In the days following the engineered miracle at Purifying Cave, Mew wandered the weathered halls and messy rooms of the Expedition Society. They had no particular destination in mind as they drifted through the building; rather, they were curious about how the building itself had changed. It still held that lived-in aesthetic, worn equipment and furniture that bore the marks of use, but Mew didn't see anything special about the place anymore. It was just a building where Pokemon worked. The jubilation Mew had felt when they had first joined the Expedition Society was gone, replaced by…nothing. No grins spread across their face, no excited laughter bubbled in their chest, and the urge to complete the Nexus was gone entirely.

Maybe it wasn't that the building had changed. Rather, maybe it was that Mew had.

Their illness had vanished immediately after Vallea had returned, confirming the doubts festering within them: Dark Matter had never been the one making them sick. It had been Vallea all along. Mew's fears from Purifying Cave only intensified once she returned, for they had been proven right: it was completely possible that nothing they had done after waking up in Mystery Jungle had been of their own volition. Behind every action they'd taken had been the influence of a completely different Pokemon, cajoling them to do the things she would want to do: follow Aster, join the Expedition Society, come to Serene Village. It had been like a little voice whispering in their ear, and now that the voice was gone, Mew didn't know what to do anymore. Their mind felt blank, open, empty.

They had spent weeks chasing a dream that wasn't even theirs.

Mew reached the Expedition Society's front door, opened it, and went out into the chilly grey morning. The sky was covered in a solid layer of dark clouds, and a thick fog shrouded Lively Town and faded the colorful houses as though an artist had painted over their blue and red roofs with a translucent grey. Cold mist clung to their fur, and from the plaza drifted scents of wet boards and metal boxes and bread still hot from the oven. Mew didn't go there, though. Instead, they followed the stone path across the grassy hill, down a set of rickety wooden stairs, and up to the old docks. Groups of Lapras swam around the small port, carrying cargo and Pokemon to and from all sorts of places across the ocean.

With nothing but the Liner Pass in their room, Mew could get a ride back to Capim Town and return to Mystery Jungle. To their home, or at least the closest thing they had to one. They just didn't know if that was what they really wanted. Was it worth leaving behind the friends they had? The life they'd made? And what would they do once they left? They didn't know.

On the end of the dock sat a familiar silhouette: round joints, pointy nose, and a long thin leaf growing from the top of the head. Nuzleaf, feet dangling over the water, stared out at the grey ocean waves that softly lapped at the dock's wooden pillars. Mew sat down next to him.

He gave them a slanted smile by way of greeting. "Afternoon, Mew. How're you feelin'?"

"Better, I think." Mew returned his smile with one of their own. "Looks like the sickness is gone for good. Are you excited that Vallea's back?"

"Hm. Excited is one word for it. I'm happy she came back, don't get me wrong, but I reckon I'm not exactly excited for her to start breaking my mailbox again!" he said with a wheezing laugh.

"I see."

It was quiet for a time, the only sounds being the gentle waves whispering beneath the old boards and the Lapras singing to each other somewhere deep within the fog, a baleful but harmonious sound. The same worries from before reared their heads and consumed Mew's thoughts once more, but they didn't get far before Nuzleaf cleared his throat. He said, "I think I recognize that look on your face—I've seen it on the kids in Serene Village often enough. What's bugging you?"

Mew shook their head. "It's nothing. Just some stupid doubts I've been having."

"What doubts?"

"I…" They trailed off and stared at the distant silhouettes of Pokemon swimming in the fog. They weren't sure how to describe what they were feeling. "The decisions I've made so far…I guess I'm not sure how much of them were me, and how much of them were Vallea. I kept seeing her memories and feeling what she felt, so how can I know what I did was my own choice? Like, maybe she somehow made me do things I otherwise wouldn't have. Do you know what I mean?"

Nuzleaf chuckled, shaking his head. They had all spent the last couple of days resting after the ordeal in Purifying Cave, but he still looked tired. "I know all too well what that's like. Feels like there's a little voice whisperin' in your ear, right? And you can't help but listen to it."

"Yeah, that's exactly what that's like!" Mew gave him a concerned look. "Did something like that happen to you?"

