Chapter Four
"No offense, but this is the best news I've heard since I woke up," Amy said as she maneuvered herself into the elevator at 2311 N Los Robles on her crutches. The thought of dragging her broken leg up all those stairs had not been one she relished.
"Indeed," Sheldon said, getting in after her alongside Howard and Bernadette and pressing the button for the 4th floor. "This is a somewhat recent development. If that truck had hit you just four months earlier, I would have been carrying you up the stairs instead."
Amy raised her eyebrows at that mental image and turned to their friends. "You don't think Leonard has any extra rocket fuel laying around, do you?"
"You want to blow up the elevator again while Penny is pregnant? Are you insane?" Bernadette replied.
"Yeah, you just survived one near-death experience," Howard added. "Let's wait a bit for the next one." He looked like he was going to say more, but Sheldon's glare kept them all quiet for the rest of the ride up.
Truthfully, Amy didn't know what to make of all this. While she was in the hospital it was easy to look at her situation with a certain level of detachment, like a case study she might read about in a medical journal. Now that she was released and expected to start getting back to her life, it was harder. She supposed she should be happy to continue her recovery at home, but it wasn't the home she knew, and she was a little nervous about how things would work out.
Sheldon was particularly cagey with details on the missing years of her life, only giving her big-picture information. She knew Howard and Bernadette had gone through with their wedding and now had two kids. That was apparently the reason they were selected to be the ones to take her home, their minivan with all its child safety features was the only vehicle Sheldon would agree to let her ride in. She knew Leonard and Penny had also gotten married and were now expecting. She knew Raj was unmarried. And, of course, she knew she and Sheldon were married and living in 4B with no kids.
The exact nature of her relationship with Sheldon was baffling. If she didn't have the physical proof of the rings, she might have believed their marriage was a strange dream created by her still-healing brain. The last she remembered, she was only just coming to terms with the realization that all the years she spent insisting romance was a useless social construct had been a reaction formation. That she truly did want it but did not believe it was possible for her. Her developing feelings for Sheldon had been the catalyst, of course, but she thought that in all likelihood he would not be able to return those feelings fully. Her last memory of him was a reluctant cuddle session on her couch. That she could wake up married to him after that seemed too good to be true. She actually wasn't convinced that it wasn't more of a business arrangement than a true marriage built out of love. However, in the days since she'd woken up, she had caught Sheldon staring at her a couple times with an intensity that knocked her breath out, and that made her think perhaps there was more to it.
She swung back and forth between wanting to know and being afraid to know, between teasing him for more and then freezing up when it seemed like he might give it to her. Her feelings for him hadn't changed from what she remembered. She still liked him, a lot. Recalling the way he held her hand made her heart leap, though he hadn't tried it again since that first day she woke up. Was it really possible they had done more in the years they'd been together? It seemed like she should feel fundamentally different in some way if they had, but she couldn't tell. And now she would be living with him without knowing the answer.
"Raj picked up Chinese food if you're feeling up to it," Howard said as they reached their floor.
"Everyone's excited to see you again," Bernadette added. Amy expected Sheldon to protest, but he just looked to her to reply.
"Um, sure," she agreed, following them across the hall.
A chorus of cheers greeted them as they walked into 4A, and Amy soon found herself pulled into a hug with Penny that nearly knocked her off her crutches.
"We've missed you so much, Ames!"
"I thought I told you people not to throw a party," Sheldon complained. "Amy came back here to convalesce, not carouse. You're going to overwhelm her."
"It's not a party, Sheldon," Raj said.
"Then where did that banner come from?" Amy pulled away from Penny and noticed for the first time the WELCOME HOME banner strung up by the ceiling above the hallway.
"Party City," Raj admitted, and Sheldon raised his eyebrows.
"She's been in the hospital for weeks, we had to do a little something," Penny argued.
"It's okay, Sheldon," Amy chimed in before he could start ranting. Really, aside from the banner, there was nothing to indicate this wasn't a normal gathering. If it was a party, it was the most subdued one she'd ever attended.
