Either I did a good job or failed miserably with this chapter. At this point, I have overthought so much about my own writing that I no longer care.

Let them eat cake.


Lara had never felt so rundown in her entire life when she awoke. Between the catharsis of crying for the better part of an hour, her stomach trying to invert itself through her gullet, and the dehydration that always came paired with alcohol consumption, her energy reserves were completely depleted and she felt like a right mess. Her eyes stung, her nose was stuffed, and she felt like she'd been punched in the gut. Every breath was painful as her sore back and ab muscles screamed in protest of the stretching and the movement. Her head pounded and throbbed, sending stars dancing beneath her eyelids with every pulse. It was hard to fixate on anything but her own sorry state.

When she finally did shift her attention from internal to external, she became cognisant of the warmth of flesh coiled around her, as well as the shoulder upon which her head rested. Then, the smell of vanilla and amber tickled her nose. Keeping her eyes closed, she breathed deeply. She didn't want to ever leave the spot where she lay. A small squeeze from the arm wrapped around her told her Sam was still awake. Lara's ears tuned in to her environment at last and she could faintly hear that Sam was watching anime. With a groan, she buried her face into Sam's shoulder to shield her eyes from the light from the TV that managed to penetrate her eyelids.

"Sorry, did I wake you up?" Sam asked, pausing the show she was watching. Lara felt a numbing weight settle within her as she recollected the events of that evening. After she'd broken down at the Manor, she promptly excused herself from the property and wandered to a local liquor store. Getting that bottle of booze was about the only time she'd cashed in on her local celebrity status. Nobody questioned the fact that a Countess wanted to get drunk. Nobody questioned whether or not that Countess was eighteen, either.

After she'd exited the liquor store, she caught the next train back into Barking and wandered around the town for a while pissed off her ass. She didn't go anywhere in particular, her only destination was escape. After that, she barely remembered anything, only crying all over Sam and spewing her innards into the toilet.

"No," Lara murmured, letting her eyes flutter open and squinting against the light of the TV.

"How are you feeling?" Sam asked.

"Like absolute death," Lara groaned.

"That's to be expected," Sam said.

"Mmh…" Lara grunted. She contented herself with listening to Sam breathing, trying to match Sam's rhythm with her own. She was so very tired.

"You okay?" Sam asked, brushing some hair out of Lara's face. Lara didn't even have the energy to overthink, even if she did she could hardly think through the fog that clouded her mind. She merely closed her eyes and allowed herself to let her guard down and melt into Sam's touch.

"No," Lara replied automatically.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"Why are you still so kind to me after everything, Sam?" Lara asked, looking up at Sam.

"What do you mean?" Sam asked, returning Lara's gaze.

"What I mean is-" Lara winced at a particularly nasty throb her head gave, "I…know I've been difficult."

"You have been," Sam agreed with a nod, "but I've also been difficult in the past and you've been kind to me. Why wouldn't I match that energy? That's what good friends do." That's what good friends do. Were they even friends at that point, though? Lara's head felt like it was about to split from the pressure contained within.

"Sam?" Lara asked tentatively, her eyes streaming from the effort of brushing the pain of her headache aside. She squeezed them more tightly shut to will the pain away.

"Hm?" Sam responded.

"I could talk to you about anything, right?"

"What kind of a question is that?"

"Sam. Can you just reassure me? Please?" Lara opened her eyes back up to lock her gaze with Sam's once more, staring deep into those warm, brown orbs. Sam blinked slowly at her.

"Yeah," Sam replied quietly, "yeah, you can talk to me about anything." Lara chewed on her bottom lip.

"You swear?"

"Yes, Lara, I promise. What's up?"

"Sam…I think I might be gay…" There it was, the bombshell of the century. "...and I'm really confused and conflicted over it if I'm being honest. I've been thinking this for ages." Lara scanned Sam's face for a response. Sam blinked in surprise at the suddenness of her confession.

"Okay…what makes you think you're gay?"

"That's what confuses me. You see, Sam, I've never thought about anyone in a romantic context, not a single soul. But then this…" Lara paused to carefully select her next words, "...this individual came along and completely upended everything I knew about myself. But I don't even know if my feelings are romantic or platonic because I've never felt attracted to anyone else–not a girl, not a guy. And that really complicates matters for me. What if I'm wrong about liking women and I wind up making a huge mistake in pursuing my feelings for this individual? It could ruin everything." Lara couldn't stop her heart from racing, and wondered if Sam could feel her panic.

"Ruin everything?" Sam raised a brow at Lara, "Who is this 'individual?'"

"Sam-"

"Wait, can I guess?"

"Sam…"

"It's me, isn't it?" Sam asked. Lara froze. "It's okay, Lara, I already knew. I've known since New York."

"You…have?" Lara was completely numb with shock on the inside.

"Nothing gets past me, Lara. Nothing. Especially when it comes to my gaydar. Call it a survival instinct." Sam let out a small laugh. Lara couldn't understand how Sam was being so casual about everything. Her face must have betrayed this, because Sam frowned. "What's up?"

"How can you be so calm?"

"Because I've been where you're at. Why aren't you calm?"

"Because Sam, I want to talk this through. I don't know what I feel and it really distresses me and-"

"You wanna know the easiest way to figure things out?" Sam asked.

"What?" Lara countered. Sam gave her a mischievous grin.

"Kiss me, goofus," Sam said. All the heat in Lara's body rushed to her face, and her mind completely shut off. Being as depleted of energy as she was, she hadn't been able to process this type of scenario before letting it potentially unfold. She had no script planned for the present situation. It was like her brain was screaming: Error! Error! Error! She didn't even realize her jaw was hanging open until she came to for just long enough to give Sam a reaction.

