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Chapter 10
The next morning Kitty awoke early and went downstairs for breakfast. The house was silent, and she assumed everyone was asleep. She was startled when she walked in the dining room and saw Mr. Cadogan sitting there alone.
"Good morning Miss Kitty." he said looking up as she entered.
"Good morning. Forgive me, I was not expecting anyone to be up at this hour."
"Hannah woke me, and I found that once I got her back to sleep, I could not go back to bed so easily." he explained.
"I see. I was just going to have some breakfast and then go for a walk around the park. I dearly love the morning hour, before all the commotion begins." she smiled.
"You are not going on a walk."
"Mr. Cadogan, I do not mean to be impolite, but you are not my guardian, you do not have any type of say over what I can or can not do." Kitty said indignantly.
"I am not trying to spoil your fun Miss Kitty, but it is not safe for a young lady to walk London alone, at any hour."
"There is no one outside, I will be fine."
"Miss Kitty, I'm sorry, but I can not allow you to go. I know Mr. Burton would be angry with me if I allowed you to go, and if your older sisters heard, I am sure they would be quite worried." he said firmly.
"I would not go alone if my sister was awake, but she would be angry with me for waking her." Kitty sighed, sitting in a chair across from Mr. Cadogan.
"Do you wish to go that badly?" he said with no emotion.
"I have not been for a morning walk at all ths summer. If I were at Clinton hall there would be no argument, there is no danger at my sisters home." she said, she was obviously disappointed.
"Miss Kitty, if you would really like to go, I would be willing to accompany you." he continued reading his newspaper as he made the offer.
"Really?" she was astonished by his offer, he had been so cold and callus with her last night, she couldn't imagine why he was being so kind, over something so frivolous and unimportant.
"Of course, we'll go after you finish breakfast if you'd like." his face remained in his paper, and his voice remained emotionless.
Kitty ate her breakfast quickly, she didn't want to miss the morning calm. Mr. Cadogan kept his promise and walked with Kitty to the nearby park. Their was a light fog lifting over the city and the air was warm. Birds songs filled the air and occasionally the steps of horses could be heard on the cobblestones. They kept silent for some time and Kitty finally grew tired of the quiet.
"Do you have a favorite time of day Mr. Cadogan?"
"I prefer the time of day that is the busiest, I suppose that would be around lunch time, or dinner."
"Really?"
"Yes, I didn't always, but I have grown to hate the silence of the morning and the evening. I find those times of day afford me time to dwell on the memory of my wife." he said sadly.
"That makes sense. I usually hate the silence of the day, but there is something about the morning, it's so peaceful, it's a different kind of silence." Kitty said, trying to put the feeling of the morning into words.
"Miss Kitty, ti does not seem that there is ever much silence in the Burton household, how is there any silence to hate?"
"No," she laughed, " there is not, which is why I enjoy the summer so much. But during the remainder of the year at Longbourne, my home, there seems to be nothing but quiet."
"Surely you exaggerate."
"When I was younger, I had 3 elder sisters and one younger that all lived at Longbourne, there seemed to be never be silence. Someone was always talking, or giggling about something. In one year, three of my sisters married. My father spends much of his time in his study and Mary is constantly reading. I find myself missing the noise, and, life of the house very much."
"I know that sometimes silence can be disconcerting. Silence merely affords me time to remember Amelia, sometimes I find myself hearing her voice." he said sadly. "I'm sorry, I've never told anyone that."
"Don't apologize, you may tell me whatever you like." she smiled.
He was a very sad young man. It seemed as though his face had not known a smile in a long time. His eyes had no life or happiness in him, and it seemed as though nothing mattered to him anymore.
"But, Miss Kitty, I barely know you."
"That doesn't matter, sometimes it's easier to talk to a stranger."
"Yes, perhaps your right. No one that knew her lets me talk about her. Mr. Burton pretends like nothing has happened, and Sophie reverts to tears when I mention her name."
"Yes, Mr. Burton did tell us not to mention anything about it." she admitted. "But if you need to speak about something, you may talk to me. I won't tell Mr. Burton or Sophie."
