Chapter Forty Three: I Miss You
"-and if I were being honest, truly, I believe my problems may have begun...Anna? Are you listening?"
As if a thought bubble burst above her head Anna snapped back to attention, an apologetic frown on her lips and brows furrowed, "Please, continue. You have my attention."
"It's most unprofessional, isn't it?" Chernabog asked, clearly miffed at the lack of focus, "To put me through the indignity of traveling the building in chains to ignore me?"
Anna nodded her agreement, "You're right. Absolutely right."
"And to sit here and argue..." Chernabog paused, taken aback at the lack of sass in Anna's response. "It's that werewolf, isn't it? Always causing trouble. Come now, talk to your dear friend."
In the back of the lab Milo chortled softly. The sound earned him a glare from Chernabog that was perhaps less serious than it may have been at the beginning of their time together. The three of them had certainly grown closer in the limited time they had been interacting, but would this really be the place to voice her deepest, darkest concerns? No, likely not.
"My mind just got away from me for a second." Anna lied through a cheerful smile. "I swear, I'm all ears."
Chernabog was the one to scoff this time, but to his credit he didn't push further. At least not right away. He carried on weaving what Anna could only assume were tall tales about his upbringing and his life before S.N.O., but periodically threw in a question for Anna.
"This isn't about me you know." She finally chided after one question too many. "This is about you and how we could go about integrating you back into society."
"And what better sign of improvement than concern for my friend?" Chernabog touched his chest, whether the action was meant to mock or mimic a human expression of concern Anna couldn't tell, "Clearly you aren't well. So speak."
She drew in a deep breath, ready to exhale a withering sigh, when Milo peeked around from behind her.
"You are acting differently, Anna." He smiled awkwardly, somewhere between a look of pity and support, "Talking it through would probably help."
"What am I supposed to say?" Anna asked, half to herself. "What can I say?"
There was half a beat of silence as Chernabog and Milo shared a look, perhaps regretting that they had pried open this can of worms. It was too late now, though. As Anna sat there basking in the silence she began to speak again to fill the void her questions left.
"I'm sure you'd love nothing more than to hear all about how I traded my literal love for Elsa for a tiny fraction of information about a case we're not even being paid to work." Anna laughed in that painfully self-deprecating way. "Maybe about how I didn't even tell her. Didn't talk to her about it at all. Just gave away the one thing that's been truly good since I got here with only the tiniest bit of hesitation. Not to mention-"
The pressure of Milo's arms around her brought a familiar and unwanted burning to Anna's eyes. The back of her throat tightened as she struggled to maintain control. What good would it do to cry here? It would only make her look weak in front of her subject and her assistant.
"Oh Anna," Milo soothed, rubbing little circles into her back. "I can't even-"
"Who?" Chernabog demanded firmly.
Though Anna couldn't see him she did hear the sound of what she assumed was either his hand or his fist landing heavily on the glass that separated them.
When he wasn't answered quickly enough he asked again. "Who asked this of you?"
His anger was palpable, and Anna supposed that anyone who cared about her might be right in feeling that way. Kris hadn't been though, he had seemed sure that she could overcome the problem and yet...
Anna explained the situation, leaving out the bits and pieces of their case that she felt weren't necessary, and much to her surprise their reaction was very similar to Kris's.
"Charlatan." Chernabog insisted loudly, "A trick of light and shadow by a man known best for his lies."
"Now, now. It's not entirely out of the realm of reality." Milo tutted at Chernabog, "There are methods by which an emotion might be extracted from a victim. Emotional vampires immediately jump to my mind, with more research on the matter I could likely identify at least a few more. But this? It does seem sketchy, to say the least."
Sketchy. A trick. Lies. Anna clenched her teeth together to keep herself from responding. None of those words could help describe the incredible emptiness she felt after Facilier had taken these emotions from her, could even begin to explain how intensely she wanted to feel something for Elsa so that the guilt of trading such an important thing didn't eat her alive.
"Well." Anna stood from her chair, "I'm on dinner duty tonight. Milo could you be sure that Chernabog gets back safely?"
She didn't wait for a response.
XXX
Elsa couldn't recall a time when she had been so nervous. Her hands shook as she pulled a chair out for a rather bewildered looking Anna. She had surprised Anna after all, so it was only natural she looked a little shocked, right? Especially since it was technically Anna's turn to handle dinner this evening.
"This is unexpected." Anna repeated for the fifth time. "When did you have the time?"
Cheerfully Elsa responded, "I always have time for you, Anna."
She wondered if perhaps springing a meal on Anna out of the blue was the wrong move. Personally after a long day at work Elsa could think of nothing more soothing than a hot shower and climbing into bed. She hadn't noticed any objection from Anna to doing just that in the past, but was this more of an imposition than a help?
"I hope this is alright, if you'd rather rest I can run you a bath or-"
"No." Anna reached out and grasped Elsa's hand, but the smile on her lips looked vaguely forced to Elsa. Was it nerves or something more? "This is wonderful. Thank you."
Kris is just in my head Elsa assured herself, shaking off the notion that anything about Anna's reaction was less than genuine. Anna asked questions of Elsa for a while, wondering aloud if perhaps Elsa needed a little distraction from not being able to go on missions. Elsa assured her that her plans for this evening hadn't arisen from that at all but Anna didn't seem entirely convinced.
Shortly after a silence that fell between them, punctuated only by the sound of utensils hitting plates. Biting her lip and holding back the awkward stream of insecurities threatening to come out of her mouth Elsa looked up at Anna. She looked exhausted. Not just in her body, but something farther down.
Tentatively she asked, "Anna? Is everything...alright?"
"Oh." Anna smiled and nodded, "Yes, it's all delicious. Thank you again, this was really sweet of you."
"No, no. Not that." Elsa course corrected Anna's compliments, redirecting her to the actual point of Elsa's question. "I meant are you alright? Things have seemed, well, off since you went to Facilier's."
There it was, the reaction Elsa had been expecting and dreading in equal parts. Anna visibly stiffened at the mention of Facilier. Her grip tightened on her fork and for a second it looked as if her hand might start shaking. With a quiet clink of silverware Anna set her fork down, then she exhaled and lowered her gaze to her own lap.
In a voice barely above a whisper Anna spoke, "I'm sorry. I was hoping I'd have more time."
"More time?" Elsa shook her head, "For what?"
Anna's explanation was more than Elsa had expected. In fact it left Elsa feeling torn. Initially she found herself feeling as if she had been gutted, was what they had so insignificant that Anna would trade those feelings away for information of all things? But as Anna continued, her voice so small and vulnerable, Elsa reached a level of understanding that allowed her to temper that initial feeling of betrayal.
The gesture was far from the grand thing it may have looked like from the exterior, but Elsa was at Anna's side in seconds. She wrapped Anna's shaky frame up in a tight hug, whispering into her hair.
"Anna, never again." Elsa told her, "Never feel that you need to make a sacrifice like that for the sake of a case."
"This case is so important to you." Anna's hand found it's way to Elsa's arm, gripping her as if for support. "I just want you to get that closure..."
"Never again." Elsa repeated, firm but gentle. She kissed Anna's forehead, "We're going to figure this out."
"I know. We're so close to the killer, I can feel it."
Elsa scoffed, her hand finding Anna's cheek as she adjusted to be able to make eye contact. "That takes a back seat to us, alright? You are my top priority. We are my top priority."
a/n: Sorry for the delay in posting, I got very into miniature painting and lost track of my free time management xD
