Hi everyone! I thought, since it's been a while, that I'd reply to a couple of questions that's come up – old and new.
1. I'm not planning to abandon this story, I have several chapters written that just need some touching up.
2. I started writing this story several years ago – some things I wrote back then I probably would reconsider now. I am also aware of a few plot holes, the major one being the money issue. I should've included the reason for their shortage in the beginning, and since then I've tried figuring out how to smoothly bring it into the story. I did mention them paying for relatives' care, as well as her college fund being depleted. It could use a clearing up as to why in a rewrite, I'm aware. Right now, I'll try to get into it in coming chapters.
3. At the beginning of the story, Evangeline was a long-time substitute, which would justify her worries regarding students.
4. Whenever I rewrite it, I'll use AmE. Right now, I'll stay with BrE for the sake of cohesiveness (this applies to some layout choices as well).
5. If you speak Scandinavian or French and don't feel comfortable reviewing in English, feel free to do so in either :)
6. A kick-start to Evangeline finding out what she is = this chapter!
Disclaimer: I don't own The Vampire Diaries, only my own characters and plots.
The day before the Night of Illumination I woke up later than usual. When I'd escaped the disorientated feeling of waking up I turned on my back and stared up at the ceiling.
We were supposed to meet up today. Elena, Bonnie and I. I knew what we were going to talk about, but how do you prepare for something like that? No matter what, if Bonnie was there, and Caroline once she'd been brought up to speed, we'd be safe. Sure, I had my power, but I didn't have the speed or strength to match a vampire. And Elena... Stefan still loved her. He wouldn't hurt her. No way.
And then there was Rebekah. She hadn't just stopped by school once, no, she came back. Not everyday, but whenever she was there it was impossible to miss her. She particularly seemed to enjoy cheerleading practice, much to Caroline's dismay. She even showed up to class now and then.
If she stayed behind, like Bonnie said, to keep an eye on Stefan, and she found out what we were doing, our odds would drop considerably.
I put my hands over my face and sighed. The only way to get my mind of everything, for just a little bit, was to get out of bed.
Slipping some socks on, I stepped out of my room. I hadn't heard my mother get up so I half expected her to still be asleep, but when I came down the stairs and into the kitchen she was busy eating breakfast, a book open on the table in front of her.
''Hey,'' mum said from behind her abnormally large coffee mug. It covered half her face.
''Isn't that supposed to be for tea?'' I asked pointedly.
''No,'' she said, but I could see her eyes crinkling as she smiled. ''Have you finished everything for tomorrow?''
I nodded. ''Yeah. I put up the posters a few days ago. Are you coming?''
''I was planning on it.''
''Okay,'' I smiled and went to make myself something to eat. ''Are you going to work today?''
She nodded. ''I have a night shift. There's some leftovers from last night you can take for dinner.''
I took the poor excuse for a sandwich – bread and butter – and a glass of juice and headed towards the living room.
''No, wait,'' my mother said, and coughed when she almost choked on her coffee. ''I need to talk to you about something.''
''What?''
''I was wondering what your plans for this spring was.''
This talk was inevitable. I figured it would come eventually, especially when I didn't send out applications before the summer.
''I'm staying.''
''You are?''
''Yes,'' I replied slowly. ''And before you say anything, I'm still going to college, I just don't know when.'' Every word coming our my mouth was true, but they still felt like lies burning my tongue. Not wanting to lie to my mother was one reason I hadn't brought the subject up myself, just to ease her mind – because I knew she wondered.
''I just don't want you to feel like you have to stay here,'' she said. ''I don't want you to feel like you're...'' she struggled for the right word. ''Like you're stuck here.''
''Okay,'' I said, and put down the plate and glass I had in my hands. ''First off, there's nothing wrong with living and working here. Second, I'm not stuck. Maybe I felt a little stuck before, but not now. Not as much, at least.''
''I know...'' she paused, a frown slowly forming on her face, ''You've made a lot of new friends, and that's great. I just don't want you to... I don't know, put your life on hold.'' She sighed, her eyes glazing over. ''I know your dad would've wanted you to go.''
''Okay...''
''I'm sorry...'' she sighed. ''I know we never talk about him, and-''
''Mum, it's fine. Really.''
There were very few times I talked about my dad: when mum brought him up; when someone asked; or back when I was little and had no idea why everyone else in my class had two parents when I only had one. It didn't make me sad. It made my mother sad, I knew that, so for her to bring him up now...
''I still want to go to college, mum,'' I said. ''I just don't know when's the right time.''
