A/N: Thank you to all who have read, reviewed, or made this a favourite. And I appreciate all who have reached out. My own health and work schedule have presented their own challenges to my writing schedule and your words of support spur me to push myself. Thank you.

Soak is part of a series that started with Ache. Ache was originally written as a one-shot (Chapter One) but evolved into this series encompassing many years and stages in the lives of two complicated characters. As a result, you may find this story takes some time to finish.

Although rooted in cannon, I have taken certain liberties beyond that. You may find some elements of the Ache series (as a whole) are not Pottermore compliant.

I own neither the world of nor the characters within the Harry Potter universe and I say thanks every day for JKR sharing Harry and his world with us.


1 August 1995

"I thought I heard something," Minerva replied without thinking hoping that her lie would be enough to satisfy Sirius Black.

Black dropped the sandwich that had been hanging out of his mouth and pulled his wand out. He glanced up and down the corridor.

Minerva realised quickly how foolish her lie had been. Saying one had heard something at 3:00 in the morning in the safe house of a secret, illegal resistance organisation had not been her finest lie.

"Kreacher," he Sirius said in whisper.

The aged house elf appeared from around the corner, the skin hanging off his large, sagging ears was only amplified in its horror in the dark.

"Yes," the elf hissed.

"Who is in the house?" Sirius asked. "How many souls are in this house?"

House elves had the ability to detect people within the home of the master they serve.

"Well besides myself, there is you master and you Professor," Kreacher said sourly. "The werewolf, six Weasleys-" the elf grumbled something under his breath that Minerva couldn't hear.

"The mud-blood and your half-breed cousin," the house elf said defiantly as he eyed his Master. "Shacklebolt, the demon Moody, your winged beast. And another."

"Who?" Sirius asked.

"Who?" Kreacher replied looking at his master.

"Who did you not name?" Sirius said as his frustration grew.

"I don't know Master," Kreacher said.

Sirius shoved his wand at Kreacher.

"Who else is in the house?" Sirius demanded.

"I don't know Master," Kreacher repeated.

"I order you to tell me," Sirius said as he pushed his wand closer to the elf.

"Master, I cannot tell you what I don't know," Kreacher said as he took a low bow.

Minerva pulled out her wand as she and Sirius exchanged a glance.

Sirius walked over to the door across the corridor and gave it a light knock.

"Remus can wake up the rest of the floor," Sirius said softly.

A moment later Remus Lupin opened his door, halfway through putting on a tattered dressing gown.

"What's happened?" Lupin asked with a yawn.

"Someone's in the house," Sirius whispered.

Lupin nodded and headed down the dark corridor to wake the next room. Sirius headed downstairs to search the main floor. Minerva headed upstairs. She would start by the window that lead to the roof and work her way down to meet the others.


As she came up the stairs to the top floor Minerva noted the window was closed. Moonlight streamed in and illuminated a small part at the end of the corridor. Using light from her wand, Minerva opened the first door and found only an abandoned storage room. Minerva quickly deduced the next two rooms were equally as unoccupied as the first.

As she approached the fourth room she noticed the "R.A.B." carved onto the door and immediately knew she would be entering the room of the late Regulus Black. Minerva felt a sense of trepidation as her fingers twisted around the aged bronze knob and she turned it slowly.

Inside, the room appeared to be impeccably kept despite the condition of the other bedrooms in the home. There was a large, four-poster bed. Rich, velvet curtains were pulled back and neatly tied to reveal an ornately carved sapele wood headboard featuring a crab, the symbol of patience and cunning.

Minerva ran her hand along the smooth top of the desk that sat at the end of the room. Writing paper featuring the Black family crest adorned the top along with a fine, untouched ostrich feather quill. In a black and white photograph a young, smiling Regulus was playfully roughhousing with a young Jameson Avery and Priscilla Parkinson.

Minerva was about to move on to the next room when a small glass case in the corner of the room caught her eye. Casting her wand light in the direction of the mysterious object, Minerva felt a twinge of ache from the mark on her shoulder. Minerva found her feet moving methodically as she was drawn closer and closer to the case. It was as if a voice was calling to her. Her mind strained to listen as she was unable to decipher the whispers that clouded her mind.

