Things were definitely starting to look up from then. Hours after his conversation with his mother, Draco had managed to drag himself out of bed to sit at his desk, where he started to write Hermione the promised letter. Draco had finished her book way before the holidays, but he couldn't bring himself to write as soon as he got back home, though he always had it in mind. Writing it was a big decision in itself, as big as talking to her had been. He had to muster his courage, he had to decide to walk away from his old life, from what he always believed to be right, one more time. He had to accept that he would never have the life he was supposed to have. And to be quite honest, it was his mother who gave him the final push he needed, even if she'd never know.
The next day, when he told Pansy about the letter, she seemed worried. She didn't think it was such a clever idea — she somehow managed to convince herself Harry and Ron were putting Hermione to it, so they'd all humiliate Draco in front of everyone. While Draco could understand her concern, he wasn't so sure Harry Potter and Ron Weasley were capable of planning so far ahead. Besides, the only reason Pansy had thought of that was probably because that was the kind of thing she and Draco would pull.
.
While it had been too late for Hermione to reply to his letter before coming back to school, she made sure he knew she had received it as soon as they found themselves in the library once again.
Draco could finally start living once more. He had his best friend back by his side, he was on good terms with the girl he liked, his relationship with his parents didn't falter one bit… Now, the only troubling things on his mind were Snape and Lupin. While he had his own personal problems with Snape lately, though he had never mentioned what he thought of his risky class on werewolves, the man was acting really weird, and Lupin too. While their relationship was constantly improving, Lupin had been more distant lately, clearly withdrawn and concerned about something.
Draco wasn't about to ask any question, he knew Lupin would tell him off for even asking, and Draco had to focus on school work anyway. The exams weren't that far away.
.
When they arrived, Draco was serene. Pansy and him had worked out a schedule and even with Draco's transformations, they managed to work as much as they could. She even came to the hospital so they'd quiz each other.
Their last exam would be Defense Against the Dark Arts. In the morning, they had History of Magic, and they were now heading outside for Lupin's exam. Soon, they'd be free.
Every third year Slytherin was crossing the courtyard, Pansy and Draco walking at a snail's pace so they could talk away from their friends. They had binoculars around their necks as they would go and try to watch Buckbeak's execution later that day. Though giddy with excitement when Draco had received his father's letter about Hagrid losing his appeal, the two teenagers were now talking seriously about Professor Lupin and how distant he had been with Draco lately.
"Even in the Shack?" Pansy whispered and Draco nodded, shooting a glance at Crabbe and Goyle who were a few paces away from them.
"Yeah, it's like even there, he's somewhere else. I mean, maybe I'm just imagining it, you know. We've been talking and it's been great but we're not actually hanging out either… I don't know everything about him, and certainly not the way he acts…" Draco said.
"Yeah, but you guys… Well, you do share a very special bond, I mean…"
They exchanged a furtive look, just for a split second, then they both looked away, uncomfortable.
Their attention was then immediately caught by a man who was sitting near them as they passed the arch leading outside the courtyard. While they didn't stop walking, they stopped talking, taken aback. You didn't see an executioner often, especially one sharpening his very, very large axe. Dressed in all black, his cloak's special hood on his head, they could only see his eyes, mouth and chin appear. He looked straight out of Azkaban, and like he belonged there. And that, he did, but behind bars.
Draco obviously recognized Walden Macnair, He was not only one of his father's friends, but he had been the one executing Draco's attacker four years ago. Walden didn't know the extent of the attack, of course, and yet Draco suddenly felt very exposed. As they crossed him, he couldn't unlock their eyes and he sped up as soon as Macnair was behind them, just so that he wouldn't be able to see them anymore.
"Alright there, Draco?" Pansy asked as she glanced behind them.
"I've heard they're executing Buckbeak today," Theodore Nott startled the pair as he walked past them, hands in his pockets.
"When did you get there?" Pansy asked, holding Draco's arm so he wouldn't get into it with Theo.
"I wasn't done eating," Theo grimaced, "just caught up." He turned to them and walked backwards. "I wouldn't watch that if I were you," he told them, nodding at their binoculars. "If he doesn't get it in one go…"
With that, he turned and continued his way.
The group finally arrived at their exam and thought it was the weirdest thing ever. Lupin was one original character. And, yes, Draco could admit it now, they never had such a good professor for this class. Pansy and Draco watched the first few students get across the obstacle course before she pulled on his arm. He leaned towards her and she talked close to his ear. "We should do it now if we want to be on time."