"Mmm…yep. I done went and met Dark Matter, and then I lost control of myself. It had a habit of possessing Pokemon it met, y'see. Preyed on all that negativity in our hearts, exploited it so that we would do what it wanted us to." He said it casually, but something dark lurked behind his eyes. "And I…I tried to end the world, even. Can you believe it? I nearly helped drag the planet into the sun. I reckon I oughta leave soon, or else I'll go and ruin things for y'all again."

"How will you ruin anything? You're not possessed anymore, are you?"

"Well, no." His pointy nose twitched as he stared into the grey waves. "But there's gotta be a reason Dark Matter decided to possess me. I've got my fair share of negativity, and I'm not exactly the nicest Pokemon around these parts. Having me around can't be a good thing for anyone."

Mew scoffed. "Nah, I don't think that's true. If you really were such a bad person, you wouldn't be this worried about it!"

They waited for a reply, but Nuzleaf had none to give. He just sat there wearing that tired smile, his hands resting in his lap like he wasn't sure what else to do with them. After a few seconds, Mew slid off the docks and floated above the water; it was boring just sitting there, and they needed to do something. Beneath the ocean's surface swam loads of different Water-type Pokemon; Mew amused themself for a time looking down and trying to identify their species. Lumineon, Feebas, Basculin. Some of them stared back up, eyes narrowed like they didn't know what to make of the stranger floating above them.

Eventually, Mew looked back up at Nuzleaf and asked, "The only reason you came here was to help bring Vallea back, right?"

"Yep."

"So now that your job is done, what will you do?"

"I'm not sure." He sniffed, rubbed his nose, and continued, "Maybe I'll ride one of these Lapras somewhere far away, to a place where nobody will find me. Or maybe I'll head back to Serene Village, check up on the old digs. I ditched the place a few months ago, y'see, and I left a few friends behind. Besides, we'll have to break the good news to Carracosta. I bet he'll be jumpin' with joy to see his little girl."

Mew had zoned out while he was talking, but his last sentence caught their attention. "Vallea's going to Serene Village?"

"Of course she is! It's her home after all, and she's rarin' to see her Pops again. Aster's goin' too. What about you?"

Mew furrowed their brow. The idea of going to Serene Village didn't have the same allure it'd had last time, when Aster had proposed the trip. "Probably not," they said. Then, "Actually, you've done a lot of travelling, right? Can I run an idea by you?"

"Shoot."

"I…" They took a second to think through the best way to say what they were trying to say. "I'm not sure coming to the Expedition Society was my idea to begin with. Now that Vallea's back, I sort of feel like the map-making and Pokemon-saving business isn't really for me. It seems a little repetitive, you know? You wake up, go somewhere, help someone, go to sleep, and repeat that process day after day."

"So what're you gonna do instead?" Nuzleaf asked, but he had a knowing glint in his eyes.

"I'm gonna leave." The declaration came a lot more easily than Mew had expected it to; maybe this was what they had wanted to do all along. "I'll head back to Mystery Jungle. It…it feels like that's what I want to do."

They expected Nuzleaf to refuse, to try and convince them to stay a while longer, to really think about whether or not this was a good idea. To his credit, he didn't do any of that. Instead, he only shrugged and said, "Okay. Are you gonna let the others know, or is this departure supposed to be a secret?"

"Oh. Right, I should probably tell them." Mew floated back to the docks, their gaze set on the Expedition Society headquarters standing tall and proud atop the grassy hill.

As they passed by, Nuzleaf outstretched his hand for them to shake. "Nice talking with you. Sorry again 'bout the whole kidnappin' business."

Mew shook it. "No worries. I hope your trip home goes okay."

"Ah, things have a habit of working out eventually." He smiled, and it didn't look quite so tired this time. "Good luck on your journey, kid."


The members of the Expedition Society took the news of Mew's departure in different ways: Bunnelby nodded silently and went back to the letter he was reading; Dedenne, her eyes glinting, forced a solar-powered Expedition Gadget onto them in case they should ever need to contact the Society; Archen and Buizel gave them a few tips on surviving in Mystery Dungeons; Swirlix insisted they share one last meal with the Society before leaving; Mawile and Jirachi gave them an all-purpose encyclopedia detailing every possible subject they could think of (this would become Mew's favorite book). Ampharos, wiping away a few tears, promised that if they ever needed to return for any reason, they would be welcomed with open arms. Privately, Mew doubted they would ever return to the Expedition Society, or even to Lively Town. The walls and roofs of the city now felt more like a trap than a home, and they were eager to go back to the open skies and fresh breeze of Mystery Jungle.

