Trigger warning: I normally put these at the bottom (when I remember to) but I wanted to make sure everyone was warned this time. As soon as it switches to Dilan's P.O.V. there's a flashback of a rape scene. If that makes you uncomfortable skip the italics and you'll be fine.
Otherwise hope you enjoy!
LEVI'S P.O.V.
Levi opened open his eyes looking around, confused as to why he was on the sofa before he remembered the night before and sighed a bit in content. Guess the brat was right. He must have been pretty tired. He was glad he listened to her, not that he would tell her that to her face. Levi sat up a bit, blinking at the blanket that was draped over him.
He looked at it, guessing Dilan had covered him after he fell asleep so he wouldn't get cold. Levi felt his heart speed up a bit at the simple kind gesture and his eyes widened in confusion at his own reaction. What the fuck is with me lately? Levi took a breath and rubbed his face, shoving the question down and standing up. Taking a glance at the light shining through the kitchen window, Levi was surprised to see it was late morning. I slept the whole night? I went to sleep early too. Weird.
Still, he brushed it off and was about to head up and get ready before he turned at the sight of the brat curled up on the smaller leather sofa, her arms and knees brought to her chest in a foetal position to generate the most warmth. Her head was resting on a pillow with her eyes firmly closed, her tanned skin illuminated by a shaft of sunlight that broke through a crack in the curtains. Levi swallowed hard, his pulse speeding up a bit again. Levi noticed he had been finding the brat more beautiful every day. Shit. Don't think like that! Levi scolded himself, shaking his head firmly and taking another breath to snap out of whatever the hell that was.
Levi refocused wondering why the hell Dilan hadn't slept in her own room, she looked freezing.
"Idiot." He muttered fondly, draping the blanket over her sleeping form and biting back a smile as Dilan relaxed a bit at the new warmth, smoothing her cheek on the pillow.
Ignoring the endearing display, Levi walked into the tidy kitchen, guessing the brat had cleared up after he fell asleep. A thought came to his head as he grabbed a glass of water, wondering if the reason why he slept the whole night was because Dilan was next to him. It was logical considering the last time he slept well into the morning was the night of the expedition when Dilan met him on the roof and they both slept up there. Odd. Levi couldn't deny he felt more at ease when the brat was around. Was that why his insomnia died down?
A knock on the door brought him out of his musings and he put the glass down, walking over to the door after checking Dilan was still asleep and opening it. He was met with Hanji and instantly frowned. He was having such a decent morning too.
"Is she here?!" Hanji squealed quietly. Levi raised an eyebrow, wondering why Hanji was being so quiet for once. Come to think of it, that normal knock was so un-hanji too.
"Who? Only one other person lives here." Levi replied quietly, not wanting Dilan to wake up. Erwin had given them the day off to make their final decision, so the brat didn't need to get up yet. She seemed to be sleeping peacefully and Levi knew she didn't get much of that these days. He watched as a massive grin broke out on Hanji's face.
"The birthday girl of course! Or should I say yesterday's birthday girl." Hanji sighed, bonking herself on the head. "I can't believe I missed it! What kind of friend am I?" She huffed, annoyed with herself. Levi narrowed his eyes.
"The fuck are you talking about, shithead?" Levi hissed, stepping outside and closing the door behind him so Hanji and him could talk normally. Hanji blinked in confusion. "Dilan's sleeping." He explained, frowning as Hanji smirked, looking him up and down. Levi realised due to his recent waking; his appearance was rather dishevelled. He was in a simple white shirt, the first few buttons undone from yesterday, when they were slaving over paperwork, and uniformed pants. His hair was tousled from sleep and he had no shoes on, thanks to a certain brat. "Wait-" Levi got where she was going to go and wanted to stop it immediately. Unfortunately, he didn't have such luck.
"You and Dilan did it, didn't you?!" She squealed excitedly. Levi supressed a groan and simply glared. God it was too early for this.
"No." He snapped. Hanji scoffed, looking him up and down again.
"Levi come on, your outfit screams 'I've just had sex'." She grinned and Levi's eyes widened in utter mortification. "This is great! I was worried I was going to have to spell it out for you, but it looks like you took matters into your own hands, huh?" She smirked devilishly, crossing her arms. Levi was too shocked to know how to reply.
"Hanji, we didn't-!" Levi tried but Hanji cut him off again.
"Oh yeah? Why else would Dilan be asleep this time of day? Fully exhausted from the throws of passion is the only viable answer." She said shamelessly, pushing up her glasses and Levi balked at her, desperately forcing down a blush as he contemplated burying her alive just to stop this horrifying conversation. He took a deep breath and calmed down. Don't kill her Levi. You just got promoted.
