Disclaimer:I would like to make an announcement to anyone who reads this. It's important, and concerns important issues. I'd like to say, "I do not own Gundam SEED/Destiny." Understood?

a/n: My sister gave my this... interesting idea. Enjoy your reading. It's good for you.


Kira and theEight Magic Words

"All hands, report to Level 1 battle stations!

As usual, ZAFT was interfering with the Archangel's plans. The constant thumping of footsteps was heard throughout the battleship, as people were resuming their positions for a skirmish.

Sending out its few soldiers, which consisted of Ensign Kira Yamato and Lieutenant Mu La Flaga, they prepared for an attack.

"Kira Yamato, let's do it!"

"Mu La Flaga, heading out!"

It was an intense fight between the Le Creuset Team and the Archangel. They were outnumbered, and the opponents being Coordinators didn't make it any easier. The battle had been going on continuously for several hours now, and neither side ceased to fight. It was a fairly even match. Just when Captain Murrue Ramius had devised an escape plan with Lieutenant Badgiruel, there was a request from one of their pilots.

"This is Kira Yamato, pilot of the Strike Gundam. I am requesting to retreat from the battlefield."

Back onboard the Archangel, Miriallia repeated his request.

"Captain, Kira Yamato wishes to retreat from the battlefield!"

Surprised by the sudden request, Murrue Ramius just sat there shocked.

Why would he chicken out now, of all times, she thought.

Quick to respond to the situation, Natarle Badgiruel replied, "No, request denied!"

Receiving the message from Miriallia, Kira continued to persist while fighting off the mobile suits, or rather, Gundams.

"Please, Lieutenant! I am requesting permission to return to the Archangel immediately! I will justify my reasons!"

"No, Ensign Yamato! I am denying your request! What reason could you possibly have that is valid!"

"It is valid, Lieutenant, I assure you! Now, please, let me retreat back to the Archangel! Why won't you let me?"

"Ensign Yamato, Capatin Ramius and I have both devised an escape plan, and it requires you to continue fighting to distract the Le Creuset Team! It is important that you follow our commands!"

"I understand, Lieutenant, but I have a reason!"

"For the last time, Ensign, request denied!"

Natarle Badgiruel was extremely annoyed right now. Kira Yamato had wasted their already restricted time, yet he still continued to talk. Murrue Ramius showed no reaction, still lost in her own thoughts.

By now, tears were beginning to well up in Kira's eyes. With a last cry of frustration, he slammed his fists onto the controls in his cockpit, screaming the following words with all his sincerity and heart.

"BUT I NEED TO GO TO THE TOILET!"

"…"

"…"

"…"

There was nothing but silence. Everyone had ceased fire, halted their actions, only hearing the eight words echoing continuously through their minds.

"BUT I NEED TO GO TO THE TOILET!"

Everyone, including the Le Creuset Team, burst out laughing, with the exception of Lieutenant Badgiruel, who was furious, although she couldn't hold back a smile. His 'reason' had been broadcast over all the spacecraft when he had slammed his fists onto the communication controls inside his cockpit.

Feeling embarrassed, Kira was slowly turning into a deep shade of red.

Still laughing hysterically, Murrue Ramius gave the ok for Natarle Badgiruel to grant his request.

"Alright, Ensign Yamato, you may retreat back to the Archangel to use the bathroom."

Landing back in the Archangel, Kira quickly hopped out of his Gundam and raced for the bathroom. The mechanics crew was laughing so hard they could barely stand up.

Seconds later, Kira ran back out of the bathroom, back to where his Gundam was stationed.

Surprised by how fast he was, Petty Officer Murdoch joked, "I know you're a Coordinator, kid, but I didn't know they could enhance your speed capabilities for using the bathroom!"

"Uh, well, actually… there was no toilet paper."

Silence was present once again, before the entire crew burst in to fits of laughter. Pointing to his right, Murdoch motioned for him to go. Running to said direction, Kira found there was another bathroom, and quickly relieved himself.

Running back to his Gundam once again, Murdoch gave him a wave and yelled, "Hey kid! Next time when we order supplies, I'll make sure to put in an extra order for toilet paper! Just for you!"

Turning back to his crew, he started talking about inventing a 'cockpit toilet', while laughing non-stop. Kira, with his Coordinator abilities, heard this, and turned bright pink.

As he was about to launch off in Strike again, there was a message from ZAFT.

"This is Captain Le Creuset of ZAFT. We are well aware that all military personnel are currently unable to stop laughing. This fight will cease for today. We thank you for your cooperation."

And with that, the skirmish ended.


a/n: How was it? There's more to come, some relating to this chapter, and some not. Reviews are appreciated. (If anybody would like to see Flay cleaning a toilet, you're more than welcome to come back when that chapter is up.)