Kyou
Kara Maou
Title: Trust is a weakness
Chapter 3: Letting
Go
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own Kyou Kara Maou
TT
Summary: Trust is a weakness that should not be taken
advantage of because it hurts deeply when the one you love betrays
that trust. So far, the relationship between Yuuri and Wolfram has
been steady and Yuuri hasn't been denying their engagement as often.
However, during a party Wolfram sees something he shouldn't have. On
the verge of tears, Wolfram ponders suicide and sinks into a great
depression. As if that weren't enough, an upcoming war breaks out
between Shin Makoku and a neighboring human country. Can Yuuri save
Wolfram and Shin Makoku or will he be able to save one or the other?
Angst, dark chapters ahead.
A/N: Once again, I'm really sorry for the long wait. I got really sick the past week and was unable to update. Oh well, I'm updating now, so I hope you enjoy this chapter, although I'm sure many of you will hate me for it. ::Sighs:: Anyway, I was really satisfied with the reviews I received from chapter two. The most helpful review was the one I received from Nanettea. Your review was soooo helpful. Thank you so much for it. I appreciate it deeply. You are so right too. I was rushing through that chapter and I wanted to post it as soon as possible. But most of what you mentioned, I wanted to put in this chapter. And when it comes to writing their feeling's, I'm not that good when it comes to typing it up so that's why that chapie was filled with a lot of drama. Hopefully, it made most of the reader's know what I was trying to say. Also, I'm not that good when it comes to writing long chapter's even though I want to. But thank you so much for that review: ) I would also like to thank Kawaidumpling for telling me the correct spelling of 'mother' in Japanese. I had a feeling the way I spelled it was wrong and I was hoping someone would point it out. So, you really helped. I would also like to thank all you other reviewers/readers who supported e this long. And now, its' time for me to stop babbling and on to chapter 3!!! Enjoy!
Things written like this means it's a flashback, or memory or whatever you want to call it. . .
Wolfram's POV
Damn that Yuuri. He just had to come into my room last night and kiss me like that. Afterwards, I couldn't get much sleep and now I'm yawning like crazy. I just can't get my mind off of it. Why? That kiss was so enjoyable even though I hate him. When he pressed his lips against mine, they were so soft. Softer than I'd imagined. And when he moved his hands around me, he was surprisingly gentle even though he was mad. When I broke off the kiss, his hot breath sent shivers down my spine. It's unbelievable how he made me feel after all he put me through. It disgusts me. I can't stand it. I don't want to think about it, but I can't get it out of my head and I feel like kissing him again. No, I don't want to be with him after what he's done to me. I don't want to have feelings for him again. Last night is torturing me, playing over and over again. It's driving me insane.
"Wolfram, don't call me Heika. Call me Yuuri. I want to talk to you." "I already told you I won't talk to you about personal matters. And I'll call you what I want!" Wolfram yelled without realizing it. "Wolfram. What if it's an order from your king to speak to him no matter the topic?" Yuuri questioned angrily. "To hell with your orders! What if I said that? I don't care about the consequences. It can't be worse than what I've been through already." Wolfram looked away. "Wolfram, I can't believe you of all people would disobey me. I never order you guys around but if I happened to give you an order, I would never expect you to be the one to disobey. I thought you would listen but you can't even call me by my name or listen to what I have to say. What if it's something important. I'm really disappointed in you-" Wolfram cut him off. "Too bad. You were wrong about me then. I won't do something against my will. If your going to keep asking me to listen to your poor excuse for what you did to me that night, then prepare to be disappointed a lot more. Especially since you know I'm going to refuse. So don't order me! And if you want someone to listen to you, then why don't you ask Konrad. I'm sure he'd love to listen to anything you have to say, Heika."
It was then that Yuuri kissed me. Maybe I shouldn't have said those things. That's what made him kiss me. He kissed me because he didn't want to hear me talking about him and Konrad, even though it's the truth. But, he looked hurt. Well, that's too bad for him. The pain he's feeling couldn't possibly match up to the pain I've felt since I saw him and Konrad that night. And besides, he deserves it. They all deserve it.
