Austin woke up with a splitting headache. His eyelids felt like they were a hundred pounds each and someone had glued each one in place as he tried to open them. He could feel the light shining in through the windows as he sat up. His eyes flickered open and the room spun on its axis. His head pounded, as the sunlight blinded him. He hadn't been this hung over in a very long time, not since, not since the last time Kaylie had stomped on his heart. At least this time he'd found a bed. Last time he'd woken up on the couch in Sasha's trailer, not exactly made for his six foot plus frame. He slid his feet from beneath the covers and leaned his elbows on his knees. The room stopped spinning and he groaned.
What he wasn't prepared for was an answering groan from the other side of the bed. He turned quickly, which turned out to be a mistake since it caused his head to spin and the bile to rise in his throat. Instead of focusing on the other person in the room, he sprinted as fast as he could to the bathroom where he violently emptied the contents of his stomach.
He stood shakily, wiping at his mouth before moving to the sink. He tossed some cold water on his face and looked in the mirror. His eyes were bloodshot. He looked terrible, but not as bad as he felt.
He heard groaning and suddenly a brunette blur moved past him towards the toilet and began heaving. He turned and squinted. Kaylie. He kneeled next to her and held her hair back as she retched.
Finally, she sat back on the cold bathroom floor and let out a shuddering sigh. "The last thing I remember is…"
Austin nodded, "Passing out on me mid-kiss," he finished for her, his memories of the night before clear as a bell.
They're mouths had barely parted from the elevator all the way to the room. It had taken six attempts to simply get the keycard into the lock as neither wished to lose contact for more than a millisecond. His jacket, waistcoat, bow tie and shirt had made it to the carpeted floor, followed not long after by her silk dress, but then suddenly, kneeling in the center of the bed, she'd gone limp, literally.
He'd panicked for a moment, thinking she was unconscious, but then she'd curled up in a ball, hugging one of the pillows to her tightly. She was drunk, asleep and on her side. There wasn't much else he could do for her. So he'd done what any other guy would do, he took off his belt and his pants to get comfortable, gotten under the covers and gone to sleep.
Her sigh drew him back into the present and he realized she was still in just her bra and underwear. He supposed he ought to be a gentleman about this, after all they'd both been blitzed and not in their right minds. He stood quickly and moved to the closet, taking out one of the fluffy bathrobes the hotel provided.
Entering the bathroom again he saw she was washing her face, using some of the mouthwash provided on the counter top.
"Here you go," he said, putting the robe over her shoulders. She looked up, their eyes meeting in the bathroom mirror.
"Thanks," she said, pulling her arms through the sleeves and tying it snuggly around her waist. "Look Austin," she began, but he just shook his head, cutting her off.
"You don't have to say it, Kaylie. I get it."
She furrowed her brow, "What do you think you get exactly?"
"I get it. You're attracted to me, maybe you even like me a little, but obviously you don't want more than that and that's okay."
Her jaw dropped open. "Austin, that's not what I was going to say."
He ran a frustrated hand through his hair, "Then what is it? What keeps stopping you?"
She bit her lip. Crap, she's going to cry. "I don't know. I know I want to be with you. I know that, but it scares me so much. I'm afraid. I'm afraid that if I open myself up again I'm just going to get hurt."
He sighed, sitting down on the edge of the bathtub, "I'd never hurt you, Kaylie," he said softly. "Don't you know that?"
She pulled her arms around her middle, hugging them tightly to herself, "You say that and you mean it, but it doesn't make it true."
He broke off eye contact, studying the tiled floor intently, "I can't guarantee things would be perfect, that we'd never fight or that neither of us would get hurt. If that's what you want, I can't give that you to you." He looked back up at her, "No one can."
