Hi everyone! I'm kind of exhausted, even though I was home and got ready for bed before the clock struck twelve last night, but I wanted to post this today. Hopefully you all had a nice New Year's Eve, if you celebrate it!

Also, I had to update ALL of my chapters, so I hope you didn't get like 40 notifications and only the one for this chapter... (and that I didn't mess it up so it's all in disarray)


Disclaimer: I don't own The Vampire Diaries


We were silent the first half hour. Whenever I glanced at him, he was looking straight ahead at the road in front of us. This was a bad idea. It was supposed to be a chance to get away from everything and just focus on myself for a while – and here I was, inviting him along and practically erasing the chance of me relaxing for even just a moment. At least that's what it felt like right now.

I tried to relax and keep my breathing even. We were almost on the highway, and then I'd have even more time to think. Just highway, all the way over the state line and to Chattanooga were I was supposed to make my first stop. Nothing but highway and me and Elijah cramped together in a car. But I was here, and there wasn't really much I could do about it. Maybe spend some time figuring out something to say.

It bugged me that he was so quiet. Sure, I'd gone along with his idea – but that was exactly what it was. His idea. And he wouldn't let a word out. The stubbornness in me kept quiet partly because of that.

I'd already expressed my anger towards him, somewhat, when I asked him about Elena. And I wanted to bring it up again. I wanted to figure out what he was thinking. And even though friendlier feelings rose to the surface, pushing me towards him, I didn't want to lose sight of my annoyance. Me being an empath and clearly having issues with being too friendly with people shouldn't push away any resentment that was completely justified. Klaus' words rang in my head. Balance.

Checking the rearview mirror, I flinched when a car drove past us at a way too high speed. Not too much thinking, I had to remind myself. I didn't want to die in a car crash.

''I'm sorry,'' Elijah said suddenly.

''You're going to have to be a little more specific,'' I mumbled, making sure to check all mirrors more often.

''For causing you pain.''

His words were like someone punching me in the stomach. Right now, he was so black and white. Either he was apologising, or he was doing something he'd later apologise for. He felt bad, clearly, but he did it anyway. So I wasn't sure how to take his apology.

''Why did you do it?'' I asked.

''You don't know?''

''No, I do. But tell me why.''

He was silent for a moment before he answered in a low voice. ''To protect my family.''

I nodded. ''Exactly. And last time you protected your family, someone innocent died. Same this time.''

Elijah cleared his throat. ''The witch was hardly innocent in this.''

''Okay, fine,'' I said. ''But that's not the point.''

I sighed and leaned back against the seat, debating whether or not to tell him; and then everything just came flowing out my mouth without cease.

''You know why I went on this trip? Because I was sick and tired of all the death. With every trouble that shows, someone dies. I'm tired of people- of people dropping like flies. It's like it goes against everything that I am. I couldn't deal with it. And I guess-'' I drew a breath. ''I guess I went away because despite all of that, I need to learn how to deal with it. No matter how much I hate it.''

His silence was deafening. I shouldn't expect him to have anything to say to my rant, but I had opened myself up more than I was comfortable with. Maybe that was all it was.

''Just... forget I said anything,'' I mumbled and gripped the wheel tighter.

Then it was just the steady hum of the car and the occasional swish of someone overtaking us, for what felt like an eternity. I didn't look at him, and tried to loosen my clenching hands when I saw my knuckles turning white.

''Then why did you let me go with you?'' he asked suddenly, his smooth voice filling the space of the car.

The one thing I'd wondered myself ever since getting back in the car again after he fixed the tire. Why did I let him go with me? It wasn't only because of my good-hearted nature, not only because Elena had asked me to hear him out.

''I'm not sure,'' I said quietly.

We didn't speak after that.

The roadsigns flashed by and I paid little attention to them. I couldn't sit here and mope about not being able to relax when I was the one who invited him, but it was almost impossible to ignore his presence right next to me. And even more infuriating was that I couldn't hide my heartbeat at the times it raced quicker. My inner turmoil had to be clear as day to him.

Then I got a good scare when I checked the speedometer. There was another obvious reminder why I shouldn't drive when upset – I'd passed the speed limit by fifteen. Easing off the gas, I took a deep breath. I had two days to figure out how to relax around him. Two whole days.


It did get easier after a while. Sometime past Roanoke, I stopped thinking and just drove.

But, when my stomach growled for the fifth time I thought it was probably best to exit the highway. If I went much longer without eating, not only would my blood sugar drop but I would probably get irritable and I didn't want him to see me like that.

I pulled off at a rest stop, and parked the car close to some benches. ''I need to eat something,'' I explained, but I'm pretty sure he got that anyway.

