DILAN'S P.O.V.
Dilan groaned quietly in annoyance as a shiver ran up her spine, the cold forcing her eyes to blink open tiredly. It was bright, the sun had just risen, and it was probably what woke her up. She still wasn't used to bright in the morning. She had to tie her curtains closed during the summer when it would get bright ridiculously early. Dilan scrunched up her nose, observing her surroundings with confusion before she nodded to herself remembering last night. Nightmare, roof, Levi. Right.
She yawned as she sat up a bit, flinching in surprise when she saw Levi sitting where she left him against the wall. His eyes were closed, and his head was slightly tilted, black bangs flopping over the side of his face. Dilan sat up a bit more, looking at him curiously. Tabitha was kind of right. Levi was indeed a handsome man. His skin almost glowed in the sunlight and she could probably cut her hand on his cheekbones. Although it would be weird if she tried that. Dilan carefully waved a hand in front of his face, wanting to assess whether he was actually asleep or whether he was just keeping his eyes closed to speak in a minute and freak her out. That was totally something the bastard would do. However, he passed the test and remained sleeping peacefully. Dilan smiled in approval; glad her friend had gotten some sleep. She was surprised that he did though. His insomnia had been brutal lately. Wonder what changed?
Looking at the position of the sun she surmised that it was roughly an hour before people would start waking up and getting ready, Levi had taught her how to tell the time with the sun a while ago, claiming it was a good skill to have on expeditions.
She wanted Levi to get as much sleep as he could, so Dilan quietly stood up and tip toed over to the exit. She was about to open the door before she remembered it had the creakiest hinges in the world and frowned. That would definitely wake him up. Sighing, Dilan spared a glance to Levi before walking over to the ledge of the building and climbing over the side. She grabbed onto a window ledge with two hands, shimming her into the centre before letting go, gritting her teeth with effort as she grabbed onto the next window ledge. Luckily the windows went all the way down to the floor, so it was like a fucked-up ladder of sorts. She knew she had enough strength to do this, having done it plenty of times in the underground before. A few minutes later and she reached the bottom, sighing in relief and wiping the sweat off her forehead. She frowned as she glanced down at her fingertips that were rather blistered and shrugged to herself. It was a price she was willing to pray if Levi got another hour of sleep. Even an hour of sleep is priceless to an insomniac. Her brother had told her that once.
Dilan dusted the dirt off of her hands before walking back into the building and heading to the showers. Now she just had to pray that Levi would stay asleep for as long as possible.
LEVI'S P.O.V.
Levi frowned as he cracked open his eyes. When the fuck did he fall asleep? How the fuck did he fall asleep? He wasn't lying before. He never fell asleep on expedition night. Never. It was virtually impossible. What changed?
Levi glanced around him tiredly, his eyes widening when he realised it was late. People should already be having breakfast right now. Groaning in annoyance, Levi raked a hand through his hair and turned to where the brat should have been, finding her missing. Was last night a dream? Did she even come up here? He wasn't sure what was real anymore if he could fall asleep on expedition night. He used to think there would be a better chance of pigs flying. He couldn't deny that he felt well rested though. It was fucking glorious and exactly what he needed to get through the day.
Levi was about to stand and get some answers when the roof door creaked open and the brat came through holding a plate of food. Levi raised an eyebrow as she grinned at him, coming closer and putting the food down next to him. Levi gave her a deadpan look.
"What the fuck. Did you drug me or something?" He questioned. Dilan laughed, running a hand through her freshly washed hair.
"Thanks for the idea. But no. Not this time. I woke up and you were sleeping so I decided to let you sleep a bit longer. Simple. Now eat, you're going to be late." Dilan urged. Levi gave her an exasperated look.
"I wouldn't be late if you had fucking woken me up on time!" He snapped. Dilan rolled her eyes.
"Well you still would have fallen asleep and woken up at this time if I wasn't there last night, right? The only difference here is, you have food, so you don't have to waste time at the mess hall." Dilan said logically. Levi scowled at her. He fucking hated it when she made sense. But was that really true? Would he still have fallen asleep if Dilan was here? She seemed to be the only changing variable. Still, he was wasting time with these thoughts.
"Fine. Thanks." He sighed, picking up the roll and inspecting it before taking a bite. He glanced at Dilan before shoving the plate her way, it only had an apple left. "I don't eat much. You take it." He said simply. Dilan pursed her lips.
"You should eat more." She countered. Levi rolled his eyes.
"What are you, my mother?" He grumbled. Dilan laughed, pinching his cheek.
"If it helps. Be a good little shit and eat your food." She said in a mothering tone. Levi grimaced and slapped the hand away from him.
"Fucking weirdo." He glared but picked up the apple after he finished the roll anyway. Dilan smirked in victory and Levi tried hard to ignore the warmth in his chest. Why did the brat care so much? He wasn't used to people caring about him on a personal level. He was simply humanities strongest; people didn't think that he could have normal problems. He was starting to think that Dilan was the only person who saw him as human.
"Nervous for today?" Dilan questioned softly, bringing him out of his thoughts. She was looking out at the view a contented expression on her face.
"Not for me." He replied truthfully. He never died. It was an annoying habit of his. No matter the odds he was always the last one standing. Levi still wasn't sure if he preferred it that way. Dilan smiled slightly.