Her wand light had created an eerie glow around the case. And there it was - just below the glass - was a locket Minerva had not seen in many years.

She carefully lifted the case of the glass. Her fingers hesitated just above the locket. The whispering had grown more intense. Minerva allowed her fingers to softly trace the green tourmaline 'S' that was encrusted on the top of the gold locket. Gently, she lifted the locket off of the crushed velvet upon which it sat. She allowed the chain to dangle as she held the locket in her right hand and examined it under the light of her wand.

Minerva could feel a warm ache emanating from the mark on her shoulder. It seemed to grow, not unpleasantly, as Minerva drew the locket closer.

"Minerva? Minerva?" Arthur Weasley's hand on her shoulder drew her out of the trance.

Minerva felt like she had just emerged from being underwater.

"I- I'm sorry Arthur," she said as she regained a sense of her surroundings. She was clasping the locket next to her chest and she hoped that the he couldn't see it her hand.

Minerva turned around to see Sirius Black and Remus Lupin standing in the doorway staring at her.

"I'm sorry," Minerva said. "I spaced out for a moment. I'm very tired."

"We've cleared the rest of the house," Sirius said. "We didn't find anyone and there's no trace of anyone coming or going."

"Moody is conducting a sweep with his eye to ensure we haven't missed anything," Remus added.

Arthur asked Minerva to join them downstairs as the the order members present would be meeting to discuss a rotating guard schedule.

Minerva slipped the locket into the pocket of her dressing gown and followed the three men down to the kitchen.


"We'll do a walk-through every hour while on duty," Remus explained to the group as he outlined the rotating guard schedule.

Sirius was beaming. He'd been feeling left as he wasn't able to help guard the prophecy or leave Grimmauld Place. It was relieving that he would finally have the opportunity to be useful to the Order - even if it was just guarding his own house.

Minerva ran her thumb across the front of the locket unconsciously as Remus continued to walk the group through the procedure.

Until further notice, everyone would be on high alert. The Order didn't take chances with spaces after the Burnhaven incident.

Burnhaven had been a country home owned by the Bones family for generations. Starting in 1976, the Order had occupied Burnhaven. It was used as both a safe house and the Headquarters.

Minerva would never forget New Years Eve 1977. Most of the Order had been at Burnhaven and the mood had been festive. The night before they had intercepted a young Ministry employee and his wife moments before an attack by Death Eaters. They had moved them in to the safe house at Burnhaven until they could relocate them to safety.

But it had all been a ruse. The Ministry employee and his wife had been planted and the tip the Order had gotten about their attack had all been an effort to plant two Death Eaters into Burnhaven.

Edgar and Mallory Bones and their four children had been murdered that night along with Benjy Fenwick, Roger Jones, and Alfie Addington who's death Minerva had witnessed firsthand as they had been sharing a bed at the time - not that they had been in a relationship. Minerva and Alfie had been friends that had taken comfort in one another after sharing a drunken kiss earlier in the evening.

Minerva had barely made it out alive. Alfie hadn't.

And ever since Burnhaven, the Order had created a strict policy separating Headquarters from safe houses.

"Minerva?" the sound of Alastor Moody's voice startled her.

"Hmm?" She replied in a faraway voice.

"I was asking if you would be alright taking the shift tomorrow with Sirius," Moody said.

"That's fine," Minerva replied automatically as her fingers tightened around the locket in the pocket of her dressing gown.


Minerva didn't remember leaving the meeting but somehow she'd made it upstairs. Glancing around she checked to make sure there was no one in the corridor. Seeing that it was deserted, Minerva unlocked Severus's room and stepped in.

He still hadn't returned and Minerva knew it would do her no good to worry.

Laying down on the bed, Minerva continued to run the locket through her fingers. She was staring at the ceiling as she pondered how this locket could have wound up in Grimmauld Place. She was certain it was the same locket she had seen all those years before.

Carefully she pulled it out of her pocket and held it up as she examined it. She knew it was the same locket. She could feel it. And she knew that she needed to turn it over to Dumbledore.

But at the moment she couldn't bring herself to send him an owl. She would inform him in the morning. But at the moment she found she couldn't bear to let it go. It was a bittersweet feeling holding the locket knowing that it had been so important to Tom - knowing that it contained a part of him.

