Life is no bed of lilies

Disclaimer: You know, when I say I own nothing but the idea in this story, I really mean it! Surprised? You should be…

Chapter 2: The Art of Forgery

Many at Hogwarts were aware of Lily Evans's achievements. Those who were fond list-makers had created, of all things, a list of her many attributes. The list often looked something like this:

Lily Evans was a studious girl who strove for the highest in any subject possible. Yes, this included the detested Divination, in which she and the oaf Sirius Black had been paired together by a rather dim-witted professor.

She was Head Girl, and shared a common room with James Potter. Honestly, if this was considered an attribute, then Lily would be perfect by now!

The top Potions student at Hogwarts. Really, the red hair must have caught Professor Slughorn's attention immediately.

Lily's wicked sense of humour. Oh yes, how could one forget the time when she had 'accidentally' cast a glamour spell over Potter during a Gryffindor party, causing him to look like Dumbledore, when he in fact had wanted to look like his favourite Quidditch player? Needless to say, the boy had been humiliated beyond belief!

The list was far longer than this, of course. The one thing that most people overlooked, or simply failed to realise, was the fact that Lily was really the master of forgery. There could be no other better forger in the whole castle, and this was one talent that Lily treasured, for without this 'talent', how could she truly repay the Head Boy for his many wicked tricks?

Oh, life without forgery would be boring indeed!

"You know, Padfoot, in a world dominated by men, you could probably pass off as an intelligent person. In this world where equality reigns, though, you'd most likely be one of the thicker specimens," Remus explained to his shaggy-haired friend.

Spinning around with a bewildered expression, Sirius finally stopped and stared at Remus.

"You think I'm fat? I don't think I'm fat!" he exclaimed, shocked at the mere thought of it.

"That only proves my point, Sirius," Remus said tiredly, hitting his forehead continuously.

"Moony, have you looked in the mirror lately? You're not that skinny, you know," James told his friend condescendingly. Sirius and Peter nodded their heads solemnly in agreement.

"Not you as well, James!" Remus moaned, an anguished look masking his complacent features. Looking at Peter's repetitive bobbing-of-the-head, he wisely decided not to comment on the overall intelligence of the Marauders.

James sat himself down next to Remus and looked about the Gryffindor common room, complete with its plush cushions and couches. With a yawn, he inwardly wondered why they were studying History on such a fine and beautiful Saturday. In his opinion, the Quidditch pitch was there for a reason, and when combined with sunlight, made his life that much better.

As he cupped his chin with his hands, James heard the approaching voice of his Lily flower, speaking to none other than Frank Longbottom! Immediately, he sat up, his attention riveted on the redhead, who was currently immersed in a long and, in James's opinion, rather interesting conversation with Frank. Using his superior listening skills, James managed to catch several of the words being said.

"…oh, please, Frank! You know how much it means to me!"

"I dunno, Lils. It's an awful lot to ask of a bloke…" At this, Frank's volume dipped quite suddenly, resulting in a rather hurried whisper.

As Frank and Lily stepped through the portrait door of the common room, Lily's face reddened quite dramatically. This was followed by a rather loud exclamation from the Head Girl.

"Frank Longbottom! How could you think that? I'm only asking you to…"

The poor boy quickly covered his friend's mouth with his hand while waving worriedly to the Marauders. All four waved back, uncertain of what was going on.

"Uh, hi James! Remus, Sirius, Pete, how are you?" Without waiting for an answer, Frank dragged Lily up the set of stairs and into the boys' dormitory.

Staring at one another with rather bewildered expressions, the Marauders returned to their respective duties, oblivious to Lily's intent.

The next morning, James stumbled blearily into the Great Hall, not quite ready to begin his day. He sat himself down with a highly audible thump and began shoving porridge down his throat, unaware that he could quite possibly cause himself indigestion problems. The Head Boy and proud Quidditch captain slowly came to the realisation that many pairs of eyes were staring at his beautiful face.

"What?" he spluttered, porridge flying out everywhere. Those closest to him shielded themselves from the impending World War III attack, their attention thus being immediately detracted from him.

James looked around, his tired eyes scanning the sea of people surrounding him. His gaze rested upon a very familiar looking rose, and his eyes travelled up the rose, to meet Peter's round face.

"What!" yelled a now fully wide-awake James, springing up from his seat.

"Lookit that, Moony. Doncha reckon Prongs is sounding a lot like a girl nowadays? I mean, what with yelling and then jumping up straightaway, and then giving a rose and love letter to Wormtail! Hahhhahaaa…" Sirius exclaimed loudly, trailing off into laughter. Remus unsuccessfully tried to prevent himself from grinning, whereas Peter was constantly wiping the tears of joy from his face.

"James! I don't believe it! Do you really mean it? You love me with all your heart? I'm so touched!" Without giving James a chance to recover from his initial shock, Peter leapt at the bespectacled boy, knocking him slightly off balance.

James awkwardly patted his fellow Marauder on the back, while detaching himself from said Marauder's tight embrace. He never ceased his roving-of-the-eye, though. Snatching the attached letter from the rose, James ripped it open, eager to find out whom to exact his revenge upon. Imagine his immense surprise when he found himself staring at his own handwriting, in these exact words:

Dear Peter,

There are no words that can express how I feel for you. Therefore, in high hopes of your reciprocation of my feelings, I present you with a gift I hold most dear to my heart. May you forever cherish and love this rose, as I love you.

Yours truly,

James Potter

With a confounded expression on his face, James looked up from the letter, only to be met with a pair of startlingly familiar eyes, accompanied by a smirk. He cocked an eyebrow in response and walked away from the Great Hall, utterly humiliated yet impressed. Who would have thought she had it in her? James could understand if it had been any other person. Sirius, Remus, Pete, Malfoy… hell, even Crabbe and Goyle! But Evans? Never!

Okay guys, you know the deal. PLEASE REVIEW… I like it when people review. Obviously, I'm not too happy when they don't. So make a happy girl, won't you? That way, I won't need to resort to extreme acts of violence. My friends would know. Not that I'm meaning to scare you at all…