Summary: Kagome moved from Japan to America when she was in seventh grade. She stopped talking in eighth grade, and no one knows why. Now, in eleventh grade, Kagome will undergo a series of events that will dramatically change her...Kagome's POV.
Rated M. Why? Because my mind has many bad things in it and I don't know what I might use...
Dates Written:
June 3rd, 2006
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The Games We Play
Entry Twenty-Four: Unknown
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Everything. It was all gone. Why had this all happened? Was it punishment? No, it couldn't be. He hadn't done anything terrible enough to deserve this, had he? If he had, he wanted to know what. He wanted to know if there were any possible ways of fixing it now.
It was just tearing him apart to know that he was unable to protect her. It killed him to know that the one person he had cared for (above the age of ten) wasn't with him. She was in the hospital, suffering. The idea of her being in nothing but pain was another agonizing thought all on it's own.
She was always in pain when she was young. He read her diary (it's not like she was able to tell him not to). He read of her father's death, her mother's insanity, her rapes, and her brother's running away. He read all of that. She had a hard life, but she had never showed it. Each time he would get a glimpse of her at school, she seemed content. Sometimes, she would seem happy.
She deserved to have a happily-ever-after. She needed it, after all that had happened. She needed a break from all the hard times. She needed to catch her breath and be able to face the normal hard things that many people faced. Bills, taxes, insurance. Nothing hard like she had.
He sighed. He wasn't any use. There was little chance that she would live. The doctor told him that a while ago. She had started slipping into a deeper form of sleep, rather than unconsciousness. Many people who went into a coma for longer periods of time never woke up.
That scared him more than he would openly admit to anyone. He would not tell his brother, his father, no one. Perhaps, if Rin was lucky, she would hear of it. But he didn't enjoy confiding in children too much. Why?
When he told Rin of the accident, she had said that Kagome needed the 'magic bunny'. Sure, it was cute of her to think that a stuffed animal was magic. But when Kagome was on the verge of dying, Sesshoumaru couldn't bring himself to give it to her. It's not like he could, anyway. No one was allowed to see her other than the doctor. She looked horrible, the doctor claimed.
Sesshoumaru stood up and walked towards her home. He took care of her family as best as he could. Women weren't suitable for supporting a household. He didn't like the idea of having the family in such peril that the women had to work. In his mind, women would stay home and take care of the home.
Sure, it sounded prejudice, but that was just how his mind worked.
The grandfather was getting old and wouldn't be able to support them for much longer. The son wasn't working, either. He went back to school.
Sesshoumaru knocked on the door, glancing at the groceries that he had left in his car. They wouldn't mind getting them, would they? He hoped not.
He looked up as Kagome's mother opened the door. She was smiling and had an apron on. "Sesshoumaru... Thank you so much." She said. Souta went past her to retrieve the groceries that they had on the fridge. Kyoko had been hesitant on letting him take care of them, but he had plenty of money.
At least there was an advantage to being filthy rich.
Sesshoumaru was about to leave but was stopped. The mother cleared her throat and he turned around to face her. She had opened the door and was offering him to come in. He nodded his head then went strait to her couch and sat down.
"Hey, Sesshoumaru!" Souta called from the kitchen. Sesshoumaru smirked faintly. Very faintly.
"Hello, Souta..." He said. He stood up and watched as Souta began to put away groceries. Kyoko got some lemonade then gave a glass to Sesshoumaru. He thanked her politely, admiring what a kind mother Kagome had. That must have rubbed off on Souta and Kagome, since they were pretty kind as well.
"Hey, Sesshoumaru... I need to ask you a question about Kagome and her hospital..." Souta trailed off. Sesshoumaru could just smell the uneasiness radiating off of him. If it was something that had to do with Kagome, there was no chance he would not do whatever he could to help.
"They're running tests on her and all... They need someone to pay the bills so they know they're not doing this for nothing. We don't have the money... And..." Souta trailed off and became more uneasy. He hated asking people for help, specifically with money issues. But, he couldn't help it. They didn't have money and no one was able to work.
But Kyoko offered to work again. Souta said that he didn't want any stress on her after what happened with her sanity. Grandpa was just getting senile and unable to do the tours. Souta was going to school as fast as he could. None of them could support themselves.
"Of course. I am surprised you even have to ask." Sesshoumaru said. Souta smiled at him and pulled out a bottle of water from the fridge.
"I used to be worried that my sister was befriending demons. Then when she said she started liking you as more than a friend, I got really nervous. I'm glad to know that she picks only the best demons. You're taking good care of us." Souta said. Sesshoumaru nodded then left, murmuring a goodbye.
- A few months later... -
"Miroku..." Sango said tiredly. Her boyfriend looked down at her and slightly grimaced. The makeup was still hard to adjust to, he had to admit it.
"What is it, Sango?" He asked calmly. Sango snuggled closer to him and the trunk of the tree, sighing. Today was a good day for them to have come to the park.