"Well I have a promise to keep so I'll be fine. Let's take care of the squad though, yeah? Don't tell him I told you so but Toby's a bit nervous." Dilan said standing. Levi ignored the relief he felt hearing her mention their promise again and quirked an eyebrow as he stood too.
"Isn't he always nervous?" Levi questioned blankly. Dilan chuckled and shrugged.
"True. Come on, hurry up." She urged, impatiently. Levi rolled his eyes, picking up the empty plate and they started heading down the stairs. Levi hadn't felt so well rested in years. He looked over to Dilan and frowned slightly in thought. Did he really sleep so well because Dilan was with him? There was no denying Levi felt more at ease around her, maybe it was something to do with that. Something caught Levi's eye and he narrowed his eyes at the plasters wrapped around the tips of Dilan's fingers. Those weren't there last night.
"What happened there?" Levi asked. Dilan looked at him and he motioned to her hands. The brat looked down at her hands and tensed slightly in realisation.
"Oh. Nothing." She chuckled nervously, scratching the back of her head. Levi rolled his eyes, knowing whenever she did that something was normally up. It was a nervous habit of hers and it often reminded him of someone.
"Bullshit." He replied, grabbing her hand and inspecting it.
"Levi, I'm fine!" She whined trying to pull her hand back. Levi observed her with narrowed eyes before letting the hand go.
"Tch. Just tell me what happened. Did you get in a fight?" He asked, mentally preparing to find the bastard and teach him a lesson. Dilan never started fights without reasons. She rolled her eyes.
"No." She huffed, crossing her arms. Levi scowled, she rarely ever held back information from him these days. What was she hiding?
"Why are you keeping something from me?" He questioned curiously. Dilan glared at him.
"Because this is not important. You don't need to know every single detail of my life. You're not my boyfriend." She snapped. Levi grit his teeth in annoyance. Why was she being such a bitch today?
"Fully aware. Fine, pissed off back to the squad then. I have shit to do." He snapped back, turning to head towards his room.
"Gladly." She mumbled, walking the other direction. Levi scowled at no one, shutting his door with slightly more force than necessary when he got back in his room and raking a hand through his hair.
Why had her comment irked him so much? They got into spats like that all the time but that had really pissed him off. Why? Was he just pissed because Dilan was keeping something from him or was it something more? Either way he was in a foul mood which got even fouler as he looked at the time and realised, he didn't have time to have a shower before he needed to be down at the quadrangle. Still, he had gotten some sleep so he couldn't pout about it too much. He would be sweaty and dirty by the end of the day and need another shower anyway. Levi tried hard not to grimace at the thought.
Stripping himself quickly, he changed into a new uniform, clipping the survey corps green cloak around his shoulders and strapping on his 3DMG. He grabbed his saddle bag that he packed yesterday and stuck a knife in his belt before opening the door and heading down to the quadrangle where everyone was nervously milling about it. He saw no sign of Dilan, not that he wanted to talk to her right now, so he simply grabbed his horse, saddling it and leading it out towards where some of the squad were already gathered.
"Levi." Mike greeted. Levi nodded in response, glancing over to Toby who was being comforted by Tabitha. The boy was sweating buckets. Guess Dilan wasn't lying when she said the kid was nervous. "You didn't make it to breakfast this morning." Mike commented. Levi gave him a bored look.
"No. I didn't." He replied simply, not intending on continuing this conversation. He had other things on his mind. Where was Dilan anyway?
"Blunt as always." Mike mumbled, earning himself a glare before the shaggy blonde remembered something. "Oh, Erwin was looking for you. And Dilan. He said to meet him at the gate, I think Dilan's already there." Mike recalled. Levi gave him a dead pan look. Now he remembers. We've been standing here for 5 minutes. Levi rolled his eyes internally.
"Yes, sir." He replied briefly, mounting his horse and riding around the crowds of people. It was a long way to the gate, but his eyes widened when he saw what was happening in front of it. Dilan seemed to be yelling at Erwin and she looked royally pissed off. He quickened his pace as one of Erwin's guards tried to restrain her and she flipped him onto the ground. Levi got of the horse and ran over in time to pull Dilan away before another guard could touch her and she could knock another guard down.
"Get the fuck off!" Dilan squirmed, panicking and Levi turned her round, placing steadying hands on her shoulders and observing the relief in her eyes when she realised it was just him.
"Take a breath and calm down. They won't touch you again." Levi calmed quietly. Dilan hesitated but took a deep breath and relaxed, the tension dripping out of her shoulders. Levi nodded in approval. "Good. Now anyone care to tell me what the fuck is going on?" Levi frowned, looking directly at Erwin. Dilan doesn't get that pissed easy; he must have done something.
"Well Levi-" Erwin started as the guards picked themselves up and backed off a bit, looking at Dilan nervously.
"That bastard is pulling us out of the squad." Dilan cut him off, gritting her teeth, fury in her tone. Levi furrowed his brows in confusion, looking to Erwin.
"I'm simply recruiting the both of you to guard the centre ranks and the workers who are building the tree platforms. If the formation is broken and titans attack the centre, we need our best soldiers to protect us." Erwin explained. Levi's eyes widened a fraction.
"By us you mean fat ass higher ups who can't defend themselves right?!" Dilan growled.