It was an odd feeling holding a piece of your former lover's soul while laying on your current lover's bed. It was strange to think about Tom while trying to keep herself from focusing on Severus's safety.

Minerva fell asleep clutching the locket.


Minerva hadn't noticed the house elf that had been hidden in the shadows. Kreacher knew she had the locket and he knew that she was the great traitor. Mrs Black never trusted her. Mrs Black had long lamented that the McGonagall woman had been fool for failing to fulfil the "great responsibility" required of a pureblood witch.

Kreacher could sense that the locket was important to her and he feared that if he didn't get it back he would never be able to destroy it like Master Regulas had tasked him to do.

So as quietly as possible, Kreacher slid into the room and extracted the locket from her hands. With a wave of his small, wrinkled hand Kreacher used his power to block her memories from the last few hours. She'd feel hungover in the morning, but she wouldn't remember ever finding the locket.

Slipping back out of the room as quietly as he had entered, Kreacher crept off down the darkness of the corridor.


In Falmouth, the sun would be up in an hour or two. Severus was seated between Yaxley and Lucius in the dining room. Across the table, La Tour swirled a wine glass as an elderly house elf poured what Severus thought must be blood into the glass. La Tour dismissed the elf with a wave of his hand. It backed off from the table with a deep bow and disappeared into the darkness.

The mood around the table was tense. At one end, Thorfin Rowlfe was whispering quietly with the Carrow siblings. Leena Dolohov, Velma Rosier, and Narcissa Malfoy were in deep conversation. But Severus kept his eyes fixated on the unoccupied chair at the head of the table. It seemed like more people had arrived at the house and Severus had a sinking feeling he wasn't going to be able to leave in the morning.

A moment later the door swung open and the Dark Lord swept into the dining room with Wormtail scurrying behind him. Everyone stood as the Dark Lord made his way down to the seat at the end of the table. One he was seated he smiled sickeningly and waved them all down.

Severus kept his head low and tried to avoid making eye contact.

"Where is guest?" the Dark Lord asked.

"He's sleeping off the booze," La Tour laughed.

"Go fetch our guest, Wormtail," the Dark Lord commanded. Wormtail scurried out of the room.

Severus realised they were talking about Slughorn. Slughorn was not a dark wizard. He'd never been a death eater. But he'd certainly run close to those circles and they'd been after the poor man for years. Severus knew the Dark Lord had tried desperately to capture Slughorn during the first war.

"And how are things at work, Yaxley?" The Dark Lord hissed as he ran his long, pale fingers across Nagini. The snake slid behind the chair and curled up on a rug in front of La Tour's fireplace.

"Things are well my Lord," Yaxley responded. "I believe Jasper Jugson is ready to join us."

The Dark Lord nodded in approval. His gaze turned to Thorfin Rowlfe at the end of the table.

"And for you, Thorfin?" he asked as his red eyes settled on Rowlfe.

"My Lord," Thorfin said bowing his head. "As you know I believe Jeffery Travers is sympathetic to our cause and shares our beliefs."

Rowlfe paused and brushed his shaggy, sandy hair out of his eyes. He slowly raised his head.

"And his wife has expressed a desire to get involved financially," Rowlfe added.

The Dark Lord's smile grew wider.

"That's very good indeed," he said as he leaned back in his chair.

"And Severus," the Dark Lord added as his gaze turned to the Potions master. "Surely you cannot provide any recruits from amongst the Hogwarts staff. Perhaps you could provide me with information?"

"What do you desire to know?" Severus asked as he tried to keep his mind focused.

"Where is Dumbledore?" The Dark Lord asked.

"He's travelling," Severus replied honestly. "He was in London briefly to see the Ministry. But I believe he's back on the continent now."

"Do you know where he's travelling to?" the Dark Lord pressed.

"I do not know for sure, My Lord," Severus said. "But based on how quickly he was able to return, I suspect he was in Calais."

It was a carefully crafted response and one that would place Dumbledore in no danger. The Headmaster often frequented Calais during the summer months. Severus knew this as did the Dark Lord.

"That's an educated guess," the Dark Lord responded. "And what of the Order?"

Severus paused. He had dreaded this question.

"I know of some members but I doubt their names would come as a surprise," Severus said carefully.