Swirlix was adamant about Mew having dinner with the Society one last time before leaving, so that left them with around half an hour before she was finished cooking, enough time for them to visit Vallea and Aster. The two hadn't once left their room (theirs now, not Mew's) in the days since arriving, and Mew hadn't been eager to disturb their reprieve; judging by what they'd heard about everything the two had endured, they thought the two deserved a break. The ritual combined with the weeks she had spent gone had sapped Vallea of her strength, leaving her near-comatose. The Riolu had fallen unconscious shortly after reuniting with Aster, and she'd spent the better part of the last few days asleep as her newly restored body recovered.

Mew told themself that they avoided their bedroom to give the two some space. However, somewhere deep in their heart, they knew that wasn't why they were staying away.

As Mew floated through the grey, silent meeting room and into the residential wing, a hushed conversation drifted out from Aster's and Vallea's bedroom. The door was slightly ajar, quiet murmurs slipping out every few seconds. The closer Mew got to the room, the more intelligible the words became.

"I'm fine, Aster. You don't need to worry so much," said an unfamiliar voice. No, it was Vallea. She sounded exhausted and gravelly, like she had a sore throat.

"Are you sure?" Aster said. There was a pause, and then he said, "A-alright, I'll drop it. I just…well, you know. This still feels unreal. I keep thinking this is all just a dream, and when I wake up you'll be gone again."

She chuckled weakly. "Funny you should say that. I was thinking the same thing. It really does feel like a dream, doesn't it?"

The conversation was private—too private. Mew knew they shouldn't be listening in, but they didn't want to interrupt the moment. Maybe they should find a place to wait, somewhere they wouldn't overhear anything that wasn't meant for them. On the other hand, Mew had left them alone for several days now. Who knew how much longer this conversation would carry on for? Maybe they would still be talking by the time Mew left for Mystery Jungle.

And they still needed to ask Vallea a question that lurked on the edge of their thoughts, that ate away at their mind and brought dread to their heart.

"We should go talk to him," Vallea said.

Aster scoffed. "Why? You know what he did. And even if I wanted to talk to him, we don't know where he is."

"That's a lie," she said with a chuckle. "We both know he's in Lively Town."

There was silence for a few seconds. Then, he said, "After everything Nuzleaf did, do you really think he can be trusted? Maybe he's lying about being controlled, and he's just waiting for the chance to attack again."

"I know he regrets what he's done," the Riolu said. "I can feel it. He hates himself. The last thing he needs is other people hating him too."

It was quiet for a long minute, the only noises being the ocean waves and gentle wind whispering through the wooden boards. Once Mew was completely sure the two were done talking, they gave the heavy door a good, loud knock. "Hey, it's Mew. Can I come in?" they said.

After a few seconds, Aster said, "Yeah, come in."

They opened the door and found Vallea sitting in one of the beds, hugging her knees to her chest. Aster sat beside her and rested his head on her shoulder. The Riolu looked terrible, all shadowed eyes and slumped shoulders, but she grinned brightly when she saw Mew. "I heard you were sick. How are you feeling?" she asked in a weak voice.

"I'm better now," they replied, and Aster sighed in relief. The Treecko stood up and stepped closer to Mew to examine their face. He looked so weird without his scarf, though that was probably because they'd never seen him not wearing it. His eyes narrowed as he pressed the back of his paw to their forehead, presumably measuring their temperature.

"No bouts of dizziness? No nausea? No headaches?" he asked.

"Nope."

He nodded approvingly at that. "Good."

"Yeah, um, actually, about that sickness…" Mew fidgeted in place, grabbing their tail with both paws and twisting it. "Vallea, can I ask you something personal?"

Vallea tilted her head, her aura tassels hanging limply. Her eyes went unfocused for a second; then she blinked and said, "Yeah, sure."

"What was it like when you were gone?"

The Riolu didn't respond at first. Her gaze drifted to the window; she looked even more tired (if that was possible) as she stared forlornly out at the monochrome sky. Aster sat down next to her and wrapped an arm around her in a weak gesture of comfort. Her ears twitched once, and she said, "It was…a lot like being asleep, actually. I didn't really know how much time was passing—days or months or years, it all felt the same to me. I can't remember most of it, just like how it's hard to remember what it's like when you're asleep."