"Watch your tone, cadet." Erwin replied sternly. Dilan rolled her eyes and let out a humourless laugh.
"If you were smart Erwin, you would put your best soldiers on the outer circle so they can stop the titans before they have the chance to break through the ranks!" She accused and Levi had to admit she had a point. Erwin crossed his arms.
"There's not enough good men to cover the ground. The titans are going to get through, it's enviable. Why do you think there's an outer flank in the first place?" Erwin replied. Both Levi and Dilan were taken aback as they realised what he was saying.
"You're using them to buy time. You don't expect the outer flank to make it back." Levi stated and Erwin didn't defend himself. Dilan turned absolutely murderous and lunged at Erwin. Levi was barely able to hold her back as the guards unsheathed their blades.
"You sick fuck! Your sending all those people to their deaths and you don't give a shit!" She accused. Again, Erwin didn't defend himself.
"You have orders, you are required to follow them. I suggest you stop being difficult, cadet, before we are forced to restrain you." Erwin threatened as the guards took a step closer. Dilan tensed slightly and Levi glared at Erwin.
"Back off, Erwin. There's no need for that." Levi said seriously.
"Is there not? Was she not about to attack me before you intervened?" He said with a slight smirk. Levi clenched his jaw in annoyance. "I am ordering you and your subordinate to protect the centre flank. Are you disobeying, team leader?" Erwin asked lowly. Levi clenched his fist, glancing at Dilan who was looking at him desperately before back at the commander.
"No sir. We will do as ordered." Levi replied firmly, trying his hardest to ignore Dilan's look of frustration. Of course, he agreed with her and of course he wanted to back her up but if he kept disobeying Erwin every five seconds there were sure to be consequences. Erwin smiled, giving Dilan a smug look that made Dilan look like she wanted to rip his head off.
"Splendid. Let's get moving then. You'll both ride up front with us. I will send a cadet to inform your squad of the change in plans." Erwin said briefly before walking towards his horse. The guards reluctantly sheathed their blades and followed him.
"What the fuck, Levi?!" Dilan hissed, pushing him away from her.
"There's nothing we can do, we have orders." He replied, not liking the look she was giving him. She was disappointed, he could feel it. Dilan scoffed.
"Orders can eat my shit. The squad are in the second defence, Levi! What happens when the titans break through after finishing with the first line and start munching up on the others for fucking desert!" She spat. Levi clenched his jaw.
"You think I'm not worried either? I'm not that sick. But we have orders and we're both on thin ice as it is. The squad will be fine, they know how to handle themselves." Levi reasoned. Dilan glared at him.
"I cannot believe your taking that bastards side. You know I'm right about this." She growled. Levi crossed his arms and glared back.
"Why should I take your side over the commanders. You're not my girlfriend." He threw her words right back in her face. Dilan gave him a disgusted look.
"This isn't a piss contest. This is bigger than the two of us or the commander. Good people are going to die." She said seriously before turning on her heel, walking over to her horse. Levi grit his teeth and raked a hand through this hair while he watched he walk away for a second.
"Fuck." Levi cursed, walking over to his own horse. Now he felt guilty and worried and regretful. Wonderous combination.
He mounted his horse and rode over to the group. They were at the higher end of the long line, Dilan was a few horses up from him, refusing to even glance in his direction. Levi sighed feeling the guilt pang in his stomach. Why did the brat always make him feel so guilty when he was his usual dicky self? Why did he care whether she was mad at him or not? It was exhausting having a real friend.
"Hey shorty!" A loud voice said from behind him and Levi groaned in annoyance.
"Not today, shitty glasses." He grumbled as she rode up to his side. Hanji laughed.
"Lovers quarrel?" She teased, jutting her head towards Dilan. Levi frowned and ignored her. "Come on Levi, I just saw you fighting. What's up?" She said in a more serious tone. Levi sighed, raking a hand through his hair.
"She's pissed I took the commanders side." He mumbled, not even sure why he was talking to the crazy shit. Hanji hummed in understanding.
"About leaving the squad. Yes, Erwin told me about that. I didn't think it would go down very well with Dil or you honestly." Hanji mused. Levi sighed again.
"Obviously it's bullshit. Erwin's a sick bastard." Levi gritted. Hanji blinked at him.
"So, you agreed with Dilan?" Hanji asked. Levi nodded. "And you still took Erwin's side anyway?" She asked, a small smirk on her lips. Levi frowned but nodded again. Hanji laughed a bit.
"What?" He snapped.
"She's not pissed you took Erwin's side. She's pissed you didn't take your own." Hanji explained insightfully. Levi's eyes widened a fraction in realisation. Shit, she's right. The gate creaked open and Erwin commanded them forward.
"Too late now." Hanji shrugged. Levi looked at Dilan. He wanted to apologise, he didn't want to start an expedition while fighting, his head would be all over the place. "Is Dil okay though?" Hanji asked out of nowhere. Levi raised an eyebrow.
"Why do you ask?" He questioned. Hanji chuckled.
"Just saw some weird behaviour this morning. Does she often climb down the front of 4 story buildings?" Hanji asked, amused. Levi blinked.
"What?" He asked. Hanji nodded.
