Disclaimer- I don't own the Naruto franchise nor its characters.
What would Rin think of him now?
The question that never truly left his mind comes to the forefront of his conscience again. That's if a genocidal maniac has any semblance of conscience in the first place.
Since that's what he had become.
A Maniac. Murderer. Traitor. Madara. Tobi.
Little to nothing remains of his old name and personality, the one Rin would recognize. The one she once could call a friend. Obito Uchiha was gone, and so was his forsaken legacy. The one who used to be called an idiot. The black sheep of his clan. A sorry excuse of a shinobi. A disgrace to the Hidden Leaf. The weak link of an otherwise brilliant Team Seven.
But it never was like him to care for what the others may think of him.
In his vision, the only characteristic that could describe his past life was just how much of a fool he was. To believe in peace in a war-torn shinobi world. To believe in justice, in a chaotic and unruly land. But most of all, to believe in hope that such a situation could ever end.
It could not. He learned that the hard way.
And the cost of his foolishness? He had lost everything in his previous life. His rival. His sensei. His only friend.
And so, Rin was never coming back just as much as Obito never was. Both victims of the war and destruction know as the shinobi system.
She was not coming back.
So why did her opinion matter even to his disturbed new persona and life?
It didn't. He had accepted that already. A dead Rin is no Rin whatsoever, so a dead Rin's possible opinion on him is something absurd to even think about.
At least, that's what he told himself every day.
He could never truly forget her, not even in the darkest corners of his mind, the place where he retreated to every time his "Madara" or Tobi persona needed to get out, he could still remember the warmth or the kindness he never deserved but still received from her, the flowers he could never amount the courage to give her, the happiness he always got when she talked to him, and finally, the feeling of being acknowledged by someone.
She was able to look past his flamboyant attitude, the tardiness, his failures as a shinobi, his bitterness towards Kakashi.
The only part she thankfully never saw was the overbearing sadness he felt whenever he saw the gleam in Rin's eyes while she looked at Kakashi.
But in the end, everyone at best just looked at the Uchiha, Rin was the only one who saw Obito.
And after having such a pitful thought demonstration of his old weakness, maybe his past life as the idiot boy didn't fully end after all, he still was a fool for remembering and grieving over something so pathetic as a childhood crush.
But was it just that?
He could feel that he already had the answer to that, deep somewhere in his mind, but wherever it was now, he chose to forget it in his guilt.
Even so, he could never truly deserve her anyway, he would be satisfied if she ended up with Kakashi. As long as she was happy, he would be happy for her.
That's surprisingly uncharacteristic for a childhood crush, isn't it?
It doesn't matter. Nothing matters. He had become something far worse than the boy who vowed for her affection. And Kakashi had killed her.
Of course, he knew better than to blame him and lose his life in useless revenge, the fault was with the world and system, not the individuals that grappled with the harsh reality of war they were presented.
That's why he still vows to create a world where no pain could be felt, where all tragedy is eliminated and people can live their ideal lives.
The still alive Kakashi could go back to their childhood time at the Academy, this time without the looming threat of war or the traumatic death of his father. He could fully indulge himself in humiliating the despised Uchiha boy and become one of the village's best shinobi. Minato and Rin would be there to congratulate him, and the Obito kid he used to know could also be there to scowl at his accomplishment.
As for the actual Obito, he would never deserve such a prospect.
It would be so easy to delude himself into thinking that such an illusion was possible for him as well. To look to his sensei's joyful and full of pride face, to see Kakashi openly grimacing at his tardiness, and seeing once again the smile Rin used to give him.
But he knew, that the moment he looked into their faces, he wouldn't be able to see the illusion. He would see only the Rin with a hole in her heart, Kakashi with a Chidori through her, and Minato's blood-filled face after he had unleashed the Kyuubi that eventually killed him and Kushina.
That's the price he was already paying for the Infinite Tsukuyomi, he would never truly see the benefits of it on himself. Overall, a price he was more than willing to pay if it meant the rest of the world could get their disgrace-free existence.
But that wasn't the full price either, was it?
His home, Konoha, having constantly been destroyed by his hand or that of Nagato's.
Minato and Kushina's son having to grow up an orphan.
Was that all factored in the price he was willing to pay?
At this point, he would never know, the deeds were done, he was a murderer and a traitor, of his sensei nonetheless.
But he would make sure the cycle would end with him so that no more puppets would be needed or manipulated by Madara's machinations.
The kind-hearted and optimistic Obito Uchiha was gone, so now he was very well aware he had no ally in the forgotten and decrepit Uchiha, he was just a piece in the old man's diabolical plan. A plan he didn't trust, since he wouldn't put past him to sabotage his plans from beyond the grave.
But Madara's scheme lives on since their endgame was still supposedly the same. Still, he would be damned before all the murder and destruction caused would be used for purposes outside his Infinite Tsuyukomi.
And at this stage, he could hardly think of someone able to stop the plan altogether. Naruto Uzumaki had certainly been a nuisance, especially after Nagato's blunder, but he was by no means close to the power needed to stop him or his future army. Maybe, if the chance arose before the end of it all, he could even convince him of the true nature of the world, to make him see beyond the fitful dreams of becoming Hokage or impressing his friends.
But now, it was time to get ready for the Five Kage meeting. No amount of dwelling on his past would help his plan after all. He didn't have a heart in him to care for such emotions or weaknesses.
His heart had been struck by a Chidori.
So, what would Rin think of him now?
He didn't want to know.
He could never truly bear to know it.
This is my first fanfiction and I'm not a native English speaker, any criticism is very much welcome.
Thanks for reading.
