Thank you for your reviews! Hope you enjoy this chapter
Doesn't Remind me of Anything
Chapter Twelve: All the Things She Said
CAUTION: SEASON ONE SPOILERS!
Rose leant again the Doctor gently swaying, there eyes were both still on Crevasse and Stavishm as they tried to think of what to do next.
Crevasse and Stavishm both slowly regained consciousness and lay on the floor for a moment gathering their bearings. The brothers each raised their heads and turned to look at one another, they both knew they had been thinking the same things, remembering the same pain, knowing the same memories; the problem was that they didn't know how the other had reacted to it.
'Until the end?' Crevasse whispered, his eyes were humane and Stavishm could see emotion building in them. Crevasse looked exactly how he used to and this brought back many painful memories for Stavishm. However much Stavishm hoped or dreamed he knew that Crevasse would continue with his plans – this was just a moment of weakness. Stavishm briefly closed his eyes knowing how much this was going to hurt him.
'Of course… but not like this' a deadly silence followed these words as Crevasse absorbed them. Stavishm could feel his eyes burning into his skull and he slowly opened his eyes afraid of what he'd see. Crevasses' eyes had return to be cold stones set in his head, all titbits of emotion had disappeared and the atmosphere had defiantly changed. The brothers stared at each other unsure of whereto go from here
'If I can interrupt…?' the Doctor cut in breaking their moment and shattering the atmosphere. The brothers turned to look at the Doctor who was still holding onto Rose and they jumped to their feet. As soon as they stood they both instinctively ran their hands over the engravings on the back of their heads, their fingers froze as they feet the crevices that stamped out their identity and sense of being. The Doctor saw the emotion that filled their eyes as they felt these marks and this threw him, he really didn't know what to do – but then again the decision of what to do next was not his choice to make, for Crevasse had already taken it.
The Doctor stopped contemplating Crevasse for a moment when he remembered he was still holding Roses' hand – very tightly. He looked down at their entwined hands feeling a blush come over his cheeks, he didn't know why but he just knew it had. She looked at their hands as well and smiled gently at him, her eyes told a thousand secrets and spoke of a million memories, and somewhere deep within him in the hallways of his memories still echoed her eyes. There was jut something about those eyes, he thought, every time I look into them this feeling comes over my mind, heart and soul, it's as though I've been searching for her forever and now that I've found her I can't believe that I've lost her, he frowned. I suppose it's more as though she's lost me.
He paused his thoughts and looked into her eyes again; he could see that they were shadowed by loss, pain, grief, all things the Doctor couldn't understand. It was as though every time she looked at him the happiness that sparkled in her eyes was shadowed by the grief. He wished that he could help her, make everything in her world alright again, but he didn't know what she needed nor did he know how to provide it.
Rose studied the Doctors deep brown eyes, she thought she could gaze into them forever, they were the true windows to his soul and his emotions, but right now she couldn't read them. They weren't darkened but they defiantly weren't happy, Rose thought about it for a moment more then realised they were confused. Seeing him confused tore at her heart like nothing else could, he had always been the strong one, the all-knowing one, he had always battled the evils and cared for her whilst explaining it as he went along. She was defiantly getting better at it but so suddenly their roles had reversed so that she had to be in charge, she has to save the world, she had to care for the Doctor and it was just a bit too much for her – she was only human after all, an 'ape' as the Doctor had called her countless times but she knew she needed to be more than that, so much more. She was just so tired and all she could hear in her head was her mum's advice 'what you need is a nice cuppa and a sit down' she smiled to herself as she thought this realising how true it was. But she wasn't at home now, she couldn't just have a break whenever she wanted, she was finally beginning to understand why the Doctor seemed tired sometimes, why his temper snapped, why the lines around his eyes wrinkled so. All she really needed, she realised, was a nice big comforting hug from the Doctor, but looking into his eyes she knew he was uncomfortable with her and it was defiantly off the cards. She sighed to herself, trying to save the world was defiantly not as fun as she thought it could be, especially when she kept getting attacked and injured – in truth she knew she was barely hanging on to consciousness but she couldn't let anyone see this. 'Never show your weakness' Mickey always said, so that's what she did – she hid it. She held her head up high and gave the Doctor a mind blowing grin.
Crevasse studied Rose and the Doctor and how they were interacting; he wasn't sure which weakness of the Doctors' he should exploit first, but using Rose against him had shown very promising signs. Yes, he thought, I shall continue with that path.