She trailed off. Her partner was staring at her with a concerned expression. Mew floated a little closer, and said, "So that's it? It was like a really long nap, then?"

Vallea shook her head. "No, not exactly. Every so often, I'd see something like a dream. The places I saw were all hazy and blurry, but I still recognized some of them. Like the Expedition Society, or some of the Mystery Dungeons I've been to before." Turning to smile at Aster, she told him, "You were there a lot of the time. It was nice seeing you." But her smile quickly faded, replaced by a contemplative look. "Once, I even saw my home. I saw my Pops. He was…hurting. I wanted to go there so badly, but I couldn't reach him. It felt like I was trying to swim against the tides—it was impossible."

Vallea hugged her knees to her chest, her breathing unsteady. Aster embraced her, and she closed her eyes and leaned into him. Mew's heart dropped and their head spun—this time not from an illness, but from a horrid mixture of dread and vindication. Willingly or not, they'd had Vallea's soul trapped inside of them and subjected her to the worst kind of torture: seeing the people and places she loved, and preventing her from actually reaching them. No wonder they had been sick, no wonder they had seen her memories and felt what she felt: she had been trying to come back all along, and her efforts had reshaped their desires and warped their ambitions.

But however bad it felt for them, it likely felt just as horrible for her, if not worse.

"I'm sorry," Mew said. "I didn't mean to bring up any bad memories."

"It's not your fault. Nobody really knew this would happen when I disappeared," Vallea said. The Riolu's eyes went unfocused again as she looked at them; she sighed, gave her partner a smile, and pulled away from his hug. She stood up on shaky legs, took a moment to get her balance, and stepped towards Mew. Standing tall and steady, she placed her paws on their shoulders. "It's really not your fault, so you shouldn't feel so guilty. Your aura's all cold and slushy—it's making me feel bad too, you know that?"

Mew blinked at the statement. "What?"

From where he sat, Aster chuckled. "Long story short, she's an empath."

"Yep!" Vallea gave a crooked grin and placed her paws on her hips. "I can sense auras, which is a lot like feeling other Pokemon's emotions."

Mew stared blankly, their mouth slightly open. Their gaze moved between Vallea and Aster like a metronome, back and forth and back again. To Aster, they said, "You didn't tell me she could do that!"

Aster chuckled again. "I know, it surprised me too the first time I saw it." With a teasing lilt, he said, "So you'd better watch what you feel around her. She can see into your very soul."

Vallea stuck her tongue out at him. "I'm not that good at it! I just felt a little negativity coming from Mew, so I made an educated guess about what might be causing it!"

"Ah, and here I was getting ready to compliment your aura-sensing skills. But I guess I should save my praise if you're not all that good," he said, smirking.

"Whoa, hold on! I never said I didn't want any praise!" She pushed him playfully as he laughed. Within seconds she was laughing too as she shouted, "Ugh, you're horrible! You know that? Horrible!"

It was fascinating, Mew thought, how the presence of a single person could change someone so drastically. Aster had never teased them the way he did Vallea, and he had laughed only rarely in the time Mew had worked with him. But here he was, cackling as he tried to shield himself from Vallea's mock assault. When they thought about it, that wasn't really much of a surprise: Vallea seemed like the type of person who lit up the lives of everyone around her. It made Mew feel a bit better about what they were going to tell them.

They cleared their throat. "So I hear you two are going back to Serene Village?"

The two paused in the middle of their shoving match; the Riolu had her partner in a headlock and was giving him a noogie, but he immediately took the opportunity to slip out from her grip. She snickered, then looked up at Mew and said, "Yeah, that's right! Are you coming with?"

Mew sucked in a breath. "No. Actually, uh, I…I'm leaving for Mystery Jungle tonight."

"You're leaving?" Aster said, rubbing the back of his head. He looked disappointed. "Why?"

"I just…" They considered whether or not to share their reasoning with the two. After a moment's deliberation, they decided not to. There was no point in burdening them with Mew's worries; it wasn't like either of them could do anything to help. Mew shrugged, then said, "I just feel like it's time to head back home. My time at the Expedition Society was fun and all, but this life isn't for me. I think I'll leave the exploring to the explorers."

"Do the others know about this?" Vallea asked.

"Yeah, I told them already."

A frown crossed Aster's face as his gaze fell to the floor. He rubbed his nose—the same way Nuzleaf did—and said, "When are you leaving?"