"Yeah, I saw her climbing down from the roof this morning. Any idea why?" Hanji asked and Levi frowned slightly in confusion. That must be why her hands were all scratched up. Why would she... wait. Did the brat climb down the side of a fucking building so I could get another hour of sleep? Why the fuck would she do something so reckless? Because she's the brat that's why. She's constantly putting everyone over herself. Fuck, I'm a dick. He was curious to how the brat had gotten down without waking him up, they both knew how loud that door was, having opened it a lot going up there every other night. Then I gave her all that shit about it. She was just trying to help me. My god, I'm such a fucking asshole. "Levi?" Hanji snapped him out of his thoughts.
"No clue." He replied, monotoned.
He had to apologise, he thought as they rode to Shiganshina.
"SCOUTS, READY YOURSELVES!" Erwin started yelling as the gate was lifted.
He just needed to find the time.
"TODAY WE BEGIN THE 43rd SCOUTING EXPEDITION."
Hopefully before they both died.
"ONWARDS!"
DILAN'S P.O.V.
"Gladly." Dilan grumbled, pursing her lips as she walked away from the annoying man. She knew she was being slightly bitchy, but he wasn't dropping it. She didn't want him to know she climbed down a building just so he could sleep a bit more. Sure, it was no big deal to her, she had climbed down plenty of buildings before, but Levi would likely scold her for being stupid and reckless and she didn't want to deal with that right now. Yes, her 'boyfriend' comment was slightly unfair. He was just being a concerned friend, but she wanted him to stop pushing and it was the only comment that came to mind. In her defence, it worked, but it didn't stop the guilty feeling from spreading through her stomach the minute she walked away.
She would find him before they set off and try to straighten it out. She didn't want to start an expedition while they were in the middle of a pissing contest. Despite their promise it would be a miracle if they both came out of it alive, her especially. She knew she would do her best to keep breathing for Levi but if one of her friends were in danger, she would do anything to save them. Even if that meant sacrificing herself for them. Her only hope would be that Levi doesn't hold it against her too heavily when they meet again in the afterlife. But even then, that would depend if he ended up in hell. Dilan knew that was where she was going. No doubt about that.
As soon as she got out into the quadrangle, Tabitha grabbed her and pulled her to the side. Dilan grew serious as soon as she saw the distraught look on her friend's face.
"What's wrong?" She asked immediately. Tabitha swallowed, her face paling slightly.
"I-I-I just... okay, I know this is crazy but-" She cut herself off, biting her lip. Dilan had never seen Tabitha this scared before.
"Tabs, just tell me." She encouraged gently. She silently cursed herself for not finding the squad this morning to make sure they were doing okay. She barely managed a shower and packing before grabbing some food and running back up to the roof to wake Levi. She hadn't seen them yet. Tabitha took a breath to calm down.
"An hour before first call, Toby woke me up. He was completely hysterical, telling me Brand had some kind of a fit or something." Tabitha explained. Dilan raised an eyebrow. A fit? She guessed the boys bunked in the same room together. "I pulled on some clothes and ran down there with him. Brand was there and Johnson was trying to talk him down. H-he-" Tabitha cut herself off, blinking back the tears. Dilan squeezed her hands to comfort her. "He was standing on the window ledge crying. He was going to jump Dil!" Tabitha sniffed and Dilan's eyes widened. That didn't sound like Brand. Not one bit.
"What happened?" She asked quickly, keeping her voice even. Tabitha wiped her eyes.
"Me and Johnson grabbed him since he wasn't listening to reason. We held him down until he snapped out of whatever the hell he was in the middle of. He's been shaky ever since and he keeps freaking out. A-apparently, he had this dream. We all died today on the expedition. Every single one of us. He-he said it felt so real." Tabitha explained. Dilan sighed in relief, knowing Brand was okay. The dream was rather troubling though.
"Nerves can concoct a lot of crazy things, Tabs. I'm sure it was just a dream." Dilan comforted, sensing it had rattled Tabitha quite a bit too. She nodded quickly. "Where is he now?" Dilan asked. Tabitha grabbed her hand without a word and led her into the stables. They moved towards the back of the torch lit structure until they found a stall with Toby, Brand and Johnson. Brand was sitting on a hay bale. His skin was slick with sweat and his hands were shaking as he leant his head between his knees and rocked back and forth. Shit, he looks bad. Toby and Johnson were trying to talk to him.
"Brand, we've all had dreams of the titans." Johnson tried.
"Yeah, and we're all on edge so-" Toby tried but Brand cut him off.
"IT WAS REAL!" He hissed. Toby flinched a bit. "It was real, it was real, it was fucking real. We're all going to die; we're all going to die." He sobbed quietly, hugging himself with shaky hands as he continued to rock. The others looked horrified at his condition, not knowing what to do. Dilan had been there though.
"Guys, can you give us a minute." Dilan whispered to the group. They were reluctant but nodded and left the stall, heading down the stable hallway. Brand kept his head hidden. Dilan took a breath; well aware she was going to have to let Brand invade her personal space in order to comfort him. Still, they were friends. She had to help him out or his fear would kill him today.
Dilan steeled herself and sat down on the hay bale next to him.
"I'm not crazy." Brand whispered. Dilan smiled sadly and pat him on the back.
"I know, bud. If you think it's real no one has a fucking right to say otherwise." She comforted. Brand sniffed and lifted his head to look at at her with teary emerald eyes.