"Listen here, crazy shit. Me and Dilan were debating the cadets for the team all evening yesterday. We passed out on separate sofa's because we were so exhausted. Besides, take away all of that and you know full well Dilan is not ready for something like that with anyone. She only lets me near her because she knows I have no ulterior motives, so you need to stop being so insensitive and make sure you don't bring this up around her. Understood?" Levi said seriously. Hanji frowned a bit in realisation.
"You really didn't do it?" She pouted, completely missing the point. Levi sighed.
"No." He snapped. Hanji rolled her eyes, grabbing Levi's arm and pulling him away from the door. Levi glared and snatched his arm back. "What now?"
"You lost your shit yesterday and we both know it." Hanji started and Levi swallowed, knowing she was right. "We also both know, you have no idea what that feeling was." Hanji continued and Levi couldn't deny he was interested. Maybe he was ill, and Hanji was about to diagnose him. She was a scientist after all.
"Go on." He encouraged, hoping maybe she could give him some pills or something. Hanji smiled.
"Jealousy." She said simply and Levi blinked. Hanji chuckled at his reaction. "You were jealous of Dilan's new male friend. The blonde one, right?" Hanji asked. Levi blinked again, not fully processing.
"I-"
"You only felt the feeling when you saw them together. You don't like how he was looking at Dilan and you don't like how comfortable she was around him. You hate the idea of them in a relationship, don't you?" She smirked and Levi couldn't speak. Everything she was saying was the truth and yet... was he really jealous? He had never experience jealousy before in his life. Hanji put a hand on the near catatonic man's shoulder. "Let me spell it out for you, bud. You like Dilan and therefore thinking of her with another man makes you jealous. It's simple biology." Hanji explained with a shrug. Levi took a moment to contemplate her hypothesis before dismissing it completely.
"I have never heard more bullshit in my life." He decided on finally, pushing Hanji's hand off of his shoulder. Hanji laughed, rolling her eyes and Levi was about to turn and leave her standing there laughing to herself like an idiot before she stopped him.
"Levi, wait!" Hanji called and he turned back around, glancing at his annoying friend.
"What?" He spat angrily. He didn't like the conversation they were having one bit. Hanji pulled a small dark blue box with an orange ribbon wrapped around it from her pocket and extended it to Levi. He took it hesitantly, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "What's this?" He asked.
"I was cleaning my office and I came across Dilan's file this morning and realised her birthday was yesterday. I was hoping to give it to her but if she's asleep I'll just drop by later. Make sure she gets it, yeah?" Hanji asked with a smile. Levi blinked. It was the brat's birthday yesterday? Why didn't she tell me? Levi frowned slightly. He supposed birthdays in the underground weren't really a real thing. Levi had never celebrated his, no matter how many times his friends begged him too. Now that they were gone, he regretted not giving in just once.
"Yeah..." He replied briefly, still looking down at the gift. Hanji smiled and nodded, walking over to her horse and mounting it.
"Thanks, think about what I said, Levi. You're a smart guy, you'll get it eventually. See ya!" She grinned that manic grin, galloping away before Levi could retort.
Levi was left staring after her, a million questions in his head. The biggest one being... Do I like Dilan?
It should be impossible right? He had known the brat for so long, he had never even remotely felt this way before. No. Whatever this was it had happened recently. Maybe it happened after her six months absence. He had missed her a whole fucking lot, longing for her to come back. Maybe somewhere along the road, that longing turned into something else... was it really possible? Was Hanji, right? Did he have feelings for his second in command?
"Nope. Fuck that." Levi shook his head firmly, pocketing Hanji's present he took purposeful strides round the side of the house until he reached a punching back and realised everything onto that poor piece of padded material.
You're a fucking Captain, Levi. For gods' sakes.
PUNCH.
You cannot have feelings for a subordinate.
PUNCH. PUNCH. KICK.
That would make you the biggest idiot in the world.
PUNCH. KICK. PUNCH. PUNCH. PUNCH. PUNCH.
Yes, she's amazing. Yes, she's the only person in this world that you can be yourself around. Yes, you have a lot in common. Yes, you want to be around her 24/7. Yes, that blonde fuck being with her yesterday made you insanely jealous but that doesn't mean-
PUNCH-PUNCH-PUNCH-PUNCH-PUNCH-PUNCH-PUN-
"Shit." Levi breathed heavily as he punched the bag so hard, he punctured the padding and sand came spilling out as the whole thing was dealt with too much force and the bag came flying off of its chains, landing on the floor with an oomph as sand continued to pore. The only sound in the peaceful forest atmosphere apart from Levi's heavy breathing.
