DISCLAIMER: YO! IT'S ELYSIA'S 6th BIRTHDAYOMGWDFBBQORB!
-for those of you who don't know, it means omigod what the f--- barbeque on rye bread!
AKA: IT'S NOT MINE! HAHA.

Yosei11: My number-one reviewer-person-it-alchemist! I now dub thee, Yosei11, Freelance Alchemist. Rise and accept the challenge!

Roy-Fan-33: Yep, how true...SIBLING! XD. The hospital thought so too...oooh pretty colours.

Kaite Mideya: I am so glad we see eye-to-eye here, friends? Here's your update, sorry it took sooo bloody long.

Luminara Windu: I'm glad there are people that enjoy my pathetic excuse for original writing… Please, keep reading!

Review! Oh, and sorry for the death of the story on a temporary basis…I'm in summer school and was, for a while, stuck in a stupid hospital with nothing to do…Meh…As far as I'm concerned, the EMPLOYEES of the mental thing need to be locked up…I know they're respectable but that place was living HELL. Sorry if your parents work at Presbyterian H's Behavioural Centre for Teens.
–mutters odd things under breath that sound suspiciously like Klingon cursing-


Chapter Four
Tourniquet of Tears
Broken and Fallen

I can't take this anymore; Edo-kun can't either. The other night I finally told him that I had heard him on that stormy night, that I knew the truth about his affections. Why, I ask myself now, did I question him? Why could I not have done what I needed to and gone after him, just giving him what he wanted for once, dammit? But no…now he's in the guest bedroom, crying his beautiful golden eyes out…Oh, god, how much can I handle? First Ishbala, then failed suicide, and now Edward…
I could jump.

It's just now that this occurred to me…I could fly with the phoenix of fire-filled death. But would that mean rebirth into this accursed and brutalized flesh? No. I can't do this. Hughes, Riza…Ed…I'm sorry about this. Tonight's it. If things don't—can't—get any better by tonight, then they never will. My only real regret now is not choosing to jump.

Because as much as I hate to admit it, I love someone that I can't afford to.


Ed was so tired, so overwhelmed, and most of all, so broken. He loved Taisa, why couldn't Roy just accept it as it was? He couldn't stand the Colonel's constant attempts at suicide, but at the same time he knew that if something like this actually happened…If they became more than friends, it would be like jumping together. The military, and indeed the community, did not sanction these relationships. And Ed knew it…

"WHY!" he screamed at the window, tears steaming down his usually passive face. Falling to his knees without warning, he whispered the words that he needed to say, had to get away from his heart. "I love him—it wasn't supposed to be broken—and make my feelings for him hurt more…I thought that maybe he would at least understand…and not walk away…" he began uncontrollably shaking, crying, and on the inside, he felt a pain in his heart that simply hadn't been there before.

"Who's walking away?" The soft, quiet voice came from right behind him, where Roy simply crouched. "I'm not, Ed, and I never will."

Leaning over to the younger alchemist gently, he kissed the top of his head, ruffling the golden locks with a hand afterwards.

"Taisa…" Ed said quietly, the floodgates of tears beginning to close already. He turned his body towards the Colonel, then leaned forward slightly, finding his body gently lifted and supported against Roy's warm chest. Hearing the quiet heartbeat of the man, his face looked up softly at the only one who could save him; they were the only ones who could save each other. A gentle kiss was placed on Ed's slightly open lips, returned warmly, but not in a passionate way. It was loving, but not suggestive or begging in any manner. Bringing his lips back, a light and somewhat awkward hug was received on both ends, neither wanting to let go. Then, the amber eyes—those eyes that had captured him so quickly, turned back up, but this time with a request.

"Taisa, tonight…um…tonight can you stay in here with me?" Smiling in a rare and kind manner, without the usual smirk, he replied,

"Hagane no, if you asked me to sleep outside, I would."

Contented with that answer, Ed blushed and went to get his shower and nightclothes.


