Disclaimer: I don't own any of them. Not making any money of this. Love the idea of Ed and Roy. Please leave me a review if you like the story.


Chapter 14: The Snake And The Cross

Alphonse straightened up wearily, dusting his hands off as he eyed the structure he had just created. Finally satisfied with his handiwork, he nodded to the non-com standing behind him. "Lock up the prisoners, Sergeant." The man saluted the State Alchemist and moved off to the dispirited little group of POWs sitting on the ground a little distance away, and Al was turning in the opposite direction, heading back towards the main compound of military issue tents when a familiar silhouette caught his eye. A large, gnarled tree, completely denuded of its foliage and half-hidden from the camp by an outcropping of rock, was plainly visible from Al's vantage point, and reclining on a suitably sturdy branch about halfway up was a slight figure golden-haloed by the rising sun which was rapidly burning off the damp. Al regarded it bemusedly, then shrugged and trudged over. "Brother?"

One aureate eye opened reluctantly and peered down. "Hey, Al."

"What are you doing up there?"

"Thinking. And hiding from the others." As if to reinforce this position, a distinctive red coat had been rolled up and wadded into the crook of one of the neighbouring branches where it would be hidden from the casual observer. "The way everyone was carrying on after I took care of Pride, you would've thought I'd raised the dead or something really impressive. Oh, sorry. Bad choice of words."

"That's all right, brother. And you know, I think it's more your return from the dead that they're reacting to, not that it wasn't impressive when you disintegrated Pride. I think you even scared the rest of them off, at least for now."

"Good. Are we leaving now?" The voice was listless, and Al frowned.

"No, there are still isolated skirmishes going on, and even once those are settled, the border can't be left unguarded. But I'm sure we'll be returning to Central with the General soon. He's all right, by the way – the doctors have bandaged him up and he's already back in command." No reaction from the man above. Al cocked his head to one side thoughtfully, then, "Can I come up?"

A reluctant shrug. "Sure. Just be careful, a couple of the lower branches are rotted through." A hand extended down which Al took, even though he didn't really need the help. But sometimes people needed to give help, and the kindest thing to do in those cases was to accept it. He swung himself up agilely and scooted into a comfortable seat against the trunk of the tree, taking in the extended vistas offered by their elevated perch. From where he sat he could see the scarred and pitted earth that had been the frontline, and the humming hive of activity that was base camp. Runners darted to-and-fro briskly carrying messages between the tents, carefully avoiding the little groups of men sacked out in exhaustion in any free spot. The supply lines must have been re-established as well, as Al could see trucks trundling up and unloading supplies, and ambulances loaded with the wounded pulling away. His nose wrinkled as the wind changed ever so slightly and brought with it the oily feel and smell of burning flesh, and his eyes turned involuntarily towards the battlefield where soot-covered figures could be seen walking between the heaps of corpses with burning torches, cremating the dead swiftly to ensure that the filth of putrefaction did not endanger the living. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. He shivered involuntarily, and it wasn't just the cold.

"Wow, brother. You do know how to find the, um, most extensive views."

His companion grunted. "Always good to get an idea of the lay of the land, although battlefields aren't really my thing. The moors, maybe, or even rolling meadows. Al…" there was a guilty, hesitant pause, and then he plunged on resolutely, "you do realize…"

"…that you haven't actually regained your memories of being Ed? Of course I do," said Al gently. "But don't worry brother, I won't tell anyone until you and Colonel Hughes tell me to. And apart from the two of you and General Mustang, no one else even suspects."

Auric started in surprise and turned to face him, straddling the branch. "You know? Then why are you still calling me…?"

"Because you are," came the matter-of-fact answer. Al's clear gaze was fixed on his face, but there was no accusation in that pellucid regard, only a calm acceptance that simultaneously awed and humbled the target of his regard. "I finally realized it when you were fighting Pride to protect the General – and me. And yes," he held up his hand to forestall Auric's protestations that he was only acting a role, damn it, and he certainly couldn't care less about the General's safety, except that they had a contract, and…"I know Colonel Hughes asked you to take on the role of Edward Elric, Fullmetal Alchemist for less than altruistic reasons. But don't you see, Auric? The clothes may just be a costume, but deep inside you are Ed, in all the ways that matter. In the way you look out for me and those in need. In the way your presence gives people hope and strength. In the way you face things courageously head-on without thought as to the consequences for yourself." A flash of amusement lit his grey eyes. "So your language may be a little less colourful now…most of the time, anyway…but by just being…you're Ed, even if you go by another name."