I gave it much thought. When I told everyone I don't want to speak to Yuuri or Konrad about anything that includes personal matters between us. It would seem odd for us to only talk when it comes to business since this whole time we've been talking like friends and we got along like a family. We were all so close and it would be a shame to lose that. But than again, we never had anything between the three of us. It was only Konrad and Yuuri who had the good laughs and who spent the most time together and gave each other a lot of advice. They were the ones always talking and joking around with each other. Up till now, I thought I was a part of that. But I finally realized I wasn't and I wouldn't be accepted either. I wouldn't be losing any sort of relationship since it was never there to begin with. Although I would feel kind of lonely without them. I may not have been a big part of that friendship but I felt wanted for the first time.
Well, I guess it doesn't matter since I already I made my choice. The reason I made this decision is because I've been through this before. Sure, I'll be lonely from time to time, remembering everything we went through. But then I thought, this is the way it always was before Yuuri came into our lives. Everything and anything that was spoken between Konrad, the Maou and I was all business. There was never a relationship like this between us before. But then we had to have a Maou like Yuuri and show us differently. It didn't last long but going back to the way things used to be will be alright since it's the way we lived up until now. I'll get used to it again. It's okay to let things go back, right? It's okay to think this way, right? I mean, after all that's been going on, I shouldn't pretend like nothing's happened and be okay with it all. They deserve this, if nothing else. And this time, their pathetic apologies can't make up for it. I won't easily forgive them and I may not ever forgive them.
"Wolfram, stop calling me a wimp. I'm not a wimp!" Yuuri said seriously, yet playfully. "Come on Wolfram, why can't you think of me as your brother just once?" Konrad sighed. "Wolfram! What are you doing sleeping in my room in my bed!" Yelled a surprised and very embarrassed Yuuri. "Hey, Wolfram, you don't have anyone to go with to the party right? So. . . Let's go together. It'll be fun!" Yuuri asked hesitantly.
I
was really happy with them. The three of us were always together. And
it made me even happier when he asked me to the party. But then later
I found out he really wanted to be with Konrad instead. That hurt me
deeply. The pain was unbearable. Things could never be that way
between us again. That's what I've decided. So, then why am I crying?
Why do these tears continue to fall so painfully? Why can't I stop
remembering all the good times? I don't want to remember because it
hurts but I can't help it. When I think back, it hurts knowing we'll
never be that way again and I can't help but cry. I feel so weak,
still crying over this. But that only shows how hurt I was by their
actions.
"Wolfram!" I heard Konrad call my name. He came
running up to me and I quickly wiped away my tears. He told me that
Yuuri wanted to see the both of us right away. So, I got up and
sniffled before I said okay. "Are you alright, Wolfram?"
Konrad asked and seemed to be concerned. But I knew he wasn't. 'Stop
pretending already. Isn't it enough by now?' I yelled at him in my
head. "I'm fine. Let's go." I said harshly, hoping he
wouldn't notice that my voice was shaking and cracking. With that
done, he stopped asking me and just shook his head.
Normal POV
Wolfram and Konrad walked the rest of the way to Yuuri's office in silence. Wolfram was glad for that because he wasn't in the mood for dealing with him right now. When they got there, they saw Yuuri sitting at the desk with an angry expression on his face. Gunter, Anissina, Giesela, Gwendal, Murata, Greta and Yosak were all there too. Murata spoke first. "The reason why I had Yuuri summon you all here at this moment is because a neighboring human country has declared war on us. As we all know how Yuuri reacts to this, wanting to go speak with the king, it won't work this time around. The king refuses to speak on this matter and will attack Shin Makoku without hesitation. So, we will prepare the army for battle and accompanying them will be Gwendal and Gunter to help fight against them and Anissina-san to aid them. Giesela, Konrad and Wolfram along with other soldiers, will stay here at the castle in case Yuuri needs help. Besides, we can't have the Maou unprotected. That's basically it." "Why do I have to stay behind? Let me go with the army to the battle field." Wolfram got angry over this. "Because, Wolfram, it's too dangerous and I won't let you go. Besides, we need you here." Yuuri said simply. "Is it too dangerous or do you think I'm not strong enough?" Wolfram questioned angrily. Yuuri looked surprised. "Wolfram, it's too dangerous for you to go there and I refuse to risk the chance of letting you die. It's not that I underestimate your ability as a fighter, but I don't want to lose you. Just try to understand that." "Don't want to lose me? Don't give me that-" "It's an order. End of story." Yuuri cut him off and spoke seriously. It shocked everyone especially Wolfram. But, he knew he couldn't refuse this time so he gave up and left the room.