Stavishm stood in the background slowly slinking away, he wanted to disappear, actually, what he wanted was for this to have never happened, for Crevasse to have never returned to his life. He lived a simple yet happy existence but Crevasse could never have peace, he always had to start a storm, but it hadn't always been that way Stavishm thought with an inward sigh. There past together was a long twisted affair, they have had their good times and their bad times but no matter what they had always stuck together, but that all changed a few years ago, actually he could name the precise moment that Crevasse changed: the moment he stepped out of the transformer at the Franken Hill Institute. It had all gone down hill since then for Crevasse. Just the thought of Franken Hill sent shivers running through Stavishm and causing him to close his eyes in an attempt to block out the pain and fear.
The foursome were all pulled from their thoughts as they looked around the room assessing one another, Rose and the Doctor had now parted and Stavishm stood behind Crevasse trying to blend into the walls (unsuccessfully of course). An inextricable tension hugged the room and all those within its' walls, everyone was unsure of what to say next or how to behave. Rose and the Doctor understood that they had practically tortured the robots as they forced them to relieve traumatic memories, Rose knew it wasn't a good thing to do and she also knew it wasn't something her Doctor would do but she understood his reasoning. They had no other defences left so they had to deal with what they had, even if it meant sinking lower than they had ever done before. She knew the Doctor had thought this as well because as she thought it she felt him think it, she also felt his hand go cold against hers and then pull away. She was upset, she understood that he needed space and time, he still didn't know who he was or what had happened to him, he just looked so… so innocent, she decided.
The Doctor and Rose didn't know how Crevasses' trip down memory lane had affected him, if it would make him change his mind or forget his ploys - or just become more determined. What ever was going to happen they were prepared – or so they thought.
Crevasse raised his shooting arm and aimed with precise accuracy, his finger pulled the trigger releasing one tiny metal bullet… straight into Roses' left shoulder. The impact of the bullet sent Rose flying backwards as a scream escaped her mouth, the wound was a threw and threw and the bullet lodged itself into the Tardis wall, the ship shook violently at this intrusion. Blood spurted out of the wound following the bullets trail, it scattered into a million drops each dispersing over the floor dyeing the Tardis floor crimson. The Doctor couldn't move, he just stood with his mouth open in shock as he watched Rose stumble back against the wall. He'd shot her, shot her! Rose leant on the wall letting it support her as it took her weight, her breathes were coming fast and ragged as she struggled to stand. It wasn't that her arm hurt, it was just the sensation of being shot that had hit her so hard. Stavishm stepped back in horror at what Crevasse had just done, but it was Crevasse who was in the real shock. I've just shot a person, a real human being! He couldn't get his head round the fact that he'd done it, sure I've never been nice but shooting someone… killing someone? I swore I'd never harm an innocent person not after the events of Crescent Chase… but… oh my god… I've become what I've been trying to fight. It was in this moment that Crevasse knew this was the point of no return; he had to continue with his path – no matter where it led him. He'd shot someone so this could happen and if he quit now he'd be nothing more that a murderer. He looked up at the Doctor whose face was a mixture of disbelief and anger, his mouth hang open and his eyes were wide gazing accusingly at Crevasse.
'You shot her!' The Doctor exclaimed in disbelief, still frozen in place. Crevasse winced as he said this
'You shot her!' he shouted this time. He ran his fingers through his hair then turned to look at Rose, she had become very pale and blood was dripping down forming a puddle on the floor.
'Oh my god, he shot her' he exclaimed to himself as though he was trying to force himself to believe it. He watched as Rose raised her right hand and gently brought it to the wound; she tenderly felt it with her fingers then pulled her hand back. She studied the blood that stained her hand, she'd been shot, she just couldn't believe it – none of them could. The moment that she saw the blood on her hand was the moment she felt the mind blowing pain soaring through her body. Her mouth opened on a scream and it echoed off the walls of the Tardis chilling everyone within, the Doctor started towards her as she slowly slid down the wall clutching at her shoulder in the process. He knelt beside her, his knee in her blood soaking through the fabric warm against his skin, he took her hand and squeezed it tightly.
'Rose?' he gently asked. Her eyes flew open and she met his unwavering gaze. His eyes were dark in the shadows and she could see the fierce determination in them.
'You're gunna be alright. Okay? Can you hear me? You're going to be fine' he reassured her as he promised to himself; she struggled to keep her eyes open as she gave him a small smile. He looked into her glassy eyes once more then he jumped to his feet and started towards the medical room.
'Doctor…wait!' she called out weakly as he ran towards the medical room. Crevasse and Stavishm stood frozen in place watching her as blood crept out of her wound and onto the floor. The pool around her was quickly growing as she struggled to remain awake. She let her eyes close briefly and opened them again once she heard the Doctor swearing in the medical room.
The Doctor looked around him and saw the ripped bandages and spilled ointments, Crevasse tearing up the room came flashing back to him as he kicked broken bottles at the wall. He swore viscously as he opened store cupboards and saw they were all empty.