With no second thoughts, Roy had said yes. He loved the teenager. Pulling his shirt over his head, he kept a pair of comfortable pants on to preserve any hint of modesty he had. As Ed came out of the shower, his heart caught in his throat as he saw a boy, not yet a man, his long blonde hair streaming over shoulders, nearly down to his waist. The automail on his body was fit perfectly to the small but muscular shape of his limbs, and even with the alchemist wearing a pair of boxers, he could see simply how beautiful this lost creature was. His only wish was that he knew how to help the teen, but the sins he had committed lay between him and his future.


Climbing into the large, comfortable bed, Ed snuggled up next to the older man, putting his head near Roy's chest again to hear the heartbeat. Roy watched the blonde curl up into a rather small ball to sleep, and as he too began to close his eyes, he heard a small voice.

"Taisa, will you still love me in the morning?"

Smiling just enough that his newfound lover saw it, he drifted off into peaceful dreams.


Tired yet again, Roy woke up to see the blonde alchemist still in bed next to him, snuggled closer than ever. He sighed gently, watching his breath catch stray hairs and then shine when they caught the golden rays of the dawn.

"Taisa…" Ed murmured sleepily, waking up slowly but surely, cracking his eyes open to see the black orbs that made up Roy's eyes.

"Yes, love?" Came the easy, almost practiced response to the query. "Get up, Hagane no, we have things to do."

"Like what? Sleep?" Again the lump that was made of Ed spoke. "Get back in bed…it's like…EFFING 7 AM! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TRYING TO DO TO ME?" he yelled, falling out of the plush bed. Chasing after the Colonel with nothing but his bare hands and the intention to beat him down, he was rudely stopped—

—by a kiss.

Taken completely by surprise, the startled teenager backed up just enough that his back thumped lightly against the wall, forcing him to open his mouth slightly in surprise. Roy took advantage of that, pressing his warm tongue inside of Edo-kun's mouth, probing slightly to provoke a reaction. Which, of course, he got, being the person he was to Ed. The younger male reached up and wound his fingers through the raven black hair, messing it up even more than it already was.

When they finally pulled away from the passionate kiss, Ed laid his head against Taisa's chest, almost as his way of thanking him. As he walked out to get dressed for the day, Roy watched him almost curiously.

Who would ever know that the Fullmetal Alchemist had a soft side?


Dressed for the day, Ed found it much easier to clear his head and think about the mission the Colonel had made a remark about…apparently it was in one of the more northern cities. Anything other than that, Roy wouldn't tell him, and now it was really bugging him.

Entering Mustang's office without knocking as usual, he ran right into the annoyingly serious face of Hawkeye. Upon seeing Edward, though, her face softened.

"Hello, Edo-kun," she said to him, trying not to look down too far.

"Konnichi-wa, Hawkeye-senpai," came the response. Walking into Roy's office finally, he sprawled across the couch, yawning sleepily.

"You know, Halfmetal, by the way you slept last night, one would think that you almost wouldn't be tired," the smirking Colonel called from across the room. Gritting his teeth to stop from yelling, he smirked back. Why, he wouldn't tell. But for once, he held himself together. Even Ed had no idea why.

He supposed it was just the rather odd feeling of being…in love…and loved.


It turned out that Roy was supposed to be going on a mission to the snowy area of Temain, far to the west as well as the north. Allowed to bring one officer along, he had proclaimed to Ed that 'any officer that can kick my ass is the one I want guarding my back.' Thus, Ed was coming along. Sighing, he was about to walk out of the office when Roy quietly called to the chibi.

"Edo-chan, come here for a moment. You look a little pale, frankly." Ed merely yawned at this, his yawn turning into a single cough. "I can always bring Hawkeye with me, you know."

"Nah, I'll come," Ed said offhandedly, waving off concern, as usual. "I'm an alchemist, a little cough won't be anything to worry about," he sighed.


A/N: w00t…I updated! Sorry for the long wait, I'm still rejoicing over the fact that it is summertime! YEAH!

-Anij K'helyr-Jinn