Author's Note : Thanks for all the reviews for the last chapter. You guys are awesome . And welcome to the new readers . Next update will be like two or three weeks from now because it's a blockbuster season and school holidays here , and I am working like crazy . As I am writing this , I am about to go to sleep and then I have to wake up in less than five hours later . Good mornight , guys !
You only tell me how you feel late at night
When you are in bed and your eyes are blurred with sleep
I think it's because you feel more hidden at night
You wrap the darkness around you like a blanket
You find comfort in the stars and quietness
. . .
Just be to sure to love me in the morning
It had been raining outside and Arizona felt nothing but a cold air hitting her bare thighs . She was only in her white top and black boy shorts .
Waking up abruptly in the middle of the night or … in this case , early in the morning because of bad dream was something that occurred regularly to the blonde . Glancing at the classic clock hanging on the wall , it was read four - twenty in the morning . Arizona was sitting on the black reclinable leather chair , her back fully rested against the soft cushion while her eyes were now staring at her sleeping girlfriend .
She had been awake for almost ten minutes , just staring at Callie in the dark . And going back to sleep seemed to be an impossible job for her now . Usually , she could only go back to sleep after letting off some steams by putting her gloves on , punching the bag in the personal gym room . But something about Callie's face was stopping her from leaving the room .
The truth was , she didn't want to leave Callie alone . Because all of this was too good to be true . They had finally connected physically and emotionally , making love to each other . Exploring her girlfriend's body while Callie marked Arizona's body . And one thing she learned , sex with Callie was refreshing . And it was far from the bad sex she thought could happened earlier tonight . The sex was natural , almost like they knew each other moves . Arizona was taking a full charge but Callie just knew when and how to seduced the blonde into giving in to her desire . Which resulted to multiple orgasms tonight .
Just looked at how disoriented the bedsheet was .
But oh how she wished for one day that she could wake up in the morning happily with Callie next to her , no nightmares , no more waking up in the middle of the night . Maybe it would take times but would the nightmare disappeared eventually ? Arizona had no answer to that . But there was always hope and life as she knew , had always been so unexpected .
Like meeting Callie and falling in .. love with Callie , Arizona gulped when the L word suddenly came up in her head , and sharing her bed with another person that wasn't Joanne - that were among the things that she thought as impossible to happened . But meeting Callie had changed her view . Callie taught her hopes and she kissed her with love .
Losing in her deep thoughts , eyes never leaving Callie , Arizona didn't realize that Callie had stirred from her previous sleeping position . In fact , Callie was awake , rubbing her eyes before she finally squinted her eyes toward Arizona's direction .
"Arizona ? Why are you sitting in the dark ?" Callie sat up while her hands were pulling the blanket to covered her naked body . It was freezing cold and Arizona just sat there alone while she comfortably hid under the blanket .
"Nothing , I was just turning off the AC . Go back to sleep , love ."
It was dark but Callie could see the small smile on Arizona's face . "Come to bed and warm me up ."
"Are you seducing me again ?" Arizona arched her eyebrows .
"No ! I just want to feel the heat of your body ." Callie glared at her .
Unable to resist the brunette's request , Arizona stood up and made her way to the bed . She quickly slid her body underneath the blanket , where Callie was already waiting .
Callie didn't wait long to wrapped her arm around the Arizona's body as she rested her head against the pale chest , her hand was rubbing around the muscular abs . "I love your abs ."
"I noticed that ." Arizona replied as she simply placed a gentle kisses on Callie's hair .
Callie looked up briefly and that was when she saw Arizona's face , she was clearly thinking about something . What exactly the thing that she possibly thinking about at this hour , thing that kept her away from the bed ? "You are thinking about something ."
Arizona let out a small laugh , Callie just knew her so well now . "I am thinking about how wonderful the feeling is when I let people in . When I let you in , to be specific ." Yeah , she was thinking about it right now .
"And your conclusion to it ?" Callie asked .
"It has no conclusion , Calliope . I couldn't conclude anything , what I have with you is still a journey , there's more to come , and I hope it will stays like that . Unless … we broke up ." There was a joke in her tone . "All I know about is , letting you in is the among smartest decisions I have ever made ." Arizona said while she traced her index finger on Callie's palm . Letting in , shutting out … She was good at keeping people out more than letting in .
"I just don't know why but I got a troubled vibe coming from you ." Callie said as she looked up . Brown eyes meeting blue eyes , Arizona knew that it was no use for her to kept the feeling bottled in . Callie's technique on digging out about something had been improving from good to greatly amazing .