"My source tells me they are operating out of Dartford," the Dark Lord replied.

"I have suspected there's a place in or near London," Severus answered. He was cautious. The Dark Lord could be testing him and he could ill afford a misstep.

"But you have never been there?" the Dark Lord said as he leaned forward and looked at Severus.

"No, my Lord," Severus replied as he looked up and allowed the Dark Lord to enter his mind.

"My suspicion is based on Dumbledore's absence," Severus said hoping to steer the Dark Lord toward a particular memory. "Minerva McGonagall has been running Hogwarts in his absence and she's twice requested we meet in London to discuss school affairs for the upcoming term."

Severus allowed the Dark Lord to see Severus and Minerva meeting outside of a Flourish and Blots.

"Severus does your NEWT class really require Dado's entire set?" Minerva complained as she carefully scanned a list he had provided her. "That's awfully expensive for us to expect students to provide."

"Then buy a two sets for the library," Severus snapped.

He stopped and turned to look at her. She stopped reading the list when she realised he was staring at her. She looked up and met his eyes.

"Dado's set is the most comprehensive out there and it is an essential text for anyone studying to be a healer or for entrance into Newcastle," Severus said. Newcastle Brewer's Association was a professional association of Potions Masters that offered a one year advanced study course for aspiring masters. It was very selective and Severus typically had one or two students a year looking for entrance. Dado's complete set would be required reading for anyone hoping to gain entrance into the exclusive program.

"Well why didn't you mention it before?" Minerva asked.

"Because Professor Dumbledore didn't feel it was necessary," Severus replied with a sour look.

"Right then," Minerva said as she cleared her throat and went back to the list. "We'll get two sets for the library."

The stones the lined the shops along Diagon Alley began to swirl together as the Dark Lord pulled out of his memory. He seemed satisfied.

"I see," the Dark Lord replied.

"She was wearing a muggle dress," Severus replied. "She had obviously come through London and not from Hogwarts."

"And you have been at Hogwarts all summer?" the Dark Lord asked.

"I've stayed between Hogwarts and my home in Cokeworth," Severus answered. This was, of course, only partially true. Severus had spent an evening in Cokeworth and some time at Hogwarts. But as of late, he'd spent most of his nights in London with Minerva.

"I see," the Dark Lord said as he folded his hands together. "You will find where their base of operations is and report back to me by the end of August."

"Yes, my Lord," Severus said as he bowed his head.

Wormtail had reemerged and he was approaching the Dark Lord in a deep bow.

"My-my Lord," he stammered.

"Where is our guest, Wormtail?" the Dark Lord asked as he eyes narrowed.

"He-he," Wormtail choked. "He's gone."

Despite the hair on the back of his neck standing on end, Severus appeared calm. The Dark Lord's calm reaction made Severus all the more nervous. Voldemort sighed and glanced over to La Tour. The Dark Lord grinned and soon both the Dark Lord and La Tour were laughing. Severus knew better than to participate.

In an instant, La Tour neck snapped back as his hands slammed down on the table. His eyes grew wide and it was clear the vampire was in intense pain. The Dark Lord continued laughing as he held one slender, white hand out toward La Tour.

"You've broken your promise, Rene," the Dark Lord said. "I am very disappointed."

La Tour's red eyes bulged and he was unable to speak.

"This disloyalty shall not be forgotten," the Dark Lord continued as he voice dropped. "You will find him. And you will return him to me."

With the wave of the Dark Lord's hand, whatever painful hold he'd had on La Tour stopped. The vampire cleared his throat and adjusted his shirt collar. He nodded slowly, his lithe frame shaking. La Tour gripped his arms across his best protectively and bowed his head.

"Find him," the Dark Lord commanded.


An hour later, Severus was readying himself to leave. He'd shared an uncomfortable breakfast with his fellow death eaters and was quite eager to escape La Tour's house of horrors. They'd searched the house and grounds for any sign of Slughorn. But the old wizard had proven his worth in managing to slip out without a trace. Severus suspected Slughorn was likely hiding nearby. The old man was clever, but certainly not fast. And Severus had to admit that for as flamboyant a man as he was, Slughorn was certainly capable of blending in when he wanted to.