We were the only ones there, and I suppose that was for the better. Then there was no use in pretending anything.

I rummaged through my things and got out a lunchbox I fixed up before I left. When I looked up, I saw Elijah stand with his hands in his pockets, looking around.

''I'm sorry,'' I said. ''I don't... have anything for you.''

''You needn't worry,'' he said, looking like he found this amusing. I hadn't meant blood.

''I mean, you can have half my sandwich but-''

''I'm fine,'' he said.

I hummed, reproaching myself for getting so flustered. First I was angry at him, then I became this blabbering mess?

Throwing a glance at one of the benches, I decided against it and paced around while I ate, to get some blood flowing in my stiff legs.

Elijah was standing still by the car. He had his head tilted away from me, so I took the liberty of looking at him longer than I would have otherwise.

I wondered what he was thinking. Why was he hoping to accomplish, coming here with me? Was he just after my forgiveness? Did he really feel that bad? Did our... friendship, mean that much to him?

Once, back when we first started talking, he spoke so casually about people's worth. He'd attributed it to living as long as he had. I looked at the side of his face – the shape of his jaw, how his hair moved in the breeze – and was suddenly overcome by sadness. He claimed to have lived a life where it wasn't possible to see most people as anything but disposable. And somewhere inside of him, that had to hurt. I knew it had to.

He moved his head my way and I quickly looked down. My skin prickled with nervousness, and that had to go away. I didn't know what it was doing there.

When we got in the car again and I'd shut the door, I didn't start the engine right away.

''It must be hard,'' I said.

''What?'' he asked.

''Being alive for so long,'' I said. ''I mean... don't you get bored? You have to take a break from all the pillaging and plundering sometimes, right?''

''The world is ever changing,'' Elijah said. ''We've had our quarrels, but there's always been family.''

He had lived for a thousand years. I had to push aside the absurdity of that, and just think around it anyway. His family had been the one constant under all those years. The only ones who were like him, who would live as long as he would. I tried to understand what that was like, but it was totally beyond my comprehension. I had no idea what he'd been through. What they had to do to survive, because there had to be times when they were threatened – considering how many times that happened in Mystic Falls only. But, in my book, people's past didn't matter as much as their present. And I was trying to understand him. Not condone the horrible actions in his past, not at all. What mattered most was right now.

Right now in this car, where, somehow, Elijah's presence grew again; pushing against me, making me feel like something knocked the air out of my lungs. Our eyes met, and I was sure I forgot to breathe under the intensity of his gaze.

''And,'' he added quietly, ''sometimes, you come across things you've never encountered before.''

I felt my cheeks heat up. Turning away, I hoped he hadn't noticed. Then I started the car.


After driving for three hours both the early morning and everything that happened after that started to catch up with me.

''You should let me drive,'' Elijah commented when I yawned for what felt like the thirtieth time.

I thought to say I was fine, but then I remembered that I had almost crashed once this week. I didn't want to make it a recurring thing.

There was a rest stop a few minutes away, according to the symbol on the GPS. Soon, the signs on the road showed the same thing; and I exited the highway.

As soon as we'd switched and were on the road again, I sank into my seat and relaxed. Driving took more energy out of you than I realised.

Shuffling and stretching out my legs as far as I could, I tried to ignore the warmth lingering from Elijah and the strange feeling of calm that accompanied it.

''I hope you don't mind me asking, but,'' Elijah said, ''where's your father?''

''He passed away when I was little,'' I replied, pressing my feet against the furthest end of the floor.

''I'm sorry.''

''Don't be,'' I said. ''I mean, I wish I'd gotten the chance to know him, but I was too young to understand when it happened.''

''Do you know if he was like you?''

''He wasn't an empath, if that's what you mean.''

He seemed content with that answer. ''I would ask about your father, but I've met him,'' I added.

''Yes,'' Elijah mused. ''My family history is a complicated one.''

I couldn't but agree. And it intrigued me. But, for one; I didn't want to pry, and because I was slowly sinking deeper and deeper into my seat, finally overcome by fatigue.


I jolted awake.

Looking around me, heart beating fast, it took a few seconds before it dawned on me where I was, and who I was with.

''Where are we?'' I asked, straightening up in my seat.

''Knoxville,'' Elijah replied.

I rubbed my eyes. ''How long was I asleep?''

''A few hours.''

It was a good sign, I suppose, that I could fall asleep when he was right there. I held back a yawn and opened the glove compartment to get out a water bottle I'd put there earlier.

''I have a room booked outside Chattanooga,'' I said, taking a drink.

''I could drive the rest of the way,'' Elijah offered.