"Letting you in ." Arizona stopped midway . "It got me thinking about how many people I already shutted out . Pushing them away …"
Her parents and her own brother , Nick , her former Chief , her best friend since in med school , her former colleagues , her students . She pushed them all . And while doing so , there were few of them that got hurt by her harsh words . One of that people was Richard Webber , a respectable Chief of Surgery at SGMW Hospital , her own mentor during her resident years . And he was almost like a father to Arizona . Father at the hospital …
But she hurted him with her words that day when she handed him her letter of resignation . All the harsh words … She didn't mean it , she was mad at that time , mad at the world and it all just slipped out from her mouth . The look on Richard's face was undescribable , he never thought that Arizona was capable of saying those words , hell , Arizona never thought that she would too . They never talked again after that . Arizona just avoided him as she was ashamed with those words she had uttered , words that she couldn't take it back .
"It's still not too late for you to make amends with them , Arizona ." Callie slowly said .
"I don't know how to let them in again after all the pain I've caused to them . All because I was in pain and in a misery . I dragged them down with me so that I didn't have to feel miserable alone . If I was miserable , they should be suffering too . I don't know what kind of fucked up human I was or .. I am , Calliope ." Arizona stared deeply at the ceiling , like she could see right through it . Doubt was still conquering her mind sometimes .
"You build houses for homeless families , you traveled to the other side of the world just to made a different for these families . You tried to make your parents happy even if that meant taking a very clumsy ..." Callie couldn't held back the laughter as she said the last two words . "… fake girlfriend for dinner with them . You were sad and full with anger but you didn't have to carry that feelings with you anymore , and guess what ? You aren't all those feelings anymore . You said you didn't know what kind of human you are . You are this kind of human , Arizona . The one that tried to make the world a better place for someone else that you forgot to appreciate yourself ." Callie spoke with a sincere voice .
Arizona's eyes locked with Callie's . Did she really deserved that much appreciation from the brunette ?
"I am so glad that you exist in this world . I adore you so much ." Callie slowly whispered as she leaned up , giving Arizona a soft kiss on the cheek .
"Calliope , I … love you ." Arizona whispered back . There , she finally said it . And she finally felt relief , like her windpipe was finally cleared after years of distress . But maybe it just wasn't loud enough . Not sure if Callie heard it or not , she just waited for a respond from the Latina .
"I love you too ." Callie answered back as she squeezed Arizona's cold hand . She buried a smile onto Arizona's chest , hugging her even tighter .
Turning to the left side of the bed , Arizona's hand was roaming around onto the empty space next to her . She slowly turned her eyes open only to find that Callie wasn't there . Moving to the other side of the bed , her eyes were hit by a sudden bright , causing Arizona to cringed a bit .
She had fallen asleep last night after the nightmare without any major trouble .. Wait not last night , early morning just now . Callie's voice talking to her was calming and her warm hugs gave her peace while her thumb tracing around Arizona's abdomen , soothing the blonde down . For once in , she managed to get back to sleep in less than half an hour after waking up from the recurring dreams about … Joanne and Aiden .
And it was now almost ten thirty in the morning . Where is Callie ? She could only smell the brunette's shampoo on the pillow next to her . Arizona slowly got up from her bed , feeling so well rested . She quickly moved to the other side of the nightstand , place where she put her cellphone last night .
Arizona smiled , her fingers dialled to the lobby . She had thinking about asking a permanent key card from the building management . She wanted to give the keycard to Callie so that she could get in and out without having any troubles in the future . The security in this building was tight and there was no way they would let Callie in easily in the future .
"Robbins , the penthouse . I'm calling to request an extra keycard for my penthouse ." Arizona nodded as she heard the answer from the woman on the other line . It would take three or four days for the keycard to be ready . Satisfied with the answer , Arizona hang up the phone .
Upon arriving at the kitchen , Arizona's sight was greet by Callie who was now dancing in her panties in the kitchen to the music played on her phone that was placed on the kitchen island . Callie was a natural mover , her hips was swaying to the left and right as she followed the rhythm , her arm flowed while the hand was washing the vegetables .
Arizona's mouth slowly curved , forming a smile as she silently took a seat at the kitchen island , watching Callie's dancing in amusement . She noticed that Callie was wearing the very thin white blouse , her favourite . It was her favourite because it was thin , of course . She could easily spotted the color of Callie's bra without undressing her . And oh , did Callie wear any now ? No . Arizona smiled grew even bigger .
Callie turned around with the chopping board and she was clearly startled by Arizona's presence . "Arizona ! God , you could at least say morning !"
"Well , good morning beautiful ." Arizona rested her chin on her hand , she had a goofy grin . Just a perfect view , luckily Callie wasn't sexually aroused now . If not , she surely could see the hardened nipples . Perhaps that could change ? Here in this kitchen ? Why not , Callie did seduce her in the bathroom last night after all ...
"What is it ?" Callie asked when she realized that Arizona hadn't take her eyes off of her .