"Tonight," Mew said. "Swirlix wants me to have one last dinner with the Society, so I'll leave after that."

Neither of them replied. The two turned to each other, an unspoken conversation written on their faces; the Riolu nodded, and the Treecko stood up with an air of resolution. "What do you think they'll need?" he asked her.

She threw her arms up incredulously. "How should I know? You're the one who always packs!"

"Good point."

Mew, uncomprehending, squinted at them. "Hang on, guys. What's going on?"

Aster strode to an old wooden chest that stood in the corner of the room, and threw it open and began rummaging within. From the depths of the chest, he said, "I'm packing you a kit of supplies you might need." The Treecko emerged clutching his old cloth satchel, a Lapras Liner Pass, several orbs and Oran Berries, a pouch of seeds, and a pair of wands. As he made his way to the desk and opened his money pouch, he continued, "We don't really have a spare bag to give you, so you'll have to make do with mine."

"Oh," Mew said, still processing what he had said. Then, "Wait, you don't need to do this! I-I can't accept your stuff! What if you'll need it in the future for one of your expeditions?"

"We're not the ones who'll be living in a Mystery Dungeon," Vallea said. "You probably know more about these kinds of things than we do, but there's no way we're just gonna let you waltz back into a place as dangerous as that, not without a few tools to keep you safe!"

While she spoke, Aster extracted a good handful of gold coins—far too many—from the pouch and placed them into a second, smaller pouch; he hefted it in his paws to feel its weight, then, apparently satisfied, dropped it into the satchel along with the rest of the supplies. "Here you are," he said, and tossed the satchel to Mew. They caught it—and nearly dropped to the floor from how heavy it was. Something about the unexpected generosity was getting to them, snaking its way into their heart and prying it open. Their eyes teared up and their face burned. To be faced with this bag—a reminder of the dream they'd never had—was too much to bear. They couldn't stop thinking about how excited they'd been when they had first joined the Expedition Society, and how fabricated that excitement really was.

"Guys, really, I—" Mew started, but Vallea cut them off.

"If you don't take it now, we'll just toss it onto whichever Lapras you end up riding!" she said. "Do you have an Expedition Gadget?"

"Uh…yeah," they whispered. Their lungs were caving in on themselves, and their arms felt weak. They dropped the bag on the floor. "Dedenne gave one to me, but—"

"Where is it?" she said.

"Um…I-I think it's on a shelf in the meeting room."

"You'd better not forget it," Aster said. "Dedenne gets real mad when she can't contact a Society member."

"But I'm not a member of your Society!" Mew shouted. All the doubts and fears and anxieties from the last few days suddenly reared their ugly heads and tore chunks out of Mew's insides. Shakily, they cried, "I-I don't even know why I came here in the first place! I don't know why I was so excited to join the Society! I don't know why I followed you, Aster! I-it felt like the right thing to do at the time, but now…" They wiped at their eyes and sniffled. "…Now I'm not sure if anything I did was really my own choice, or if…"

Vallea blinked once, her eyes unfocused, and said, "You're afraid I might've changed what you did." It wasn't an accusation or a complaint, more of an observation.

Mew nodded, staring down at the bag that didn't belong to them, their vision smeared by tears.

"Mew…" The Riolu approached them, and took both their paws in her own. She sucked in a long breath, and blew it out slowly as she met their eyes. "Maybe you're right. Maybe I really did influence your actions ever since you woke up in Mystery Jungle. And I'm sorry for that."

Mew gasped. "No, it wasn't your fault! You didn't mean for any of this to happen!"

"Still, though. It can't have been fun to live with two souls stuck inside you." With a conspiratorial glint in her eyes, she leaned closer and continued, "But now? Now you're the only one who gets to decide what you're gonna do. Isn't that exciting? Just think of the possibilities!"

Mew couldn't reply. Their throat had closed up and their voice had died completely. They just floated there helplessly in a building devoted to a dream that wasn't theirs. Eventually, they managed to force out, "But I still haven't figured out what I want to do. I only know what I don't want to do. There's still so much I don't know yet, and I still feel so lost…"

Aster approached and picked up the satchel. "I know how it feels. It seems like everyone's got it all figured out and you're still trying to catch up, right?"

Mew nodded.

"I'll let you in on a secret." He pointed out into the hallway. "Nobody in this building really knows what they're doing. At least, they don't know all the details. And that goes for everybody in this town too. The whole continent, really."