"You realize, it's been exactly four months since Kagome got in the accident?" Sango asked. Miroku mentally whacked hismelf for this. He knew that she would say something about Kagome. Her mind had been on Kagome more and more each week. He understood, but it was making it hard to spend any time with her.
"Yes, it has..." He commented dryly.
"Did you know we can see her now?" Sango asked. This got his attention. Kagome was open to visitation? Why hadn't Sango told him earlier?
"Would you like me to take you?" He asked. She looked up at him with big, brown eyes.
"Yeah. I found out a while ago, but I haven't seen her yet. I thought it would be wise to go with you, in case I... fall apart." She said. Miroku nodded then stood up. He held out his hand towards Sango, and she took it.
Kagome, please... Just be better now. It's been four months of nothing since you got in the accident. I didn't even realize you had that much of an impact on my life... Miroku silently prayed.
- - -
"Daddy? Is she asleep?" Rin peered over the low railing at Kagome. She was already told that she couldn't touch her. When she asked why, Sesshoumaru said that it would hurt Kagome.
"Yes, she is asleep, Rin." He said. Rin nodded her head and looked at Kagome.
"It must hurt." She added.
"I imagine it does."
"Daddy?"
"Yes, Rin?"
"Is this why I haven't seen Kagome anymore? Is this why you don't talk to her? Becuase she's sleeping in a hotel?" Rin asked. Sesshoumaru chuckled and sat down in a chair. He pulled Rin onto his lap and rested his chin on hers.
"Yes, this is why... She's having a very peaceful sleep." Sesshoumaru said. He highly doubted that. She would probably be a dream consumed with bad memories and pain. She could be suffering more in her sleep than she had in her life. He watched Kagome's face closely as she winced. Yes, a very painful sleep indeed.
He hadn't realized that Rin got off his lap until she had problems getting back on. He pulled her on and turned his attention to Kagome once more. Only, this time, there was a stuffed animal under her arm. It was quite cute, really. Sesshoumaru was even able to notice that, after the stuffed bunny had been placed, her face softened. It seemed as though she was able to sleep with it.
Sesshoumaru looked down at Rin to question her. She gave him a stern look that was supposed to make him feel as though he were in trouble.
"If you had given Kagome Mr. Bunny sooner, she would have done better. Mr. Bunny heals everyone, even Kagome." Rin said. Her pouting face never moved. Sesshoumaru was about to open his mouth and tell her that it didn't do anything, but something jerked him from that idea.
Sango and Miroku came in, smiling. "Should have known, Sesshoumaru. As soon as people were allowed in, you would be here." Miroku said. Sesshoumaru didn't respond and looked back to Rin. He opened his mouth to scold her, but Sango spoke and took his attention off of it.
It seemed as though Rin would never get a lesson in reality.
"This is a cute bunny." Sango said. Rin smiled and looked at her.
"It was mine! It helped me get better when I had a tummy-ache. So, I gave it to Kagome so she can get better too!" Rin said cheerily. Sango smiled at the child's innocence then brushed Kagome's bangs out of her face.
"Rin, stuffed bunnies can't--"
"Sesshoumaru! Look!" Sango nearly screamed. Sesshoumaru winced as the loud tone echoed throughout the small room.
Sesshoumaru looked over at the sleeping woman. Only, she wasn't sleeping. Borwn eyes stared at everyone, darting from Miroku to Sango to Rin to Sesshoumaru. She seemed so... confused.
- - -
It hurt, that was given. Everything hurt. She couldn't figure out a way to define it exactly. Her entire being hurt. A body? What in the world was that?
Oh, right. The human body. Of course, what else would her soul be in? A coffin?
She instantly slapped that thought away. She wasn't dead... Right? She could feel her body. She could feel pain. Wasn't death a place where you didn't feel anything? Well, how should she know? It's not like she had much experience with death.
Of course, she told herself that she could very well be dead. She couldn't remember anything. She couldn't remember her name, she couldn't remember if she had a family. Everything was just... gone.
Surely, when you die, you keep some of your memories. Why would the Gods be as harsh as to strip your life's memories and loves from you after you spent so long down there? And why would you not be allowed to know how you died? It didn't seem right.
Then she realized her eyes were open. She was definitely alive, she knew that much. How? The pain. Death made your body numb, not drenched in pain. Why was she in so much pain, anyway? What happened? Did she jump off a cliff and survive? Was she suicidal? Did she attempt to end things and get a second chance?
It was scary to not know your identity. To not the essence of your being. She didn't know if she was shy or outgoing. She didn't know if she was single, dating, married, divorced, widowed, anything. Her mind was just... blank. It bothered her. There were just things that should always stick in your mind. Why were none of those things there now?