The Gatekeeper looked troubled. "Al, who we are is defined by our memories. My memories as a Gatekeeper are what make me who I am here and now. Without Ed's memories and experiences, I can't truly be him, even though I may look the part…and I don't want to feel like I should be." He made a small sound of frustration. "I'm not…I just…I'm sick of feeling like I'm a disappointment because I can't be someone else. I. Am. Me. I'm not Ed."

Al rolled his eyes and privately thought that a vast capacity for denial was another one of those traits that would stick with his brother for all time. "Auric, you still don't understand. You don't have to be Ed, you are Ed." He shifted carefully in his seat, removing the tattered remains of his jacket and rolling up the sleeve of his shirt, the cloth still shockingly white except where rips in his jacket had let soot and grime in. "Remember this?"

"The snake and the cross from my dream," Auric said softly. "How could I forget?" He reached out tentatively and traced the angry red outline standing out against Al's sweat-streaked arm. Al smiled and nodded. A soft breeze ruffled through his short hair and blew through Auric's heavy golden bangs, bringing a welcome breath of cool air.

"See, not all of your memories were lost. Did you ever look its symbolism up in that book you were reading the other night? The one by Major Armstrong's ancestor?" Seeing the confusion in Auric's eyes, the young alchemist continued, "Look, wing'd serpents represent volatile or active substances; wingless serpents represent fixed or passive substances. A crucified serpent represents the fixation of the volatile," and he pointed to the mark on his arm. "Clear so far? Now, the Soul in alchemy is the passive presence in all of us that survives through all eternity and is therefore part of the original substance or First Matter of the Universe. Alchemists also know it as the One Thing of the Universe. The other component of who we are is Spirit, or the active presence in all of us that strives toward perfection. Spirit seeks material manifestation for expression – it is that part of our personalities shaped by our experiences. Ultimately, it is the One Mind of the Universe. Okay?"

Auric nodded warily. He had the feeling he was being led down the path to a truth he did not want to hear despite having long suspected it. And judging from the look in Al's eyes, he knew that Auric knew it too. And Auric knew that Al knew that Auric knew. Damn, no wriggling out of this one. "You see what I'm getting at, don't you? The unity of soul – the cross - and spirit – the wing'd serpent - in the body is the fixation of the volatile. Which you achieved for me at great cost to yourself, first by binding my soul to the armour to ensure it would not be lost, and then by retrieving my body and reuniting it with my soul. But even when I didn't have my body, I was still Al. You always told me that. And that would only be possible if who I am – who we are – as you put it, is determined deep down inside by our souls. The soul may be lost to this world through the Gate of Truth at death, but it cannot be destroyed, Auric. Your soul is Ed's, and there's an entire army out there who will swear that your body is too. I think that when the Gate of Truth put you into that other world, it took Ed's memories and started you over on a clean slate. And so lacking all your previous experiences to help define itself, your spirit manifested as Auric."

He paused to let his words sink in, then continued in that patient manner that made Alphonse Elric such a good teacher, "Ultimately though, each person's soul is immutable and unique, and that's why Homunculi don't – and can't – have souls. They are spirit manifest in body without soul, unstable, volatile, unfixed – and thus violate the laws of the Universe. Abominations, in other words. You, on the other hand, are who you always were – your spirit is just a little different, that's all. If you get your memories back eventually, it'll just be an evolution of who you are right now, and in the meantime, you can make new ones with us."

Auric looked mulishly at Al. He knew the alchemist was right, but there was a little ornery voice inside him that insisted on being obstreperous about it, and he suspected Al knew that, too, because he sighed resignedly, leaned over – and flicked Auric in the forehead. Hard. "Honestly, brother, you're just as stubborn as ever, and I've just about had it. You accuse us of being unable to let go and move past Ed, but you can't seem to let go of your hang-up about needing to be Auric: Gatekeeper. Which is fine, but You. Are. Ed. Too. Fate is, remember? You can but change how you deal with it." Auric gaped as Al quoted the Gatekeeper saying back to him. No, at him. Al's mouth quirked at the stunned expression on Auric's face. "Sorry to be disrespectful, brother, but if you don't stop whining, I'll hit you with a wrench. Winry's taught me well."

That earned him a surprised snort of laughter from Auric, and the tension seemed to slowly ebb from his posture as he capitulated and relaxed back in his seat. "Touché. Damn, you really do remember everything I tell you." Shrugging philosophically, "Well, if you're right, and I'm really Ed, then I can't believe you got married and I didn't get invited to the wedding. Who gave Winry away?"

Al blinked at Auric's mercurial mood swings, but decided to count his blessings. "General Mustang. He and Winry had a huge fight after you disappeared and that cleared the air between them. I think it was when she realized how much he genuinely cared about you and us that she finally forgave him for her parents. He took your loss really hard."

"Oh, you have no idea," mumbled Auric, putting a hand over his eyes.