'Damn it, the monster had a plan' the Doctor muttered as he searched empty shelf after empty shelf. That was it, that was the final straw, he was not going to let Rose die, not like this, not after everything she had done for him. She would be avenged and Crevasse would not be allowed to live. The Doctors' eyes scanned the room manically and finally settled on a broken chair leg, a cold smile passed over his lips as he picked it up and made for the door.
Rose watched as the Doctor stalked out of the room holding a chair leg in his hand, his jaw was set and his eyes were emotionless, his matted hair had now been pushed of his brow and stood erratically in the air. His fist was clenched and his strides were long and purposeful, he came up from behind Crevasse and lifted his arm. It swung down with impossible force striking the arm of Crevasse that had the gun in it; the sickening sound reverberated throughout the Tardis causing everyone to flinch.
'How dare you!' bellowed the Doctor as he repeated struck Crevasses' arms, after a couple powerful emotional fuelled hits his arm fell to the floor with a great crashing sound. Crevasse couldn't move he just stood in horror as his arm fell to the floor; the Doctor spat at his arm and raised the pole again
'Doctor' Rose called out weakly; the sound of her voice stopped him. He glared at Crevasse and ran back over to Rose; he knelt beside her once again increasing the blood stain on his trouser leg and took her hand. She looked up at him, her eyes confused
'You pulled his arm off!' she croaked looking at him. All it took was those five words to make the Doctor fall to the ground clutching his head
'Doctor?' Rose whispered, that was the last word to come from her mouth as her head lolled to the side, her eyes closed and her mouth hung open, her chest weakly rose and fell and her hands lay abandoned at her sides.
The Doctor clutched at his head unable to describe the torrent of emotions that sore through his soul, a million memories tore at his mind at once and he saw things played out in his head.
'You pulled his arm off!' That was it the Doctor thought, those five words; they were the first words she ever said to him. Then his mind was racing through planets, memories, aliens…
'I'm the Doctor by the way, what's your name?
'Rose'
'Nice to meet you Rose, run for your life!'
A Northern accent? Is that me? The Doctors' mind raced
'You could come with me'
'By the way, did I mention it also travels in time'
The Tardis…and Rose
'My planet's gone; dead. There was a war. I'm a Time Lord… the last of the Time Lords… I'm left travelling on my own'. The time war, the destruction of Gallifrey. All the pain of the war and the loss hit the Doctor at once, his hands clenching his head in an attempt to stop the memories pouring through his soul, but they continued.
'We've only got five billion year till the shops close' he smiled at the memory of Rose; he could drown in her smile.
'I'm so glad I met you' 18th century Cardiff came flying back to him but then his mind moved on and he was dragged by the powerful current.
'I could save the world but lose you…'
'Tardis key, about time you had one' He saw Rose now forever bound to him and the Tardis by its' key.
'Impossible'
'Exterminate, Exterminate!'
'Let me out!' They were alive; one feeble tiny Dalek had survived the time war as did he. He was no longer alone
'Ten million ships on fire, the entire Dalek race wiped out in one second'
Then his mind moved onto Rose again… Rose and the Dalek
'It wasn't you fault, remember that okay? It wasn't your fault' he saw himself push that enter button in his mind trapping Rose with the Dalek
'I wouldn't have missed it for the world…'
'Exterminate!'
'She was nineteen years old…'. His Rose dead? No it couldn't be
'You're alive!'
'What use are emotions if you will not save the woman you love' Love? Yes, the Doctor realised, I love Rose.
'I killed her once, I can't do it again'
'Stay with the Doctor…it's gunna take a better man than me to get between you two' Now who was that? Adam… the name Adam came to him… oh yes, one of Roses' passing fancies, what an idiot he had turned out to be
'That's her gone; Adam's given up looks like it just you and me. Good'
'You should go back downstairs' he told Rose in his memories,
'Tough' she replied. The Doctor smiled, his strong willed, independent Rose.
'Leave her alone, I'm the Doctor she's Rose Tyler we're just wandering' in that sentence of his memory he pretty much summed them up.
'I only take the best – I've got Rose' How true that was he thought, then his mind whirled his away from satellite five and on to other places different years. Suddenly he was in a church, 1987
'My people would have stopped this…but they're all gone, and now I'm going the same way' Then it flashed back to London 1941faster than the speed of light each memory was a blur but certain phrases just stuck out at him pulling at his mind and sanity.
'Are you my mummy?' the haunting words stuck in his mind
'Capitan Jack Harness, I'm a conman'
'The world doesn't end because the Doctor dances', he had to smile at this – but only for a moment. Then his blood ran cold as his memory moved on to the Game Station. Fleets and fleets of Daleks – he was no longer the only survivor of the Time War. Then he saw Rose, so sweet and heroic bathed in white light, the Tardis soaring through her.