Severus suspected Slughorn was somewhere nearby, likely hiding in plain sight.

And to Severus's delight, Slughorn's hasty retreat had meant Severus was now in possession of the old man's Slug Club scrapbook.

He was thankful that the Dark Lord had found something else to occupy himself with after an hour and they had been allowed to return and prepare to leave.

Severus was, for once, thankful for his job. The upcoming school term would mean he would likely have to conveniently skip much of the late night, playboy lifestyle that La Tour and many of the Death Eaters lived. Death Eaters like Lucius that had never held actual jobs had plenty of time for late night escapades. Severus was quite certain Malfoy had never done any work aside from managing his estate. Yaxley only worked at the Ministry out of desire - he'd certainly never had a need.

Severus realised as he walked out of La Tour's home and down toward a safe apparition point how truly out of place he was. As he nodded to Yaxley on his way out he came to fully appreciate how thankful he was for not being one of the society wizards. Severus could retreat to Hogwarts, or Cokeworth, or even his room at Grimmauld Place and escape the darkness for a time.

And for once in his life, Severus intended to not escape alone.

But first, he would need to make a small stop that would also conveniently serve as cover in case he was being followed.

When he reached the edge of the La Tour estate's property, Severus found the small graveyard that served as the apparition point. With a small pop he disappeared.


Severus had been thankful he'd decided to stop off in Diagon Alley before pretending to head off to Hogwarts. He'd been standing in a que at Obscurus Books when he'd caught a glimpse of Walden Macnair watching him from across the street.

Macnair had never been subtle. Out of the corner of his eye, Severus had seen Macnair standing across the street leaning against the building just watching the window.

After Severus had paid the clerk, he'd decided to make one more stop at Sugarplum's and Macnair had clumsily tailed him down past the shoppes and stalls that dotted the twisting road. Severus had decided then that with Macnair on his tail he'd best make it look like he was heading out of the city.

Severus had made his way down toward the Leaky Cauldron before summoning the Knight Bus to take him to King's Cross Station. Macnair had then watched him board the Hogwarts Express. Severus waited until Macnair had walked away before stepping off the train moments before it's departure.

As a Hogwarts professor, Severus could ride the train between Hogsmeade and London whenever he pleased. The train ran twice a week between London and Scotland and Severus was fortunate that today was one of the days the train was running.

Severus had then quickly made his way to Grimmauld Place where he was now waiting to be allowed in. It was nearly eleven and Severus was already feeling worn by the day's events. The August heat of London was starting to get to Severus and he was beginning to regret being outdoors for so long.

A moment later, the door cracked open and Remus poked his out the door.

"What was the last meal we ate together?" Remus asked.

"Severus," Remus said. "I'm glad to see you."

Severus scoffed internally.

"We had an incident last night," Remus went on. "And we could use your help."

Severus gave Lupin a curt nod in response. Although he wanted nothing more than a nap, he knew that the incident - whatever it was - took precedent.

Severus followed Lupin through the main foyer and into a side room. It wasn't typically used by the order and it appeared the crowd in the room was a smaller, select group of members.

Kinglsey Shacklebolt, Molly and Arthur Weasley, Sirius Black, Alastor Moody, and Minerva were waiting for them.

"What's happened?" Severus asked. He was tired. He didn't have time for pleasantries. He wanted to go to bed.

"Minerva heard a noise early this morning," Kingsley explained. "There was someone in the house."

"How do you know?" Severus asked.

"I asked Kreacher to identify who was on the property. There was someone else in the house. Not one of us," Sirius added. "He could sense the presence but we don't know who was inside or how long they were here."

"What did you hear, Minerva?" Severus asked her aloud.

Their eyes met. She didn't break eye contact.

"I think it was just Black coming up the stairs," Minerva replied. "I don't think I heard whoever was here."

Minerva didn't want to be answering this question. There had clearly been someone in the house but she couldn't admit the group she'd just been sneaking out to check if her lover had returned from a late night rendezvous with their enemy.

Black insisted he had neither seen nor heard anything out of the norm during his own late night tryst with the ice box.

"All I saw was Minerva coming out of Severus's room," Sirius added as he turned his gaze to Minerva.

"Well it's the room closest to mine," she replied calmly. She wasn't about show Sirius how rattled she was by his comment. "It's protocol to notify another member in the event of an intruder."