Al's eyes narrowed. Was Auric…blushing? "What do you mean?"

Auric told him. Al's face went completely blank. "So you mean, that night before you…when you said you were going to go tell the Colonel what you were planning…you and he…and he never told me?"

"Technically, it was Ed," Auric pointed out helpfully. "But in terms of this body, then yes. I try not to think too hard about it."

Al swallowed hard. "Do you remember…?"

"No."

"Then are you absolutely certain it happened?"

"I doubt Maes would lie about something this important. And it explains Mustang's behaviour perfectly."

Silence. Then, almost hopefully, "I don't suppose the two of you might just have…cuddled?"

Auric struggled manfully to stifle the hysterical giggle in his throat. "No. Even if Mustang would have, I doubt Ed was the cuddling type. I'm certainly not."

Al sat there digesting this new information. "Right." He nodded decidedly and made to descend from their aerie. "If you'll excuse me, brother, I'm going to go kill him now."

Laughing openly now, Auric put an arm out to stop him. "Al - it was four years ago. And from what I've been told, Ed was a willing participant!"

"You were too young to know any better!" huffed Al indignantly. "I can't believe Mustang would take advantage of that to seduce you! And isn't he straight?"

"Bi, or so I've heard," the Gatekeeper said nonchalantly, examining his fingernails in an elaborate display of unconcern. "Basically, he'll go either way if the bait is attractive enough." He batted his eyelashes playfully at his best friend and brother…his brother…he had to admit he liked the sound of the word. "And who could resist these eyes?"

"Please. Too much information for this happily married family man," said Al, shuddering. "Oh, the images in my head…I'm going to have trouble looking him in the face the next time I see him. If I don't still decide to kill him, that is." A pause, then, "I can't believe he didn't tell me! Or you, for that matter!" and Al poked Auric in the ribs crossly. Auric held up his hands in surrender, a smirk still playing about his lips, and after another annoyed glare Al felt a grin of his own beginning to tug at the corners of his own. "So. What about you?"

"What about me?" asked Auric defensively. "I'm not married. No kids. Guild rule. Hey, shouldn't we be getting back to camp to report in?"

"Don't change the subject. Are you attracted to General Mustang?" Al's eyes widened. "Oh! Is that why he was so short with Captain Hawkeye after he found you comforting her the night of the party?"

Auric twitched. "Al…." Deciding that discretion was the better part of valour, he snatched up his coat as he slid off the branch and dropped to the ground gracefully. Al scrambled to follow, although the younger brother opted to take a route with a few more handholds along the way. By the time he reached terra firma, Auric was shaking out his coat vigorously and refusing to meet Al's eyes. He gave the seal embroidered on the back of the coat a long, thoughtful look before seeming to come to a decisive resolution as he shrugged the coat on, yanking on his braid as he freed it from his collar and settled the fabric of the coat more comfortably around his shoulders. Al watched, recognizing his brother's technique for avoiding uncomfortable subjects in every jerky motion. A grin split his face.

"You are!"

"Am not! He's a pain in the butt – and I meant that metaphorically, gutter-brain!" the Gatekeeper added hastily as Al clapped an hand to his mouth and turned purple with suppressed laughter. "Ed's right, he is a real bastard. He makes snide comments about my height, pushes me to do things I don't want to do, and what is with that annoying, insinuating smirk that seems permanently fused to his face?" Auric groaned. "I will concede in the short time I've known him, he's also been an ally. And I respect his mind and abilities, his courage and cunning, and the way he pushes everyone to the limits of their potential – and beyond. And…."

"And?" Al prompted.

"He's very handsome," admitted Auric reluctantly. "But he's also completely hung up on Ed, and seems to be carrying around an excessive amount of guilt over the matter. And I've never been one for issues and damaged goods. Too complicated."

Al coughed twice, something that sounded like "Pot…kettle…" and Auric shot him a suspicious look, which Al ignored. "Um. Yes. Well, relationships usually are complicated," Al mused aloud. "But I agree, he's never been able to let Ed go, probably because he never got to say goodbye the way I did. Not that I handled it particularly well, but at least I didn't have to go the last four years thinking of all the things I should have said." He hesitated, then said delicately, "I can't believe I'm saying this, but maybe if you helped him to see that and let him say goodbye symbolically, he could move on and this wouldn't be such an issue between the two of you."

"I'm not the one with the issues," muttered Auric. "But fine, if it'll make you happy." Al nodded decidedly, and Auric sighed. "Why does it seem like you're the one bossing me around? Are you certain I'm the older brother?"

"Oh, you're definitely older," smiled Alphonse serenely. "But I'm taller."

The outraged spluttering of the older Elric brother could be heard for miles around.