'I looked into the Tardis, and the Tardis looked into me' tears rolled down her face and her voice was flat, wrecked with pain.
'I want you safe, my Doctor. I can see the whole of time and space, every single atom of your existence and I divide them. Everything must come to dust. I can see everything, all that is, all that was, all that ever could be'
'That's what I see all the time. I think you need a Doctor' then he felt Roses' soft lips against his own again as he absorbed the time vortex from her. He could feel it racing through his veins, bursting at his insides trying to break free, and then he felt the moment he knew he was going to die.
'Rose Tyler. I was going to take you to so many places, Barcelona – not the city Barcelona, the planet Barcelona. They've got dogs with no noses.'
'Then why can't we go?'
'Maybe we will, maybe you will but not like this. It's a bit dodgy this process, you'll never know what your gunna end up with. Rose, before I go I just wanna tell you, you were fantastic. And you know what? So was I'. Then the Doctor felt the pain of his sudden regeneration, the feeling of his mass of brown hair growing, his face lengthening, his eyes deepening and his fingers budding. A feeling he could never get use to no matter how many times it has happened. So that explained it all, how he got here, how he changed his body, how he met Rose. He remembered the last couple of days with pride, his Rose, never giving up on him, she was exactly what a companion should be: loyal – until the end. Then he saw the past few days in his mind and was ashamed with his own behaviour, but he was then distracted by the sound of the gun shot in his mind… and he saw Rose lying on the floor bleeding beside him.
'Rose!' the Doctor shouted as he jumped up, his voice had regained all the authority it had lost and all senses of unknowing had now left – for he was certain of who he was. He knelt down beside her and pulled her into his lap; he gently pushed a lock of hair out of her eyes and looked down her face. Nothing could express the rage that poured through him in that very moment nor the guilt he felt for being such a bad companion for the last couple of days.
'Rose?' the Doctor whispered as he stroked her cheek gently, the wet tears that stained her cheek still lay there and the Doctor gently wiped them off with his finger tip. He rubbed her tear between his fingers feeling the warmth of it compared to her cold body. He gently took her head in his hands and wiped away the remaining tears with his thumbs, he looked down at her closed eyes and parted mouth and wondered what she was thinking, what words she was going to say but never had the chance to escape her mouth. He longed to let her know he was back and wouldn't let anyone or anything hurt her ever again – even if it killed him in the process, but he couldn't tell her any of these things because she lay slowly bleeding to death on the floor of the Tardis control room. The blood dripping into the wires of the Tardis caused the ship to react – despite being taken over she was still there, his faithful Tardis. As Roses' blood drops splattered the Tardis she rocked gently and lights flickered in reaction, the Doctor understood entirely what the ship was feeling.
'Oh, Rose' the Doctor whispered as his long fingers traced her cheek
'I'm back… I just want you to know I'm back… can you even hear me?' he asked her quietly but he continued knowing he needed to say these things and he may never have this chance again.
'I just wanted to say thank you, thank you so much for never giving up on me' he smiled to himself as he remembered her fierce loyalty and constant explanations. He released her face and took one of her hands in-between his and squeezed it. He looked at her hand knowing there was so much he needed to say to her but he just didn't know how
'Oh Rose, please rest and don't worry. I'm going to sort everything out – I promise' as he reached down and took her into a huge he felt the Tardis shudder and the familiar sound of the Tardis wailing as she set off through the time vortex. The Doctor was still holding Rose but looked up to see Crevasse standing over the control panel. It was too late, Crevasse had pushed the buttons and however much the Tardis protested the microbe was doing the work and forced her to move. The Doctor held Roses' body as the Tardis shot through time and space knowing there was nothing to prevent this happening and knowing that what he really needed was a plan. He looked down at Rose once more, her face was troubled and her breaths were coming shallow and rapid, he looked from her to Crevasse and knew he had to stop him. He gazed at Rose once more and pushed a curl off her face and kissed each closed eyelid.
'I'll be back, I promise' he whispered as he gave her hand one last squeeze, he stood up and looked at her one last time before a dark storm came over his eyes as he strode towards Crevasse.
'How could you?' the Doctor asked, he didn't shout or even speak loudly, the quietness had more effect and shook Crevasse even deeper when he spoke so coldly and quietly. Crevasse didn't answer him.
'How could you?' the Doctor repeated, his eyes filled with emotion.
'I did what was necessary' Crevasse told him emotionlessly
'Necessary?' the Doctor exclaimed 'Necessary?' his voice was rising to shouting level.
'How was it necessary to shoot her? She's nineteen years old! She doesn't deserve to be shot!' he took a deep breath in 'no one deserves to be shot' he said quietly, but the anger could still be heard behind his words. He was cut off by the shudder of the Tardis landing.
Hope you enjoyed!
Review Please?
