Part Six

2 Months Later USS Seahawk

January turned into February and February to March. Harm watched the sailors around him preparing to enter port. Every day since the Seahawk Jag had gotten sick and was transported to Germany and he'd been informed he was the Jag until they returned home; Harm had looked forward to this day. In his years in the Navy he'd experienced many returns from deployment but none had left him more excited and nervous then this one. Phone calls had been somewhat limited but he'd kept up with Mac's progress. Now it was just hours before he'd see her. It felt like forever since he'd left her in the ICU of Bethesda and he didn't plan on leaving her again anytime soon.

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Rehab Room Bethesda Naval Hospital

What did Dr. Chen call it? Her rehab would be like a Marathon. More like Badwater. Mac grumbled to herself.

"What's like Badwater?" Lucy her therapist asked.

Mac glanced at her startled. "Did I say that out loud?"

"Take a break for a second." Lucy wiped the sweat from Mac's eyes. "What's like Badwater? For that matter what's Badwater?"

"Ahh…" Mac glanced at Lucy again seeing her determined look. Knowing she had no choice she went with the less complicated of the two answers. "Badwater is a 135 mile ultramarthon." She glanced back towards hands mentally preparing herself to tackle this seemingly monumental task.

"Okay…" Lucy put her hand over Mac's quickly stopping Mac's attempt. "What is more LIKE Badwater then?"

Mac huffed. "Lieutenant I want to finish this so I can go rest. Now let go!"

Lucy just smiled at her. "First you answer my question. Then I let go so you can finish. THEN you can go back to your room."

Mac glanced past Lucy to the other patients in the room. Despite being injured in different ways and different places they were all struggling just the same. She closed her eyes not wanting to look at Lucy. "Fine. Dr. Chen in the ICU told me my recovery was like a marathon. It seems more like running Badwater than a marathon."

Lucy let go of her hand. "You're getting there Mac. You're making great progress. With the amount of effort you've put into your recovery you're doing great." Lucy reassured her but Mac wouldn't look at her.

"I want to go back to my room now. Can I go now?"

Lucy nodded at her. She'd been watching the shift in her favorite patient's attitude the last couple weeks. At first Mac had been quietly accepting everything they did and asked of her. But the more time went on and the more 'failures' as she knew Mac thought of them happened, the more closed off the Marine became. Seeing the defeated look on Mac's face Lucy let it drop for now. "Sure Ma'am. I'll take you back."

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Harm stuck his head into the room he'd been directed to. Seeing two young women he wondered if this really was the right room. One of them quickly brought their index finger to their mouth then motioned towards the area closest to the door. Harm noticed it was curtained off.

Quietly he slipped behind the curtain. Cards and flowers lined the wall making it a sea of color. His gaze shifted to the wheelchair next to the bed. His heart clenched even though he expected it. Pulling his eyes from the chair, he eagerly took in the sleeping form of his Marine. Even dressed in sweatpants and a Marines t-shirt she was a site for his sore eyes. His eyes drifted up past her arms resting on pillows to the scar at the hollow of her neck to her closed eyes. He took note of the shadows under her eyes. In her sleep she looked peaceful to him.

"I can feel your flyboy grin from here." Mac tiredly forced her eyes open to see his grin widened.
"I didn't wake you did I?" He quickly crossed the area to her side.

"I was just resting. Sit Harm." Harm watched her fumble with the bed controls. It took all his control not to jump in remembering the warnings of everyone from her therapy team to the Admiral, even though retired giving him a direct order, to let her ask for help before automatically doing difficult tasks for her.

With a frustrated sigh the bed started moving. She was mildly surprised Harm hadn't jumped in.

Harm pulled the chair closer. "This is new." He pointed to the hard neck brace around her neck. He didn't remember anyone mentioning that but then he'd been out of contact the last few days.

"Recent change." She supplied for him.

He watched her guarded look. It took him a little by surprise. Phone conversations with everyone during his stay on the Seahawk didn't prepare him for this. No one mentioned any indications of this.

"You're starring." He blushed, realizing that she was right.

"I'm sorry. You're just so beauti…"

"Harm don't!" She cut him off. Now he really was baffled.

"Is everything alright Mac?" Instantly he regretted it.

Anger flared in her eyes. "I'm a quadriplegic Harm. Nothing is all right." She ground out.

"Sarah." He tried.

"Just go!" She closed her eyes.

He starred at her in shock. "No!"

"I said get out Harm!"

"Sir I think you better leave." A voice broke through the curtain.

"Stow it Corporal." Mac ground out again.

"Yes Ma'am." The voice sounded hurt.

"I'm not leaving Mac. I just got here."

"Harm I want to be alone." She refused to look at him.

"Mac I just got back. I…"

"Please Harm. I just want to rest." She wouldn't look at him.

"Mac." With a weary sigh he stood up and kissed her forehead. "I'll be back later."

"No."

"What's going on here? I just got back and you don't want me here!" His anger rose. "Well Mac that's not going to happen! I'll be back tomorrow." He bolted from the room.

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Jen followed Harm into the house. He unceremoniously dropped his sea bag and cover in the corner. Mattie was still at school.

"How did the visit go today Sir?"

"Fine, Petty Officer." He really wasn't in the mood for more talk. She was giving him a knowing look. The same look she'd been giving him since he blew into the waiting room and practically ordered her to drive him home.