She nodded and he realized that this was it. This was the end; even after all those other times he thought it was over, they were finally finished. She wanted him, he wanted her, but she wasn't willing to take a risk. This was why she'd never recovered her form after returning to the sport, not because she wasn't capable, but because she simply wouldn't take a risk. He thought about saying that to her, wanting to hurt her for hurting him like this, but their eyes met and he found he couldn't do it. She was hurting too. She was hurting herself. He could see it in her eyes, the tension and the pain. He stood, moving towards her. He stood stock still for a moment before leaning down to brush a soft kiss across her forehead.
"Goodbye, Kaylie," he said softly and moved out of the bathroom.
He gathered his clothes quickly, tossing the shirt back over his head.
It was a walk of shame, an obvious one, but he didn't care. He'd call a cab from the lobby and go home. He was done.
Emily woke up and had the odd sensation that she wasn't where she was supposed to be. She sat up looking around and sighed. Her new bedroom, in the Tanner house, her house now, at least until January when she'd move to Los Angeles to start school, but this was where her mom and Brian would be for the foreseeable future. It was home now. She swung her legs out from under the covers and stood, her toes curling into the plushy carpet that lined the floor of her room.
She went down to the kitchen to make some breakfast when she ran into the Tanner's housekeeper and cook.
"Miss Emily, what would you like for breakfast?" Consuela asked, "We can have eggs or French toast."
Emily bit her lip. She hadn't thought about this, that there would be someone to wait on them hand and foot. She wasn't exactly sure how comfortable she'd be with that. Consuela seemed to sense her hesitancy.
"It is my job," she assured her.
Emily nodded and took a deep breath, "Egg white omelet with veggies?"
The cook nodded and smiled at her, "Si, coming right up."
She sat on a stool at the counter and waited feeling very useless, until she rolled her eyes at herself realizing that she could help. She got herself a glass of orange juice.
"Utensils?" she asked and Consuela pointed at one of the drawers with a smile. She found herself an apple in the refrigerator and then sat down just as her omelet was done. "Thank you," she said and smiled.
The cook stopped and looked at her for a moment before nodding in approval, "De nada."
Minutes later Lauren swept into the room and looked around, "Consuela, is my breakfast ready?" she asked, frowning.
"Coming right up, Miss Lauren, I just finished Miss Emily's breakfast," the cook said, nodding towards Emily's plate.
Lauren huffed and rolled her eyes before sitting down at the counter as well, drumming her fingers impatiently.
Maybe it was how delicious the omelet was, or waking up in her own room for the first time or believing that her mother was really happy, but Emily decided that she would try.
"Are you ready for this week?" Emily asked, taking another bite of her eggs.
Lauren looked at her, shocked that she'd been spoken to. "Uh, yeah, I guess. What do you mean?"
Emily rolled her eyes lightly and laughed. Obviously Lauren was still caught up in a post-wedding haze if she'd forgotten. "MJ, she's coming down to do her fluff pieces for the Olympic trials, remember? Prep work today, filming and interviews for the rest of the week."
Lauren nodded, biting her lip as if trying to hold something in, but then suddenly it burst out of her, "It's almost here, we're almost to the Olympics." She smiled at her and for the first time ever, Emily thought maybe it was genuine.
Kim knew she'd have to get to Payson's house early if she wanted to talk to her before practice, but as she stood at the door at five, ringing the doorbell repeatedly to no answer, she was beyond confused.
"Up and gone by half past four," a voice called out from the house next door. She turned and saw an older man, standing on the porch easing his way down the steps. "Don't know what we were thinking, buying a house with a stoop like this one," he muttered, obviously not requiring a response. He reached the first landing and sat down, before pulling a pipe out of his jacket's front inner pocket and set about lighting it.
She moved down towards the driveway that connected the two homes, "Gone by four thirty?" she asked.
"Every day, except Sundays," he said with a nod. "I'm up all hours, that's what they don't tell you about getting old, you except sick and slow, but no one ever tells you that you can't sleep. Anyway, you're Payson's mother aren't you? We've met before, when your daughter moved in."
Kim bit her lip, remembering the introduction, but not the man's name. He took pity on her, "Roy Hodgson," he said with a smile.