"That's right," Vallea said. "We're all trying to figure it out, same as you are. And sure, maybe some of us know more about…I don't know, about calculus or something."

"Dedenne knows a lot about how electric currents work," Aster supplied.

"Yeah, that too. But that doesn't mean they know exactly what they want to do with their lives. They might have general ideas or a plan, sure, but they figure a lot of the details out as they go," she said. "Like, I want to make a map of the world, but I have no idea how I'm gonna go about mapping out the Mist Continent! It's too freaking cold!"

Mew looked up. "But…you'll figure it out when you get there."

"Exactly!" The Riolu grinned ear to ear, her tail wagging wildly. "So yeah, maybe you don't know the details about what you're gonna do. But you've got a plan, right? You're gonna go back to Mystery Jungle! So try it out, see what happens! Go on your big journey of self-discovery! Maybe you'll find something you like, or even love! Worst case scenario, you can always come back here if you need a place to stay."

She gave Mew's paws a squeeze, then let go. Mew wiped their eyes again and sniffed loudly; their breath came a little easier, and their heart felt a little lighter. The Treecko held out the satchel for them to take. They accepted it this time, and put it on.

They squared their shoulders and said, "Thanks, guys. For everything."

"No problem-o!" Vallea said as Aster nodded. She was about to say something else, when suddenly a shout came from down the hall—it was Swirlix announcing dinner. All of a sudden Vallea's eyes widened as she gasped. "Oh, great! I'm starving! Come on, guys, let's move it!"

Without further ado, she grabbed ahold of Mew and Aster and hauled them out of the bedroom and down the hallway. Any traces of her earlier exhaustion were gone, replaced by a frankly incredible amount of energy. As Mew was pulled through the Expedition Society's halls, they thought again about how they had changed.

Vallea could keep her dream. Mew didn't need it. And as for what they wanted to do, well…

They would figure it out eventually.


Getting the Society together for dinner was, as Archen put it, "like herding a whole bunch of Skitty." Mawile had to be physically dragged out of her study, and Swirlix kept sneaking bites of the food when no one was looking. Ampharos somehow got lost on his way to the dining hall, forcing Dedenne to track him down; she eventually found him on the top floor of the lighthouse, staring in awe at the massive lamp. After the two arrived the entire Society was finally present, all chatting and laughing and sharing stories with each other.

Dinner passed in a blur of dishes, each more delectable than the last. Swirlix had broken out the whole pantry for this meal in an unprecedented fit of generosity: the whole table was covered in a diverse spread of various soups, salads, pies, and pastries—and she had only taken a single bite out of each of them. The centerpiece, an unusually large, misshapen, purple berry, was announced to be the result of her using her own sugary body as fertilizer for the berry bush. Once Mew heard that, they discreetly placed their portion onto Aster's plate. Aster, glaring at them, dumped the berry piece onto Archen's plate. Archen popped it into his beak with a smile, blissfully ignorant.

Mawile, who had spent the last few weeks corresponding with Celebi about Dark Matter, shared historical stories of ancient societies and their cultures and customs. Vallea listened with her eyes wide and mouth slightly open in awe, while Mew struggled to keep from dozing off. They were pleasantly full, and their eyelids drooped lower by the second. But before they fell asleep, Mawile's story was interrupted by Bunnelby falling asleep face-first into his vegetable stew and spilling it all over the table. The dining hall fell to pandemonium as Swirlix flew into a rage over the loss of perfectly edible food. In her anger she slammed the table and sent the plates and bowls flying, emptying their contents all across the room. She was positively inconsolable. The situation was deemed unsalvageable, and the rest of the Society tried to escape with their food (and for some, their lives).

In the midst of the chaos, Vallea and Aster grabbed Mew by their arms and made a break for the hallway. While they stepped around pools of soup and crushed remnants of the mystery berry, the Riolu somehow managed to snag a few Mago berry pastries; she shared them with Aster and Mew once they were outside the kitchen, a mischievous grin on her face.

"Remind me to never make Swirlix mad," Aster said as they made their way down the hallway. "She can be…scary."

Vallea chortled. "I dunno, I thought it was kinda funny to watch her yell. She reminds me of my old Pops when he gets really upset about something. It's hard to take her seriously, you know?"

"Eh, I guess? She's still frightening, though."