''I just don't want you to feel like you have any obligations here, because you don't. I get on fine, you know? Even with the loans and everything...''
''Don't worry,'' I said, and squeezed her shoulder. An awkward silence ensued. ''By the way, Elena and Bonnie are coming over later,'' I added, to change the subject and maybe make her a little happier.
''Yeah?'' she smiled, even though I could tell she was tired and not completely done with thinking about our previous topic, and she knew I knew. ''You guys gonna do something fun?''
I thought about the main reason for the three of us getting together. ''Yeah... I suppose.'' If plotting against a hundred year old vampire counted as fun.
I had just finished hanging a batch of laundry when the doorbell rang.
''My loyal subjects,'' I greeted Elena and Bonnie with a smile, pushing the door completely open and allowing them in. God, I was nervous.
''Only in school,'' Elena rolled her eyes.
''Is your mum home?'' Bonnie asked while hanging up her coat.
''No, she's at work.''
Bonnie nodded. ''Good.''
I showed them into the living room and locked the front door before I joined them.
''Alright,'' I said, sitting down on the couch with my hands in my lap. ''What's new?'' The words felt ridiculous, but I didn't know how to begin this conversation, or where to begin. Looking down, I saw my fingers tremble. I squeezed my hand into a fist.
''We need to figure out how to get Stefan alone,'' Bonnie began. ''And we can't have Rebekah anywhere near. He's dangerous enough on his own.''
''Well, he killed Dana, so.''
My eyes snapped to Elena. She avoided my gaze, but the shame surrounded her like a fog. ''You didn't tell me about that,'' I said quietly.
''We...'' Elena paused, her eyes flickering from me to the floor. ''We didn't want to worry you.''
''Because the little things you told me, like, Tyler and Matt dying wouldn't have me worried?''
''I don't know,'' Elena sighed. ''I know you feel everything much stronger than the rest of us, so I just thought-''
''I'm not that fragile, Elena,'' I cut her off, sounding harsher than I intended. ''Not anymore, at least.'' In that moment, it felt right to stand up for myself. Going with the flow came natural to me, and I never wanted to offend anyone. I never expected anything in return, but I wanted her to feel like she could trust me.
''I know you're angry about Stefan,'' I said quietly. ''But please don't keep everything to yourself when there are people there for you. Stuff like this only pushes them away.''
''I know,'' she sighed. ''And I am sorry, I just...''
''I gave you space, before,'' I continued. ''I didn't want to pry and make it any worse. But please, just don't leave me out of it. Especially with what we're going to do.''
The atmosphere had changed from just outright strange to tense and uncomfortable.
''So,'' I broke the silence, ''has Bonnie told you what we talked about?''
''A little,'' she replied. ''Do you think it would work?''
''I really have no idea,'' I said. ''So I can't make any promises. Maybe it'll just be temporary, I don't know.''
''Either way,'' Bonnie said, ''it's worth a try.''
''I need to tell you guys something,'' Elena said suddenly. ''The night of the first day of school we tried to capture Stefan.'' Bonnie narrowed her eyes.
''You did what?'' Bonnie exclaimed.
''I didn't want either of you to get involved,'' Elena said quickly. ''Stefan could've hurt you-''
''Stefan could've hurt you!'' Bonnie fumed.
Elena shook her head. ''Klaus ordered him to protect me.''
''He didn't order him to protect Damon,'' Bonnie said sourly. ''Because I guess he was in on it? Ric, too? Caroline?''
''Caroline knew, but it was just the rest of us,'' Elena mumbled.
''But why not even tell us about it?'' I asked.
''Because I didn't want you guys to get hurt,'' Elena exclaimed.
''And we don't want you to get hurt,'' I said. ''If we could've helped-''
''Exactly,'' Bonnie said angrily. ''But no if. We could have helped.''
The following seconds were made up of angry frown lines and glaring eyes.
''So, are we going to get down to business or not?'' I asked, trying to direct the conversation down a different road, because this wasn't getting us anywhere right now.
The lines on Bonnies forehead slowly disappeared, and she inhaled deeply. ''Okay, so here's what I'm thinking...'' she began, and we delved into a long and hard discussion that kept going until we just decided to make it a sleepover.
''I told you it would be hard to find somewhere to park.''
My mother shushed me, and turned a corner. ''Aha!'' she exclaimed. ''See? Told you.''
''This is not close to the square,'' I pointed out.
''Distance is relative,'' she sang, not letting me get to her.
''I should've brought a field snack.''