"Kim Keeler," she said and nodded. "Thanks for letting me know."
He nodded absently, "What are you doing here so early, if you don't mind me asking?"
Kim frowned, not sure if she did mind, but then, what was the harm? "There was something important I wanted to talk to Payson about and it just couldn't wait."
Roy pursed his lips after taking a drag from the pipe. He exhaled the smoke and looked back at her, "She's a good girl, your daughter. Sweet as pie," he added. "You can imagine when my Rose and I heard they were selling the place to a teenaged girl, well we had a moment of panic, but after meeting Payson, that girl just charmed the hell out of us."
Kim smiled, "I'm very proud of her," she said, not knowing what else to say.
"You should be proud of yourself too. She's so successful, with that gymnastics she does and all the traveling and the smarts too. You don't see young people like that much anymore. I had a mind to set her up with my grandson."
Kim's eyebrows raised, "Why didn't you?" she asked.
This man was Payson's neighbor, obviously retired and probably spent much of his time at home. He probably knew more about Payson's personal life than most people did.
He smirked at her and chuckled, "He's not good enough for her," he said with a shrug. "Besides that, the girl's heart was stolen a long time ago and I think you know that."
She frowned, not liking his tone, "No, I don't know that, Mr. Hodgson," she said.
He flicked a hand at her. "It's Roy," he corrected. "Well, if you don't know that, I guess she's got a good enough reason."
Kim took a step closer, "I'm her mother," she said, "what reason could she possibly have to keep something like that from me?"
Roy looked at her, his old eyes piercing into hers. "Is that why you came over here? To talk to her about him?" His words were vague, but she knew who he meant.
"I did," she said, her hands landing upon her hips as she pursed her lips in agitation.
"Your daughter looks just like that when she's fired up about something, you know that?" he observed and chuckled.
She furrowed her brow in confusion. "Last winter I was coming down these very stairs, don't even recall why now. Oh, that's right, I was going to clean the snow off our car so I could take Rose to the store. But she stood right where you're standing right now, told me in no uncertain terms to go back inside and that she was going to clean off the car or Rose could just give her the list and she'd do the shopping for her. Knew it was no use arguing right then and there." Roy laughed, before taking another draw from the pipe and Kim smiled. It sounded like something Payson would do. "Then she and that young man of hers shoveled our driveway, cleaned off the car and took the both of us shopping. She helped Rose make dinner that night too. It was nice having them over, very lively company. Listened to our stories and such."
Kim was stuck back on his words, "Her young man?" she asked and Roy rolled his eyes, a gesture she didn't really appreciate.
"Mrs. Keeler, your daughter is a rare kind of girl, did you really think no one would notice? He's a good boy and she's got him wrapped around her little finger, though she doesn't even know it. Take it from someone who knows, Mrs. Keeler, she's made a good choice and when she's ready to tell you, she will."
She looked at him archly, "If she's made such a good choice, why can't she tell me now?" she asked. Suddenly the rest of what he revealed seemed to permeate her mind. Shoveling snow, going to dinner, taking this old man and his wife shopping, it implied something. It implied a life together, one of the few things she hadn't considered when running through the worst and best case scenarios she'd created in her mind.
Roy shrugged, "I can't say for sure, but sometimes you just have to have a little faith. You raised a good girl, Mrs. Keeler and I think you know that. Like I said, when she's ready, she'll tell you."
She shook her head, "And if it was your daughter and she was with someone and hadn't told you about it?" she asked.
Roy smiled at her and shook his head, "You might have me there, Mrs. Keeler."
Kim nodded, but somehow didn't feel like she'd won the argument. He hadn't confirmed anything for her, though the more and more she thought about it, the surer she was about her suspicions. Payson and Sasha were what? Dating? No, that didn't seem like the right word. They were together. They'd kept it under the radar for obvious reasons. They'd kept it from her for reasons even more obvious.