''No,'' I shook my head. ''No, I couldn't sit that long in a car.'' Also, because I needed time to think. Alone time. ''The GPS is set on the address,'' I added, pointing at the screen. When I saw that there was over an hour left, I wondered how on earth I was going to get through that. I know I thought Elijah went back and forth with his actions, and I seemed to be going down that road, too.

One second, I was comfortable, and the next I struggled to get over what he'd done to Elena. She could forgive him – but I was stuck in purgatory trying to decide where to draw the line.


The hotel wasn't that much to look at. A tall, grey building with a large parking lot right next to it. But it had gotten good reviews. Elijah parked in a free spot and got out of the car with me. While I grabbed my bags, he studied the building.

''I'll meet you here tomorrow morning,'' he said, turning to me. ''Seven?''

''Okay,'' I said, slinging the backpack over my shoulder. ''Good night, then.''

''Good night.''

I walked over the dimly lit parking lot to the hotel, wondering where he was going.

That night, I twisted and turned to make myself comfortable in bed but all I felt was a strange emptiness. I tried to convince myself that I would probably have felt the same if I'd gone alone. That the feeling was in no way connected to Elijah. Still, I replayed parts of our conversations over and over in my head until I finally fell asleep.


It was dark outside when I left the hotel in the morning. I hadn't planned running on this little sleep, but all I could do was try to push that aside and hope to regain some energy when the worst tiredness passed. The cold outside helped me wake up, though, that's for sure. I pulled my jacket closer around me, snuggling into my scarf as best I could.

There wasn't any sign of Elijah yet, but I was a little early. I walked across the parking lot towards the car while digging into my pocket for the keys. When I fumbled with getting them out, I suddenly saw someone walking fast towards me, dressed in dark clothes with a hood up.

Quite a few thoughts passed through my mind the seconds it took the person to get to me. Most of them weren't that nice – and when he aimed something towards me through his pocket one of them turned out to be true.

''Give me your keys,'' a gruff voice spoke. I tried to get a look at his face, but it was shaded in the dark and under his hood.

Maybe it was the shock, that this was the last thing I expected to happen, but I wasn't really scared. Only when the thought crossed my mind that he might actually have a gun under there did cold shivers wash over me as the instinct to flee set in.

''Give 'em here,'' he said again, jabbing at me with whatever he was holding.

''No,'' I said, and tried to keep my hands steady when they started shaking.

He reached out and grabbed my wrist roughly, twisting me closer to him. He slipped the hand out of the pocket and used it to try and force the keys out of my hand.

I didn't think about what to do next. All I knew was that I had to defend myself somehow, so I moved my free hand fast.

At the exact moment my hand touched his he was ripped from me, and Elijah stood there looking with surprised eyes at the man hanging, out cold, in his hands.

His eyes went from me to the mugger and back again. ''You did that?'' he asked.

Of course I couldn't lie. It had to be obvious to him. He didn't do it, and I was the only other one there. Simple as that.

''Yeah,'' I replied and massaged my aching wrist.

Elijah held the man up and studied his unconscious state. I marvelled at how he did it with only one hand. ''He's not dead,'' he stated.

''No, he's just sleeping,'' I said. ''He'll wake up in a while.''

Before I knew it Elijah had the man slung over his shoulder.

''What are you doing?'' I asked, worrying he was about to break him in two or something.

Elijah came out from the bushes and looked at me with is eyebrows raised. ''He's fine,'' he said. ''I thought him laying in the middle of the street might cause suspicion.''

''Oh,'' I paused. ''Yeah.''

I didn't quite know what to say after that, so I found myself standing, shifting my weight between my feet awkwardly and avoiding looking at him. He was the one who spoke first.

''Is sleep as far as your power reaches? Or can you take it further?''

When I met his eyes they were curious. ''What's further?'' I said. ''Coma or death? I have no idea. But I don't think so.''

I grimaced when a sharp sting went through my hand. The adrenaline had overshadowed the pain until now, and I hadn't realised that he grabbed me so hard.

Elijah took a step towards me. ''Is it broken?''

I shook my head. ''No, just bruised. It'll be fine.''

He looked at my cradled hand for a second, and then he suggested we get in the car. He got in the driver's seat before I had even made it to there.

''I can drive,'' I said, while shutting the door.

''I don't doubt it,'' Elijah simply replied, and got the engine running, manoeuvring us out of the parking lot and eventually onto the highway.

A million things were going through my mind. I was partly relieved that he now knew everything about my powers. Even if he hadn't seen all of them in action, at least he knew. I didn't have to worry about keeping them a secret. But I'd also lost an advantage. I hated thinking like that, but it was true. No matter how much I wished I could trust him, we were still far from that.

I watched the landscape through the window. Fields stretching as far as I could see, power lines hugging the horizon. My mother's voice echoed in my head. There's so much world out there. And there really was. But I wasn't really able to appreciate it.

