Just Listen
Ever since the scene in the car, Owen had been extremely happy in regards to my music tastes. I had at least 6 CDs he had burned me since, just to see if I liked them. I still hadn't finished the stack. I had only listened to 1 so far. Other things were on my mind.
Especially the talent show, which was Saturday. That meant I would have 4 days to practice my song. 4 days until I sang in front of all of Lakeview. My stomach did a flip-flop. I was so nervous.
"Oh, Annabel. You're nervous? You used to do modeling, for crying out loud!" Clarke flipped through the lyrics for the song I had chosen. Why did everyone just assume I wouldn't be nervous?
"But this is different," I protested. Coming back to the rule Kirsten had put down months prior. "This is more personal."
Clarke sighed and turned off the CD. We had listened to Black Roses Red on repeat for about an hour now. "Okay, give it a go," she handed me the lyrics and sat back down on the couch in our living room.
"Can
I ask you a question please
Promise you won't laugh at me
Honestly
I'm standing here
Afraid I'll be betrayed."
Clarke sat up, cupped her hands under her chin, and listened. My voice wasn't so great after I ate, who knew why. I wasn't sure what she was thinking. So I continued on.
"As
twisted as it seems, I only fear love when it's in my dreams
So
let the morning light come in and let the darkness fade away
Can
you turn my black roses red?
Can you turn my black roses red?"
After I finished, I breathed in deeply and went to the kitchen for a water bottle. I wasn't used to singing under such pressure. I was used to singing in the shower, or humming along with the radio in the car. And for a moment, all of my hope fell. What had I been thinking? I wasn't a singer. I was being something I wasn't.
But when I turned around to tell Clarke the emotions I had just experienced, I stopped. I noticed a figure in the doorway. It was my mother. She was smiling, her eyes glossy with tears. She slowly walked over and put her arms around me, whispering over and over how proud she was; how talented I was. And at that point, that's what kept me going. I didn't want to let my mother down. I loved seeing her happy.
The whole afternoon I practiced. I sang until my voice started to squeak, causing my mother to jump up and announce a take out dinner. She rushed over the phone, dialing a pizza place at random, and ordered.
The door rang half an hour later and Clarke went to get it.
"Owen! How are you?"
My eyes grew wide and I skipped over to the door with a smile. When he came into my eye sight I gave him a little wave. He grinned and motioned me to come outside while saying to Clarke, "I'm good." He handed her the pizza and I walked down my front steps.
It was late evening, and the sky was purplish pink. It was sunset, and it looked magical from my doorstep. Funny how I'd never noticed that before. I sat down on the 2nd step and looked at Owen. He sat down next to me.
"How are the CDs? You like any of them?" He pulled his earphones off his ears and put them around his neck.
I nodded. "Yeah, I've only listened to the first one so far though…I've been busy. I liked track number 3 on it. The rest were a bit…too much," I knew immediately that sentence had to be rephrased.
"Placeholder," the reply came automatically and in a serious voice.
I sighed. "I don't like the heavy guitar and the screaming…it's too much in one song."
"Well, I'll find something that you like, eventually." He stood up and held his hand out to me. I grabbed it and pulled myself up.
Owen glanced at the sky. For a moment, I wondered what he was thinking. I wondered if he appreciated the view like I did in that very second. My answer came seconds later. He glanced back at me and brought his hand up to my left cheek. We both leaned in and our lips met, kissing on my front step, under the sun set.
It really was magical.