Roy cleared his throat and she looked up, having forgotten he was there, "Before you do anything, Mrs. Keeler, just think about it. The wall between these two houses is pretty thin. He's not doing anything to hurt your daughter. In fact, the thing that probably hurt her the most is when he stayed away for so long."
"Stayed away?" she asked. "What? When?"
Roy looked pensive for a moment, scratching his chin thoughtfully. "Oh, it was probably almost a year ago now; she came back from, where was it?"
"Istanbul," Kim supplied for him, already knowing what he was going to say.
He pointed to her and nodded, "Istanbul," he said. "My wife and I watched her on the television, it was a sight to see. We've been keeping up with her career since she moved in. Anyway, she came back from Istanbul and suddenly we didn't see him around anymore and that girl of yours, Mrs. Keeler, she was different. Same sweetness, same seriousness, but not happy, that much I could tell. It near broke my heart to see her that sad. I had a mind to hunt that boy down and give him the lashing of his life."
Kim nodded, "Yes, I noticed that too. They were both like that," she said. She remembered how changed both of them were after Istanbul. At the time she hadn't put the puzzle pieces together, but now it all made sense. They'd fought in Istanbul, broken up, and that was the cause of the change she'd seen in them.
Roy shrugged, "Once he started coming around again, I'd say about six months later, it was like someone flipped a switch. You can't fake that kind of emotion, Mrs. Keeler. She's in love with that boy and he with her."
"Do you know what happened, why they split?" she asked.
Roy frowned, "Not sure as to the details of it, but from what I gathered, they were trying to protect each other. Just plain foolishness, and I told my wife that, but, well she said to me, 'Roy, we're all fools in love.' I suppose she's right, her and whatever scribbler she stole it from."
Kim made it to work around seven after picking Becca up. She saw MJ's car in the parking lot and she remembered that she and a crew would be around all week filming and interviewing the girls. She nodded towards her daughter's agent as she entered the Rock. MJ was on the far side working with a camera crew. Becca took off for the locker room to change. She saw Sasha working with Isabella on the beam, his focus laser like on the junior National Champion.
She made her way up to her office and was shocked to see Payson sitting at Sasha's desk waiting for her. She moved to her own desk and sat down as Payson stood up and took a deep breath.
"I taught Roy how to text. He said you stopped by this morning."
Kim looked up in shock. She hadn't been ready for this. She'd come to the gym willing to forget it entirely, to simply wait until Payson came to her, if she ever did. She met her daughter's eyes and for the first time in a long time saw a real vulnerability there.
"I did. He and I had a nice long talk."
Payson nodded and took a deep breath. "Yeah, he said that too. Do you have something you want to ask me?"
There it was. Payson was giving her an in, cracking open the door to her life that seemed shut for so long. Kim nodded and she saw her daughter brace herself. She looked at Payson, really looked at her. She was eighteen years old, intelligent, beautiful, virtually at the top of the world and Kim knew what happened in the next few moments could send her daughter's life crashing down around her ears. She wasn't going to let that happen.
"Are you happy, Pay?" she asked, though her words carried a lot more weight on them than that simple question.
Payson blinked at her, confused and then her eyes cleared, somehow understanding what her mother was asking. She closed her eyes for a moment and then opened them, smiling softly, "I am."
Kim had hundreds of questions on the tip of her tongue. Do you love him? Does he love you? Are you being safe? When were you going to tell me? What are your plans? Are you sure this is what you want? She held them in and looked at her daughter again. Their eyes met and a sense of understanding passed through their gaze. Payson moved forward first and Kim practically jumped out of her chair. They embraced tightly and the normally stoic Kim Keeler felt tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. She blinked furiously, holding them back.
Payson pulled away and stepped back, "After London, I'll tell you everything," she said and with another smile, she was gone, out of the office and down to the training floor.
She wasn't sure what she expected from this day. When she got into her car this morning to drive to Payson's, she never thought this was how it would go, but somehow she felt like this was the best possible result. She had so many unanswered questions still and then of course there was Mark. Her husband was not going to take this well, but for now, for right now, everything was okay.