She showed him her pocket watch and he agreed. They didn't want to miss the show. They both removed their cloaks so it would't get in the way and Lupin noticed them before they even got time to step forward.
"Do I see volunteers?"
I'm ready to go Professor," Pansy said with an amused little smile, getting her wand out from its usual place; tucked under her belt like a sword.
"Go Pansy!" A boy shouted from the small crowd. She turned to her House, did a sort of exaggerated bow, and then got ready.
She did great, too. When she got out of the old trunk, in which she had faced her Boggart, even Lupin clapped.
"Excellent work, Miss Parkinson," he said, smiling at the girl.
She rejoined Draco, holding her wand behind her back, her pride painted on her face.
"Mister Malfoy?" Lupin called. Draco gulped. While he really wanted to be on time for the execution, he had hoped he would go last for the exam, just so no one would still be there to watch him fail against the Boggart. But not only did he have to go now, it looked like most of the class was staying to show support to their Housemates, even some of those who were done with this last exam.
He felt a strong tap on his shoulder, and he heard a few whispers, including someone who said "you can do it!". He glanced at the Slytherins, saw a few encouraging smiles and with a nod, he turned to his exam. He loosened his tie and rolled up his sleeves. He got his wand out, and when Lupin instructed him to, he started. The obstacle course went swimmingly. Then, there was the old trunk.
"Deep breath, Draco," he heard Lupin say and he finally entered the trunk, following his professor's advice.
Come on, he told himself, you've faced worse this year.
In a way, he did. While it would never change his nature and the effects of the moon, every opportunity he got to stand his ground, to make choices for himself, to fight, and revealing the truth to Pansy, got him feeling a bit braver. So, when his father got out of the shadows, he raised his wand. It wasn't truly his father, it wasn't truly his mother, and those were echoes. His parents loved him, and he would never hurt them, never.
"Riddikulus!"
He flicked his wand, then watched as his mother disappeared in a puff of smoke while his father tripped on his own robes. The man stumbled for way too long as he tried to avoid the fall, arms flailing, and Draco had to move out of the way before Lucius finally fell flat on his face. While Draco wouldn't burst out laughing — Boggart or no Boggart, he was frankly too shocked of having done this to his father —, he did chuckle, and it was enough for the creature to regain the shadows.
He got out of the trunk victorious, unable to conceal his grin. When he saw that Lupin himself was smiling broadly, he felt like he was suffocating, he was so proud.
Pansy and Draco sat down on their cloaks for a while to watch their friends succeed — or barely finish the course for Crabbe and Goyle —, and they regularly checked the time. Then, they got up, grabbed their cloaks and their binoculars before they left in a hurry.
"Here, it should be perfect," Draco said. They put down their cloaks behind the high rock and stood next to it. They looked through the binoculars and high-fived.
"We've got the best seats," Pansy sniggered.
Minutes passed and they commented on the situation, but they were still waiting for the execution to happen.
"D'you think they're already there?"
"We're early, I'm not sure…" He looked at Buckbeak again and wondered what was that hint of discomfort in his mind.
Pansy elbowed him," The oaf isn't gonna last long after this."
"If he's still our teach next year, we'll take care of it," he commented, his usual note of vehemence back on his tongue.
"You won't!"
The pair turned, startled, only to discover Harry, Ron and Hermione. Draco didn't miss her expression. She looked hurt. But Harry and Ron… Oh, the agony behind their eyes, hidden under all this rage. He couldn't help but snicker.
"And what are you gonna do about it, Potter? Cry your eyes out with him?"
"Pathetic," Pansy added, eyes going back and forth between Ron and Harry.
The boys approached but Hermione suddenly elbowed her way between them as she walked forth.
SMACK.
Draco staggered, not even registering what just happened. When he looked back at Hermione, she seemed furious.
Even Pansy didn't know how to react. Harry and Ron's mouths were as widely open as their eyes. Draco touched his burning, prickling cheek as he slowly straightened up, quite shocked, eyes only on Hermione.
"I thought I saw you try," she said too quietly for her amount of anger, and Draco got it.
She wasn't just mad at him; she was defeated.
Pansy stepped forward but Draco's hand finally left his cheek to stop her from going further.
Hermione and Draco stared at each other for a moment or two, as if silently dialoguing, everyone else shut off from the exchange.
"C'mon," Draco finally uttered in the same tone before he walked away.
Pansy stared at Hermione too, but the Gryffindor was now only looking down. Pansy grabbed their cloaks and strode off after Draco.