Dumbass. You don't like Dilan. Oh no, Hanji was way off base. You're way deeper than that. You love her.
"Fuck." Levi groaned, rubbing his face.
He took a moment, trying hard to deny it. Maybe he just liked the brat instead? A crush seemed more realistic but even he knew he was grasping at straws. He didn't know what it felt like until now. But what he felt for Dilan... how deeply he cared about her... it was love.
Levi cringed at the thought.
He had to push these feelings down. Deep down. Dilan could never know. The only reason she felt as safe around him as she did was because she trusted him not to think about her like that. If Dilan found out he liked her she could take it the wrong way and get uncomfortable. Levi never wanted the brat to feel on edge around him. It would break him.
Besides she was his subordinate. He couldn't be with a subordinate. Those are the rules and they're final. He would get past these annoying feelings if it's the last thing he did.
DILAN'S P.O.V.
"Fuck yeah, this was worth every penny." The man moaned and Dilan bit her lip to stop from crying out at the pain. She wouldn't give him the satisfaction. Focus on the weapon Dilan. The weapon. Ignore everything else around you. She thought repeatedly as her restrained hand reached out for the knife on the belt of the pair of trousers that were hanging precariously over the edge of the bed.
Her breath hitched in her throat as a particularly hard thrust sent a shooting pain up her spine as well as rock the bed and the trousers almost fell off. She whimpered quietly, tears dripping down her face as he licked her neck. Her shaky hands reached out again desperately and her heart jumped in hope as she managed to hook her finger around a belt loop and slowly pull the material towards her.
"You are so fucking lovely! You're my new favourite plaything, I-" His groaning husky voice was cut off with a sharp gasp as Dilan stabbed him straight in the stomach, her orange eyes burning into his with pure unadulterated hatred, twisting the knife as she pushed.
"Feel that?" She whispered at the gaping man, too shocked to move as his blood dripped onto Dilan's bare stomach. "Feel the pain yet?" She continued.
"W-what-" He breathed out shakily. Dilan pulled the knife out and he yelled out before she stabbed him again and he screamed.
"That's what it feels like. That's what you were doing to me." She explained, tears still dripping down her face.
"Help!" He gasped, his voice barely a whisper as Dilan pulled the knife out again and cut the rest of her shackles off. Deadly orange eyes narrowed on the man as he pathetically tried to crawl over to the door, leaving a trail of blood behind him and she laughed a humourless laugh.
"Oh no. We're not done yet." She spat, lifting the knife. She was going to make him see hell if it's the last thing she did.
Dilan woke with a gasp, amber eyes wildly looking around her as she forgot where she was. She was met with an empty lounge and it took her a moment to remember everything. It had been over 9 months now, but it still hurt. She still felt like something was wrong and she always would. Dilan put a hand over her mouth to muffle a sob, blinking back the tears she took a few deep breaths to calm down. You're safe, Dilan. This is an empty house apart from Levi. Levi would never hurt you. He's your best friend. He saved you from that hell. You're safe. Calm the fuck down.
Dilan jumped a bit as the front door opened and closed with a slam. She moved the blanket off of her that Levi had likely put over her and stood up, slowly moving to a different angle cautiously and sighing in relief when she saw it was only Levi leaning on the door. She took a breath and wiped her eyes, calming down and walking towards him. Levi's eyes snapped over to hers from where they had been staring straight in front of him. He looked startled and it faltered Dilan's steps. Levi never looked startled.
"Hey, you alright?" Dilan asked slowly, not liking the look on his face. Why did he look so sweaty, like he had just been working out? What time was it while they were at it? Levi straightened up a bit, raking a hand through his hair and opened his mouth to reply before Dilan caught sight of his knuckles and she gasped. "Holy shit Levi, what happened?" She asked, wide eyed as she closed the distance in a second and taking his hand. It was dripping with red.
Was he in a fight? Who was there to fight out here? Levi didn't answer, not that she gave him much time since he was dripping all over the floor.
"Come here." She tugged on his sleeve, trying to get him to move. She raised an eyebrow as Levi tensed and avoided her eyes. "Levi, what happened? Did you get in a fight?" She asked, gently moving his chin left and right to see if there were any bruises on the sides of his face. Levi finally met her eyes and Dilan saw his adams apple move as he swallowed hard. What was with him?
Dilan was about to try again when Levi snapped out of it and rolled his eyes, taking his hands out of her grip and walked over to the skin, running his hands under cold water.