"Y-you believe me?" He asked shakily. Dilan smiled in reassurance.
"I believe you saw what you did. I believe dreams can be warnings. I've had more than a few over the years, you've just got to learn how to interpret them. Want to tell me about it?" She asked kindly. Brand wiped his face, looking nervous. Dilan took a mental breath and reached over, squeezing his hand gently while reminding herself over and over that Brand was her friend and he would never try to hurt her. Brand dropped the tension in his shoulders and let out a breath, calming down a bit.
"W-we were in the forest... a-and this horde came out of nowhere. T-they were abnormals, there was too many to fight them. I watched everyone die, it was so real. They all died, and I was left alone. Then a titan grabbed me a-and I s-swear I felt the pain as it bit me in half." Brand gulped, looking at the wall with wide scared eyes. Dilan blinked. No wonder he's freaked.
"And you think it's going to happen." Dilan said carefully. Brand bit his lip and nodded looking dangerously close to a panic attack. "I have dreams too you know." She said gently. Brand looked at her.
"R-really?" He asked. Dilan nodded. "Like what?" He sniffed. Dilan didn't really want to tell him, but she needed him to calm the fuck down.
"Well, back in the underground. Once, I dreamed there was a man who tried to rob me and ended up stabbing me." She explained. Brand blinked.
"And he did?" He asked, nervously. Dilan smiled reassuringly.
"There was a man with a knife. He tried to rob me but thanks to the dream I felt more prepared. Sure, I was on edge, but the edge was good. When he lunged, I was ready for him and I escaped with my money without a scratch." She said cheerfully, noticing Brands relief. "See, dreams like that can be scary and, in your gut, you know they mean something. But dreams don't dictate the future. Psychics aren't real, it's all bullshit. Only you can define your future. So yes, this dream may mean something, but you don't have to let it scare you. Use it. Use the edge to keep you sharp. You're in charge of your destiny, Brand." She said seriously. Brand looked close to tears again but smiled gratefully, nonetheless. He blushed a bit looking into her eyes, averting his gaze to their interlocked hands.
"Thank you, Dil. You really are amazing." He replied. Dilan smiled.
"I'm not. But I'm glad you're feeling better." She replied simply. Brand smiled and nodded.
"Yeah... I um. I don't know if you know this- I guess I've probably made it a bit obvious." He blushed, scratching the back of his neck nervously. Dilan blinked at him. "I guess for a while now... I've kind of- kind of had um..." he cleared his throat, turning a decent shade of red. "Kind of had feelings for you." He managed to force out the words. Dilan's eyes turned wide. She was not expecting that. Brand chanced a glance and cringed at her shocked expression, forcing a nervous laugh. "Totally stupid right? I mean why would you like me back? Sorry, probably made thing super awkward now-" he started rambling and tried to let go of Dilan's hand, but she held onto it.
"Brand." She cut him off kindly, over the shock. She probably always knew deep down. Brand always looked at her differently. Brand swallowed nervously and managed to meet her eyes. "Listen to me. You are an amazing person. I would be lucky to have you, but the truth is... I'm too fucked up right now. I know this sounds like I'm making excuses, but something happened to me in the past." She took a shaky breath, averting her eyes. "I was assaulted, and it fucked up my head. I know you would never do anything to me, but it doesn't matter. I'm struggling to sit on this seat with you right now... it hurts me to get close to people. It's no one's fault, it's just the way I am. You're too good for me anyway but I'm not psychologically ready for a relationship and I'm not sure if I ever will be. It sucks but it's the way it is. I'm sorry, please don't... stop being my friend." She whispered the last bit, tears clinging to the edges of her eye. She couldn't help it. It still hurt to admit, and she wasn't sure how he was taking it, she still hadn't been able to look at him. There was a moment of silence before Brand spoke up.
"Can I hug you?" He asked softly. Dilan blinked and looked up at him seeing there was no resentment or disgust in his eyes. He was simply smiling sadly, clearly wanting to comfort her. Dilan sniffed, mulling it over. She could probably deal with one hug, right? She couldn't be scared of the boy when he was looking at her with such loving eyes. There were no ill intentions there. Dilan managed a nod and Brand gently pulled her into a hug. Dilan tensed instinctively before relaxing into it, knowing she was safe. This was a big step on her part, and it brought a small smile out on her face.
"You're not mad?" She whispered. Even if she had done it with reason, she had still rejected the boy's affections.
"No. There's nothing to be mad about. I'm sorry about what happened to you and I wish things were different, but you can't help the way you feel. You know I'll support you no matter what." He replied gently. Dilan smiled at the comforting words, a rogue tear falling down her cheek as she hugged her friend a bit tighter.
"Thanks. You'll make a more stable girl really happy one day, Brand." She joked lightly. Brand chuckled a bit and pulled back to smile at her.
"Maybe. I still like to think that one day me and you could give it a shot though. Maybe once the war is over. I think it would be pretty epic." He smirked. Dilan chuckled, wiping her eyes. She knew she didn't have feelings like that for Brand, but she couldn't deny he was handsome and kind. The perfect boyfriend of sorts. If she wasn't so messed up, perhaps it would have been epic.
"Maybe." She replied kindly, her heart-warming at the wide smile that filled Brands face.
