It took me five bars, some thirty license plates.

Cersei Lannister was in a rage.

I saw her mustang.

As soon as she saw Jaime's mustang in the parking lot of Tyrion's bar in King's Landing, there was no going back.

And my eyes filled up with rage.

She was almost seeing red.

I brought my pistol, but I ain't some kinda fool.

If only she had her gun on her.

So I walked right in barehanded.

But she somehow came to her senses.

She was on his arm while he was playin' pool.

Jaime and Sansa were over by the pool tables, and Sansa was hugging on his arm.

Just like I used to do.

But Cersei could never get away with that, in public.

She kissed him while I got a beer.

Jaime had to keep himself from going into a full-on makeout session with Sansa.

She didn't think I'd show up here.

They didn't even see her walk in.

I'm a crazy ex-girlfriend.

Nothing had ever made her rage this much.

I watched her for a while, but I, didn't like her walk.

It's like Sansa walked in any slutty way.

Came across kinda cheap to me, but hey, how's that my fault?

But everyone had to think Cersei's way.

She looked at my man like he didn't have on a stitch.

Sansa only looked at Jaime with love in her eyes, nothing else.

Somebody tell that girl,

Cersei didn't have the sense to use her words at that moment.

Step up to the plate I wanna pitch.

Oh, if only he had a baseball bat.

Little bitch.

But, she only considered Sansa to be a whore.

Well, those pretty girls can play their game,

Daenerys Targaryen, Margaery Tyrell, and even Olenna Tyrell were more than willing to come to Sansa's defense.

But they're damn well gonna know my name.

But she had to remind them who she was.

I'm a crazy ex-girlfriend.

Everyone knew she was insane before this.

I started throwin' hands, and I scared folks half to death.

She started grabbing people's drinks and throwing them at the floor.

I got up in his face, smelled whiskey on his breath.

Jaime was drinking Macallan scotch, he had class.

Didn't give a second thought to bein' thrown in jail.

Cersei wasn't worried about jail, her father would get her out, wouldn't he?

'Cause baby, to a hammer, everything looks like a nail.

She just wanted to get her way.

I'm mad as hell.

There wasn't enough alcohol in the world to get her drunk enough to control her rage.

Well, those pretty girls they're all the same.

Cersei wasn't concerned about anyone but herself, and her oldest child.

But they're damn well gonna know my name.

And everyone wanted to forget the name of Cersei Lannister.

I'm a crazy ex-girlfriend.

This wasn't her first rodeo.

I'm a crazy ex-friend.

It certainly wouldn't be her last.

I'm a crazy ex-girlfriend.

Until someone shut her up.

I'm a crazy ex-girlfriend.