"Who the fuck is there to fight out here? Use your head, brat." Levi said in his simple monotoned voice. Dilan frowned, not buying it.
"Okay so what happened?" She persisted while Levi busied himself rubbing his hands raw of blood in an aggressive way that must be hurting him. Something was definitely up.
"Training. I went a little overboard." He shrugged. Dilan narrowed her eyes at him. He was hiding something. But his tone told her that was the end of the conversation. Levi wouldn't tell her unless he wanted to. If she kept poking, they would likely just end up in an argument.
"Fine. Whatever." She sighed as Levi turned off the tap and muttered a curse under his breath as blood still continued to drip down his hands. Dilan rolled her eyes and grabbed the first aid kit out of the cupboard, pulling out a chair for him and sitting down opposite as she riffled around for bandages. It wasn't long before she found them and looked up to see Levi standing by the sink, awkwardly holding his bleeding hands. Dilan raised an eyebrow at him. "Sit." She instructed. Levi hesitated.
"I'm fine." He grumbled and moved to leave but Dilan blocked him, royally pissed off now.
"Levi you better sit your ass down in that chair and let me fucking help you before I really lose my shit." She hissed. Levi glared at her and she glared right back. There was a moment of tense silence before Levi gave in and sat down on the chair with a frustrated scoff. Dilan took a breath to calm her annoyance with this man-child before sitting down opposite. "Hand?" She ordered, holding her hand out for his. Levi scrunched up his nose and hesitated again before lifting his hand, which was tightly formed in a fist, blood dripping down the cracks. Dilan sighed. Whatever happened had really gotten to him. Her friend wasn't like this often.
Still, she didn't mention it, taking the fist and gently prying the fingers so his hand was lying flat and she held it in one while she looked for an alcoholic wipe to clean the cuts properly. Who knew what he had been hitting? Dilan ripped open the silver foil with a bit of help from her teeth and pulled out the wipe, cleaning her friend's hand. She looked up to see if she was hurting him, finding his face unsurprisingly stoic but she did notice his eyes held a lot of emotion as they watched her bandage his hand. What the emotion was, she had no clue.
Dilan refocused, supposing he wasn't in too much pain and finished bandaging his hand before taking the other one and preforming the same process. Once she was done, she let go of him to pack up the equipment, failing to notice the twitch in Levi's hand as she let go of it before he brought both hands to his lap.
Dilan finished packing up and looked at her friend. She was convinced something happened. He was acting really weird.
"Levi." Dilan said softly and Levi looked up to her from where he had been staring at his bandaged hands. "If something was wrong, you would tell me, right?" She asked. Levi looked at her for a while and Dilan thought he was actually going to explain what happened for a second before Levi pulled his mask on again and put himself safely behind his walls.
"Yeah. But there's nothing wrong, so stop being a brat, hm?" Levi teased, flicking her on the forehead as he stood up and moved to boil the kettle. Dilan sighed but she wouldn't push. Maybe he would open up about it later.
"At least I know my limits in training. Think next time, hm?" She shot back, putting the first aid kit in the cupboard and earning herself a playful glare from her friend. Dilan yawned and stretched. "I'm going to have a shower. I suggest you have one too since you sink." She smirked as Levi scowled at her. "Then we can get back to work after." She added before Levi could retort. Levi didn't look happy about her comment but didn't mention it and nodded in agreement. Dilan was about to leave when Levi's voice rang out again.
"Oh, Hanji dropped by this morning." Levi said suddenly and Dilan turned around to face him.
"Yeah?" She raised an eyebrow. Hanji's visits were rarely short ones. She wondered how long she had been asleep for. Levi nodded, getting something out of his pocket.
"Asked me to give this to you, considering it was your birthday yesterday." Levi frowned and put the small package on the table, crossing his arms and looking to her expectedly. Dilan cursed silently, of course Hanji would find out of all people. Levi did not look happy.
"Fine, yes it was my birthday. It's no big deal, I don't really celebrate my birthday." She shrugged, picking up the box and biting back a smile. It was cute of Hanji to do this.
"Neither do I, but still." He glared. Dilan smirked playfully.
"I don't know your birthday either. For all I know, you could be the old man age of 24 right now." She pointed out. Levi frowned.
"I'm not." Levi replied and Dilan laughed.
"So..." She encouraged. Levi stared at her blankly. "When's your birthday?" Dilan sighed. Why does he have to make anything so difficult?
"I'll tell you..." Levi smirked. "The day after my birthday." He said simply before getting back to making his tea. Dilan balked at his back. That sly fucker...
