Drift's P.O.V.
Another two days pass; Ratchet believes we're ready for the next step. It's scary, though; Ratchet will cover the trach with his gloved finger. I'm scared to see if Jamie is not ready for this step. I doubt she'll relax with Crosshairs, and I have to lie with her. I try not to panic when Ratchet tells me I'll be covering the trach.
"I wouldn't do this if she weren't ready," Ratchet tries to assure me.
He tells me we'll take it slowly. Start with ten minutes, wait an hour before doing this again, and so on, but I can continue beyond ten minutes if I think Jamie is doing well.
Even Jamie is scared to do this but quickly relaxes. I'm glad there's a marathon of one of her favorite shows. We can keep this going for a few hours if she does well.
Ratchet's P.O.V.
Jamie is doing well; I haven't told Crosshairs, and Drift Jamie can make sounds when the cuff is deflated. Talking takes time to get used to, but I also believeJanie'ss mental state plays a role in her not attempting to talk with the trach. I hope they'll hear her laugh today.
Jamie is distracted and continues to breathe independently, keeping her oxygen level at 97%. The marathon Drift put on lasts four hours. I watch as he gives Jamie a syringe with apple juice before tube feeding her.
How long before she tries to pull everything out? She's already tried to pull the trach out twice.
Crosshairs left to make lunch for him and Drift, while Drift tries to convince Jamie to go to the cafeteria with him. I hate the first sound Drift hears from Jamie is crying, and I was hoping she'd laugh and make the two mechs smile.
Drift's P.O.V.
I hate howJamie'ss first sound with a tach in is crying. Ratchet knew with the deflated cuff; that Jamie could make sounds, but she stays quiet. He was hoping Crosshairs and I would hear her laugh.
"It's ok; you know the others care about you."
It's hard to get Jamie to calm down. She's getting frustrated and tries to pull the trach out. I hold Jamie close, restraining her arms as she cries. Ratchet tries to tell Jamieshe'ss recovering, but I don't think he's listening.
As if he knows what's been going on, Crosshairs walks into the medbay with our lunch. He puts the tray on the table to help Ratchet and me calm Jamie down. A few minutes pass before she stops crying. Crosshairs made sandwiches, knowing I'd be holding Jamie, and I could get a little tuna from the side of my sandwich and feed Jamie. Crosshairs, Ratchet, and I dread letting Jamie eat more than a small bite of food; knowing she'll be upset if she throws up, we will have to start doing that soon.
Jamie is tired from crying, and I can get her to nap after inflating the cuff and putting her on oxygen while Crosshairs, Ratchet, and I talk about what to do next with Jamie's recovery.
"She's been able to keep down the small amounts of food and drink we give her; I think she's ready," Crosshairs points out, "I know she might throw up, and that upsets her, but can we even avoid her throwing up."
"Not likely, but it might not last long." Ratchet replies.
Ratchet insists that Crosshairs and I go for a walk while Jamie naps, but I can't with her nightmares over the past couple of days. Crosshairs then suggests going to the lounge room since the room is close to the medbay.
Crosshairs" P.O.V.
I understand why Drift is afraid to leave Jamie alone, and it's been rough the past couple of nights with her nightmares. I can't even suggest we have one of the others watch Jamie, and I don't think she'd relax seeing anyone else with her.
"You want me to sit with her"" Sunstreaker asks.
"I don't know," Drift sighs.
"Umm... isn't she frightened to see doctors?" Sideswipe adds.
"You need to take time away from her more than me, and I'll stay with her," I tell Drift before going to the medbay.
Both Sideswipe and Sunstreaker followed me, which Ratchet isn't pleased with but lets them stay. I tell them how Jamie's day has been so far, adding how we're still keeping her on oxygen when she sleeps for now.
I tell them they can leave, not wanting them to see her deal with a nightmare, but they refuse to leave. I tell Ratchet to let them stay.
Sideswipe's P.O.V.
It's hard to think she had a good day of progress when she became distraught when Drift suggested going to the cafeteria with him.
"I hate there's not much we can do," I sigh.
"I know," Ratchet says in a sad tone.
An hour passes before Drift tells Ratchet he has had enough time away from Jamie.
"Crosshairs is here, I'm here-."
"Let him stay, Ratchet," Sunstreaker insists, "his girl needs him."
It's rare for Sunstreaker to be this caring.
Sunstreaker and I stay, hoping we can help calm Jamie down. Hating that we're waiting for her to wake up from a nightmare.
Drift holds Jamie, hoping his touch will keep the nightmare away, though we're unsure if it's possible.
His plan didn't work; instead, it's freaking Jamie out more. Drift lies on the bed and tries to get her to wake up.
"It's only a nightmare; you're safe," he assures her while holding her hand.