"Thanks for talking me down. You're a good friend to help me out, even if it was uncomfortable for you." He added, looking slightly guilty. Dilan smiled quickly to reassure him.
"It's easier with you guys than complete strangers. Besides, I think we just made some pretty good steps. That hug didn't freak me out at all." She smiled. Brand chuckled.
"Good. I'm glad." He said kindly. Dilan nodded her thanks and stood up with a contented sigh, feeling a little less weight on her chest.
"Could you... not tell the others. Tabitha and Levi know but the boys don't." Dilan explained. Brand nodded, standing up too.
"Course." He smiled. Dilan smiled her thanks back. "Wait... is that why Tabitha and Levi are always pulling me and the others away from you?" Brand asked exasperated. Dilan chuckled nervously, scratching the back of her head.
"Kind of... yeah. Sorry." She apologised awkwardly. Brand laughed and shook his head.
"No, no. I should be apologising. I had no idea I was making you uncomfortable. It's nice to know Tabitha doesn't hate me though. For a good while I thought her, and Levi had something against me." Brand chuckled. Dilan smirked and shook her head.
"Nothing more than the usual, idiot." She teased, smirking as Brand frowned. "Come on, let's get out there and save humanity, yeah?" She encouraged. Brand smiled, determination in his eyes.
"Yep. I'm in control of my future." He stated proudly. Dilan chuckled, nodding.
"Yep. Let's kick some titan ass!" She yelled, making Brand laugh.
They saddled up their horses, leading them out to the group where they were waiting nervously, not knowing Brands improved condition yet.
"E-everything okay?" Toby asked nervously. Dilan looked to Brand who smiled in reassurance and the squad sighed in relief.
"Yeah, sorry for freaking you guys out. Dilan explained that while dreams can be warnings, they don't have any power. If we stay sharp, we can stay alive." He said with a grin and the others perked up a bit, smiling back.
"That's the spirit." Johnson laughed. Tabitha gave Dilan a thankful look.
"We got each other's backs. As long as we stick together, we'll be fine." Dilan reassured the group and they nodded in understanding. Dilan smiled, pleased with everyone anxiety levels.
"A-are you cadet D-Dilan, Mike's squad?" A timid voice sounded behind her and Dilan turned, blinking at a small cadet, most likely a runner under Erwin's station. He flinched under her gaze and Dilan imagined he had heard the rumours about herself. She resisted the urge to roll her eyes and simply nodded. "I was instructed to deliver a message. Commander Erwin w-wants to speak with you, and Team Leader Levi, immediately." He added. Dilan scrunched up her face in confusion and blinked as the tiny cadet ran off again.
"The fuck does eyebrows want?" She muttered to herself, walking towards her horse.
"What'd you do now?" Johnson teased. The squad laughed as Dilan sent him a playful glare.
"Ha-Ha." She deadpanned. "Nothing, I think. Guess, I'll find out in a sec." She shrugged, mounting her horse.
"Get back soon though, we'll be heading off and you need to be in formation." Tabitha warned. Dilan smiled in reassurance.
"I'll be back. Did you guys remember to fill your canteens?" She raised a sceptical eyebrow, rolling her eyes as all of them cringed. Idiots.
"We'll go now." Johnson offered, looking to Brand. Dilan nodded in approval as the pair collected everyone canteens and walked towards HQ. Dilan only asked them because she remembered their complaining from last time. She, Levi and Mike were the only ones who remembered to fill their canteens.
"Hey Tabs." Dilan whispered to her friend and the girl got closer. "Toby still looks a little worried." She informed, glancing over to the boy who was fiddling with his buckles with shaky hands. Tabitha smiled and nodded, patting Dilan on the thigh.
"I got this, underground girl. Hurry back, okay?" She smiled. Dilan nodded, smiling as she patted her friend on the head before turning her horse and riding towards the front. I wonder what the bastard wants.
30 minutes later and she was in a foul mood, riding across the fields outside the gates. She noticed Levi trying to make eye contact with her and blatantly ignored him, speeding up a bit to buy time before the Commander announced the order for them to go into the long distance scouting formation and she took her position at one side of the higher ups clump while Levi took the other. Erwin was at the front, shielded by his guards and there were a few more elites at the back of this part of the formation.
Dilan watched as numerous scouts rode in front of them or to the side. Dilan wondered how many would come back alive. Just how many soldiers would die thanks to Erwin's ideas of the greater good. Shit, this is fucking barbaric. What the hell am I supposed to do though? All Dilan wanted was to be with the squad. She had just promised she had all their backs. They were nervous before and that was when herself and Levi were riding right next to them, now they were on their own. They were much more vulnerable, even with Mike's good leadership, and Dilan couldn't guarantee their safety anymore.
Her stomach was a pile of knots and her brain was clouded with anger at a certain asshole. She knew he agreed with her, so why didn't he voice his real opinion. Taking Erwin's side was cowardly and something Dilan didn't expect from her friend. He may be an ass sometimes, but Levi had never been a coward before. Was he just trying to get back at her from this morning when she refused to tell him the origin of her hand injuries? He had thrown her insult right back in her face and it pissed her off to no end. This wasn't about them. This was about saving lives and doing the right thing. Why couldn't Levi see that?