"Rin, stuffed bunnies can't--" Stuffed bunnies? How were stuffed bunnies important to her? As she tried to figure it out, she realized that there was something soft touching her arm. Perhaps... Perhaps she had a stuffed bunny in her arm? No, that was silly. If she couldn't remember anything, then what good was a stuffed bunny?
"Sesshoumaru! Look!" She instantly wished that this person would leave. It hurt her head to hear a scream like this. Three people leaned over her and one got on top of her. She stared at all the faces, curious who they were.
There was one with short, black hair. He had it back in a small ponytail and he had a few earings. Next to him was a girl with brown eyes and dark brown hair. Her style was that of a goth.
Wow. It seems that I did hang out with the suicidal kids... Kagome mused.
Thethird person was a man with silver hair and golden eyes. Her heart raced at the sight of him, and the heart monitor showed it. And the last person had giant brown eyes and a child-like grin.
"See, daddy? I told you that Mr. Bunny was magical!" The little girl said happily. Kagome watched her for a while before the silver-haired man removed the child from her bed. She stared at everyone, curious.
Were these her friends? Were they her family? Were they strangers coming to look at her? Who were they? Why wasn't she able to remember anything?
Tears filled her eyes as she struggled to access non-existant memories. She wanted to know what was going on. She wanted to know why she couldn't remember anything. She wanted to know everything she had once known. Why was she unable to figure this out?
Kagome opened her mouth and tried to speak. The words didn't come out. Sure, it was sad that she couldn't speak. But, when the words refused to come out, she felt a rush of sadness come at her. Why did it bother her so much? What was so important about not speaking? Whatever had stuck her here had obviously taken her voice.
By the way... Where was she?
Kagome tried to look around, but there was something around her neck. It was firm and it wouldn't move. As she attempted to figure out her surroundings, something opened. A man with glasses and blonde hair walked up to her, smiling. Why was he smiling? Was her memory loss his doing?
Suspicion filled her as she watched him do things like hold her wrist. He held her wrist for a few seconds then he messed with his strange necklace. A silver thing was placed against her lungs and the other ends of the necklace in his ears. He remained this way for a while, moving the silver peice around several times. He got something and stuck it in Kagome's ear. It made a beep and he pulled it out.
"She's doing much better. I am surprised at how much she improved over the past few hours." He remarked. The little girl looked at him with a wide smile.
"That's because Mr. Bunny healed her!" Rin said happily. The doctor looked at something on Kagome and reached for it. He said something about how germ-infested it was. As the plush item was being taken away from her, Kagome was able to make a connection.
The stuffed animal was vital. She could not understand why, but she needed it.
The longer the fake bunny was gone, the more pain filled her body. She could feel her headache return with revenge. She could feel sleep filling it's vendetta. She started slipping off into another realm, the realm of pain that she was in before.
It didn't matter if she wanted to stay awake. There was no fighting it. Someone lifted her hand and touched it with soft skin. She wanted to see what was happening, but she couldn't. Slowly and gradually, the realm of pain began to consume her. She could no longer feel her legs, but she knew they were in pain.
The heart monitor slowed down, and this got someone's attention. She heard someone, most likely the little girl, cry that the bunny was vital to her survival. The soft skin vanished from her touch then something was placed in her hand. It was soft, and she assumed it was the small plush bunny that she had been holding before.
Slowly her body began to respond. She could feel the realm of pain leave her. Even though it left, she was able to feel the pain of unknown things. Her eyes slowly opened once again and she stared at the man in glasses. He seemed confused, but he shook his head and smiled.
No? No what? Did I ask a question? Did they ask a question? She stared at him in confusion as he said something about blood pressure, blood percentage, and CAT Scan results.
What?
Kagome stared at everyone as they all smiled. Why were they smiling and staring at her? What had she done? She opened her mouth to speak once again. Everyone seemed expectant of her... Why?
She tried desperately to speak, but the words would not come out. It was like they were afraid to come out if she couldn't remember anything. She saw everyone's faces fall with an exception of the little girl and the man in glasses. What? Why were they all upset? Why was she upset again, like before? What was so important about her voice?
Everything was just so unknown to her...
And that hurt... That among other things was making things throroughly painful.
O o O o O o O o O o O
Where am I? Who are all these people? Why do they keep saying my name? Is this even my name? Who is this woman? Is she really my mother, like she claims? And this deep-voiced man, is he really my brother? How come I don't know anything. What happened? And... Who is the silver-haired emotionless man?
O o O o O o O o O o O
Review Replies:
Kisshu-luv Yes, this will be a Kag/Sess fanfic. I only posted the reply here because you asked.
If you guys want me to reply in the fanfic (or reply at all, considering how much I've been flaking off on that), let me know. Like I said, I'm flaking off and it's been a while since I replied to a review (I'm a lazy ass AND a sadistic bitch!) So, tell me to reply and I will.
Next Chapter: Blame the Brother
Reviews Needed: 510
- Lonely Bird