When they got back into the empty common room — The students already done with their exams either outside or at Hogsmeade —, Draco angrily threw his binoculars on one of the couches before he kicked the small table. He sat down, face in his hands as he tried to contain himself.
Pansy still didn't know what to tell him. She removed her binoculars from around her neck, put them down on the table, and she quietly sat next to him. After a few moments, she softly rubbed his back.
"Are you okay?"
Draco grunted in his hands before letting his arms fall back on his lap. He sighed as he turned to Pansy. She couldn't help but glance at his red cheek. He seemed to be about to say something, but he turned away again.
"Look, it doesn't matter," Pansy said, "who ca—"
"I do," Draco said shortly. Pansy had to fight her sigh. "I know you still don't like this, but I do care. I just…"
He clenched his jaw, swallowing back his words.
"Go ahead, tell me."
"I just don't understand why I can't do it. Why I can't be… good."
Pansy frowned. "What do you mean? You're great."
"It's easy for you to say," Draco mumbled. "You know what I mean. I'm not a good person."
Gee, Pansy wasn't prepared for that kind of talk that day.
"I'm trying, you know," he continued, "I've tried to be… I don't know, it's weird. I looked at Buckbeak and I knew there was something off. Yet I enjoy what's happening to that bloody…" He paused. "I know I'm an asshole, but why can't I help it? And you heard what she said…"
"D'you actually want to be… What you call a 'good person'"—she grimaced—"or do you just want to be what she's looking for?"
"What's the difference if she's looking for a good person?"
She knew what he meant by "good person", she knew why they were the "bad guys". And for once, it wasn't even about their beliefs or purity or anything of the sort. While they didn't hold Weasley or Longbottom in high regards in spite of their blood, she knew why they were theoretically the "good guys". It was their heart. Their compassion, their empathy, their need to help others. Why she or Draco never really acted like that with people they weren't close to, she couldn't tell. They just weren't. But to Pansy, Draco was good. And to Draco, Pansy was good. It really didn't matter the way they were raised or what they were taught, even if it made them look awful to other people. The truth of their heart showed whenever they were alone together. Draco had it in him with people he cared about, that was it. So she couldn't agree with him at the moment.
"I'm just saying," she said carefully, though she didn't hold her sigh this time, "if you've got to completely change and force yourself to be somebody you're not just so she'll look at you differently… I'm not sure that's what she's looking for either. I'm not sure that's what anybody's looking for. She has to like you for who you are, set whatever flaws she sees in you aside so she can appreciate what you can give her or… what she can love about you. And then, if it's not meant to work, it just won't. You can work on yourself, you can improve if you think that's what you need to do. But I don't think people can truly change, deep down."
At that point, Draco had slightly turned his head, just so that he could look at his friend out of the corner of his eye.
"Didn't you?"
She looked up at him, breathed deeply, and confessed. "I don't think I would have felt guilty about my reaction, and my rejection, if I didn't have it in me all along."
Draco pursed his lips and leaned back on the couch as he observed Pansy. They stared at each other for a few moments until he looked up at the ceiling.
"I think my father would think me weak," Pansy said quietly. "I think… My parents wouldn't be proud of me if they knew about you, if they knew about me… I also have many reasons to fear their rejection. But earlier this year I realized that… I'm proud of myself, y'know? And when I think about it sometimes, I find that I can fall asleep just because I am. And I think that's enough."
She was fiddling with her fingers, looking down at them, and Draco observed her again. He finally put his hand on hers, pressing them softly.
"I don't think my words mean much anymore, but I'm really proud of you too…"
Pansy glanced at him and though she tried hard to repress her smile, her lips twitched and her smirk appeared. "Well, it means the world to me…"
.
And so, despite the hurt, despite the doubts, Draco was calm again when he made his way to Snape's office later that day. It was time for him to take his last potion and Go to the Shrieking Shack for the last time of the school year.
"You should go now, you're gonna get in trouble," he told Pansy. She had asked a few times if she could accompany him to the office, and he ended up accepting. But he didn't want Snape to see her, he didn't want him to know she was in on the secret. As she departed, he almost ran head first in the wooden door because it didn't open.
"What the —"
Pansy turned around as Draco tried to open it again. He knocked and gave a worried look to Pansy. Nobody answered.
"D'you think he forgot?" Pansy asked.
"He wouldn't, he never did," Draco tried to say firmly, but his voice quivered. He knocked harder. "What the hell is he doing?"
Pansy looked around. "Well, Lupin should be here too, maybe he'll be able to open it?"