''Oh, be quiet,'' she chuckled. ''Come on. Carol will kill me if it's not finished in time.''
After spending the night, Elena and Bonnie had left around ten. It had been a restless night – for all of us, I think. I wasn't used to having people stay the night. That, and of course, the fact that we'd decided to trap Stefan tomorrow.
Step one consisted of Elena luring him to her house. Jeremy was supposed to be working a shift at the Grill, so it would be empty. We figured Stefan wouldn't fall for it if he didn't know me, Bonnie and Caroline would be there; he would hear us, no doubt. It wasn't the most fail-proof plan, but if we managed to get that far than the rest would, well, probably, fall into place.
Step two relied on Bonnie. If Bonnie didn't immobilise him and Caroline failed as backup, who knows what would happen.
And step three... was me.
Since last night I'd freaked out more times than I could count. I got myself under control pretty quick, but the panic seeped back in soon enough. Theoretically, I thought I could do it. It made sense that maybe... it could actually work. And it scared me. Both the thought that it would work and Stefan would end up himself again, and the thought that it wouldn't and- well, who knows.
I had to try, that's what I tried to tell myself. I just had to try. For Stefan's sake, Elena's, everyone else's... my own. If I did this, and it worked; then I was capable of so much more than I ever could have imagined.
The town square was packed when we got there. I think Roberta was a little irritated when I told her I couldn't work for this event. When I saw how busy the Grill was, I knew she would be annoyed. But, I'd already promised Mrs. Lockwood.
I was digging through a box of decorations when I heard my name being called from somewhere.
''Sarah!'' I smiled as she approached me. ''You volunteering too?''
She made a face. ''My mum made me. You?''
''I'm here by free will,'' I laughed.
As we went to hang some lanterns up, I could tell she had something on her mind.
''Okay,'' I said, when I was afraid she might lose her bottom lip from chewing on it too much. ''Spit it out.''
''What?'' She looked at me, eyes wide.
''Whatever's bothering you.''
She smiled. ''Nothing's bothering me. I mean, not bothering me.''
''So it's gossip?'' I guessed, and she shrugged sheepishly.
''Depends on how you define gossip...'' she trailed off. ''It's just... that guy. Didn't it work out between you guys?''
I sighed. ''Sarah, there never was anything to begin with.''
''Okay, okay,'' she held her hands up. ''Sorry.''
''How about you?'' I asked, trying to direct the conversation away from me. ''Any news?''
''Well, Tyler didn't work out,'' Sarah made a face. ''Obviously. So not really. My mum wants to get a cat, does that count?''
I laughed. ''Of course it does.''
''Yeah,'' Sarah said, looking down at her feet. ''Yeah, cats are better than guys anyway.''
''Come on, let's get these last ones up.'' I wanted to get her in a better mood. Not that hanging lanterns was going to help, but at least it was something.
I knew she really wanted to be with someone. Maybe so much that she saw things in guys that weren't even there, she only wished for them to be.
''Hey, you wanna come over Saturday night?'' Sarah asked. ''We could have a Lord of the Rings sleepover. Or we could watch Shawshank. I've got plenty of ice cream.''
''Shawshank and ice cream?'' I laughed. ''Don't think I was able to stomach anything last time I saw that one. But yeah, sure.''
Sarah grinned, and I was bitterly reminded about how normal life could be. Bitterly, but pleasantly.
''As a long-time member of the Historical Society, I am especially proud to be kicking off this day of festivities. Thank you, volunteers. Tonight, we turn off our town's lights and flare up our lanterns in honour of the Night of Illumination started by our founders 150 years ago. And here's out very own Tobias Fell, with a history lesson.''
''We did a good job,'' my mother whispered in my ear, smiling. I knew she was a little bitter about all the people signing up, showing up, but not helping at all. Getting in the mayor's good graces was apparently worth most anything.
She was right, though. The square looked real nice, and when all the lights turned on it would transform into nothing short of a fairyland.
My phone buzzed. ''Hello?'' I turned away from my mother and scanned the crowd.
''Change of plans,'' Elena's voice sounded stressed. ''We go now.''
''What?'' I asked in surprise. ''Where?''
''The jail. Hurry.''
''Of course,'' I replied, and slowly lowered the phone from my ear. I reached over and tapped my mother lightly on the shoulder. ''I gotta go,'' I explained. ''Friend emergency.''
''Sure,'' she smiled, and I was off.
My heart was pounding. I knew I had to be calm for any off this to work – if it even would work – but my nerves made me jittery and messed up my concentration; allowing the feelings of some of the people I passed seep into me.
