Tuesday after work, Goren entered his apartment, surprised to be greeted by dinner smells. "Eames?"

Eames and Emily both peeked out of the kitchen to say hi, quickly returning to what they were doing. He took off his jacket and draped it over the back of the easy chair. Untying his tie and opening the top few buttons of his shirt, he walked to the doorway and watched them busy themselves with dinner.

Eames pulled out three plates, piling on the silverware and thrusting them at him. "Here. Set the table."

He raised his eyebrows and smiled, turning toward the table. As he finished with the last place setting, Emily came out and sat down. Leaning toward her, he touched her arm. "Are you ok? You look a little pale."

"I'm ok. I've just overdone it a little."

"Overdone what? Last month you were carrying a seventy-pound pack through the Rocky Mountains and now..."

She touched his lips lightly with her fingertips. "Shhh. I know."

He eased himself down onto the chair beside her, frowning deeply. "What's wrong?"

Eames came out of the kitchen, stopping behind him and resting her hands on his shoulders, squeezing. "After dinner, ok?"

"Eames..."

She leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Please," she whispered in his ear.

He closed his eyes. "Eat fast."

The dinner was good, but he had a rock in the middle of his gut that effectively killed his appetite. He forced himself to eat some, but he couldn't force himself to finish. Eames cleared off the table and returned to her seat. Goren looked from one to the other. He had fully connected the dots by now and his face betrayed his apprehension. "What's going on?"

Emily looked at Eames, who nodded at her. She sighed and turned back to him. "Last month, I was still feeling strong and healthy. My doctor nearly had a cow when I told him that I was going to spend a week hiking in the Rockies alone, but it was something I'd always wanted to do and I couldn't postpone it any longer or chances were I would never get to do it. He said my condition could begin to deteriorate at any time and I was taking a huge chance, but it was my chance to take. And I stayed a little longer than I intended, to be with you. But I still felt good. I was at the top of my mountain, Bobby. Not long after I returned home, I began a rapid descent down the other side. My strength began to fail and my stamina all but left. He said it could be a fast decline, but I expected months, not weeks. It's unpredictable. It could have happened in Colorado, and I would have died up there...but that would have been okay, because I loved it there." She sighed. "I have always been active and healthy. I've done really well. Not even my co-workers knew I was sick because I never looked sick. But that's going to change very soon. I'm starting to lose more weight now, and I can feel it all sliding away...my health, my stamina, my life..."

Eames watched his face, but she couldn't interpret his expression. He swallowed. "Um, what is it?"

"Stage IV metastatic ovarian cancer, inoperable. I had no symptoms at all. I developed pneumonia just after Christmas; that's how they found it. By that time, it had metastasized to my liver, my lungs and my lymph nodes."

"And your treatment?"

She shook her head. "After three chemo treatments, I said no more. I'm not stupid; I know there's no hope. I decided it wasn't worth it to make myself so sick and waste the time I had left. I would rather feel good and do what I want to do. All I was doing with the chemowas squandering the healthy time I had left to prolong the time I would be in pain and feeling bad. I have chosen to live well in the time I have left and hope the end will be fast."

He leaned back in his chair and studied her. Then he shifted his gaze to his partner. "How long have you known?"

"Emily told me maybe two weeks ago."

"And you didn't tell me..."

"Because Emily asked me not to."

He looked back at Emily. "I don't want pity."

He frowned. "You think I would pity you?"

"Listen to me. This has been a wonderful visit. There have been no awkward silences or uncomfortable moments. That's what I wanted to avoid. You treated me the same way you did in Colorado, and that was what I wanted from you. I don't want to be treated with kid gloves. I want you to remember this visit fondly, the way I will, without an ominous cloud hanging over it. I didn't want to tell you...but Alex said it was best if we did. She wanted you to hear it from me, now, before I leave, rather than from her in six months after I die."

He looked at Eames, then back at Emily. He shifted back to Eames. "Why did you invite her to visit?"

"Because I wanted to meet her, just like I told you. I didn't know she was sick when I invited her."

Again, his gaze shifted back and forth. He had no idea even how to process what he'd just been told. Emily reached toward him, taking his hand. "I've come to terms with this. I've had a good life. You don't mourn a life well-lived, Bobby. I want you both to remember me with a smile."

He looked back and forth from one to the other, pulling away from her. "You should have told me. One of you should have told me." He slammed his hand on the table and got up.

"Bobby.."

He held up a hand. "No, Eames. I...I need to think."

He crossed the apartment and left, slamming the door. Eames shook her head; Emily frowned. "Where is he going?"

"He'll walk around for a little while, and then he'll call Mike."

"Why Mike?"

"Because Mike can give him the one thing I will never be able to."

She got up and went into the kitchen to clean up. Emily followed her to help. "What's that?"

