Title: Woo Me With Words (11?)
Author: Dea Brynhild Ensomhet Spikess
Timeline: "Sleeper", Bs7, with a few changes. I'm not sure how close to canon I'll be sticking in the future... although there are a few canon things I'm changing i.e. Spike (and now maybe Xander?) being able to touch the First, the First taking Xander's shape, and Jesse's return (is it really Jesse, or is it the First? Mwahahahaha...). Keep reading, and I'll eventually explain why these things are possible. Oh yeah, and that whole Buffy/Spike rape thing? Never happened.
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Spike/Xander
Disclaimer: Don't own any of the Buffy cast/crew/characters/plotlines/etc. Several lines of dialogue are taken directly from the episode "Sleeper". I write the opening poems, so blame me if they suck. The info in the yearbook is taken from the "The Sunnydale High Yearbook", but the signed quotes were made up by me.
Feedback: is craved. It's a drug. They could market FB in a pill form and it would probably become the most abused drug ever. You always want more of it. But alas, it's not condensed into a pill, which is probably good since I'd spend all my money on it and not be able to pay for food. So here, I am, enduring my muses and forcing another chapter out in hopes of comments. Feed my addiction.
Author's Notes: It is cold at work. I put up with it during the winter, 'cause I figured it was related to how freezing it was outside, but now it's hot and humid outside and it's still freezing in the back of the store. It sucks, and my fingernails are turning purple. It's hard to concentrate on Spander when you're mistyping with numb fingers.
Warning: Unbetaed, so point out mistakes and I'll fix 'em Constructive crit is welcomed.

"""

Chapter 11: All I can do is read a book to stay awake, and it rips my life away but it's a great escape.

Watching Me Fall

Not quite in love yet, still
Stepping up to the precipice.
You were sprawled unconscious
On the bed that had been hers.

Could smell you, recognized you,
Sire's gift left unclaimed.
Wanted to lick a trail,
Consume your essence,
Mark you as mine.

Still wouldn't admit it yet
So I distracted myself
With yet another truce,
Death an arm's breadth away
Without the world at stake.

It was only years later
I realized that, when I
Thought of the world's
Benefits, I pictured you.

"""

His own heartbeat sounded ridiculously loud in Xander's ears. "Me?" he squeaked, realizing suddenly how he must look. He hadn't bothered putting on any socks or shoes when he woke up, and with his shirt in a crumpled blood-stained ball on the floor, all he had left on was his jeans and underwear. Spike nodded slowly from where he was stretched out in bed, his half-lidded eyes hardly blinking. The edge of the sheet flirted around Spike's shoulders, and the hint of collarbone served as more distraction than Xander could handle.

"I'm here..." Xander trailed off, his sluggish mind a blank. He couldn't say that he was looking around for proof that Spike had gotten his bite back, but he couldn't think of any other reason to explain why he was sneaking around Spike's room. Why hadn't he thought up an excuse before going in? "Obviously..." Xander stalled for time. Think, dammit, think! But all he could think about was that Spike was probably naked under that sheet, which in no way helped the situation. The fact that he didn't know why he was thinking about Spike naked just made him more confused. Distracted as he was, Anya's words echoed in his head and were out of his mouth before he could stop them, "...for sex?"

Spike's eyes opened in surprise and he quickly sat up, the sheet falling down to his waist. Xander couldn't breathe for a moment, flash of a sense memory as he remembered the alley and the desire that had spread through him when he ran his hands over that chest. His gaze traveled down, past dusky nipples to well-defined abs, to Spike's lap where the fabric pooled and hid what was underneath. "Beg pardon?" Spike choked out, and Xander's gaze returned to his face. Wide blue eyes stared at him as if he'd just announced that vampires now ruled the world and all the humans agreed to be happy meals.

Xander itched to take back the words, but they'd been said and there was no way he could retract them without a long, messy, and possibly quite embarrassing explanation of the Freudian slip. Now that the words were out, though, a really bad idea was quickly turning into a stupid, horrible plan. Xander gathered his courage for a moment before putting the really bad stupid horrible plan into action. "You and me. Here and now." He knelt on the edge of the bed at Spike's feet and began to crawl up the bed. If he could act so outrageously un-Xandery, then Spike would have to be convinced that this had all been a weird dream, because there would be no way in Hell that Xander would waltz into his room and demand sex in the middle of the day. And even if Spike did tell someone, who would believe him? Spike was certifiably insane, so no one would believe anything that came out of his mouth. Xander's voice took on the edge he'd used to win that phone-sex operator job, low and husky with a hint of you-know-you-want-me-so-don't-even-bother-trying-to-deny-it. "Been wanting you, Spike." Xander continued to crawl up the bed. Spike started to pull back, stopping when he realized that the sheet wasn't going to reach very far and if he kept moving back he'd reveal a bit more than he wanted to. "Let's get it on." Xander almost gagged on the cheesy words falling out of his mouth. If all else failed, he could always blame it on the big bad that was coming. Or possession. Maybe possession by the coming big bad? And it had to be a sign of the warpedness of his brain and residual jacket love-spell madness that made the words "coming" and "big bad" evoke a very naughty image of Spike...

"What are you-" Spike hushed as Xander pressed a finger to his lips.