It was a bit passed noon when Yuuri came into Wolfram's room. "What do you want?" Wolfram asked. "I came to talk to you. And before you say anything, just listen to me. I won't talk to you about what happened if you don't want me to since I know you'll refuse anyway. So, instead, I wrote down the truth of what really happened that night. You can choose to read it if you want to or not, but just accept it from me." Yuuri handed Wolfram a small piece of paper rolled up and tied with a red ribbon. Wolfram took it and said, "You know I'll probably rip it up and throw it away without reading it." He knew how mean he sounded when he said that but it was too late to take it back. Yuuri didn't let those words bother him though. "I know. But there's also a chance you'll read it and hopefully you'll believe it. It's the truth anyway. And I rather give this to you so that there's a chance you'll find out instead of having me to keep trying to tell you, this is easier. Besides, I have a feeling you won't throw it away without reading it." Yuuri paused. Then quietly he asked, "Wolfram, can't you do me one last favor? I want you to promise me you won't die in this war. If you do, I won't forgive you." Yuuri got up and looked at Wolfram waiting for an answer. After a few moments of waiting, he saw he wasn't going to receive a response. Yuuri slowly closed the door behind him when he heard Wolfram speak. "Yuuri, I promise you, the last thing as a friend, that I won't die. So don't worry." Wolfram gave Yuuri one last smile and he smiled back before closing the door behind him.
Yuuri leaned against the door, bangs covering his eyes, he smiled a sad smile. "Thank you, Wolfram." He whispered quietly. Walking away he thought to himself, 'The reason why I want Wolfram to stay behind is because I want him to stay in my sight. I want to protect him. I don't want to lose him. I'm probably being selfish but I wish he could just understand this.'
It's
been about three weeks now since the war started. At this point, it
looked as if it was going no where. It was dragging on and it didn't
seem like anyone was winning. Many were injured during the battles
but that didn't stop them from fighting. A few of the opponent's men
secretly got passed Shin Makoku's army and went straight to the
castle to attack the Maou. When they got there, they broke into the
castle and started to wreck the place. They attacked the nurses and
maids. Konrad was the first to hear the noise and told Wolfram to go
to Yuuri and protect him no matter what. Konrad stayed behind to
fight them off. Wolfram was already one step ahead. When he got to
Yuuri, he should've known, hearing that Konrad was fighting the
soldiers alone, he wasn't going to sit by and watch.
As they were
about to go to Konrad, he showed up and told Yuuri to stay back
because these men were very dangerous. The soldiers came running
after Konrad and both Konrad and Wolfram fought to protect Yuuri from
them. Wolfram was pushed into the nearby room while Konrad was left
fighting in the hall. The men ended up cornering Wolfram into the
bathroom. One of them pulled out a gun and started shooting at
randomly. Wolfram dodged them all. One of the bullets he dodged hit
the knob and turned the faucet to the shower on and the tub started
filling up with water. Turning his attention to this was a big
mistake as the other guy thrust his dagger into Wolframs chest. When
he pulled it out, Wolfram fell to his knees and coughed up blood.