Elijah had been sitting very still the last half hour. In the corner of my eye, I saw him move, and then I heard his voice.

''What's that?'' he asked.

I looked up, and he nodded towards my fingers, folding and unfolding at every animal I spotted grazing.

''Oh,'' I sounded. ''I was just... counting cows.''

He gave me a look I couldn't quite figure out. Thought I was weird, maybe. But when your head felt like it might explode from thinking too much, simple things eased the tension and helped me relax, at least a little bit. There was just too much in my head. I looked at the passing fences and barns and clenched my hands.

''I care too much,'' I blurted out. ''Someone else might've not let you in their car like that, after everything. But I did. Because there is always something in me trying to see the good in people. And I guess I'm trying to... to not think that it's a bad thing. When your surrounded by people who make bad decisions, it's hard to know where to draw a line. Because what I am doesn't really permit me to draw that line.''

I drew a shaky breath and loosened my hands. I hadn't meant to say that. But it felt good.

''I've mad many irremediable decisions,'' Elijah said slowly. ''And I'm grateful you are giving me a chance.''

Turning to look at him, I found him looking right back at me. ''I don't...'' I paused, struggling to find the right words. ''I don't expect anything from you, Elijah.'' It was true. I knew of his past, and of course I hoped that he wouldn't go kill people left and right – but I didn't think I had any right to give him any ultimatums.

Elijah pressed his lips together. ''I do.''

His mouth twitched, giving me an almost imperceptible smile before he turned his eyes back to the road.

''You were concerned I would kill that man,'' Elijah continued after a brief moment of silence.

His voice was level, but his jaw tense. He was upset.

I took a deep breath. ''I suppose I was.''

That couldn't possibly come as a surprise to him. Yes, I was getting back to my old self – but even with seeing the best in people I couldn't ignore actual actions.

While I was trying to come up with something to say, to try to make him understand that I in no way hated him, my phone rang. It was my mother.

Her familiar voice in my ear was like being wrapped in a warm blanket. ''Hi honey! Are you on the road?''

''Yeah, but I've got handsfree,'' I lied.

I didn't think she would mind me being with Elijah, but there would be a problem if she let it slip to someone so that Damon eventually found out. He would freak out. Maybe even come here, if he didn't have anything better to do. So, for his sake, I kept it to myself.

I was acutely aware of that Elijah could hear everything we were saying, but I tried to keep my mind off that.

''So where are you now?''

''We-'' I caught myself saying. ''Well... I just crossed the state line to Alabama.''

''I'm so glad you did this, honey. Doesn't it feel good?''

I glanced at Elijah, who was keeping a straight face.

''Yeah, it's nice.''

''Call me when you get to Lafayette, okay? Or maybe send a text when you rest somewhere.''

''Of course.''

''Love you!''

''I love you,'' I mumbled back and waited a second before I hung up. No matter if I waited, I always managed to hang up before her.

Closing my eyes, I tried to ignore the way my heart clenched missing my mother.

''I get it,'' I said, keeping my eyes shut. ''Why you are so protective of your family. I don't understand why everything has to be so violent, but I get it.''

''You miss her,'' Elijah noted.

''She's...'' I began, opening my eyes again and staring vacantly out the window. ''She's my best friend.''

I knew she knew how to take care of herself. It just... it hurt a little when I realised how far away from her I was, what with everything that had gone down. What if something happened to her while I was gone? What if someone hurt her again? I couldn't come up with any reason for why someone would, but it was Mystic Falls. No matter how peaceful it had been when I left, there rarely was a quiet moment there.

''You are worried something might happen to her?'' Elijah's voice cut through my thoughts.

''Yeah,'' I sighed. ''I know I shouldn't be.''

We fell into silence again, and I bit down on my lip anxiously. ''Do you mind?'' I asked, my finger hovering above the radio.

Elijah shook his head, and I switched it on and went through the channels until I found one I liked.

''You must've heard all sorts of music,'' I realised. ''Well, you know what I mean.''

''Indeed I have,'' Elijah replied.

''What's your favourite?''

''Well,'' he cleared his throat, ''it is common knowledge that rock music twists the minds of the youth... perhaps I should claim that as my favourite.''

It took me a second to realise that he was joking, but when I did, I couldn't hide the smile on my face. He met my smile with one of his own, fleeting ones, and then we started talking about music, moving on to anyone and anything that came up. I think both us us just wanted to fill the silence for a while, the kind of silence that couldn't be beaten by putting on the radio.

Eventually I didn't even think about keeping any kind of guard or wall up.

It fell on its own.


As always, I find myself happy with some parts and not completely with others. Oh well. Let me know what you think!