It took a good few hours to get to the dark forest. Luckily from what she could interpret from the smoke signals, there hadn't been many casualites so far. As much as she hated to be here, it was rather interesting at the centre of the formation. Erwin may be a bastard but re-routing the formations position in his head everytime a flare went of was rather genius to watch. It was so fascinating Dilan didn't realise they were close until Erwin ordered them to slow down to a trot.
"Commander?!" One of the higher up clumps yelled. Dilan rolled her eyes instinctively. What a bunch of assholes. These were the guys that wanted high positions but couldn't cut it with the MP's so they latched onto the survey corps like leaches, sucking out money without actually doing any work. They have the most protected position in the formation. Dilan would bet her life on the fact that not a single one of these fat slobs had ever taken down a titan.
Erwin hung back a bit to glance at his 'advisors'.
"Yes sargent Dods?" Erwin asked. Dilan saw the slimy man, who was slick with sweat despite not doing any work take a dirty glance in her direction.
"I'm curious as to why an unstable individual such as the savage is allowed the honour of guarding the higher ups?" He asked, privilege practically radiating out of his nearly bald head. Dilan scoffed, not being able to help herself. No way was she being critised for being somewhere forced against her will. "Something to say, girl?" He snapped, catching her mockery. Dilan glared at him, ignoring the look from Levi to drop it since these guys could very well send her back to the underground. There were 10 of them, one of Erwin and Erwin wasn't exactly on her side either.
"She doesn't." Erwin said sternly. "Ignore her, Dods. She's here to do her job because she is one of the most skilled in the regiment. It's that foul temper she has to sort out." Erwin spoke to Dods like she wasn't present although he may as well have been throwing the words directly at her face. Dilan growled under her breath as the Sargant huffed but didn't retort.
"Do one, dickless." Dilan muttered quietly, rolling her eyes as they haulted outside of the forest. Dilan was confused as to why there were stopping. It's not like the other squads needed orders. Everyone was briefed at were their post was.
The higher ups would ride to the centre flank in the middle of the forest, followed by the workers who were being escorted on carts by the second flank. From there everyone would file out into their positions. There were three circles, protecting the central flank. When the workers were done with one area of the forest, Erwin would fire a flare and the formation would move accordingly, never breaking form. This mean that, if they last that long, part of the first flank will end up on the fields on the ground with no protection from the trees. Even thinking about it made Dilan sick. They'll be sitting ducks. Not that the first flank had it much better the rest of the time. They were required to keep the titans at bay, engaging with any ones they could find. Dilan knew Erwin wouldn't risk making any good soldiers titan bait meaning were going fresh cadets. They'll drop like flies. Dilan would be surprised if half the troops made it back alive in total.
"Levi, Dilan. Take front. The outer squads should have cleared most of the titans but we shouldn't leave anything to chance." Erwin commanded. Dilan frowned in annoyance at the uselessness of the people around her but grit her teeth and didn't retort as she urged her horse on, heading past Erwin, stopping at the front. Levi joined her side a few seconds later and she still refused to look at him. Maybe they would be with the squad right now if he had some balls. "Onward." Erwin ordered and the centre flank broke into another trot, Dilan and Levi slightly ahead of the rest, keeping a sharp eye out for any titans.
It was a good 10 minutes before Levi decided to acknowledge the elephant in the room.
"Are you seriously going to ignore me forever?" Levi questioned, annoyed. Dilan ignored him and inadvertently gave him her answer. She heard an frustrated sigh from the raven. "Walls, Dil, just fucking let me-" Levi tried again but Dilan heard something and cut him off.
"Shut up." She said quickly, listening out. Levi gave her a furious glare.
"Fucking kidding me. I'm trying to-" He hissed but Dilan cut him off again, looking at him with serious fiery eyes.
"Seriously Levi. Shut up and listen." Dilan warned. Levi frowned slightly but did as he was told. They slowed their horses down to a walk as they listened out. Dilan heard the swirling of the wind, rusting the branches and clenched her jaw feeling a shiver run up her spine. Levi tensed telling her he felt it too. Something was around them. They werent alone.
"What's the hold up?!" Erwin yelled. Dilan turned around to tell him to shut the fuck up but her eyes widened as she saw a massive face looming to Erwin's right.
"Fuck! GET DOWN. NOW!" She yelled and Erwin just managed to swerve as the titan lunge and snapped it's jaw closed around the torso of a higher up.
"ARGH!" The group screamed collectively as the titan stood up, identifying itself as a 13 metre class, swallowing the rest of the man's, now limp, body down its gullet.
"Dilan." Levi said simply and Dilan nodded.
"On it." She sprang up onto her horse and switched to 3DMG the same time as Levi.
"SWITCH TO 3DGM. GET HIGH. NOW!" Levi ordered as the higher ups were frozen, looking up at the beast. Levi's command seemed to get through to them though as they zipped up higher into the trees to safety apart from one stubborn bastard who either had forgotten how to use 3DMG after sitting on his ass for so long or thought he could escape the beast his own way. Which higher up, you ask? Dods, of course.
Dilan watched as the idiot turned his horse around and attempted to escape back the way they had came, ignoring Levi's order, getting himself grabbed as another titan appeared out of nowhere.