"But I was on duty," Sirius replied. "You knew I would be awake."

You know better than to be reckless, Minerva. She heard Severus say to her through legilimency. Their eyes met again and he held her gaze.

"No need to be ashamed, Minerva," Severus said suddenly. Sirius's weren't the only eyebrows to rise at the potion maker's comment.

Oi? What the hell do you think you're doing? Minerva snapped back at Severus. He'd gone off his rocker.

"You don't trust me," Severus said aloud.

"That is an absolutely absurd assumption," Minerva replied in an icy tone.

Ah yes! Severus said in their internal, private dialogue. The McGonagall alliteration. Have you ever notice you only do that when you're upset?

The two Professors stared at each other. Minerva's brow was furrowed and the other Order members could sense the tension.

"I'm not upset," Minerva replied aloud by accident. She'd meant to say it only to Sevuers. She realized her mistake. Her eyes grew wide momentarily before they narrowed again as she shot a dark look at the Potions Master.

"You don't trust me," Severus repeated. "It's fine. I'm used to it."

"I trust you," Minerva said adamently.

"I said it's fine, Minerva," Severus said calmly. "I understand completely."

Minerva sat back in the ancient armchair and made no attempt to hide her displeasure. Kingsley sighed as the meeting seemed to be at an impasse.

"Why don't you trust him?" Sirius asked.

Murmurs spread through the group. Sirius's question appeared to disturb the other Order members. Minerva scoffed and Severus looked smug.

"This isn't productive," Arthur Weasley said in an attempt to redirect the conversation.

"Well this is my house and I want to know why she doesn't trust him," Sirius reiterated.

The room grew quiet.

"Well we can't all be perfect little cubs," Severus sneered. "Why would it surprise you that the White Queen of all that is great and good have a natural suspicion of someone like me."

"Severus, please," Minerva said softly. She'd shuddered at his use of the "White Queen" nickname. It had often been used by Slytherin students when she was a much younger professor as a disparagement for her straight-laced nature.

"Severus, we need your expertise in this matter," Kinglsey explained. "Would you be kind enough to sweep the house and let us know if you find anything?"

"And I would appreciate Professor McGonagall's help in the search," Severus said as he bowed to the Auror.


"Well I had to do something to throw them all off," Severus said once they were alone upstairs. "You have to admit it was quite brilliant."

"It wasn't brilliant!" Minerva snapped. "It was brainless."

The two were examing the top floor for any trace of how an intruder had entered, exited, or left any kind of jinx or spying equipment. Thus far, their search had turned up nothing. Grimmauld Place was unplottable but the house elf couldn't have lied about an extra soul in the home. Their search of the other three floors had turned up nothing.

"You know there's another possibility here," Minerva said.

She regretted the suggestion, but it had to be raised. As much as she wanted to think she could trust every member of the second order there was always the possibility of betrayal - coerced or voluntary.

Minerva's hand paused on the doorknob of a room labeled "R.A.B." She knew it could be none other than the late Regulas Black's. Minerva tried the handle but found it wouldn't budge.

"Alohamora," she whispered but the knob remained steadfast.

She next tried several more advanced unlocking spells but was unable to make the door budge. With a wave of her wand a small patronus shot out and down the dark of the hallway.

"That's odd," Severus replied. "This has been the only unoccupied door that's been locked."

"KREACHER!" Sirius bellowed as he beckoned the house elf.

The crotchety, wrinkled house elf emerged from the shadows and bowed deeply.

"Unlock the door," Sirius commanded.

Once inside, Minerva and Severus scanned the room for any signs of an intruder.

"Who locked the door? And why was it locked?" Minerva asked.

"I will not answer to blood traitors," Kreacher replied as he turned his head dramatically away from Minerva.

"Answer her," Sirius commanded as he leaned down toward the house elf.

"I locked it," Kreacher snarled. "So no grubby childrenses or half breeds or traitors be defiling Master Regulus's quarters."

Minerva's eyes scanned the room. There didn't seem to be anything out of place. However, she find herself being drawn to the corner of the room over and over again. There was an empty glass case sitting in the far corner.

"Minerva?" Severus asked as she walked toward it.