Wolfram cursed silently. How could he let his guard down so
carelessly? The guy with the dagger started lashing out repeatedly at
Wolfram. He managed to slash Wolfram and give him deep wounds, but
none he wasn't used to by now. The other guy drew his sword and aimed
right for Wolfram's shoulder just as he was about to make his attack.
"K' so." He swore out loud. "Come on and fight back. I
was expecting you to be more than this. Or is this all you got?"
One guy said and the other kicked him. Wolfram got up and managed to
attack one of the men but the other got Wolfram from behind.
The injured man got up off the floor while the other was struggling to keep hold of Wolfram. "I'm going to make you pay for wounding me." He said as he clenched his stomach and punched Wolfram in the face. Wolfram tried to move out of the way but couldn't and slipped on the blood on the floor and fell into the tub of water. It immediately turned red as Wolfram's blood spilled from his wounds. "Is this all you got? I kind of expected more from you." He said surprised. 'Why am I so weak against them? They're only human. I could beat them so quickly, so why..' Wolfram's thought's were cut off when he got stabbed in the other shoulder. He screamed as the pain spread throughout his entire body. He was beginning to feel the pain but couldn't understand why this was happening all of a sudden. He should be used to this by now, especially after he cut himself countless times. This should be nothing compared to that. Instead, it felt as if it were worse.
Wolfram's vision started to become dazed and he started to see two of the men standing in front of him. "Why aren't you fighting back, Sir Bielefield? Do you want to die that much? How about a last request before I kill you?" He questioned. At this point, Wolfram didn't mind dying. He's been thinking about suicide for a while now after all. The only thing about dying here, was that he didn't want to die by a humans hands. Besides that, he promised Yuuri he wouldn't die. But at this moment, he couldn't find the strength to fight back or even answer them. However, he managed a, "Go ahead and kill me, I dare you." With a smart guy attitude that really pissed them off. "Well, well, aren't we the brave one. If you want death that badly, I'll be glad to grant your wish." The guy lifted his sword and as he was about to bring it down with a heavy blow to kill Wolfram, he murmured his last words, "I guess I'm going to have to break that promise of ours, Yuuri. What a shame. I couldn't do you one last favor. I'm sorry, Please forgive me." Then, everything went black.
The other guy pulled out a match and threw it on the curtains setting the bathroom on fire. He immediately ran from the bathroom and out of the room only to find their comrades defeated by Konrad. "Dammit. Looks like I'll have to take care of him to, eh?" The guy stated. "What do you mean by that? What did you do to Wolfram? And where's the other guy that was with you?" Yuuri questioned nervously. "Don't worry, Heika. It's all taken care of." The guy smirked evilly. Konrad got angry and lashed out at the guy and they immediately engaged in battle. Yuuri noticed that the room Wolfram and the other opponent was on fire and immediately warned Konrad. Yuuri was about to run in after Wolfram when Konrad stopped him. "Yuuri, don't go in there it's too dangerous." Konrad warned. "But Wolfram's in there. I have to go help him." Yuuri protested. "And how are you going to help him if you get hurt in the process?" Konrad asked. Yuuri knew Konrad was right. But even so, he wanted to go and help Wolfram no matter what. "Wolfram! Are you okay? Get out of there Wolfram!" Yuuri started calling for him. The guy that Konrad knocked to the floor earlier, got up and said, "Don't even bother. We already took care of him. He can't answer you anymore." Then, he came from behind Yuuri and knocked him unconscious. "Yuuri!" Konrad screamed. The fight between them continued.
Yuuri
finally regained consciousness and sat up in bed. He saw Giesela and
Konrad sitting by the bedside. "How are you feeling, Heika?"