"That was cold, Captain." She shook her head in disbelief, trying not to show her amusement in her voice. "Real cold." She added before walking off, practically feeling the smugness radiate off of her annoying friend. Asshole.
After Dilan showered, she walked to to back into her room and changed into some casual clothes. They were just roaming about the Inn today so there was no need to suit up in uniform. She simply wore a pair of black jeggings, white tank top and an oversized grey knitted roll neck jumper. Dilan chuckled as she remembered Tabitha had haggled to get the price down on this so furiously, the vender ended up crying. Her friend was such a beast.
Dilan sighed sadly, sitting down on the end of her bed and drying her hair with a towel. She dried to distract her thoughts from going to a bad place or she would end up wanting to cut.
Dilan shook her head firmly at the idea and brushed out her long black hair, gritting her teeth as the urge became stronger. Panicking slightly, she looked around for a distraction, sighing in relief as she saw the neat little blue box sitting on her desk and walked towards it, picking it up. Curious, she pulled the end of the ribbon that was tied into a bow and put the orange silk on the desk before opening the box. She blinked at the inside. It was some sort of machine.
Dilan took out the metal contraption, her eyebrows furrowed in interest. It was a silver metal square, upon which rested some sort of coil with dents in it, next to some sort of metal lines that made a sharp 'ping' noise as Dilan plucked it. Attached to the end of the coil was a crack that was just begging to be twisted. Dilan smiled.
Hanji you beautiful genius. What have you done now?
Dilan took a breath, fully ready for this machine to explode in her face but twisted the lever and blinking in surprise as it made a sound. The coil turned and one of the dents caught on the metal lines, creating a sharp 'ping'. Smiling unconsciously at the marvellous invention, Dilan started twirling again without hesitation this time, eyes widening as a tune started to be played.
Dilan stopped immediately, almost dropping the machine as her eyes teared up when she realised it was her mothers tune. The one Farlan used to hum to her when she was sad. What were the fucking odds? She hadn't heard this tune in three years. Not since her brother left her. It hurt too much to sing on her own.
Dilan took a deep breath and started twirling the machine with shaky hands, blinking out a tear as the melody started up again. Dilan could almost hear her mother singing along the words.
Des yuex qui front baisser les miens,
Un rire qui se perd sur sa bouche-
Violá le portrait sans retouche
De I'homme auquel j'appartiens.
Quand il me prend dans ses bras, Il me parle tout bas,
Je vois la vie en rose...
Dilan vaguely remembered Farlan telling her that the words of the song were a different language that their mother knew passed down from generation to generation back when there used to be different kinds of people. Dilan remembered some of the words and their translations that Farlan had taught her after she begged for a long time.
A knock on the open door brought her out of her musings and she turned to see a more fresh-looking Levi looking at her with slight concern in his eyes. Dilan quickly realised she was still crying and laughed a bit while she wiped her eyes.
"I'm fine. Great, actually." She reassured honestly before Levi could ask. Levi looked relieved for a second before confusion crossed his face.
"What is that thing? I heard music." Levi asked, coming further into the room to look at the machine. Dilan smiled, showing it to him.
"Hanji's gift. It plays music when you crank the lever. Listen." Dilan started it up again, smiling happily as her mother's tune rang out. She finally had it back after all these years. Levi smiled a bit, looking at her.
"I'm guessing this means something to you otherwise you wouldn't have that stupid smile on your face." Levi commented and Dilan gave him a half-assed glare but smiled anyway.
"My mother used to sing this song to me and my brother when she was still alive. My brother hummed it to me whenever I was upset. I didn't expect to ever hear it again but of course Hanji defies the impossible." She chuckled. Levi hummed in understanding.
"Yeah, I know the tune. La vie en rose, right?" He asked. Dilan blinked at him. Levi rolled his eyes at her astonishment. "A friend of mine used to hum it under his breath constantly. Fucking annoying." He explained and Dilan laughed. She supposed the song must be more common than she once thought. "Kind of nice to hear it again though. Shitty glasses did good." Levi smiled. Dilan nodded in agreement, walking over to her bedside table and putting the precious item down next to the clay apple Johnson had gifted her. She looked at it for a moment and smiled before taking a breath and walking back towards the door.
"Come on then. Enough emotional shit. Let's get to work." She raked a hand through her hair. Levi smirked and rolled his eyes but followed her anyway back downstairs.
Dilan got into the kitchen and blinked at the gun in the centre of the table. It was small, silver and had some sort of pattern running up the side. It was like silver vines. Dilan would have thought it was beautiful if she wasn't freaked out about the fact that there might be an intruder in the house.
