4

The lonely quest

Link sent word to general Fallder about the new recruits and the guard of the castle that had been recently posted to the duty. I was hard for him to do anything without the princess' eye fixed upon him. Whatever he could do without drawing attention, had to be completely alone, this however arose suspicion. Zelda attempted repeatedly to have a word with Link, he on the other hand found an excuse not to, also to not answer the questions she could make in one instant.

But he realized then that he had been planning enough for his quest, that he was leaving the matters in order without actually having a lead to the dark dominion.

One more time he searched within his own wisdom and experience just to realize he had not the answer. Wisdom, he thought was not his own to seek, but that of the sages and of the elders, they were the ones to seek after. After all the dark dominion had not laws of it's own but laws of this world, the balance was to be respected. They could explain about it.

He had the thought of who might be able to solve the puzzle. He left the room where he had been writing the letters and orders to General Fallder and went to the stables, there he saddled Epona and left towards the Kokiri forest.

Quickly under the sun he found the entrance, kneeling next to it, he felt the cold breeze the stone filtered, as damp as always. He stood firmly and walked through the darkness and the sudden flash of yellow light at the end of the tunnel. He could hear it while in the vacuum of transition: crickets, children's laughter and the sound of flute; a curious visitor had been charged the cost of wandering inside the forbidden forest. As he walked the roped bridge above the field of the lost woods, he heard the wood creaking and far away the overlapping conversations.

There it was the village, where he grew up; the houses were the trees of which the Kokiri had been born. Many of the children ceased their conversation to gaze at the visitor, some other went inside their houses but one, and only one stood up and spoke to the tall one, not to greet him but to antagonize.

"What are you doing here?" the child asked.

"Drh'oganmish Mido" Link greeted in Kokiri.

"Don't speak to me in Kokiri, you are not one of us and never will be." Mido used the repellent tone with Link because he hated everything foreign and because Link held Sariah's affection and the Deku Tree's good graces.

"Yet it is the tongue I speak better"

"You come here again and again. I do not know why you do it. The only thing you should do is return that to us" and he pointed at the Kokiri sword on Link's belt.

"Do you want my steel, Mido?" in the blink of an eye Link took the blade and held its edge against Mido's throat. "Shall I leave in there?"

Mido slapped Link's hand away and went back to his house at normal pace. Link sheathed the sword and walked towards Sariah's home. There she was pulling out weeds from around her home. "Hello Link" she said without turning her head and still pulling the weeds. "How did you know I was here?" Link asked since he made not a sound.

"I heard you speaking to Mido" she turned and smiled. "I am glad to see you"

Link nodded his head and approached Sariah; she kept her sweet smile as she swept her green hair away from her eyes. "What do you need?" she asked as she stood up. "I should like this to be an encounter among friends with only glad thoughts; but that is asking too much. I speak not darkly but truthfully for I know you are neither familiar with such notions nor could understand them."

"I do need to ask you something." Link paid attention to the silence around them; all of the Kokiri went back to their houses. They were not intimidated by Link instead they preferred not to listen what he could say to their sage. "I am going on a quest for Sendrh Uchia"

Sariah made not a sound, as she stood motionless opening her door, she was going to get something to drink. An eerie silence prevailed, not a sound made. She had even stopped breathing.

"You say nothing?" Link finally asked.

"I have never heard you use those words, yet I know exactly to which place you're referring." Her voice and hands trembled.

"Is that all you have to say?"

"What could I say?" Sariah turned and with watery eyes she pleaded. "In such case I were talking to someone else I would say: it's not amusing. But I know you cannot talk amusingly, rather you are serious about it."

"What do you know? Is what I am asking"

"Why do you ask?" Sariah hurried inside her house and Link followed closely. He crouched to go inside the house and inside he stood up almost full body. "I am not learned in such matters."

"You are the oldest sage and the second most powerful. You cannot tell me you know nothing."

"You shall be disappointed then, for I know nothing." Link moved fast, grabbed Sariah by the arm, and pulled her close to him.

"Tell me"

Sariah could not believe what she was witnessing, Link had gone mad, she thought. "stop" she said softly. "You're hurting me" Link let her loose.