"I'm currently plotting something .. to seduce you in the kitchen ." Arizona smirked . "I've never had a kitchen sex before . Just saying ."
Callie shook her head in disbelief as Arizona seemed not to be getting enough of the incredible sexs they had last night . And the blonde's obsession of thriving only for the best was clearly shown in the way she made Callie came , few times . Callie had an inaudible giggle inside of her head right now . She certainly did waking up a beast last night . Arizona was like a sleeping tiger .. or lion . And Callie disturbed the tiger . "We are not going to have a sex in the kitchen . Because it's almost eleven now and I'm hungry . You are hungry too ."
"I'm hungry for something else ." Arizona was grinning from ear to ear .
"You know , I discovered something in your fridge that I don't think I can unseen it ." Callie pretended not to hear Arizona's words . "There was a lime in your fridge and the lime had grew fur around of it . How old was the lime ? Three months ? Four ?"
"Six and plus . It was there before I went to Malawi ." Arizona replied nonchalantly .
"I think it might actually grow into a plant if there's sunlight in your fridge ! And a soil ." Callie glared at her girlfriend .
This was the typical conversation they were having together in the daylight . The thing that she had learned about the blonde , she was so unexpected . One minute , she was talking and making small conversations , like when the topping of the pizzas they were getting seemed not to be as 'full' as always and she would complain about it . Or , like right now .. Just simply arguing about a hideous lime stranded alone in the fridge without its NEW friends . And the next minute , Arizona could be talking about something important , opening up about herself , her past like last night before she fell back to sleep . And the 'I love you' ? She didn't expect that Arizona would say it last night . Took times for Arizona to finally said it but Callie felt it really worth the wait .
Last night … when the introvert Arizona opened up , it was something for Callie . And she felt happy that Arizona trusted her enough to talked about those feelings that she normally just kept it to herself . But sometimes , it was frustrating for her as Arizona never left the door opened for too long . She would close off again . Isolating her feelings away but it wasn't as bad as before . At least , Arizona wasn't angry to the world anymore like when they first met .
"Mhmm . So what was the fate of the lime in the end ?" Arizona had a small smile on her face while her eyes still glued on the brunette's curvy body .
"I threw it away already ." Callie simply replied , grabbing something from the fridge . "Miss Robbins , I may not be looking but I know that you are staring right now . Whatever dirty thoughts running inside of your head , nothing is still going to happen in this kitchen . I'm cooking ."
"You are just so .. beautiful that I couldn't stop staring ." Arizona's eyes never left Callie's . "And any dirty thoughts that I have on my mind , all will be executed before the end of this week . I'm not letting you out of here till Monday ."
"Oh .. You are kidnapping me ."
Arizona said nothing but she just gave Callie her signature stare .
Damn , the stare was deep and intense . One of many things that made Callie feel attracted to Arizona at the first place . Callie had to look away as she knew she could never win the staring competition against Arizona .
Arizona only took her eyes off Callie when she got up and opened the fridge , grabbing a bottle of water . As she drank the water , she moved toward the sink . Her face quickly changed , she was overwhelmed with all the bowls in the sink that were containing the extra flours Callie had used . Arizona always kept the sink empty , clean and sometimes she even wiped the sink to made sure it stayed dry as she liked to see a spotless sink . No deeper reason , it was just a habit . And she had a dishwasher for some reason . After all , she didn't use the sink in the kitchen often as she rarely cook at home . She didn't know how to cook , to be honest .
And automatically , Arizona's hands turned into her cleaning mode as she started to rinse all the bowls . After that she quickly pulled the door of the dishwasher .
"Oh , Arizona . Just left the bowls out . I might want to use it again ." Callie actually noticed what Arizona had been doing . Her girlfriend is totally a neat freak !
"All of it ?" Arizona couldn't help but rubbed her head a few times .
"Miss Neat Freak , I will clean your kitchen after using it , after I finish making lunch for both of us . Can you please , just stop worrying for a second ? Just sit down ." Callie laughed . "I will clean everything up , I promise ."
"I just wanted to help ." Arizona managed to cover up .
"Here , if you really wanted to help ." Callie threw one of the green pepper toward Arizona's direction which she quickly caught it with her right hand . "While doing that , I'm going to move on with the chicken . Be quick because you have an onion to chop after that ."
"Wow . Giving orders just like a pro chef ." Arizona mumbled , blinking a few times as she moved toward the chopping board . Serves you right , Arizona . You really wanted to help , right ? Now , how do I chop it ?
"Here , let me show you ." Aware of Arizona having a hard time to chopped the vegetables , Callie took over the knife as she started to cut the pepper first , with gracefulness . "Now you try ."