"Levi, are you aware there is a gun on the kitchen table?" Dilan asked as Levi came into the room. He smirked and nodded, grabbing some files and sitting down.
"Yeah, it's yours." He said casually, starting to read. Dilan blinked at him before looking at the gun.
"Huh?" She said stupidly. Levi gave her an amused look and rolled his eyes.
"It's yours, idiot. You need a gun to learn how to shoot." He explained and Dilan's eyes widened in realisation.
"You're finally going to teach me!?" She asked excitedly, sitting down opposite him and picking up the silver weapon. Levi immediately took it off her.
"Oi, this is not a toy. If you're not careful your dumbass will end up putting a hole in the other shoulder." He said sternly. Dilan smirked, rolling her eyes.
"Okay Dad." She teased and Levi grimaced making her laugh. "This doesn't look like the other guns." She commented as he put it back down.
"Those are rifles, this is a handgun." He explained briefly. Dilan scrunched up her nose in confusion, not remembering seeing any handguns in the weapons station. She took a moment before realisation flashed on her face and she cracked a smile.
"Levi?" She asked and Levi's eyes flicked to hers. "Is this my birthday present?" She asked with a grin. Levi frowned, immediately confirming her suspicions. "Aw, that is so cute." She cooed and Levi looked close to punching her in the face.
"Call me cute again and I'll put a bullet in your skull, brat." He warned darkly. Dilan let out a puff of amusement knowing her friend was full of shit.
"I wasn't calling you cute, Levi. I was saying it was cute of you to get me a birthday present." She smiled widely and Levi looked away, frowning away a smile.
"Shut up. It's the same thing." He grumbled and Dilan chuckled at his embarrassment.
"Seriously, thank you." She said genuinely. She wasn't expecting a birthday present, but it still made her happy to be thought about. Levi's eyes softened as he looked back at her.
"You're welcome." He replied and Dilan smiled. Levi averted his eyes quickly and changed the topic. Dilan bit back a laugh at her emotionally constipated friend. "Moving on. Bozado or Monroe." Levi refocused, putting the gun to the side and opening out both files. Dilan groaned and dropped her head onto the table.
"This is going to take forever." She sighed dramatically. Levi flicked her on the forehead, and she pouted at the harsh sting. "Ouch." She mumbled. Levi ignored her.
"We only have until 4 o'clock before we need to be in Erwin's office and present him the final four. They'll be here, tonight, unpacking their stuff. We need to choose, and we need to do it quickly. We already slept until lunch time." Levi said logically and Dilan frowned, looking outside. It was indeed, late into the day.
"No wonder I'm hungry." She mused, grabbing an apple from the fruit bowl and sitting back down. Levi looked at her curiously for a second. "What?" She asked.
"Nothing... it's just... that's the first time I've seen you eat an apple in 6 months." Levi pointed out carefully. Dilan looked down at the delicious fruit and realised he was right.
"Yeah... I guess it is." She replied with a slight smile. She was healing. Slowly but it was happening. Levi smiled a bit too before he could stop himself, but he refocused quickly.
"Bozado or Monroe." He persisted. Dilan sighed and took a bite, taking extra-long to chew and swallow just to piss her friend off before looking back at his annoyed face.
"Not sure." She said simply and Levi clenched his jaw in irritancy. She decided she better chose before he kicks her in the face. "Okay, okay. I guess, in my opinion... Bozado is a more suitable asset to the team." She said finally. Levi raised an eyebrow.
"Elaborate." He encouraged. Dilan sighed.
"I guess... he knows the team on a personal level so there's no bad blood there. He's been outside the walls and I've seen him in action, so I know he won't crack under the pressure. Killed a fair few titans, via assists. He's fastest with the 3DMG and I think he'll be easy to train since you intimidate the hell out of him, and he'll want to do whatever you say to avoid stable duty." Dilan finished with a shrug, biting into her apple. Levi sighed, raking a hand through his hair.
"I get it but he's not talented enough for special ops. Other than his speed and the fact that he's been outside the walls before, he doesn't have much going for him. Monroe may be young, but she's got the talent that we're looking for. With proper training she could be an elite. I don't think Bozado will ever get there." Levi countered and Dilan understood his point.
"The girl is good... maybe she would be better suited. There's the chance I might be letting my feelings cloud my judgement. Kids are young. Stubborn. She'll want to prove herself worthy and it could be her downfall." Dilan sighed. Levi nodded and there was silence for a bit.