"AH! HELP! HELP!" Dods screamed. Dilan and Levi were already speeding through the air. However it was hard to get to the screaming higher up as the first large titan was blocking them, grabbing and swiping. Dilan had to drop to the floor to avoid being crushed by the thing. "PLEASE!" He screamed.
"Go! I'll distract it!" Dilan yelled at Levi, having to raise her voice over the loud roar of the titans. Levi was looked reluctant but Dilan didn't give him the chance to reply as she shot herself up towards the 13 meters faces like a bullet, swiping at it's face to gain it's attention and managing to pull back in time as the creature clapped its hands, trying to crush her. It turned to her completely, lunging and clamping it's teeth like a while animal. Dilan dodged and Levi managed to get past it, going to help the higher up. Dilan supposed he was still alive from all the screaming.
Dilan was brought out of her musings as the creature bashed it's hand against a tree, missing her by a hair.
"Fuck." She hissed, twisting out of the way and grappling to her right. The beast was right on her ass. She needed to get some space. "Alright you tall shit." She spat. It's arms were waving around madly trying to grab her. It's movements freakishly fast thanks to it's abnormal nature. So she had to go below. Dilan dodged another grab as she dived, the wind hitting her face at the velocity she was dropping at. She grapped to the creatures leg, arching her back and propelling herself upwards, using her gas to push her into a spinning motion as she reached the height of the nape and drove out a large chunk of flesh. Hot steam and blood sprayed her face and she hooked to a tree, breathing heavily as the beast fell to the ground.
She watched it steam, a twisted smirk working it's way onto her face. She was starting to like killing titans. It wasn't the same rush as murdering scum but it was close. Close enough to satisfy her frustrations.
Snapping out of her psychopathic musings, Dilan sped back towards the pathway, racing round the bushes that blocked Dilan's view from the others in time to almost crash into Levi. Luckily they both twisted out of the way of each other in time.
"Fuck, brat." Levi breathed, hooking to a branch and dropping to the ground. Dilan followed, wiping some titan blood off of her face. As much as she was mad at him, she was glad he was alive. "Dealt with the 13 metre then?" Levi asked, an impressed tone in his monotoned voice. Dilan nodded, looking around him to see the fat ass Dods crying on the floor next to a steamy titan as Erwin's guards helped him up and everyone came down from the trees, calling their horses.
"You should have let him get eaten." She mused darkly. Levi cracked a smirk and shook his head in disbelief before whistling for his horse. Dilan did the same, patting Stealth on the neck before mounting him.
"Maybe he'll follow orders now." Levi grimaced as the sobbing sweaty man was hoisted onto his horse. Dilan scoffed and they got on the move again. Unlikely story.
It didn't take long for them to get to the checkpoint after that. The workers were escorted up into the trees and started unloading their supplies before the second flank soldiers were forced back to their posts. Dilan looked around hoping her squad would be one of the escorts but there was no such luck. They were still on the front lines waiting for danger to pounce on them. It made her sick to think about while she was here, safely sitting against a tree simply waiting for titans to show up. She had left the others a while ago on the excuse of scouting out the perimeter. She knew there were other soldiers doing that, but she just wanted to get away. She had been here for an hour now. She wondered how many lives had been lost so far while the higher ups were relaxing and licking their non-existent wounds.
Dilan grit her teeth in frustration, crossing her arms as the sound of grapples rang through her ears and she felt Levi land on the tree next to her. She didn't acknowledge him. She was still pissed. Levi sighed and sat down next to her.
"I was a coward. I know that. I shouldn't have taken the commanders side just because I'm on probation, and I shouldn't have taken yours either. I should have taken my own because this plan is fucked up. Maybe if I backed you, we would be on the front lines right now instead of sitting here like fucking guard dogs. I'm sorry." Levi said seriously. Dilan hesitated. She was still pissed but the likelihood was that even if Levi had spoken out against Erwin, he still would have forced them into the positions they were in right now though blackmail or other means. Levi would have just delayed the evitable. At least he knew he fucked up, morally speaking. She gave a nod, showing she accepted his apology. Levi sighed in relief and they looked out at the horizon. Dilan clenched her jaw as she heard a distant scream.
"People are fighting out there." She said shakily. It was mentally taxing just sitting here. Levi balled his hands into fists.
"I know." Dilan sighed and stood up as she started to pace the length of the tree branch. It was better than just sitting there like an idiot.
"This is so fucking stupid. Fuck. This is stupid." She mumbled to herself, running her hands through her hair.
"Dilan sit the fuck back down. You're just going to ware yourself out and then you'll be no use to anyone." Levi said logically. Dilan breathed out, turning her gaze to look with his steely eyes. She felt herself calm, if only a little. But there were still people dying horrible deaths like Farlan did. Would Levi answer her question now? Out here... would he answer the question she had been dying to ask him for 6 months. Did you know my brother?
Before Dilan could get the words out of her mouth there was a bright purple flare, telling everyone to reroute to the left. The workers were done with the first set of platforms. If they did this four more times they could go home. Levi stood up and walked to the edge.
"Come on brat. Let's get this over with." He said briefly before jumping off and leaving Dilan no choice but to follow.
A/N: Yo! The expedition has begun. I'm really excited to write this one I have a lot of ideas. Next few chapters are really gonna pick up so get ready.
Once again, thank you for the comments. I love hearing what you think! Thanks for reading. X