''Get yourself together,'' I mumbled under my breath. It only helped a little.
''Elena?'' I called softly after feeling the handle of the door leading down to the cells, and opening it when it gave away.
She appeared in the door seconds later.
''How did this all happen?''
Her forehead shone with a thin layer of sweat, and I felt her nerves before I managed to close off. ''Something's opened up a door for every supernatural being with unfinished business.''
I didn't like where this was going, even though I understood very little. ''Okay... how-''
''This is Lexi,'' Elena made a quick introduction and gestured towards an intimidating blonde, who despite her quick smile gave off a vibe telling me she wasn't to be messed with.
I hesitated. ''Hi.'' I wanted to ask what on earth was going on, who else was here, was my mother in any danger? The people out there? But, I felt the tension, the pressure of time, and the desperation in Lexi's eyes made it easier to focus.
This was it.
''I warmed him up for you,'' Lexi smiled, but I could see the sadness in her. She was great at covering it up, though.
''You really think this is gonna work?'' Stefan spat. He was strapped to a chair. ''You're pathetic.''
''If it doesn't work, we'll just go back to plan A,'' Lexi said, and slammed a stake into Stefan's shoulder. I winced, looking to Elena. The expression on her face told me this was what would have to be done. If Lexi had done it before, then it obviously worked.
''He won't get out of...'' I asked and pointed to the restraints keeping him back.
''I'll wring your neck. I swear.''
Lexi smiled. ''He won't.''
I took a deep breath. My gut told me to trust her. ''Okay.''
Approaching... this Stefan was nothing short of terrifying. His eyes were dark and boring into mine, and I quickly realised that I'd do better if I avoided his gaze altogether.
I decided to stand behind the chair, just in case. Reaching out, I tentatively placed my hands against the back and sides of his neck, steering clear of his teeth. Just in case.
''Elena told you I'm not sure exactly how to do this?'' I said to Lexi. ''I mean – I can make him feel things, I think, but I can't connect that to certain memories...''
''We've always got plan A,'' she said confidently. ''Shoot.''
''You should talk to him,'' I said. ''Bring up memories. So that there's something to relate to.''
The first thing I had to do was clear my head. Focusing on my breathing, I closed my eyes and listened to Lexi talking. She mentioned things I'd never heard about, about her and Stefan, and then went on to talk about Damon and eventually Elena. I concentrated on every word she said, every little tone in her speech, and focused.
At first, there was nothing.
Something about his mind was keeping him from being receptive. It wasn't as open as many others seemed to be. I could feel what I wanted to transfer, but none of it manifested in him.
I don't know how long I stood there, pushing emotions onto him, with nothing happening. Lexi and Elena had, by now, taken turns telling their memories; but Stefan seemed cold as ever. He had to be fighting back. His mind was older and more trained than a humans, it made sense. Still, I kept going.
Then, a sliver of something.
I don't know what it was, maybe it was the slight warmth in my hands or the sudden exhaustion washing over me – or the sounds or hysterical sobs coming from somewhere close – that had me come to the conclusion that it might actually have worked.
When I opened my eyes, Elena was on her knees in front of Stefan; holding his face between her hands, gently running her thumb across his cheek.
I looked down at my hands.
They were trembling. Turning them around, palms facing up, I stared at them in disbelief. If that just had worked...
My hands stopped trembling and started shaking. So did my legs, and I grabbed the chair to support myself but I went down anyway.
The first thing I felt was a splitting headache. The second: how heavy my arms were when I tried to move.
I was still in the dark jail, but on the floor and with Elena next to me. Her anxiousness made my heart beat faster.
''What happened?'' I asked, the words heavy on my tongue. It was like someone was sitting on me, preventing air from completely, or at least contently, filling my lungs, and every breath was a struggle.
''Are you okay?'' Elena asked. Her hand went out towards me, but she stopped herself.
''I think so,'' I said, coughed, and sat up. ''Whoa.'' The room spun for a moment, and then settled somewhat.
''I think it worked,'' Elena said. She sounded like she had been crying, and looked and was so happy that it actually seemed to give me a little bit more energy.
''It did?'' I think I smiled. I tried to. Everything was hazy.
''You were out for a while,'' another voice sounded from somewhere in the room. Lexi. ''You should take it easy.''
''No,'' I said, rubbing my temples gingerly. ''I think... I think I have to go find my mum. Go home. I'm... really tired.''
Somehow I managed to get on my feet.
