A/N: I'm sorry. It's been forever since I've updated on this particular story. But my other stories have been doing exceptionally well and I've been working on them more, seeing as people aren't really reviewing on this one anymore. If you would like me to keep writing on this one, leave me a review and I will update.

I Write For Me

Classes had started again seeing as Dumbledore didn't want to let the Death Eaters get the best of their lives. The ministry was on the case and were doing the best they could to remove the unwelcome visitors and perhaps send them all to Azkaban for good.

Draco had found his journal in the library's lost and found when the library was reopened.

Of course that was because Harry and Ron taken it to the bookkeeper claiming it was sitting on one of the tables. Ron was angry for the rest of the day.

September 1st: Journal Entry # 12

I was so relieved to find that my journal had not been taken that when I finally got it back in my possession I did a happy dance outside of the library. Of course this got several snide remarks such as:

"God Malfoy are you that happy that the Death Eaters are attacking the school?"

Bastards! They shall never know the ways of my mind! But for your information, no I am not happy my crazy father has parked his old white arse on the grass at Hogwart's entrance! Why should I be? Seeing as he's not here to have tea with Dumbledore and offer to sign a peace treaty. He's here to burn, pillage, and rape! Well I'm not actually sure as to if he's here for the last item on that short list, because then, not only would he be an evil man, he would be a bloody petifile as well. Is that spelled right? Child molester… whatever. Unless he did it to Professor McGonagall which would be wrong as well.

I worry about mother slightly. I haven't had much time to write to her but I fear she is ashamed of what I have done. Father always told me I was an embarrassment to the family name. Does she feel that way about me as well?

So, I sort of got the Golden Trio stoned last night. None of them had ever smoked wizard cigarettes before! Sadly, I can't remember what we talked about, and in the morning I woke up half naked with a piece of bread in my hand, lying in front of Dumbledore's desk. I can't really say how that came about but it did and Dumbledore just smiled at the four of us his eyes twinkling knowingly…

Alright I admit I'm smoking a wizard's cigarette right now but who am I hurting? I noticed something last night! Granger has boobs! Good sized ones at that! It was when she took off her robes because she was hot.

Nobody cared. Why stop a woman when she wants to get naked?

Anyway, I'm going to stop being crude now and focus…

Malfoy sat there a whole three minutes staring at the page in his journal.

Ah damn it! Who am I kidding! I can't focus on anything right now.

Today Hagrid somehow got into the castle and he brought Dante with him. They put Dante in the stables on the first floor and I went to visit him. I must say I did choose well in picking him for myself. He's the most dutiful beast I have ever laid eyes upon. And magnificent as well. And the best part is, he's only that way with me! And that bloody giant oaf Hagrid as well. But who cares. I must admit that Hagrid does know his subject quite well when it comes to caring for magical creatures. All I know is Dante likes sugar lumps.

Draco chewed on the tip of his quill and got a mouthful of ink. He spat and gagged at the bitter taste of it.

"Oh Lord!" he said hysterically. He jumped up and ran-stumbled into the bathroom, spitting ink everywhere as he went. After he was done cleaning out his mouth as well as he could he looked in the mirror to find his teeth a purplish black color.

He scowled, and his reflection laughed at him.

"That's what you get for being so thick!" the mirror said. Draco rolled his eyes and left the bathroom shutting the door behind him with a snap.

He sat down and attempted to do his potions homework but he was having one of those off days so he put it aside and went down to dinner early.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

That night he sat at the small writing desk to the left of his four-poster bed and wrote his mother a letter.

Dear Mother,

I hope that you are not having any trouble with father these days. I've decided to write now because father is here at Hogwarts trying to get in and terrorize the school. I do hope you're not angry with me for the way I left you that day I was initiated. But I had no choice. It was either leaving, or staying and suffering father's wrath. Which would you have chosen? You know how he is…

I know that I haven't turned out to be the son that you expected you'd have. Strong and well mannered but the truth is, it was never in me to be a Death Eater. And now I am… But I do love you as I hope you still love me as well. I expect I'll be disowned soon and I just want you to know I'm not angry towards you for anything you did. You were nothing but good to me during the time I was being raised. And now of course.

Either that or you hold the same bitterness towards me that father does for my recent behavior. But my decision has been made and I've decided to go against the Dark Lord and father because it is the right thing to do. If you believe in the same cause as I do then write back to me. Tell me what I can do to fight him…and destroy this letter so he can never use it against you. But if you support father, then do what you like with my information. I suppose you tell him everything…

Love from your son,

Draco

Draco sealed the letter tightly so that his mother was the only one who could open it and sent it out with is owl Lucifer. The owl fluttered into the fireplace and looked at Draco expectantly. Draco picked up some floo powder and said:

"Malfoy Manor!"

Lucifer disappeared into the fireplace, his long wings tucked at his sides firmly. Draco sat down in front of the fireplace anxious to see if his mother would reply.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Narcissa was just about to shut down her floo network when her son's eagle owl Lucifer appeared in green flames.

The owl fluttered out and perched on her arm. He hooted in greeting and nipped at her finger as she reached out to retrieve the letter.

"What have you brought me?" she asked expectantly. She took the envelope and opened it. I piece of parchment fell onto the floor, and her sons slanted handwriting was revealed to her. She knelt down quickly and read through it. By the end of the letter, her heart was in her throat and she felt sick.

Yes, what her son was doing was the right thing but… Lucius was her husband.

She took out a piece of parchment and began to write quickly, hoping that Draco would be waiting for a reply.

My beloved son,

I must say I am torn. My love for you is strong and the bond between your father and I has been dwindling away to nothing. I barely know him anymore! I do believe that Voldemort needs to be demolished and I will help you all that I can. But there are no promises on my end for your father does not tell me a thing about his activities. If you must know, his one true weakness has always been you.

Believe me when I say he loves you. You are his son and a wonderful young man. How could he not? But he will stop at nothing to achieve his goals therefore meaning if you are in his way, Draco you will pay. Perhaps you should pretend to support the Dark Lord for the time being. Perhaps you should write him a letter to tell him it is so…And maybe his anger will die away… Think carefully my son. The true Malfoy inside of you is cunning. I have faith you will find a way.

Love forever and always your mother,

Narcissa

She gave Lucifer a kiss and tied the letter to his talon after sealing it. He then returned into the fireplace where she said firmly:

"Hogwarts, Slytherin common room, Draco Malfoy," and she threw down the powder, making Lucifer disappear.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lucifer came out of the fireplace looking a bit dusty and he stuck out his leg to Draco who was sitting anxiously waiting. Draco smiled brightly and picked up his owl, setting him to perch on Draco's knee. When he read his mother's letter he found he was beginning to feel hope for what was to come. If he could indeed fool his father into believing he was a true Death Eater at heart, perhaps they could find means to destroy Voldemort.

Maybe, there was hope for his father as well.

A/N: Okay… so leave me a review! Hope you liked this chapter. I know it's been ages since I've reviewed but perhaps there are still people reading this story… Anyway, I've got to go. I will be looking out. And when you review, I will write more.