As the two talked, Mew only smiled and took small bites from their pastry. They knew the Society would be happy without them, so they didn't feel all that bad about leaving. Everyone here was like a really weird family, in a way. The three made a stop in their bedroom to pick up Aster's satchel—no, it was Mew's now—then they walked to the front door, pointedly ignoring the cacophony coming from the kitchen. As they stepped outside, Vallea shouted, "Mew's leaving, guys! If you wanna say goodbye, now's your chance!"

For a moment, the only response to her announcement was silence.

Then Bunnelby shouted, "Wait, they're leaving now?!"

Shortly after, the whole building rumbled and shook as several sets of footsteps smacked against the floor, the entire Society rushing to the front door. The Riolu chortled and followed her partner and Mew outside, leaving the door open behind her. The fog from earlier had vanished entirely, so now the scarlet sunset could be seen in all its glory. The horizon was a gradient that shifted from red to indigo as Mew tilted their head back to look up at the sky. Sharp white clouds stood out against the colorful heavens, a few pale stars twinkling in the darkness above them.

Not for the first time, Mew reflected on how weirdly wonderful it felt to step out from beneath the roof and breathe in the cool, fresh air. It was like being freed from a stale prison of bricks and floorboards. They hadn't felt this way before Purifying Cave. It wasn't hard to connect the dots.

So that was Mew's first discovery about themself: they loved being outdoors. Not a bad start, all things considered.

The Society hadn't caught up yet, so their stroll down Lively Town's streets to the docks was calm and quiet. The shops in the plaza were closing up for the day, vendors packing away their goods and heading home. (Just how did they manage to live beneath a roof? They couldn't see the stars or smell the ocean salt!) A few pedestrians ogled the three: some stared at Mew for being a mythical creature; others stared at Aster and Vallea for being the heroes who saved the world. None of the three took any notice, and they reached the docks in a matter of minutes without any trouble.

The docks were empty aside from a single Lapras waiting at the port; as they approached, she met Mew's eyes and said, "There you are! Nuzleaf told me you'd come eventually."

Mew tilted their head. "Nuzleaf said that?" they said at the same time Vallea said, "Where is he?"

"Nuzleaf's staying at an inn nearby," Lapras said. "He claims he already said goodbye once, and he probably couldn't handle saying it twice. He asked me specifically to wait for you, Mew. Said you'd need to take a trip to Capim Town, right?"

"Yeah," Mew said.

"Ready to head out?"

"Um… Not just yet."

"They need to say goodbye to a few people," Vallea explained.

As if on cue, the distant rumble of the Society's collective sprint became apparent, growing steadily louder over the course of the next few seconds. Someone, probably Dedenne, was shouting, "Waaaiiiiiit!"

Mew blinked, and suddenly the entire Society was tumbling down the hill toward the docks: Ampharos had tripped and was rolling on his side, taking out Dedenne, Buizel, and Swirlix with him; hairline cracks were growing on the dirt, probably Bunnelby burrowing beneath the surface; Archen was flapping his wings wildly in a vain attempt to avoid Ampharos' violent approach. And from the top of the hill, Mawile and Jirachi watched the whole mess with expressions of mixed amusement and disappointment. Mew cringed at the sight.

Ampharos, Archen, Buizel, and Swirlix came to a halt before the docks in a crumpled heap of bodies. Bunnelby popped up from beneath the earth, his fur disheveled and his ears jagged, and said, "I thought you weren't going to leave until tomorrow morning! You should've told us it's tonight!"

"I did!" Mew said with a laugh. "You were too busy reading your letter to listen, I guess."

Bunnelby groaned and rubbed his face in exasperation. Swirlix was the first to escape the ball of bodies; she bounced up, her cotton-like tendrils pointing every which way, and announced, "Sorry about dinner! You don't have to worry about clean-up, though—I'll take care of it."

Buizel, laying on his back, raised his paw to get her attention. "Not alone, you won't! I didn't even get one bite in before you wrecked the place!"

Swirlix puffed herself up and started to reply, but Mawile cut her off as she and Jirachi approached. "Don't worry about them, Mew. This is how they say goodbye. They just can't make themselves spell it out," she said with a small smile. "It's been a pleasure having you."

"Yeah, for sure!" Jirachi chimed in. "It was nice to have another mythical here, at least for a little while."