She lifted the glass case and found only a small clean spot where no dust lay. It was as if an object that had long sat in that in spot had been recently removed. She felt a small tingle on the mark on her shoulder and was overcome by a feeling of familiarity.

"Minerva?" Severus repeated.

"It's nothing," she said as she turned around.

The pair made eye contact and Minerva could tell he didn't believe her excuse.

"What was there?" Severus asked the house elf.

"Did you remove anything from this room, Kreacher?" Sirius questioned.

"No, sir," Kreacher said with a low bow.

Technically, it wasn't a lie. Kreacher thought to himself. The traitorous whore had taken the locket from the room.


Later that evening Severus and Minerva were sitting in his room. Minerva was sitting on the bed reading the latest issue of The Pitch, the biggest Quidditch magazine in the world. She was keen on the Magpies having a good season but she knew Arrows had traded Ulster for a new keeper. It meant they'd be a force to reckon with if they could get their defense in line.

Tomorrow the two would be participating in the plan to move Potter from his Aunt's home to London. There would be two teams. The first team would would be a decoy. They'd leave as soon as the muggles were gone. Mienrva and Severus were both a part of the first team. Later, a second team would swoop in, collect Potter, and bring him to Grimmauld Place.

"I'm meeting with Oliver Wood tomorrow afternoon," Minerva explained. "He's expressed a desire to join the Order."

"Wood?" Severus replied mindlessly. "Isn't he bit thick?"

"Hardly," Minerva snapped. "He's a good lad."

Severus was sitting in a dusty armchair in the corner. He was looking at the photos from the Slug Cub scrapbook that Slughorn had failed to take with him during his hasty exit.

"You'll never guess who I ran into last night," Severus said.

"The Dark Lord," Minerva replied sarcastically without looking up from her magazine.

"Well, aside from him," Severus said as he flipped a page in the album.

She did not respond.

"None other than Horace Slughorn," Severus said with a slow drawl.

"Really? And was he - you know," Minerva asked.

"No," Severus said quickly. "They're really trying to recruit him. And he knows it. He snuck off in the middle of the night. He's on the run now."

"I wonder if he'd consider returning to Hogwarts?" Minerva said as she thought aloud. Slughorn was a competent teacher. He could be insufferable at times but he was certainly a skilled professor.

"And what then? I'd get the Defense post?" Severus said with a grin.

"Don't be silly," Minerva said quickly. "I'm suggesting we replace you. Perhaps we could bring him on in a limited capacity? Like a NEWT level elective alchemy course or a theorhetical elementals course? It's a pity we don't teach elementals anymore."

"Indeed," Severus agreed. "How many NEWT level subjects were there during your time as a student? Didn't you have like a whopping twenty NEWTs or something?"

"Seventeen," Minerva corrected without looking up. "But your point is well taken. Our cirriculam offerings have decreased."

"What was Hogwarts like then?" Severus asked. "Were you one of old Slughorn's Slug Club members?"

Minerva pulled a bookmark from the nightstand. She placed in the magazine and then carefully set the magazine down on the nightstand and folder her hands in her lap.

"Out with it," Minerva said sharply as she stared at him over the glasses that had fallen to the end of her nose.

Severus raised his eyebrow.

"Don't play dumb. It doesn't suite you," Minerva snapped. "Out with it. I know you've got something on your mind."

"There's a lot I don't know about you," Severus said honestly. "And the more I look the more questions arise."

"What do you mean by 'the more I look'?" Minerva responded as voice slowed. There was a beat.

"Between Dumbledore and the Dark Lord my life is all lies and cover ups," Severus explained. "Can we not have that with us?"

"What did you mean by 'the more I look'?" Minerva repeated her question.

"And you guarantee these work?" Sirius asked as he examined the small, fleshy piece that looked like a human ear.


Sirius had suspected the Weasley twins had been eavesdropping on the Order. After the outburst at the meeting earlier in the day, Sirius was keen to find out why Minerva was suspicious of Severus. However, it was obvious Severus had put sound dampening charms on his room. The twins had caught Sirius attempting to listen into the room earlier and they knew it was prime opportunity to sell a pair of extendable ears.