"She reminds you of Tabitha, doesn't she?" Levi asked and Dilan chuckled humourlessly, ignoring the sting in her chest.
"That obvious, huh?" She sighed. Levi gave her a look of understanding.
"She reminds me of her too. Honestly, I was leaning towards Bozado until I realised what I was doing. Professionally speaking, Monroe is the best fit. As second in command, do you agree?" Levi asked seriously. Dilan took a moment, thinking it over. The girl had talent. They could indeed make her an elite here.
"I agree. She's the best suited." Dilan said firmly. Levi nodded in approval and closed the files.
"Thank shit that's done." He sighed, throwing them on the pile. Dilan laughed and nodded. "Come on then, brat. Lesson time." Levi said simply, grabbing the gun and opening the door. Dilan sprung up and followed him out excitedly. She had been begging him to try out a real gun for the past week. She may be too excited for this. Am I a psychopath?
LEVI'S P.O.V.
After he had come back from his impromptu training session that left his hand all mangled, Levi had not anticipated how hard it would be to be around the brat with his freshly realised feelings. Every time he looked into those burning amber eyes, he felt his breath hitch in his throat, and it was fucking exhausting. When she was treating his wounds, being as gentle as she could, all Levi could think about was how he never wanted her to let go and then she did, and Levi had to restrain himself from reaching out again. God, he felt so fucking pathetic he wanted someone to whack some sense into him.
Luckily, he snapped out of it when Dilan asked if he would tell her if something was wrong. The question hit him deep and he almost told her the truth. Told her he loved her but managed to catch himself before he did. He was the fucking Captain of the survey corps. Besides, Dilan didn't see him like that. He was being pathetic, and he needed to just get over it.
Easier said than done but he managed to go back to acting relatively normal. In the end he didn't want to lose Dilan. If his new feelings told him anything it was that. Dilan was important to him; her friendship was important to him. He couldn't afford to lose her again so he would act normal. He would be normal. He would ignore how her laughs made his heart warm and one look in her eyes could make his brain go haywire for a second. They were friends. Nothing more. That's all they would ever be. Yes, it hurt but it was the way it is. He just had to get used to it.
"So!" Dilan's cheery voice snapped him out of his thoughts as they reached the target area of the training fields. "How do we do this?" She grinned, making a grab for the gun. Levi pulled it back, glaring at her.
"Did my 'this is not a toy' speech go in your head at all?" He deadpanned. Dilan laughed and rolled her eyes.
"Okay then, Captain. Teach me." She smirked. Levi took a step away from her, standing on his side, holding up the gun, clicking off safety. He closed one eye, lined up the shot and pulled the trigger as he breathed out. The bullet flew through the air, crackling like thunder before it shot straight through the centre of the target. Dilan's eyes widened. "Woah! That was so good. Who taught you to shoot?" She asked, impressed.
"Kenny." Levi sighed. Dilan offered an apologetic look, knowing she brought up a sore subject. Levi gave her a small but reassuring smile, passing her the gun.
"Okay so..." She frowned, not really knowing what to do with herself. Levi rolled his eyes but smiled anyway, moving her forward a bit by her shoulders.
"You want to stand side on, legs shoulder distance apart." Levi explained and Dilan did just that. "Extend your arms." He continued and Dilan held up the gun with both her hands. It would take a while before she would be able to shoot one handed like him. "Aim for the centre." He instructed and Dilan frowned in focus, sticking her tongue out a little in concentration as she tried to line up the cross with the centre.
"Like this?" She asked. Levi lent in from behind her to see if the lines matched up. They didn't.
"How can someone who managed to shoot an 3DMG into another 3DMG without stabbing them, get aiming so wrong." Levi commented. Dilan huffed with annoyance.
"Hey, aiming with knives and 3DMG is different to this. It feels like cheating." She replied.
"It is, kind of." He shrugged.
"Well help me then." Dilan asked, turning her head slightly to look at him. Levi looked into her fiery orbs and swallowed down his feelings, forcing a nod. She looked straight forward and Levi wrapped his arms around her from behind, getting closer so he could help her aim, moving her arms to the right position. He did his absolute best to ignore how close he was to her. How he literally couldn't be any closer and it was killing him. "Now?" She asked, seemingly unperturbed by the closeness, unlike Levi himself. Levi blinked to refocus and checked the aim, nodding as it lined up.
"Yep. Shoot." He instructed and Dilan pulled the trigger, leaning back into him a little at the unexpected pushback. Levi swallowed again.
"That was great!" She grinned and Levi took an overly large step away before looking at the target. It was two whole circles away from the centre. He turned back to the grinning brat to give her a deadpan look.