How can we help? I ask Sunny through our bond.
I don't know what anyone can do. Sunstreaker replies before leaving the medbay.A few minutes pass before Drift can hold Jamie on his lap and hug her. I want to take that damn trach out, but I know Ratchet would have already if it was safe, but having it in scares Jamie like she forgets and thinks she's been gagged. Even if Jamie's body is fully recovered in a week, healing mentally will take months. I don't know what to do to help Crosshairs and Drift, but I stay here.
Sunstreaker's P.O.V.
I don't know what to be furious about more; the way Jamie's family treats her, how bullying affected her, or what Megatron did. What can we do to help you, Jamie?
I sit on the couch in the lounge room, trying to figure out something.
Ten minutes pass before Sideswipe sits next to me.
"She's asleep again," he tells me, "for now," Sideswipe sighs.
"That bastard will pay!* I vow.
As I expected, Sideswipe tries to talk me out of planning revenge. Sure enough, Crosshairs and Prime walk in as he's talking about revenge.
"What am I supposed to do? Watch her deal with this shit?!" I rage.
"How's taking care of Megatron going to help her?" Crosshairs asks.
"He has a point," Sideswipe adds.
I storm out of the room towards the training room.
After an hour workout session, I return to the medbay to check on Jamie. Crosshairs and Drift are out of the room. Though Ratchet is in his office, I still don't like Jamie being alone, even if she's sleeping. I sit by the bed and watch her sleep peacefully.
"You don't understand how much we worry about you, Jamie," I say out loud though Jamie can't hear me.
I hear Ratchet talk to Jolt about Jamie. Discovering Jamie is still weak and is exhausted by mid-day, but nightmares during her nap are something new she's dealing with.
Damn, her mental state is getting worse.
I rush to my room and grab my sketchbook and pen. I'm staying by Jamie even when Crosshairs and Drift return.
It's probably not the greatest subject to sketch, but I work on sketching Jamie sleeping.
Crosshairs and Drift return a half-hour later but say nothing. They sit on chairs on either side of me. I can finish my sketch in two hours before Jamie wakes up. It's four in the afternoon. I watch Drift talk to Jamie; not sure how easily he can get yes or no answers from her in different ways is a good or bad thing. Jamie wants to deflate the trach cuff again. Of course, Drift tells Ratchet, who's ok with this. I didn't think Drift would have me hold her. I hate how he has to assure her she's safe. Jamie is small, to begin with, but feels tiny in my arms. Even with Ratchet's specially formulated feeds, Jamie barely gained weight. I would say five pounds; she lost at least twenty-five pounds while at that so-called hospital.
I ask Drift to give me a syringe with apple juice. We need to teach Jamie she can trust us, which might be a good way. Drift shows Jamie what he's doing before giving me the syringe. I make sure Jamie sucks in the juice slowly before taking my chance, hugging her when she finishes, aware she might panic.
"You're ok," I assure her as I rub her back.
I tell Crosshairs and Drift to get dinner while she's relaxed. Though they're unsure if this is a good idea, they leave.
"You're safe; we all care about you," I tell her before getting her tablet and launching the Spectrum app.
Good, there's something she likes to watch on T.V. Hopefully, this will distract her enough to keep her calm.
Crosshairs and Drift return an hour later. Drift wants me to lie Jamie on the bed so he can feed her. I know she hates she's still getting tube fed, so I go into Ratchet's office.
"... I don't know how long it'll be before her body fully recovers. You see how tiny she is? It'll be a while before she gains weight, even if she can keep food down after a couple of weeks of eating small amounts of food," Ratchet explains, "I fear her mental wounds are permeant," Ratchet sighs.
"So she hasn't gained weight?"
"Only five pounds," Ratchet replies in a sad tone, "she's lost twenty-five pounds, and with how small she was, to begin with, it's not good."
I leave his office and the medbay.
Drift's P.O.V.
Sunstreaker is not pleased with what he is told. Everyone hates how long Jamie still has in her recovery, wondering if she can fully recover.
I wrap Jamie in her red blanket before Crosshairs, and I take her for a walk around the base though I'm carrying her, and she has a tight hold on me.
"You're safe," I assure her, worried she will start crying.
Ratchet deflates the cuff again. Jamie remains calm, seeing several other Autobots in the lounge room. I sit on the couch and fix the blanket. The others don't know how tight of a hold Jamie has on me. Crosshairs, and I don't like how careful everyone has to be. In the lounge room, Ratchet watches how Jamie responds to the others trying to support her. I rub her back as the others try to show their support before going back to their spot on the sectional. We watch a little T.V. before Jamie falls asleep. Everyone watches as Ratchet re-inflates the cuff and connects the oxygen concentrator before I carry Jamie back to the medbay. It's been a rough yet successful day.
