted, when she stopped, leaning against the wall with a sigh.
''You can feel that?'' she asked sourly.
''No,'' I said. ''I can tell, because I'm your friend.''
She sighed and hid her face in her hands. ''I'm sorry.''
''Don't worry about it.''
''None of this...'' she stopped, sinking down against the wall. ''None of this seems important.''
I walked up to her and joined her on the floor. ''I get it.''
''I'm not going to give up on him,'' she said quietly. ''I'm not. I can't.''
''You love him, Elena,'' I said. ''I'd be surprised if you could. But, you know, sometimes it's okay to take a few hours for yourself.''
''All I want is to find him.''
''I know,'' I murmured. ''But I just thought you should hear that.''
''I need to talk to Damon,'' she said suddenly. ''I'll see you later.''
She pulled her dress down as she got up, and walked down the hall with determined steps.
I sighed, rubbing the back of my neck. Where on earth was all of this going to take us?
A little while later, I was still sitting in the same spot when I heard someone call my name.
''Ev!'' Elena appeared through a door further down the hall. ''You're still here.''
I got on my feet. ''Yeah, well, parties aren't really my thing.'' My attempt to avoid the mass of dancing, drunk students downstairs resulted in me staying where she'd left me, playing on my phone.
''You need to see this.''
When I entered Damon's room, Elena grabbed my arm and pulled me towards a closet.
''What do you make of this?'' she asked.
The door was filled with newspaper cuttings, placed on a map of the whole country. Someone had placed post-its on some of them.
''Klaus,'' I said, reading Damon's handwriting. ''Damon's been tracking him?''
''Without me,'' Elena said bitterly. ''The whole summer! I went to him with leads, and thoughts, and he just...''
My eyes stopped on the newspaper clips marked with Stefan's name. Dead bodies found. Mutilated bodies found.
Elena really loved Stefan. So much that she couldn't see what was right in front of her. At least, if Damon was right about this. If he was, then...
''Elena...'' I began, not knowing what to say or do.
''What are you doing here?'' Damon's voice rang from behind me.
''Why didn't you tell me?'' Elena blurted. ''Why did you keep it a secret?''
''Can we not do this right now? I'm having a really bad night.'' I heard them speak behind me, but my eyes were still scanning all the news clippings and notes.
''All summer,'' Elena said. ''Every single time I came to you with a lead, you made me feel like an idiot for having hope.''
''You were an idiot,'' he spluttered. We both were.''
''Tell me what you know, Damon,'' Elena demanded.
''Elena...'' I tried again, turning around. Sure, Damon got his points across, but he wasn't known to be gentle about it.
Damon's eyes went to me. ''You get it, right? You're not blinded by the past Stefan like this one?''
I nodded weakly. I didn't want to believe it myself, but Damon wouldn't lie about this.
''See, Elena?'' Damon said through gritted teeth. ''Even Evangeline can make it out, just by looking at that door.'' I don't think he meant it as an insult, so I decided not to take it as one.
''What's he talking about, Ev?''
''You've been there?'' I asked Damon, looking at one of the clips that mentioned two dead women.
''Yeah,'' he said, his blue eyes piercing into mine. I knew what he meant.
''We're supposed to be in this together. Why didn't you tell me that you've been tracking Klaus' victims?''
''Elena,'' I paused. ''Damon...''
''Because they're not Klaus' victims, Elena, they're Stefan's!''
A chill ran down my spine. It was one thing realising it, and another one completely to hear it admitted out loud.
''What?'' Elena whispered.
''He's left a trail of body parts up and down the eastern seaboard,'' Damon said through gritted teeth.
''No,'' Elena's shook her head. ''You're wrong.''
''I've seen it happen before. He's flipped the switch. Full-blown ripper.''
''Stop it, Damon,'' Elena's voice trembled.
''No, you stop, Elena!'' Damon burst out angrily. ''Stop looking for him. Stop waiting for him to come home. Just stop! Stefan is gone and he's not coming back.'' He paused. ''Not in your lifetime.''
Lips pressed into a tight line, he looked at Elena one last time, storms in his eyes, before leaving.
Elena had slowly, but surely, started to fill up with sadness. It was seeping out of her and in to my pores, but it was a dull sadness. Easier to handle than complete anguish.
I could almost feel her tears start to fall before I could see them. Hesitating, still a bit put off by touching people, I placed my hand on her dress-covered back.
''I don't want to believe it,'' she whispered through the tears.
''I don't know what to say,'' I mumbled.
''He still cares,'' Elena said. ''He has to.''
''Of course he does,'' I said. ''Feelings can't just go away, there's... there's no way. You can't shut out love but keep anger.''
''He can't be gone,'' she cried and hugged me. I was careful with my hands, but even if I did come in contact with her skin I was much better at handling it now.
''Damon kept this from you so you wouldn't have to see Stefan's bad side,'' I said, and at the same time wondering how the nice guy I somewhat knew could possibly have done things like that. ''You know that, right?''
''He shouldn't have,'' Elena mumbled.
''Maybe not,'' I agreed. ''But you're in on it now. We can still find him.''
''You shouldn't have to get involved in this too,'' Elena sniffled as she let go of me to wipe her eyes.
''You're my friends, Elena,'' I said seriously, hoping she'd realise by some time that I cared enough for her to be kind of stuck with me. ''I'll help you. However I can.''
She offered me a small, bitter, smile. ''I just wanna go home right now.''
''I can take you,'' I offered. ''I got the car for once.''
The ride back to Elena's was pretty quiet. I was stuck in my mind, thinking about feelings. Humanity, as everyone called them.
We didn't know if Stefan had turned his switch off or not. I didn't know how it worked, and to my knowledge I hadn't run into any vampire that had 'turned it off', but my guess was they could be just as bad with it off as with it on.
Somehow, I was struggling to wrap my mind around the switch as either black or white, on or off. Emotions could be too strong for that to be possible, right? You don't just 'turn off' feelings that powerful for more than a little while. They had to be there, still. Even with everything I could do, I don't think I had the powers to manipulate my own feelings... other than opening up to other's emotions on purpose, I suppose.
''Hey, wait,'' I said as Elena moved her hand to open the door when I'd parked outside her house. I leaned over and grabbed the gift from the backseat.
''Here.'' I handed it to her. ''Maybe it hasn't been the best one, but... Happy birthday.''
''Thanks, Ev...''
''Keep your head up,'' I said, mustering up what I hoped looked like an encouraging smile. ''I'll see you, alright?'' She nodded, and got out of the car.
The absent look in her eyes stuck in my mind almost all the way home. I was kind of worried how what had happened tonight was going to affect her. Granted, I didn't know what it was like to love someone like she loved Stefan – but love was the same nonetheless, right? And, you couldn't just snap your finger to make it go away... so of course I didn't blame her for having hope. She should have.
I made a mental note to talk to either Damon or Caroline about this whole switch thing. If Stefan had turned his off, and if we ever found him, there had to be some way to get him back... because, with everything I knew about emotions, I just couldn't believe it.
You don't just turn off love.
Okay. Like I said, for some reason this chapter was slow in the making. It seems filler-ish, I suppose; but, as I've said too many times before, and as a certain idealistic outlaw would say – I have a plan (thumbs up to those who get that reference). And I have my endgames – but I won't divulge that information just yet...
(Also, I'm planning on linking the playlist when I post the next chapter).
Let me know how you liked the chapter :)