"Yeah, where is he at?"
"D'you reckon they finally killed each other?"
"Come on, it's not funny," Draco mumbled, pulling on the handle again.
"You've already tried that," Pansy sighed as she took out her pocket watch. She looked around again, worried, and she grabbed her wand. Guessing she would use Alohomora, Draco shook his head.
"He has better protections than—"
They both watched, flabbergasted, as the door opened in a creak at the incantation.
"Clearly, he left in a hurry… I better go. Pick up your jaw and hurry, I'll come by the hospital tomorrow." she said. She quickly pecked his cheek and ran the other way.
Draco walked in the office but took a moment to look around. Did something happen to Snape? This was so weird. And where the hell was Lupin? He could only hope his professor had already taken his potion…
He walked towards fuming the cauldron in the far end of the room. He grabbed his usual cup, filled it with the potion and drank it right away. He glanced at the clock and almost choked on the disgusting drink. He left the empty, still fuming cup near the cauldron and ran out of the office.
He kept up his speed as he crossed the dungeons and got up the stairs leading to the Entrance Hall. As he was reaching the large double doors of the castle, a voice stopped him dead.
"What are you doing here?" The masculine voice called angrily. Draco rolled his eyes, barely contained the grunt of annoyance that left his lips and turned around to watch Percy Weasley quickly get down the large marble staircase.
Draco hesitated. Should he make a run for it? Probably not. Without his wand, he had next to no chance to escape this idiot.
"You know the rules, Malfoy, you're not supposed to run around the castle at this time of the day, and certainly not to go outside on your own. So tell me, where are you going in such a hurry?" Percy asked, looking at the panting teenager from head to toe.
"None of your business, Weasley," Draco said coldly. Percy didn't look impressed.
"Right, we'll see about that," he said," let's go see your Head of House, why don't we?"
"I don't know, maybe because he's not there?" Draco said vehemently. He didn't mind taking it out on him. He was getting even more annoyed about Snape now. That was one of the reasons he was supposed to be with him, so he wouldn't get in trouble for wandering around the castle alone.
"We'll go and check," Percy said firmly, "just in case you'd be a liar," he added with a glance to Draco's arm. With that, the Head Boy grabbed him just above the elbow and he pulled Draco towards the staircase he had just climbed.
"I can walk by myself, let go," Draco said angrily as he tried to get away from his grip, but Percy was quite stronger that he thought he'd be.
"So you can run away? Don't even try, Malfoy."
Draco chuckled. His prospects for the night were fantastic. He didn't know if he was supposed to laugh or cry, but at that point he just wanted to scream.
They arrived in front of Snape's office, which Draco had left open. He hadn't even thought about it when he left, but he now regretted it as he knew Percy would drag him in. He hoped he wouldn't want to wait for Snape to come back.
"Told you," he simply said, a hint of arrogance in his voice. Percy glared at him before he looked around the room, wondering why Professor Snape would be out and about with his office open for anyone to walk in. If the situation wasn't so critical — and if it had been anyone else but a Weasley, really —, Draco would have been on his knees, thanking him for not paying attention. Indeed, the Head Boy turned around without taking an interest in the fuming cauldron. He was probably too happy with his new plan to pay attention.
"Well then, we're just going to go see what Professor McGonagall has to say about this," he said, hardly concealing his grin.
"Don't worry, I'm not afraid of what McGonagall's going to say," Draco said through gritted teeth. He knew McGonagall wouldn't get him in trouble for his little walk. But he was worried about turning right in the Entrance Hall. Surely, Percy wouldn't be so cocky if he knew what might happen by dragging Draco all around the castle.
"It's Professor McGonagall for you," he said sharply. Draco mimicked him silently and rolled his eyes.
Of course, they had to go to the third-floor. Of course, she was in Class 34, one of the classes where Draco had learned the basis of Transfiguration during his first year. Percy was still holding him tightly, and he didn't even seem to notice that at that point, Draco was almost walking faster than him.
They stopped in front of the classroom and Percy knocked. When they heard 'come in', the Head Boy opened the door and dragged Draco in the room. McGonagall didn't look up from the written exams she was marking.
"Professor McGonagall, I am truly sorry for bothering you but I found this third-year student running around while I was finishing my round," he said. Finally, that got McGonagall's attention. When she saw Draco, she immediately stood up, too fast not to look suspicious. However, Percy didn't notice.
Draco was looking furious and he strongly pulled his arm again but Percy grabbed him more firmly.