She started to sob and of course, Link was not moved by it in the slightest. He awaited her answer. Sariah rubbed her arm for it still hurt. "What I know is that you cannot go there"

"Tell me now!" Link demanded in great voice that shook his friend with fear. After sobbing some more she finally confessed what she knew.

"Rauru once told me" she spoke slowly. "That the Sacred Realm had an opposite side. He said that it held darkness. That it followed the same laws but in a different manner. The sacred realm is light, it has an entrance and a key, Sendrh Uchia does not. The temple of time marks the entrance and people abide by it. Sendrh Uchia has to be solitary, unmarked by man and where he cannot set foot." She stopped to drink water. "I remember he mentioned in his own manner of speech: Before is after and one is a half. Clarity cannot be seen. Darkness is white"

Link sat mouthing the words Sariah laid before him as she sobbed for the last time.

She dried her tears with her sleeve and then she poured herself more of the water she tried to have before; as she drank, she could hear Link's teeth grind. That had been a habit since he was a child living in that very forest.

"Why did Rauru tell you this?" he asked without looking.

Sariah laid down her beaker and cleared her throat. She felt the knot undoing itself inside her neck.

"When Gannon escaped, we listed places where he would hide."

"And you told me nothing?"

"There is nothing to say. Does that mean anything to you? We pondered it for many days, years if we find not the answer next month. Those words from Rauru were an echo, distant and distorted from the elders. Those who knew the truth about that dreadful place left no warning about its whereabouts. I say those words still without understanding them."

"I must go" Link went for the door. "Vash ek sworelo, Sariah" which interpreted is: thank you for your help, Sariah.

Eventually after Link left the house, she ran to open the door and yell at him from the frame.

"You shall never find it!" her childish voice deepened as it bounced through the meadow. "I pray you never find it. For if you find it, you find your grave! Not a resting place but a space among those not living, the undead! Where I can't follow! Is that your wish? To be without memory of your neither glory nor courage?" and panting she concluded. "My powers will not be of avail if you fall! Nor her powers!"

Link could not look back or take heed of those words. As having no feelings, Sariah's sorrow was meaningless, her words in vain were cast out into the air as pebbles into the sea where they would fall into the bottom and drown under the sands, eternal sands.

Before life was created, before the goddesses organized the materials, time had a space before time. During the dark ages before their love, wisdom and fire, nothing was of importance for nothing was. Not even hope. When having nothing, the goddesses created everything. Now as Link left for the castle, he remembered these wise words from the book of endurance and felt not hope but foresaw a glimpse of defeat.

"I have not a gift" he thought. "I might be wrong".

The words of the sages were of no immediate use; then again Link did not think it would be a simple task. He rode Epona back to the castle and alone he reviewed the new maps from Master Mirodu himself.

Men have not set foot in so many places, the world as enormous as it is has also many forgotten, dreadful and forbidden corners where even the bravest dare not to venture.

Some of the sketches that Link reviewed were made from a distance, the scouts would not explore beyond the confidence of existent trails. Darkness is white, that riddle said. However only an echo, the full riddle (assuming it was a riddle) could hardly represent a lead unto the dark dominion. Again the sketches were the places he knew; again the sketches were nothing, worthless even for the paper. No value at this moment or ever again, they had. His correspondence with general Fallder, the preparations with Lord Zorili, Master Mirodou's efforts, they were all in vain. The same had they done nothing.

And Sariah's resolution to oppose... she had never been more useless.

A wall, that's what Link faced in his attempt to kill the evil king. It was not defeat but blockades that prevented his victory. Not smitten to the ground but cast away distantly, he found himself.

Calmly, Link took the maps, crushed them together, threw them to the fireplace and with a flick of his finger ignited them into a blaze of orange fire and thin black smoke.

"That is called disappointment" he turned around and saw Impa sitting on the floor in the far corner.

"It's called a waste"

"I didn't know you could feel that" Impa stood up and approached Link.

"These papers are of no use to me and the princess cannot read ashes"

"Did you know I was here?"

Link nodded but did not look at Impa; her smile had nothing to do with the situation, it merely is her regular face.

