A/N – I'm so sorry I know it's been a while I've had this chapter on my computer for ages, but I don't like it, so I'll probably replace, but anyway here it is. Most of you will need to reread the last chapter to know what is going on.

Melanie went out to talk to Jake.

Sorting out the past

"Hey, aren't you getting cold" said Melanie

"No, I've just been out here thinking," said Jake

"About what?" asked Melanie sitting down next to Jake.

"Everything"

"I'm sorry I exploded earlier. What happened with Clinton?"

"I told him he was one of my oldest friends, but that I couldn't believe that he could really leave his family"

"Alright, then what?"

"I told him he couldn't stay here and that he should go home"

"Did he?"

"No he said he was going to stay at Bobby Ray's"

"Oh right"

"How's Lirlyn?" asked Jake.

"Devastated. Petrified at the thought of being a single working mother of 5"

"Oh my god. How could he do that? I don't know how any man could abandon his kids like that and I can't even begin to imagine how Lirlyn must be feeling"

"I know, when I found out I was pregnant when Jamie and I were in New York, I was terrified at the thought that I might have to do it alone. Even though I knew that I wouldn't have been alone, I would have had my parents, Stella and even if we weren't together I knew I'd still have you around. But Lirlyn doesn't have any family left, she's only got us"

"Don't worry we'll be there for her and the kids. I just can't believe how he's turned out, he works all day, yells at Lirlyn if his dinner is not on the table when he gets home and then he goes to the bar every night and gets drunk. That could have been me"

"How do you work that one out?"

"Come on Lirlyn and Clinton were just like us, they got pregnant and married right out of high school. If you hadn't miscarried, that could have been us," said Jake miserably

"Yeah, if I'm honest I think it would have. But it's changed now, I no we won't let that happen"

"I know," said Jake then he paused, "Do you ever think about that baby?"

"Yeah I do, I'll never be okay about losing it, but at the time I felt relieved and even now I think it was for the best, I'm ashamed to admit that but it's true. They would have been 11 by now"

"I know I think about them all the time. At the time I thought that us having a baby would be an adventure and it did take a long time for me to realize that it would have been our only adventure. I still think that the baby was a blessing even losing it"

"What?" said Melanie emotionally not understanding at all.

"No, don't get me wrong, it'll never be okay. But if we hadn't gotten pregnant, we wouldn't have gotten married"

"Yeah and if I hadn't lost it, I wouldn't have left and made something of my life and let you grow up" said Melanie understanding now what he had meant.

"Exactly and because we got married you had to come back for a divorce and then we wouldn't have gotten back together and have Jamie"

"Yeah okay if you think about it that way, it does make it easier," said Melanie.

"It's still scary to think that if we had stayed together, you'd be a housewife, looking after a crappy house and 4 or 5 kids. I'd still be working at the tyre factory and getting drunk everynight"

"I know, I try and not think about that. We're nothing like that now, we're lucky our time apart made us grow up and realize how we really feel" said Melanie.

"I know. I can't imagine being without you or Jamie or not being around for the twins"

"I know, and I know you would never do that. And you should know that I would never take the kids from you no matter what happens" said Melanie as she hugged Jake.

"Oh" gasped Melanie, "The babies are kicking" she put Jake's hands on her stomach.

"Oh my god, I feel it" said Jake emotionally

"Right come on inside before you catch a cold. I don't want you worrying anymore, you're not Clinton and I'm not Lirlyn. We're gonna grow old together and we'll be the only couple still having sex in the nursing home everyday"

Jake just laughed and took Melanie's hand and went inside.