"Knowing the danger we're all in these days, I believe this can't go unpunished, and I thought it would only be proper to bring him to you since Professor Snape is not in his office."
"Why isn't he there?" Their professor asked. Draco met her eyes and knew she was only addressing him.
"I don't know, Professor," Percy said, "and Malfoy refuses to tell me what he is doing wandering the castle at this inappropriate time."
"Um — you did well, Mister Weasley," she said before she vaguely waved to tell him he could leave. "I will take care of this, you can go."
"Are you sure, Professor? I can wait outside to walk him back to his common room," he said. Draco kept glancing nervously at his teacher when he wasn't looking at Percy.
"Mister Weasley," McGonagall started, and she sounded rather severe, "if I say that I will take care of this, it means that I will take care of this."
"Of course, Professor, I apologize," Percy said as he finally let go of Draco. The boy rubbed his arm and gave Percy a smirk when he left. Once the door was closed, he dropped the arrogance.
"What on earth are you still doing here?" She asked as she walked round her desk, and Draco heard how alarmed she was through her quivering voice.
"I would be long gone if this cretin didn't drag me all the way up here," Draco spat too aggressively. He couldn't help it. He was seething, he could feel his blood boiling as time passed and the few streams of thoughts he could still discern in his head were starting to get confusing. Yet, under McGonagall's gaze, he looked away. "I was waiting for Professor Snape. He's… I don't know where he is."
"Did you take your potion?" McGonagall asked, genuinely concerned. Draco nodded.
"P- The door was open, I went in and drank a cupful."
"Well then, I think it's time for you to go," she said as she put a hand on his shoulder to lead him towards the door. "Do you have any idea what time it is?"
Draco had never heard her sound so alarmed.
"Of course, that's why I was 'running around the castle'," Draco said, his imitation of Percy quite ridiculous. He got a nasty stare from his teacher and he shook his head, getting out of the classroom with her. "Do you know where he is?" Draco asked her as they walked down the third flight of stairs. "He never missed…" he mumbled, unable to finish his sentence.
McGonagall looked at him, knowing exactly what he meant.
"I don't know, but you did good by going in anyway," she said.
"Professor Lupin—" he began, "I- He wasn't- I didn't see him either," he quickly managed to say. McGonagall didn't slow down but she glanced at him.
"Whatever do you mean?"
"We usually take the potion together, but he wasn't there either. I don't know where they are, and I don't think he…" Draco stopped as they arrived in front of the large front doors. "I don't think he drank his potion tonight. He has to, it's… Do you know where he might be?"
"I do not," McGonagall said quietly as she shook her head.
"I thought maybe his office… What if he fell asleep?"
McGonagall stared at him for a second, at the bags under his eyes and his pale face.
"I'll go and check, but he might already be on the other side of the passage," she said, and Draco hoped she was right.
He only nodded. "Anyway, I…" He looked outside and took a deep breath. With one last glance at his professor, he took off running.
Professor McGonagall couldn't help but watch him leave, her closed hand against her chest as she worried for the boy.
.
Draco was so afraid. He still had a long way to go before reaching the Shack, and he was afraid he might turn in the passage, close to his goal. His heart was pounding so hard in his chest he thought he might drop dead. A rush of adrenaline surged through him when the Whomping Willow got into view. Luckily, everybody would be safe soon. And he wanted to believe he would find Lupin on the other side, waiting for him. And he'd reassure him, he'd tell him he took his potion and that everything was alright.
Yet, a little voice kept telling him that Lupin didn't. Or maybe it was the other empty cup near the cauldron. It wasn't fuming, and now Draco couldn't get the image out of his head. More than Lupin losing his mind though, he couldn't stop thinking about how painful turning would be for him. While it still was with the potion, Draco had no way of measuring how much worse it was without it. He got the sudden urge to turn around and go check if Lupin wasn't in his office by himself, but he tried as hard as he could to push the thought away. He would never have the time.
He was working on adrenaline only at that point and it allowed him to still stand on his feet when he was met with an incredibly unpleasant surprise near the old tree.
"Draco —!" Snape let out, apparently just as surprised.
"What the hell are you doing here? Why are you going down there?" He asked loudly.
"I need you to calm down, Draco," Snape said as he lifted a hand in front of him.
"Calm down? Calm down? " Draco shouted. "I was waiting for you! I thought I wouldn't be able to take the — I thought you wouldn't show up, that — and you want me to calm down?"
"Listen to me Draco, please," Snape continued, and his tone made Draco frown. He looked at him from head to toe — why wasn't he colder? Why wasn't he putting him in his place? Why did he sound almost afraid? "You cannot go in the passage tonight."