''Ev, let me take you-'' Elena began, reaching out her hand, and I lost my balance, grabbing the thing closest to me.
Elena fell down to the floor in a second.
''What did I do?'' I panicked, almost screaming. ''W-what...''
''She's alive,'' Lexi said, looking at me interestingly. ''I guess what's making you almost pass out made her do it completely.''
''Oh no,'' I groaned. ''I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.''
Lexi steadied me, hands on jacket. ''You think you can find your mother? I'll watch her.'' She threw a look at Stefan. ''And him.'' He was looking at me with worried eyes. Maybe it had worked. Lexi helped me to the door.
The guilt was overwhelming me, and when I stepped outside I was right in the middle of it all again. I think Lexi got someone to look after me, but by then I was too out of it to tell exactly who it was. But it wasn't my mother.
A hand grabbed me, leading me forward. I took a few staggering steps, and I was feeling so much worse than when I'd waken up a few minutes ago.
Something sticky ran down my nose. I almost fell over when I reached up to wipe it off and saw a red smear across my hand.
A voice. Somewhere. Was it close by? I couldn't tell. Blood flowed from my nose, some of it into my mouth; the taste icky on my tongue.
''Ev?'' the voice was right in my ear. I managed to get out a ''hey'' through the pain, when I felt the familiar presence of a friend next to me.
An arm went around my waist. It had to be Sarah. ''Oh my god, Ev, you've got... You don't look too good. You okay?''
''I need,'' I grimaced, ''to find my mum.''
''Yeah,'' she said slowly, ''yeah, of course.'' She led me somewhere, my eyes couldn't focus further then right below my feet.
''You're bleeding,'' Sarah commented.
''Nosebleed.''
'''Ev, if...'' she paused. ''If something happened, you can tell me. You don't have to, but you can.''
I hummed, fighting through the throbbing pain in my head.
Walking through the crowd, I hadn't any strength to keep my mind as my own. When we stopped, Sarah must've been practically carrying me, because I couldn't feel my legs. My mind was floating, clouded.
''Hey, honey,'' I felt a pair of hands on my arms, steadying me, and then I saw her worried face in front of me and I felt a little less stressed. ''What happened?''
''Nosebleed,'' I managed to get out. ''Headache.''
Her hand went to my forehead. ''You're burning up...'' She wiped my nose and mouth with something soft. ''Did she hit her head?'' she asked Sarah, touching it, searching for bumps.
''I don't know,'' Sarah replied. ''I found her like this.''
''Okay, well,'' my mother said. ''Thank you, Sarah. Come on, honey, we need to get you to the hospital.''
The crowd was applauding around us, and just when I thought I couldn't feel any worse, a familiar stab of fear struck me – milliseconds before the sound of a woman screaming echoed across the square. My hand went to my chest, squeezed into a fist.
''Oh my god,'' my mother breathed.
I don't know what had happened, but I could feel it was bad. Chaos began around us. The fear spread from person to person like someone throwing a ball, and soon enough it suffocated me, leaving me on the ground.
''Evangeline.'' I could faintly hear my mother's voice over the nullifying screams of terror that clouded my mind.
''Evangeline,'' my mother begged. ''Come on.'' I had trouble enough breathing, my body twitching in terror.
''Mum,'' I whimpered.
''I know honey,'' she said, grabbed me by the arms and brought me to my feet. I coughed, shaking. A wave of nausea ran over me, forcing me to lean over.
I'm pretty sure my mother all but carried me towards away from it all on her own. Maybe I slipped in and out of it, I don't really know. All I could make out was pain and fear.
The next thing I knew I was lying on something soft. I gripped it weakly with my hand. Grass? No. Maybe?
I could've sworn I'd heard someone say my name.
A sudden jolt, and I was dragged up and suddenly I could make out a face somewhere in front of me. A woman.
I forced myself to focus through the pain and exhaustion – tried to see her more clearly. She was old; her skin crinkled and weathered, her light eyes watery, but kind.
Someone said my name again.
''Evangeline.''
The woman stood still, silent.
''Evangeline.''
''What?'' I gasped, confused as to whether I was seeing things or I just had a concussion.
''I need you to keep awake, okay? There's an ambulance coming.''
Then, my mother was in front of me again and the old woman was gone. I frowned. ''No,'' I said weakly. ''What-''
''That's good, stay with me.''
All I could make out after that was flashing lights, hands going over my body, more pain, and the strange inkling that I was being watched by someone.
There we go. Thank you for reading and reviewing.