"Why don't we just eat?" Leonard suggested. "Amy, you can go sit down, we'll bring the food over."
She did as instructed, carefully working her way between the couch and the coffee table to sit in the spot next to Sheldon's. While the rest of them unpacked the takeout containers, she finally had a chance to take a good look around the apartment, and she was comforted to find it looked mostly like she remembered. A few pictures she recognized as belonging to Penny, and maybe there were fewer of Leonard's toys scattered about, but otherwise not much had changed. Leonard and Penny themselves didn't seem too different either. Leonard looked a bit older and Penny had a small baby bump, but nothing drastic. Actually, appearance-wise, Amy herself seemed to have changed more than the others. It was still weird for her not having her long straight hair.
Sheldon returned with her food before she could continue down that train of thought, the others not far behind him.
"So how are you feeling, Amy?" Raj asked as they settled into the meal.
"Okay, for the most part," she told him. There was an awkward pause and she realized they must be expecting her to say more, but she didn't know what else to add in this sort of situation.
"Well, we're glad to have you back," Leonard finally said.
"So, see anything here that jogs your memory?" Howard asked, earning himself another glare from Sheldon.
"No, not really," she admitted. While she recognized many things from before her accident, and while she knew they had all probably shared countless meals similar to this one, nothing about it triggered any missing memories.
"Don't worry about it," Penny said. "You're a Nobel Prize-winning neuro-whatever. I'm sure you'll find a way to fix yourself in no time." Amy nearly dropped her plate and she felt Sheldon tense up beside her.
"I'm sorry, what?"
"Penny!" Leonard hissed.
"I won a Nobel Prize?" Amy asked.
"So much for my 'let Amy remember on her own' plan." Sheldon gave Penny a death stare, but she just rolled her eyes. "I should have known you'd ruin it in less than thirty minutes."
"Like you could have kept that a secret. It still comes up on the news."
"I won a Nobel Prize?" she asked again, slightly breathless with excitement.
"We won a Nobel Prize," Sheldon corrected.
"Oh, so you assisted me?"
Now it was his turn to roll his eyes. "We won the Nobel Prize in physics, so if anything, you assisted me."
"Wow, the great Dr. Sheldon Cooper needed a biologist's help to win," she teased.
"Alright." His voice was sharp with warning, but she could see a gleam in his eye. Despite not wanting her to find out, she could tell he was too proud of the accomplishment to stay upset about it. A warm feeling filled her chest as she sat there on the couch beside him, looking into his eyes, matching grins on their faces. She had won the Nobel Prize with Sheldon, her favorite person, who also happened to be her husband. How romantic!
But just as suddenly as that feeling came, another took its place, and she felt like the air was being sucked out of her lungs. She won the Nobel Prize with her husband, something even beyond her dreams, and she remembered exactly none of it. What was probably the pinnacle of her career, if not her whole life, and she missed it. How could she lose something so wonderful? How was that fair? How would she ever recover?
Sheldon looked at her in alarm, seeing her go from elation to near-tears in a matter of seconds, but she placed her forgotten food on the table and stood up before he or anyone else could say anything.
"Excuse me a moment," she choked out the words, hobbling awkwardly down the hall to the bathroom.
"I told you a party was a bad idea!" she heard Sheldon scolding before she shut the door.
Author's Note:
I need to let you all know now that this next month is likely going to be very busy for me. I recently bought a house and I'll be getting the keys soon, so then I'll have to actually start the whole moving process. I also have family coming to visit from out of state and they're planning on staying basically all month. I don't know how much time I'll have to write, but rest assured this story will be in my thoughts. Not like I'm capable of not thinking about Shamy anyway.
Another big thank you to all you lovely readers, your comments brighten up my days. Sorry I didn't get a chance to respond to all of them. Hopefully it won't be too long before you hear from me again. Much love!