Dumbfounded, Draco's mouth fell open but no sound came out. He closed it, opened it again, looked at the tree, then at Snape again.
"Not tonight," Snape repeated calmly.
"What am I supposed to do?" Draco asked quickly, now desperate. He couldn't hide his panic; he wouldn't lash out again, he wouldn't be able to hide the concern on his face.
"You need to go in the Forest."
"But Dum—"
"I'll tell him why I made you go there, I promise. But you need to go, and to run as fast as you can," Snape said, now sounding way more calm, composed even, given the situation. Draco knew asking for a reason was a waste of time.
He stammered again. He glanced at the Forest and realized that his entire body was starting to shake.
He was terrified.
"What if I get too far and don't find my way back tomorrow? What if something comes for me?"
"I'll come and get you first thing in the morning, I promise you. You just find a safe place." Draco clenched his jaw, his eyes going back and forth between Snape and the trees in the distance. "Now, Draco. Run."
There was a moment, Draco's eyes met Snape's one last time. If he wasn't so afraid, he'd have been able to notice the little glow of torment in them.
He knew there was no need to protest. Snape wouldn't send him there without a good reason. He wouldn't have missed their meeting without a good reason, and Lupin wouldn't have missed his potion without a good reason. He was just afraid of what it could all mean.
He listened. What choice did he have?
He ran again, his shaky legs hitting the grass so hard with each steps he thought his stomach was going up his throat.
He soon reached the trees. In his first year, when he had his detention with Hagrid, the Gamekeeper had told the kids to never leave the path. Draco had none to follow.
He could see the trees, he could avoid them, but that was all he had, and it was only thanks to the effects of the moon. Panting, he could feel thin branches smacking his face and hands. He felt like he had never been so slow. He grabbed at his tie and removed it, throwing it away. He didn't care about anything anymore. He hopped as he removed his shoes and his socks before he got back to his previous rhythm, his feet hurting as they stamped on roots, branches and ferns.
He noticed how hoarse his breathing sounded and his fingers felt around for the buttons of his shirt. He didn't know if he was far enough, but he was starting to get dizzy and sick. His fingers were shaking too much and he kept letting go of the buttons. He finally stopped and doubled over to try and catch his breath. His lungs were burning with each breath and he coughed before he spat the saliva he couldn't swallow. He stumbled as he approached a tree and he leaned on it, his sweat rolling down his face and neck.
He finally unbuttoned his shirt and removed it, abandoning it on the ground too.
He couldn't see the moon under the thick foliage and as he focused on any bit of sky he could see, he heard a snap. Startled, he widely looked around, clasping a hand on his mouth so he wouldn't breathe so loudly. He looked down and stepped back. He had stepped on a branch. He realized that he didn't even feel the pain under his feet. He couldn't feel anything. He quickly turned around when he thought he heard something again. Was it just his imagination, or was something lurking behind the trees? Had he been going in circles? What if he was back near the castle?
He started to walk, hoping he was actually going deeper in the Forest. He had to lean against trees and he was looking around to spot any movement around him. That's when he noticed a few spots lighted by the moon. There were only a few rays coming through the thick foliage, but it was enough to get his heart to speed up again. That moon was up and Draco felt sick to his stomach.
But it wasn't nausea causing this feeling, it was a soaring pain. His hand still against a tree, he suddenly gripped it tight. He blinked quickly, his pupils dilating, and he soon could see even better than before. A moan of pain crossed his lips as he fell on his knees. He shook his head when he felt his ears grow, as if to get the pain to let go of him. The wind suddenly came to life around him, he could hear it clearer than ever as it blew in the leaves. Buf he became deaf to anything around him when the real change came. It was his face, his hands, his entire body; bones rearranging and patches of hair growing. He could only hear himself scream and his ribcage crack. It was as painful as if each of his bones were being shattered. As tears fell from his face to the dirt, he watched his palms grow and as his claws get out.
He threw his head back as he screamed in pain. It didn't last long, but it was still too long. It lasted until his screams became grunts and howls as the transformation was reaching its end, as his breath became raspy and loud.
Now, more than sounds, more than sight, it was smells. Everything reached his snout. Animals, creatures, soil, bark, fresh air. Nothing could get past him. Not even the smell of a Hippogriff. Not even the smell of humans. Of two, very distinct humans.
His long howl echoed through the trees, got groups birds and bats flying away in all directions to leave the area, and he started running through the trees again.
