Well, I decided to meet the man in the cave anyway.

And he didn't turn up.

Another man did.

It was the doctor. Or the dentist. No, doctor..

Whatever.

I tell you, the look on that guys face! Can he not smile?

I told him about my birthday, and he glanced into space for a moment, and then said,"That's great, Scott."

I could tell by his breathy, absent voice he didn't mean one bit.

The next thing, the dentist - no the doctor - or the dentist?

Whatever

- he put his hand in his pocket and pulled out a half-eaten packet of mint flavoured Lifesavers, and gave them to me.

"Here, Steve" he said, like he was giving me the gift of life,"Take these and use them well"

"Use them well?"

What does that mean?

Oh well, at least I got something. Even if the giver still doesn't know my name!