Arizona began cutting the pepper , basically copying what Callie just did . But as she cut it , Callie noticed just how bad Arizona's hands and shoulders went stiff . Callie covered her mouth with her hand , she was clearly holding back the laughter that had started to slip out from her mouth . When Arizona was about to turned around , Callie quickly turned away , facing the stove . No , I cannot laugh ! At least Arizona is trying to help me . Callie suppressed a laugh .
"I want you to clear your schedule for next weekend ." Arizona spoke while her eyes still focused on the chopping board , suddenly changing the direction of their conversation .
Maybe Arizona should just stopped with the commanding tone whenever she had plans for them both , maybe she should asked first instead of telling . Maybe just maybe but it she was used to it . But there should be no problem if Callie is okay with it , right ?
"What ? Why ?" Callie asked , raising her eyebrows to herself .
"It's your birthday next week ." Of course Arizona didn't forget the day of this amazing woman was born .
"And ?"
"I'm taking you to The Hamptons ."
"The Hamptons as in New York's The Hamptons ?" Callie asked just to double confirmed it .
"Mhmmm ."
"I didn't know that you owned a house there ."
"I didn't remember saying that I have a house over there , did I ?" Arizona looked up as she just finished with the peppers number two . There was still another one . "There's a great French restaurant over there that I've been meaning to try ."
"You want to fly all the way to New York just because of this French restaurant ?" Callie's eyes opened even wider .
Hell no . Arizona actually had some other plan for Callie's birthday . But it was a surprise , so she couldn't tell Callie more about it . "To celebrate your birthday at this restaurant , yes . You .. don't .. want to go ?"
"We just went to that romantic restaurant on the dock last night . I'm just not sure that I want you to pamper me with nights of dinner at fancy restaurants on weekly basis ." Callie stopped and sighed . "I mean … We are more than this .. so much more . And I don't want to appeared to be as a materialistic person who only cares about money , especially to those people who are important to you , I don't want them to know me like that ."
"We are more than this . So much more than this ." Putting down the knife , Arizona turned around as she walked forward to Callie's direction . "I don't care what people think of you . But I know who you are and you know who I am . That's the only thing that matters . Besides , I have some works to do there ."
Feeling the warmth of Arizona's breath hitting the back of her neck , Callie froze in her position . She knew Arizona was standing behind her , so close .
"I have waited for this moment for too long . I wanted to bring someone to the restaurant on the dock , I did make it happened last night . I have always wanted to fly to somewhere for just a simple reason with someone that I know I could trust with my life , I will make that happens too , Calliope . I never got a chance before but now I have found that someone , I want to make it happens . I don't want to hold anything back . I just want to live my life . With you , every single day and forever ." Placing a few kisses on brunette's neck , Arizona hugged her girlfriend from behind . "Hell ! If I could , I want to bring you to work . Everyday ! Everywhere I go !"
"Ok…ay ." Callie found herself struggle to say the four letters word . The kisses was lovely but quite distracting on the same time as she was now marinating the chicken .
"Okay , what ?" Arizona was eyeing the love bite on Callie's neck from last night's event . She grinned , a little bit proud of her own work .
Callie knew that Arizona was smiling as she asked . Simply because of the voice the blonde was making , a voice of pure happiness . "Okay , I will go to New York with you next weekend ."
"Okay ?" Arizona asked again , just to be clear .
"Okay ." Callie giggled . "Now go , you have onions to be chopped ."
Yeah , they are finally in their happy place . Together , going strong than ever . Maybe , just maybe she finally might get her happy ending ..
Maybe ?
Author's Note : A few of you have been PMing me , asking how I have been doing (thanks !) and asking if this story is somehow really real because it looks like that I seem to be so connected to the main characters . And as I have always said early in the story , Arizona's character is really close to myself and Callie's character is based on someone that very special to me . But just yesterday a reader asked about the character of Joanne (it was quite weird that someone asked this because I thought no one is really paying attention to Arizona's late wife as this is a Calzona story but .. okay) . Is her character is also based on someone ..? I did reply personally to the reader about Joanne . And as I typed a message for the reader , I just realized something that I never dare to admitted to anyone in daylight (but I will just say it here because no one actually knows who I am in here..) .. I lost a really good friend back then in 2009 . She was my childhood best friend and we were really close . And she was also that friend that you had a crush on but afraid to tell because for the friendship's sake . I was actually smitten with her in secret but just chose to keep my mouth shut , I think it was better that way . She was my friend but then I moved to a new school , lost contact with her and one day , one of our friend informed me that she died in a car accident . I knew this like five days after she passed away . So .. I don't know . I never planned to write Joanne's based on anyone but somehow .. a piece of her is in my story .
RIP , my dear friend . Always in my heart and my mind . 1996 - 2009 .
Friday
24th March 2017
0415hrs