"Shh." Xander didn't want Spike to start thinking and figure out that this wasn't a dream. The less time he gave him to fully wake up, the better. "No questions. No talking." Xander drew close to Spike, who was leaning as far away as he could without losing the cover of the sheet. "I can't stop thinking about you and me and that kiss in the alley." He was surprised at how easily the words slipped out, as if he really had planned them in advance. Xander reached up a hand, and Spike flinched as he caressed the side of Spike's face. Xander frowned. Spike looked scared and utterly freaked out, which was not a response he'd been expecting. Dismissive and insulting? Sure. Interested and horny? Possibly. But not this icy fear that was crystallizing in blue eyes. "Can't stop wanting this." His gaze flickered down to Spike's mouth, and the spark of lust that shot through him caught Xander by surprise. Shoving away any hesitation, Xander surged forward and pressed his lips to Spike's, his hand slipping behind Spike's head to pull him closer. Spike moaned and gave in to the kiss for a moment, mouths clashing as fiercely as they had in the alley.

Jacket be damned, because unless someone had spelled his jeans without telling him, Xander had no excuse for what he was doing. Couldn't explain why Spike's lips were suddenly the best he'd ever kissed, or why he'd never noticed his lips before, like water that is so bland and boring that you don't think about it until it's a hot day and you're sweating to death and a cool glass of water is suddenly heaven as it caresses your tongue and slips down your throat... Damn, Spike could kiss, and the very notion that it was Spike that he was kissing was at once perfect and so very wrong, because they'd been hating each other for years but Spike had apparently been writing love poems to him for years and it was all so very confusing and the kissing really was only making it harder to think and it was all too much too soon... Xander was about to jerk away, but Spike beat him to the punch. Pushing Xander away from him hard, Spike scrambled away from him, sheet and all sense of modesty - and apparently sanity - forgotten as Spike fell off the bed and kept scrambling back until he was scrunched down in a corner of the room, back against the wall and legs drawn up into a fetal position. Spike was rocking back and forth and shivering, eyes wide and glazed and refusing to look in Xander's direction. Xander climbed off the bed and took a step closer, but Spike recoiled away as far as was physically possible, slamming his shoulder into the wall.

Xander stilled, and Spike resumed his rocking. Xander could just barely hear him chanting, "Not real. Not real. Can't touch it. Not real. Not Xander. Can't touch it. Not real."

Xander tried to take other step forward, but Spike recoiled again, squeezing his eyes shut and pressing himself into a smaller target flush against the wall. Extremely worried at this point, Xander tried backing away from Spike a few steps, which seemed to help a little. Spike was still rocking but the shivering had slowed a little and the chanting was getting quieter. With reluctance, Xander gathered up the dirty mugs and his shirt and left the room, shutting the door behind him. He didn't know what to do, but it was obvious his presence was sending Spike straight back into crazyville.

Anya and Jesse looked up as he left Spike's room, and Anya quirked her eyebrow at the shirt in his hands. "Don't even ask." Xander muttered quietly. He dumped the mugs in the kitchen sink and left them to soak, before retreating to his own bedroom again.

"Am I missing something?" Jesse wondered out loud, glancing between Spike's and Xander's closed doors.

"Probably." Anya replied. "Maybe not. It's hard to say." She picked up the yearbook and stood, about to put it away when Jesse caught sight of it.

"That's that?"

"The Sunnydale High yearbook." Anya replied.

Jesse held out a hand, "Can I see it?" Anya gave it to him and sat back down, resuming her channel surfing. Jesse absently stroked the cover of the yearbook, fingertips tracing the upturned faces and raised letters. He opened the cover and began to read the messages penned inside. A few he was expecting but several were a surprise.

Xander! Beware of Dingos! They're baby-eaters, man! Arooor! - Devon

Xander, When I moved to Sunnydale I was afraid that I would be friendless and unpopular, Thanks for sticking by me through all the you-know-what stuff. Popularity isn't all it's cracked up to be - I'd rather be one of the Scoobies. - Buffy
P.S. Thank you for saving my life.

Xan, Can you believe it? We graduated! I can't wait till college starts! Yeah, I know, I'm a geek. ) There were a few times when I was being sucked into the floor or kidnapped by Spike or Faith that I wasn't sure we'd make it to this day, but now we have! No more Cordettes or Snyder or any of those other poop-heads! We're free! The world is ours! - Willow

Xander, We haven't been able to tolerate each other even on our best days, but I've always respected you. Buffy's lucky to have a friend as loyal as you. Watch out for her. - Angel

Xander, It wasn't all bad, but most of it was. Still, I'm glad we had a few moments together before you betrayed me and indirectly caused me to be impaled and greatly lowered my chances of getting a bikini endorsement. When I'm a big star in L.A. this autograph will be worth more money than you'll get paid in a week. I look forward to that day. - Cordelia Chase

I know nobody talks about it when kids go missing, but I just wanted to say - Jesse and I used to hang out sometimes. He was cool. I miss him. - Hogan M.

Xander, When you and Willow found out about Buffy's destiny and decided to help, I didn't think it was a good idea. I have never been happier to be wrong in my life. You've grown into a fine man, and it's been a pleasure to know you. - Giles

Xander, Thanks for standing up for me that time at the zoo. Getting eaten by a hyena would have really sucked. - Lance

I w--h you would have come with me. Try not to get killed. - Anya

Grams said she'd be happy to set you up if you're interested - her taste in guys really isn't that bad. I can't believe I didn't come out sooner! Thanks for being there and listening, Harris. - Larry

Alexander Harris, Good luck in your future career endeavors. I hear Hotdog Hut is hiring. - Principal Snyder.

Wondering what happened to Principal Flutie, Jesse turned the page.

"""

TBC...