The twins had assured Sirius that the extendable ears were, in fact, foolproof. Sirius had gladly handed over a small pile of galleons for the listenting device. He had to admit, in the short time he'd gotten to know the twins he was highly impressed with their ingenuity.


"I allowed you access to Moody's file because I trusted you," Minerva said feeling betrayed. "You had no right to look at my personel file."

"I just want you to be open with me," Severus said.

"About what?" Minerva said as she stood up. She was fuming.

Crossing behind the bed she found herself standing face to face with Severus.

"Why do you have the mark?" Severus asked. "Why the scars? Who did this to you?"

He ran his hand along her forearm. She pulled her arms behind herself. She didn't want him anywhere near her at the moment.

"You don't understand what you're asking," Minerva said defensively. "You really don't understand what you're asking."


Outside of the room, Sirirus was slowly lowering one of the extendable ears down toward the foot of the door. Holding the second ear close to his own he bagan to adjust the tuning dial. After few moments of static, he was able to narrow in on the noise in the room. He was shocked to hear two voices having what sounded like an argument.

"Did you know who he was?" Severus said as he showed her the picture he'd found hidden in behind another photo in Slughorn's possession.

Minerva took the photograph from him and stared down at it.

"I know it's you," Severus said. "What are you not telling me?"

She did not reply. She ran her fingers across the photo as she stared at the two young people in it. It felt like it was entirely different lifetime.

"I just want to understand," he said pressing her for information.

She was avoiding eye contact. He couldn't tell if she was genuinely transfixed on the photo or intentionally delaying her response.

"Please," he said.

"You don't understand," she said angrily as she finally met his eyes.

"Then HELP ME understand," he shouted.

Outside, Sirius had heard enough. He summoned Kreacher and demanded that he open the door.

"You came into my life, uninvited I might add, and you introduce me to this part of you to gain my trust," Severus said angrily. "You expect me to trust you while you're running around with all of these secrets."

"I told you I was never a Death Eater," she replied in a raised voice. "And that's true."

"So what then? Were you imperioused? Were you a spy?" He shouted back at her.

"Frankly it's none of your damn business," she replied coldly.

He knew she was right. There was no reason he needed to know. She had never pressed him for informaiton or stories of his time as a Death Eater. Whenever something triggered a memory or a feeling of guilt she'd always tried to redirect him to his work. She would tell him there was goodness in him. She would try to convince to be kinder with students. And occassionally she would joke that Hogwarts was a penance for the past.

The door flew open and Sirius Black stepped into the room.

"What's going on here? Is he bothering you, Minerva?" Sirius asked as he eyed Severus.

"Get out," Severus said slowly without looking at Sirius.

"Everything is fine, Sirius," Minerva said unconvincingly. "Thank you for checking."

"It's alright if you don't trust him," Sirius urged. "I certainly don't."

"But I do trust him," she said sadly as she stepped away. "Goodnight Professor."

She bowed and walked out of the room with Sirius in tow. The door closed behind them leaving Severus alone.

In the corridor, Sirius was concerned about the argument he'd just interrupted.

"Minerva, if there's something I should know I think now would be a good time," he said.

She knew that he meant well and that whatever explanation she offered was likely going to raise suspicion.

"It's Hogwarts business," she lied. "A disagreement about the role of Head of House. Despite the war we still have a school to run."

Sirius nodded. He didn't fully buy her explanation but he knew it wasn't worth pressing for more information.


Severus couldn't sleep. He'd been laying in bed, staring at the ceiling for the better part of the last hour. He knew Minerva was right. Her past was none of his business. He wanted to know why it mattered to him. As he lay there with his eyes tracing the cracks in the plaster, an uncomfortable realisation dawned on him.

In 15 years Severus had never spoken openly to anyone about his pain, his guilt, nor his childhood. Dumbledore was all business and his discussion with Severus about the past only went as far as they could be used as a means to an end. Dumbledore didn't have the time to deal with Severus's theraputic needs. And he knew Dumbledore would never understand.

He suspected he wanted to know the details of Minerva's past out of some weakness to feel like he wasn't alone. As much as he'd lived his life of solitude as atonement for his past. After his years of self-punishment he felt he deserved someone to confide in that understood. He did feel that Minerva was the only one that could comprehend.

And it hurt deeply that she'd shut him out.