Giesela asked. "I'm fine. Thanks." Yuuri smiled. Slowly,
the occurrences from earlier came to mind. "Yuuri, you've been
unconscious for three hours. You should rest a bit more." Konrad
stated. "Aa." Yuuri paused. "What about Wolfram? Where
is he? Is he alright?" He questioned worriedly. Both Konrad and
Giesela fell silent and looked away sadly. "Why won't you guys
answer? He's okay right?" Yuuri realized the expression on their
face could mean only one thing. "No, it can't be." Yuuri
said barely above a whisper. He got out of bed and ran out of the
room and Konrad and Giesela went after him. They called after him to
try to stop him because they knew he was heading for the room that
Wolfram was in earlier and the sight would be to unbearable for Yuuri
to see. However, he did not stop running and when he got there, he
noticed the bathroom door was open. He ran up to the bathroom and the
sight he saw made him sick. He fell to his knees because he was too
weak to stand up.
The bathroom was a wreck. The walls were burnt
black and falling apart. Everything that had been there was burnt to
ash and all that was left was a few pieces of the towels and less
than half of the shower curtain remained. The bathroom lost it's
color since it was burnt and the only color that was on it was the
deep red color of spilled blood. Wolfram's blood. It was splattered
all over the bathroom walls and a puddle was by the toilet and on the
floor by the tub since the bloody water over flooded and spilled onto
it. Just for a moment, Yuuri could imagine Wolfram sitting on that
floor the way he did when they found him there attempting suicide
that time. The time they saw him with a dull, cold, emotionless look.
Only this time, he could hear Wolfram asking him, "Why didn't
you save me Yuuri?" But Wolfram wasn't there now. It was only
his imagination. The only sign that the blond had been there was a
few burnt remains of his clothes floating in the bloody water left in
the bathtub.
Yuuri
was now on his hands and knees screaming on the top of his lungs that
this was impossible, and how could Wolfram die this way, or why did
he die at all especially after he promised he wouldn't. He refused to
move from that spot. He just wanted to sit there for a while longer.
The sight drove him insane and he felt guilty for not being able to
save him. The reason he made Wolfram stay behind was to protect him
after all. Not only did that give him guilt, but the fact that
Wolfram died thinking he was cheating on him with Konrad, his own
brother, didn't help much. Wolfram died a sad death, never knowing
the truth. He may not be able to rest in peace. Konrad came to
Yuuri's side and put his arm around him. Yuuri rested his head on
Konrad's chest. "Yuuri, his death wasn't all bad. Look at it
this way. Wolfram died in battle. It was an honorable death, dying in
battle to protect his king and his friends and family. And for that
he will always be remembered, especially by us, right?" Konrad
was starting to cry. He could no longer hold back his tears either.
"That's true. . . But still." Yuuri said between chocked
sobs. "Just let me stay here. . . A little while longer."
Konrad understood and wiped his tears and left the room to give Yuuri
his time alone.
When Yuuri was done, he got up and walked out of
the bathroom. His vision wasn't clear, since his eyes were still
tear-filled and would be that way for a while. Before he closed the
door behind him, he let out a painful, heart-breaking sob he could no
longer hold back. "I guess I finally have to let go of you,
right, Wolfram? But now. . . You'll be free from everything. . . And
you won't continue to suffer. Are you happy now. . . Now that you no
longer have to be by my side? Because, I'm not happy. . ." His
voice slowly trailed off. Yuuri didn't want too, but now he had no
choice. He was slowly Letting Go.
A/N: Yes this chapter is finally done. To tell the truth, I was thinking about making this the last chapter and torture my readers. But, I've changed my mind and decided to be nice. I might put one or two more chapters to this story. If I put two, the next one is going to be extremely short. But if I add only one, I'm going to combine them together. However, I do believe this is my longest chapter yet. So I'm proud of that, although I don't like the ending since it seems kind of rushed. Either way, you'll all kill me for what I've done to Wolfram, right? I bet you hate me for what I've done. But, the whole reason I wrote this fanfic is because I was dying to write a story that turned out with Wolfram dying this way. Of course, that's not all that's happening. There's a lot more, so be prepared for the worst, mwahahaha! Anyway, review and tell me what you think. And please give me some more helpful advice and tips and even suggestions like you all did from chapter two. I appreciate it a lot! Thanks a bunch guys. Keep reading!