"Anything else, Petty Officer?"

"Yes, Sir. How did it really go?"

Of all their friends and family, it was Coates who'd spent the most time with Mac while he was on the Seahawk.

"When did she…" There was his hand running through his hair again. "When…"

"She's been making great progress. Gaining a little function all the time but the last few weeks it's stalled out." Jen took the bottled water he offered her and shrugged at him. "I think reality is setting in... Sir." She hastily added seeing the look on his face. "I should go pick up Mattie." Harm just nodded occupied with her words and the visit that went horrible wrong.

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The Next Day JAG HQ

Harm entered the bullpen for the first time in over three months. A few of the enlisted people stopped and glanced at Mac's office. He glanced over at her office noticing the lights on. Sturgis popped out of the office giving Harm an apologetic look before heading in the opposite direction. Dropping his briefcase and cover in his office, Harm headed to the General's office. Jen waved him in.

"Commander Rabb reporting as ordered."

The General didn't look up from the files he was reading. "How was your trip to the Seahawk?"

"Long, Sir." Harm just wanted to get in and out and start his leave.

"You've requested leave?"

"Ahh Yes Sir."

Cresswell gave him a hard look. "I can give you twelve days Commander."

"Twelve days! Sir I requested all my back leave too."

"I can authorize twelve days Commander. Take it or leave it."

Harm fought to remain at attention. "Aye, Aye, Sir."

"Dismissed."

Harm beat a hasty retreat through the bullpen and sunk wearily into his chair. Sometime later her realized Bud was standing in front of him.

"Sir are you okay?" Oddly he didn't realize how long he'd been starring at the pen in his hand. "I knocked but…"

"Have a seat Bud." Harm motioned to the chair in front of him.

"Is everything okay, Sir?"

Harm waved his arm aimlessly. "Cresswell didn't grant me as much leave as I requested."

"Ahh well the General has been on a high horse since…"

"Since Mac's accident?"

"Yes, Sir."

Harm contemplated that for a second. "I'm fine Bud. Just wrapping up here so I can go to the hospital."

Bud glanced at the clock. "She'll be in therapy for a few more hours. Then she takes a power nap. You should try this evening… uh Sir." Bud trailed off at the look Harm was giving him. "Are you okay to drive, Sir?"

"What?" Realizing he'd drifted in his own thoughts Harm gave him a tired smile. "I'm fine Lieutenant. I'll stop by to visit AJ soon."

"Yes, Sir."

"Dismissed."

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It was hours later when Harm finally made it to Bethesda. The last few months were catching up to him, he wasn't sure he could keep his head upright and prayed Mac didn't bite it off like his previous visit.

Squaring his shoulders he reached for the closed door.

"Oww." He muttered, rubbing his shin. One of the girls from yesterday backed way from him looking horrified.

"I…I…I'm sorry Sir."

"It's alright… ?"

"Corporal Juninski, Sir."

"It's okay Corporal." He motioned her away from the door.

"Is Mac asleep?"

"No Sir."

"It's Harm."

"So you're THE Commander Rabb!"

Harm laughed remembering Coates' description of the somewhat hyper Corporal. "And you're THE June."

She beamed. "Yes Sir." The look turned pensive. "Permission to speak freely, Sir."

"Only if you call me Harm." He nodded at her.

"It's none of my business but don't take yesterday personally. I mean we all have our bad days."

"She bit your head off too Corporal." Harm pointed out.

June just shrugged. "It's water under the bridge Sir. I've had my fair share of anger too. It's natural Sir. She's been waiting for you today and I need to pester the nurses." June motioned at a passing nurse who returned a mock horrified look.

Harm laughed. "I'll see you later Corporal." He was still laughing as he entered the room.

"What's so funny sailor?" She sounded and looked tired but she was smiling.

"Your roommate." He was mildly surprised she let him kiss her.

"Harm?" She now sounded pensive.

"It's okay Sarah. You don't need to apologize."

"I know… but I'm still sorry about yesterday."

He smiled at her. "You're forgiven." He pulled a small box from his jacket. "I found this in your jewelry box." He pulled out the engagement ring. "I thought you would have had Mattie bring it too you?"

"I can't exactly wear a ring right now Harm." She pointed out.

"Will this work?" He reached into his bag pulling out two teddy bears, one in a wedding dress, and the other in Navy Dress whites. There arms were entwined, there hands sown to a heart with the words Promise of Forever. He removed his wings and fastened them to the male bear.

Her eyes filled with tears. "Harm I don't know if yo…"

"Shh." He stopped her protest.

"I need you to hear me on this Sarah."

He looked her in the eye, holding her gaze. "Whether you spend the rest of your life in a wheelchair, or you walk beside me, I don't care. All I care is that you spend the rest of your life with me. The rest… we can figure out together. I love you. I've always loved you. And I will always love you."

Horrified at the tears that sprung to her eyes, he gently he lay down on the bed, pulling her against him.

"Shhh!" He soothed. His thumb drying the tear tracks.

"Harm." She choked out.

"Shhh, honey." He soothed. "We'll figure this out I promise."

Maybe it was because Harm never made promises he couldn't keep. Or maybe it was because she felt safe in his arms, for the first time since this horrible nightmare began; Mac let all her fears out.

TBC