"Thank you Miss Kitty, I think I may take you up on that." he said in his sad tone. "Perhaps we could make a habit of our morning walks?"
"Certainly, unless of course it's raining." Kitty laughed, Mr Cadogan however, did not.
"Miss Bennet!" Mr. Lowell approached them from the opposite direction.
"Oh hello Mr. Lowell," Kitty blushed, "this is Mr. Cadogan, he is also staying with the Burtons.
The gentlemen bowed but said nothing to one another. "Would you care to accompany us while we walk?" Kitty asked.
"Yes thank you, I would love some company." Mr. Lowell said, joining their step.
"I expected to see you yesterday." Kitty said.
"Yes, I did mean to call, but I found myself buried in work."
"And what is it you do Mr. Lowell?" she asked.
"I am dealing with some things dealing with my father's estate." Mr. Lowell answered.
"Oh, and that is why your in London?"
"Yes, quite right."
They walked a bit further and Mr. Lowell turned off, he had some work that needed some attention. Once again Kitty and Mr. Cadogan continued in silence for a while, and then Kitty decided once again to speak.
"I'm sorry Mr. Cadogan. I met him at the ball we attended the night before you arrived."
"You need not explain to me." he said, not looking at her, continuing to walk.
"Well, I am sorry for his interruption of our conversation. If you'd like to talk, I am ready to listen."
"Not today, I think we should be getting back, everyone will be waking shortly."
"Very well, shall we walk tomorrow?"
"Unless it is raining." he said stoically, Kitty laughed.
They walked silently back to the town home where they found everyone around the breakfast table. The party was quite shocked to see them walking through the door, for they thought they were still sleeping.
"Miss Kitty wanted to go for a walk and I could not allow her to go alone, so I agreed to accompany her." Mr. Cadogan explained, seeing all of their puzzled faces.
"How kind of you to go with her Mr. Cadogan, and thank you for not allowing her to go alone. Lizzy and Jane would have been upset if they knew she had gone alone." Georgiana smiled.
"I thought her sisters would be upset if she had gone alone. It was no trouble at all."
When he smiled, Kitty happened to look up and was amazed by how handsome he was. His sullen expressions had a way of masking the attractive attributes of his face. He seemed to look almost like a completely different person, his youth came back to his face. His smile disappeared and his sullen looks returned to his face quickly.
"I didn't notice you were gone when I woke this morning." Mary said in a puzzled tone.
"I'm glad I mean so much to you Mary." Kitty laughed.
"Well, you didn't make your bed before you left, I just assumed you were still sleeping." Mary replied.
"Have you already had breakfast?" Georgiana asked.
"Yes, thank you." Kitty answered.
"Sophie is Hannah still sleeping?" Cadogan asked.
"I believe so yes, but I haven't checked on her because I thought you were still sleeping."
"I suppose it is about time to wake her up. Excuse me." he left the room and went upstairs to gather his daughter.
As Mr. Cadogan went upstairs the bell was rung at the front door. Mr. Rawlins and Mr. Lowell were shown into the house. Both Mary and Kitty were surprised to see them.
"Mr. Lowell! How lovely to see you again." Kitty smiled.
"I was about some business this morning and met Mr. Lowell, I told him I needed to come call on the Bennets and to my great surprise, he expressed that he knew you also, so he decided to accompany me here."
"Well then, shall we go to the parlor?" Kitty suggested.
Kitty, Sophie and Mary accompanied the gentlemen to the parlor. Mr. and Mrs. Burton had planned to go out so they begged an excuse from their visitors. Eventually Mr. Cadogan came down with Hannah and joined them.
"Miss Bennet, I've brought something for you." Mr. Rawlins said after they had all been seated.
"Mr. Rawlins, we barely know each other, you should not be buying me presents." Mary blushed as she spoke. No gentleman had ever bought her a gift, with the exception of her father.
"Well Miss Bennet, I enjoyed our conversation yesterday, and thought that perhaps we could talk about books more often. So, I've brought you a book. It's called Candide, I have been wanting to read it, so I thought we could both read it and discuss it."