Archen extracted himself from beneath Ampharos (who was presently rubbing his head as he lay on his stomach) and pecked at his feathers to try and straighten them out. Once he was satisfied with his appearance, he said, "Feel free to come back anytime. Our doors are always open."

As he spoke, Dedenne finally rolled out as well and popped up, her whiskers sparking and crackling. She brandished a blue device as she strode towards Mew—it was the Expedition Gadget they had forgotten.

"Whoops," Mew said.

"Whoops, indeed!" Dedenne snapped. Her whiskers fizzed one last time as she tossed the Gadget at them. "Do you have any supplies? Wands, orbs, berries, that kind of thing?"

"Don't worry! They've got everything they need," Vallea said, raising her paws in a placating manner. "We made sure of it."

Ampharos finally managed to roll over and sit up. His eyes spun in his sockets, and Mawile had to rush over and help him up before he fell over again. It took several seconds, but he eventually managed to stand up on his own. Mawile moved to support him, but he waved her away. The orb on his tail glowed faintly, a golden light in the nightfall. "Mew, I'm sure everyone has told you this several times already, and you're probably sick of hearing it," he said, sniffling slightly, "but I really did enjoy the time you spent with us. Forgive me for lying to you. Wherever you go, whatever you do, I'm confident you'll do it with style and grace!" His voice broke on the last word, his eyes watering.

Even though they all seemed so incompetent sometimes, it had become clear to Mew that the Expedition Society was a group of exceptionally kind, brave, and caring Pokemon. No wonder Vallea had wanted to join them so badly. Mew was almost sorry they had chosen to leave them.

But only almost.

"Thanks, guys," they said, and put on their best, most shining smile. "Good luck with the world map."

"I'm sure we'll finish it eventually," Archen said. "At least, I hope we will."

Mew turned to face Vallea and Aster, who bore expressions of mixed regret and joy. Aster was staring down at the dock, while Vallea nodded and said, "I guess this is it, huh?"

"…Yeah," Mew said. Looking at her was almost like looking in a mirror, but one that was cracked and fractured. They still didn't really get what had happened with the reincarnation and multiple lives, but they knew that even though she bore some resemblance to them, the two were different Pokemon in the end. "Good luck with your dream, Vallea. I heard good things about you from your dad, so…you could say I have high expectations for you."

Vallea chortled. "Pops praising me? Never thought I'd see the day. I'll have to ask him about that when we go see him."

Aster sniffed once, then rushed forward and embraced Mew. "Take care of yourself," he whispered into their ear. He pulled back abruptly, rubbing the back of his neck. "If something happens, don't hesitate to call us. You've got your gadget, you know how to work it, so…yeah."

Vallea pounded her chest with one fist. "We'll be there."

"Thank you." Mew looked at the two for a moment, trying to memorize their faces, then turned to Lapras and pulled their Liner Pass out of their bag to show her. "I'm ready," they told her.

"Then climb aboard," she said. "Next stop: Capim Town."

Mew floated onto her shell and sat down on the edge, laying their satchel down beside them. With a little splash and a grunt, Lapras pushed off from the docks and began the voyage across the ocean.

As they floated away, Mew waved and shouted, "Goodbye, everyone! Thanks for everything!"

All ten members of the Expedition Society waved back, yelling their farewells to make themselves heard over the ocean waves crashing against the shorelines. Their voices overlapped and combined into a discordant chorus of love and hope. Mew kept waving until the Society was nothing more than a set of specks on the horizon, the Water Continent a faded blur in the distance.

The sun finally set, and Mew looked up at the stars. They closed their eyes and waited for an unfamiliar rush of emotions, for thoughts that they didn't think of, for memories that didn't belong to them.

But nothing came, and Mew knew their mind was finally their own.


Afterword

When I posted my first 900 word oneshot on AO3, way back in January of 2019, I wrote in the notes that writing did not come easily to me.

It still doesn't.

Metacognition has been trapped in my mind for the better part of two years. There was a point when I legitimately thought I would never finish. I gave up and walked away, leaving this story alone for months, until the ideas in my head overflowed and dragged me back to my keyboard. Metacognition has been through two laptops, two total rewrites, and four POV changes (some of these POVs grew into oneshots, while others still sit on my laptop). In short, it's been a bit of a ride.

But I still think creating this story was worth it. I don't regret a single word I've written, and I hope that this story can touch your heart the way other stories have touched mine.

Thank you for reading.