"Another guy's opinion."

"Ah... Will he be okay?"

"Eventually. Bobby doesn't handle loss well."

"So I gathered."

Eames kept her attention focued on the dishes in the sink so Emily wouldn't see the tears that welled up in her eyes...tears she would only let Bobby see.

---------------------------------------------------

Logan climbed onto a barstool and signaled for a drink. "Ok, I'm here. What the hell is going on?"

"Remember I told you I thought something was wrong?"

"Yeah, and I told you it was all in your head."

"You were wrong."

"Oh? So what's up?"

"Um, Emily's dying."

Logan stared at him. "What?"

"She...uh, she doesn't have much time left."

"Is that why Eames invited her? To say good-bye?"

"No. Eames didn't know. She just wanted to meet her. But Emily told her before she came and so Eames was bent on making this a great trip for her."

"And part of that...was you?"

"I guess."

"I don't get it."

"You think I do?"

Logan watched him finish off his drink and motion to the bartender. "Bobby, this won't help."

"It'll fuckin' help me."

"It'll get you hung over. Come on, man. Let's go someplace else."

"Mike..."

"You aren't gonna do this to yourself, or to them."

"Them?"

"Come on, genius."

Reluctantly, Goren dropped a few bills on the bar and slammed back his last drink. Then he followed Logan out of the bar.

------------------------------------------

Logan watched him as they headed down the street, trying to gauge how many he'd had before he got there, but he couldn't tell. It was a few, he knew. "So let's start at the top here. Emily's sick?"

Goren nodded. "Cancer."

"And she's dying?"

"Yeah. It's very advanced and it spread. There's no hope."

"So she went hiking?"

"Before she got too sick to manage it, yeah."

"And now?"

"It's progressing quickly."

"How much longer does she have?"

"A few months, at most. Probably less."

"And that's why Eames has been throwing you at her?"

"I don't know! I haven't talked to Eames yet. I just...had to get out of there."

"It's not contagious, you know."

He ducked when Goren swung an arm at him. "I know that. I, uh, I was mad and I needed to get away."

"Mad at who?"

"At them, for not telling me."

"Why should they have?"

That stopped him. Actually, he didn't have any right to be told. Granted, he felt they should have told him, but that didn't necessarily translate to they had to tell him. "I...just think they should have."

"Because you don't like being left in the dark. That's why you got mad." He sighed. "Let's go back to Colorado. What happened there? Really. Because she's in love with you, Bobby. She all but admitted that much. What about you? And don't cop out of it by saying you're in love with Eames. I know that. And I know you care about Emily. That's obvious. Is there anything else?"

"There can't be."

"That wasn't my damn question."

Goren was quiet for another half a block. "Ok, yeah...I...I fell for her. But..."

"No buts. You answered my question. How far'd you get with her?"

"Not far. She...she knew how I felt about Alex. She stopped me before I had a chance to go far...every time."

"Because she didn't want you, or because she knew she was dying?"

"I don't know."

"If she'd given you the green light, would you have hit the brakes? Be honest with me."

"I...uh, no. N-no, I wouldn't have."

"Then you came back home and worked it out with Alex...but you still thought about her, and you called her...couldn't let her go. Right?"

"Yeah."

"And since she's been here? Is the attraction still there?"

"Yeah, it is."

"And that's why you've been hanging around at work while your partner's off. Why you spent the weekend with me instead of with them."

"What else was I supposed to do? I was just biding my time until she goes home and then it'd be okay."

"But now...that's changed?"

"No. But...I...shit, man, she's dying."

Logan was getting annoyed. "So what do you want? A pity fuck?"

Logan never saw it coming. Goren hit him, hard, and he hit the ground. He looked up at him. "Ok, that was stupid." He wiped the blood from his mouth. "Sorry. I'll take that as a no."

"I will not risk losing Eames for anyone. Don't ever forget that again."

"Ok, I get it." He got up from the ground. They continued down the street. He watched Goren clench and unclench his fists. "Calm down. She's probably not up to having sex any more anyway. She's leaving when? Tomorrow?"

"Yeah. Her flight leaves at four."

"So what are you going to do?"

"Take tomorrow off."

"And?"

"Spend it with her and Eames."

Logan sighed. "Um, call us and let us have lunch with you. You know, so Barek and I can say good-bye."

"Yeah, ok. I, um, I'm going home."

"Want me to walk with you?"

"No. Go on home. Thanks for coming and for talking to me."

"Sure. But next time I say something stupid, don't punch me."

"I...sorry. But you were out of line."

"I live outside the line, man. That's how I ended up on Staten Island for ten years."

Goren lightly punched his shoulder. "Good night, Mike."

Logan watched him cross the street and turn the corner. He wasn't sure he'd helped matters any, but with Goren, you never knew.