"You bought me a book?" Mary stuttered, shocked.
"Yes, I hope you have not read it yet."
"No, no I have not. Thank you very much Mr.Rawlins."
"Do you care for reading Mr. Lowell?" Kitty asked.
"Not particularly, no." he replied dryly.
They continued to talk as a party for quite some time. Mary kept fairly quiet because she was still shocked by her gift. Mr. Lowell did not say much either, but Mr. Rawlins proved to be a very amiable gentleman, very easy to talk to. Even Mr. Cadogan had joined the discussion in his sullen manner.
"I think I would be perfectly content to live in London permanently." Kitty admitted.
"After a while I fear the business of the city might grow tiring." Mr. Cadogan commented. "I would miss the park on my estate."
"Yes Mr. Cadogan, I do agree. But London can hold my attention for a great deal of time." Mr. Rawlins added.
"There is so much to keep occupied with." Kitty added.
"But if you are not fond of balls and parties, there is not all that much that keeps your attention." Mary said.
"Miss Bennet, there is much of London you have not yet seen if you believe balls and parties are all it has to recommend itself." Mr. Rawlins explained.
"And Mr. Lowell, what is your opinion? I have not been here long enough to make my own opinion yet." Sophie asked.
"I have no opinion." he replied.
"How is it that you have no opinion over where you would like to spend a majority of you time?" Mr. Cadogan asked.
"It's just not something I think about." Mr. Lowell replied.
"But I don't understand how you could not think about where you live. While you are living somewhere don't you automatically form an opinion on whether or not you like the place?" Mr. Cadogan offered, frustrated by Mr. Lowells lack of thought.
"I do, but I don't often compare my opinions of the places." Mr. Lowell answered, in his voice their was an air of sarcasm.
Mr. Cadogan decided to end the discussion and push no further. Mr. Lowell had made him far to irritated to continue. A new subject was offered by Mr. Rawlins. Everyone contributed their opinions, except of course, Mr. Lowell. The visitors remained for quite some time, until Mr. Lowell announced that he had some business to attend to. Mr. Rawlins also agreed that he would be on his way and both gentlemen took their leave.
"Mr. Rawlins dotes on you Mary." Kitty smiled, teasing her sister.
"He does not, he merely wants a person of intellect to discuss with." she said defensively.
"Well I think it's wonderful you have found someone to discuss with." Kitty laughed.
"I am merely glad he is not Mr. Lowell." Mary joked.
"There is nothing wrong with Mr. Lowell, I think he is very handsome. Do you not think he is handsome Sophie?" Kitty asked.
"Yes, very handsome." Sophie answered.
"He may be handsome, but he is dim-witted to be sure." Mary laughed.
"Mary, you are cruel, poor Mr. Lowell simply has a lot on his mind." Kitty explained.
"Perhaps the problem is that he has nothing on his mind, at all." Mary added.
Kitty decided to ignore her sisters comment and picked up her needlepoint. After a few moments of silence Hannah started to cry. Mr. Cadogan got up immediately and tried to quiet her, but she proved to be inconsolable. Sophie took her and tried as well, but the child continued in hysterics.
"May I try Mr. Cadogan?" Kitty asked.
"If you like." he sighed. He was growing weary of the noise, and hated to see his daughter upset.
Sophie handed Hannah to Kitty and she cradled her gently in her arms. She stood and slowly rocked back and forth singing softly. Hannah's tears quieted as if she was straining to hear Kitty's melody. Eventually her sobs stopped completely and her eyes began to close. Kitty continued to sway for a bit longer, making sure Hannah was truly asleep, then replaced her in the cradle. She did not want Mr. Cadogan to get angry with her for sitting with the sleeping baby on her lap. Once she was settled, she looked up to see Mr. Cadogan with tears in his eyes.
Kitty pretended not to notice the tears and walked back to her seat. The room remained silent until the Burton's arrived home and dinner was served. They all spent a pleasant evening together and before they retired to bed Kitty and Mr. Cadogan agreed on a walk for the next morning. Kitty was quite anxious to ask Mr. Cadogan about his tears, but decided to wait until the next morning.