"That was pathetic. Again. I won't help you this time, either." He informed, not physically able to be that close to her again without doing something stupid. Dilan sighed.
"Fine." She furrowed her brows in determination and lined it up, shooting the gun again. 4 circles away from the centre. Dilan looked to him, chuckling nervously and scratching the back of her head.
"Guess we finally found something your shit at. Again." Levi ordered. Dilan scowled at the comment but prepared again. Levi had a feeling they were going to be here a while.
His feeling was indeed right. They were there until 3 o'clock. Dilan spent the first hour completely frustrated as she couldn't seem to get it. Levi was curious as to how she was so good at aiming with knives and shit at this. So, he told her to throw a knife at the target. She got centre on that first try. Throwing knives was much harder than guns so he wasn't sure why she was finding so much difficulty in it. Dilan looked like she was about to give up before Levi tried something new. He told her to imagine she was about to throw a knife. He told her to imagine the target was someone she hated.
"Erwin smith."
She had mumbled under her breath with a psychopathic grin and Levi had to forced down a laugh. What a freak. Still it was a pretty good pick.
Levi told her to picture it and waited until she was ready before telling her to shoot. The brat anticipated the knock-back this time and stood square as the bullet flew out and hit straight through the centre. Levi had smiled in approval whereas the brat yelled out in victory like the dramatic shit she is and ambushed him in a hug before he knew what was happening. Levi had tensed in surprise, hating how happy a simple friendly action made him. Thankfully Dilan had pulled back before Levi would have been forced to hug her in return and yelled out 'again' before refocusing. From there she only got better.
Levi moved her backwards further and further, making sure she hit the centre straight. She did every time. Levi had even got her running while aiming so she was able to hit a target while moving. Those took a few shots to perfect, but the brat pulled it off and Levi didn't doubt she would. Other than himself, she was one of the most talent people he had ever met. She defeated Kenny after all, something Levi thought was impossible. Dilan really was amazing.
God, I sound like a lovesick puppy. Fuck off.
After they finished with the handgun, Levi taught her the rifle. It was a large weapon and took her a moment to adjust but she had gotten the gist and it didn't take her long.
By the time they were done they realised the time and rushed to get changed into their uniform, grabbing the documents Levi had filled out and jumped on their horses, galloping to headquarters in a nick of time. Stabling their steeds, Levi and Dilan walked towards Erwin's office. Levi bit back a smirk of satisfaction as they walked past a group of cadets and they froze up. Dilan had laughed quietly, and Levi rolled his eyes. Cadets were hilarious.
"Hey Levi?" Dilan asked as they turned the corner, almost at Erwin's office. Levi nodded. "Was the gun yours?" Dilan asked curiously and Levi had to force his shoulders to remain untensed, knowing the brat would notice instantly.
"No, it was a friend's. I gave it to her as a gift but then she died." Levi explained, trying hard to keep his voice even. Dilan's eyes softened slightly.
"If it's your friends then surely you should keep it." Dilan replied kindly. Levi smiled a bit but shook his head.
"I have my own, I think it's time someone owned it again. She did always love that gun, fucking weirdo. Better someone looks after it then it stays in a corner collecting dust." Levi said honestly. If he trusted anyone enough to have Izzy's gun, it was Dilan. Dilan smiled and nodded in understanding as they reached Erwin's and Levi knocked.
"Come in." He called.
A/N: Damn! Levi caught feelings! Probably weren't expecting love this soon given this is a slow burn and the man is stubborn as fuck. But surprisingly, out of the two of them, Levi is better at this shit. While Levi's had little experience, Dilan has had none. And with Hanji shoving him in the right direction he couldn't deny it anymore and the floodgates have opened. He's suddenly experiencing everything he's been repressing for a long time. After 6 months without her his feelings have been amplified so he's way ahead of Dilan right now. When Levi does fall, as rare as that is, he falls hard and he falls fast.
Lovesick Levi has entered the building. About time Levi falls first in my opinion. It's normally the girl in most fanfics.
But if this Chapter has shown you anything else it's that Dilan is really not there yet. She's still dealing with a lot of bad trauma and is nowhere near psychological ready to even picture herself with a man, let alone start a relationship. Even if that relationship was with Levi. So honestly, it's a good thing he's keeping his feelings to himself for the moment. Dil ain't ready for that.
Next Chapter the special ops are welcomed into the building. Or told to get in and to shut up in a monotoned voice. This is Levi we are talking about. Not exactly the natural hostess.
Thanks for reading guys! Hope you're enjoying and remember to stay safe! X