"I- wot?! I can't do that!"

"Why not?" Sam asked, still wearing the same mischievous grin.

"What if we date and lose our friendship as a result?"

"It's just a kiss, Lara. If you like it, then you're gay and we can talk about what to do moving forward. If it's awful, cool! There's no stakes because we can just go back to being friends and close this chapter out."

"It's liking it that I'm afraid of!"

"Just kiss me, Lara," Sam repeated with a hint of impatience to her voice.

Lara opened her mouth to argue again, but before she could get a single word out, Sam rolled her eyes and snaked a hand around the back of her head and bridged the gap between their lips. Lara's initial instinct was to pull away from Sam, but the thought went as quickly as it came. The moment their lips touched, it felt natural, it felt right, like pieces of a puzzle carved from the wood of the same tree long ago. Sam's lips were soft, like silk, her skin like velvet when Lara reached up to put a hand to her cheek. Lara wanted to be garbed in those fabrics forever.

Their lips danced together in harmony, not missing a step. Lara couldn't help herself; she'd just whetted her appetite with a taste of Sam and now she was hungry for more. She ran her hand up through Sam's hair, pulling her more deeply into the kiss. Sam let out a small hum of approval. It dimly occurred to Lara in the back of her mind that she was making out with Sam, her best friend. Lara brushed the thought aside, allowing herself to be fully absorbed in the moment. Sam was the one who instigated what was happening to begin with, anyways.

Sam exhaled, her warm breath tickling the flesh on Lara's face and neck and leaving goosebumps in its wake. Lara closed her eyes, allowing herself to operate solely on sensation and desire. She put a hand on Sam's hip to pull her in closer. Sam snaked a leg between Lara's thighs. Lara quivered as fabric glided across fabric. Lara couldn't help but clench her thighs around Sam's as they continued to tango with their lips and their hips. She was at risk of losing herself in the moment. She felt that if they went at it much longer, they'd be in too deep to swim back up.

Lara resurfaced for air. Panting for breath, she and Sam locked eyes once more, resting their foreheads against each other. The heat radiating off of them was palpable. Lara felt herself grow red in the face for what felt like the umpteenth time that day over the vulnerability of the moment, as well as the proximity the two of them still shared.

"I'd say you're pretty gay," Sam concluded, "...and a great kisser." Lara swore she had to resemble a tomato by that point. Her mind took a turn for the worse when it fully registered what had just transpired between the two of them.

"What if that was a huge mistake?" Lara blurted out. Sam frowned.

"Why would it be?"

"I mean, what if this is the beginning of the end? I don't want to lose you, Sam."

"Real talk?"

"Please."

"I think you might be projecting a bit."

"Projecting?" Lara blinked reproachfully at Sam. "What do you mean?"

"Alright." Sam cleared her throat and sat up. "Lemme put it to you this way: hi! I'm Sam! I'm your best friend-"

"That's precisely the-"

"Let me finish," Sam interjected.

"Sorry."

"I'm Sam, your best friend. Let's check the facts here: despite some of the shit that happened around the beginning of the last semester before we really knew each other well, I'm still here, right?"

"...Yes," Lara agreed.

"So what would lead you to believe that part of me would suddenly change?"

Lara didn't have a response.

"Moreover," Sam continued, "you just had an incredibly triggering experience. You probably feel pretty abandoned considering you were just reminded so heavily of your parents and your situation. Don't you think that maybe, just maybe, that could be a factor in the way you are thinking about our situation right now?"

"You have a point…" Lara admitted.

"I know I do. I know so much psychology that I considered being a psych major at one point. Besides, my parents may be alive but they sure as shit aren't present, Lara. I've been in your place having this exact conversation with my ex–who I am still friends with, might I add. And yes, I get it, you saw that things are still a little weird between Jess and I right now but we will be friends again with time. I know this because she's not the only ex I'm still on good terms with. I'm not going to abandon you even if we do date. I'm safe, I promise."

"And what if I decide we shouldn't pursue this?" Lara asked. Sam threw her hands up in a dramatic shrug.

"Theeen we just watch One Piece, pretend the kiss never happened, and find contentment in our friendship. I'll admit, it was a really good kiss," Sam smirked, "but I'm also not going to put you in a position where you feel pressured to decide one way or the other. So why don't we just drop the topic for now?" Lara struggled to form a coherent response. She wasn't sure what she wanted to do, what she wanted to say. Sam, who could probably see this internal battle unfolding within her eyes, merely smiled at Lara before unpausing One Piece and returning her attention to that.

Lara tried to watch with her, but she couldn't. She couldn't forget the kiss. She couldn't forget the sparks that fired off when their lips touched, nor the silkiness of Sam's lips. The recent memories, coupled with Sam's tantalizing presence next to her, were all intoxicating. Lara didn't want to let the moment pass unacknowledged, but her tongue felt glued to the roof of her mouth.

After everything she'd been through the last few months, she couldn't even make a move on Sam? She'd stood up to the tyrants of the gymnastics team, disarmed a man swinging around a broken bottle in the Nine Bells, confronted her family trauma, but she couldn't muster up the courage to express how she truly felt to Sam? How much of a coward was she? Even though she thought it impossible, Lara felt more heat yet rush to her face, and she drew in a deep breath to steady herself.

"Hey Sam?" She said at length.

"Hm?" came Sam's reply as she kept her gaze glued to the TV. Lara sat up and put a hand to Sam's cheek, turning her head to face her own.

"I've made up my mind," Lara said as she bridged the gap between their lips once more.


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