Impa turned towards the small fire without words. She drew her sword to admire it. Never tired to appreciate the work of the royal smiths, her sword was created especially for her and her smaller hands. If a mother or a housewife, Impa would have had gentle hands the ones that express love, serenity or calmness inward and outward. Yet she was selected to protect, to serve, to fight and obey. Her hands as well as her weapon were both fit for the knife-work.

"You went to the forest" Link did not answer. "You asked Sariah about that place. What is it that you call it?"

"Sendrh Uchia"

"Yes, it means something about darkness" she continued with her sword drawn and swinging it around in a playful manner. "If you want to know about it, you should ask Rauru. He is by far the wisest of all of us. Also, he dwells in the temple of light which is only a step before the sacred realm."

Link did not answer, not being sure if Impa knew that no one could communicate with him unless summoned before his presence.

He wanted that woman away; he seemed to think things better when alone. What used to be a deficiency became regularity over the years turned to happen constantly until finally to this day is a necessity. His concentration suffered when observed and pressured for an answer; the very heartbeats of another person could bring Link out of his thoughts.

"There is a way to talk to Rauru" Impa returned her sword to the sheath. Link turned to see her. "Kaepora Gaebora, he can communicate with him."

"How do you know this?"

"You need to listen to the grass talk; it has endless stories and songs for the travellers and hermits. The very earth composed of the rocks and fresh weeds have witnessed everything below the sun, they are my brothers and hold no secrets to me."

"That is your gift, not mine. That owl, I have not seen him in years."

"But there is a way to find him. I say find him, yet you will not encounter him at will for he is not seen unless he wants it. And you cannot call for him for he answers no one. If you seek his wisdom he shall come to you. He soars in a straight line between good and evil nevertheless he offers his counsel to anyone."

"How does he counsel? You said he is between good and evil. Would he help me?"

"Help you?" Impa crossed her arms. "Do you suppose that words are of use? He was once a Sage and he chose to be exiled from any kind of quest. This decision cost him to be the enormous owl he is now. He would counsel the evil king if the king permitted this. Do not mistake self-praise with aid"

"How can I seek his counsel?" he asked wishing to end the conversation at once.

"Deep in your heart, if you have one; know this: that you cannot do this alone. Humble yourself and become open yourself to him. In simple words: feed his pride."

Link left the room after hearing those words. Impa knew that he would do that. Without fear he was not, he feared people. Link chose to stay away from everyone, she thought, because fraternizing was very complicated for him, because he feared everything he did not understand.

Link knew what those words meant and did not like it. He needed to believe his quest needed no more aid than his delegated responsibilities. But he needed to learn about the evil lair otherwise his efforts would be in vain and the kingdom defeated.

Then after walking, he remembered a fragment from the puzzle Sariah told him. One is a half, its first line said. One is part or more, or in other words: what might seem as one thing it actually is part of something bigger. The puzzle broke into meaning as he remembered the other words: before is after; that is the meaning of the circle, the eternal process of change, everything is attached to this pattern. It was simply said in a confusing way.

The last sentence: clarity cannot be seen, darkness is white… what could that mean? Link felt the meaning closer than it seemed. He knew in an effort that it was related to the first words.

Suddenly, with a memory, it was all clear. The memory was just instants ago when Impa held her sword. Link remembered that she gained that habit from the sword smith that created that sword. He said that the flaws in a blade, the worst ones are the ones that cannot be seen for they are deep and go without care. Her habit was to stare the perfect blade to her and the faults she could not see. Clarity cannot be seen because to see you need to see clearly. The same way you cannot see glass because glass is transparent. The same way fault cannot be seen to the untrained eye because they represent nothing unusual. To notice something it has to draw attention and be out of place. After knowing that, the rest was simple: darkness is white. Before is after, black is white; it is the same meaning. Before and after, black and white; for one to exist it needs the other one, before one is the other, yet they have the same purpose: to balance in order to see. Link once fought in a room full of light that blinded him. He could not see, just as in darkness.

"That is the meaning of the puzzle" Link thought. "It reveals not the location but the essence and necessities of it." Then looking out the window he deciphered the rest. "not with the aid of the puzzle alone have I found the location, but through the philosophy and knowledge of this world." He thought as he leaned towards the window that saw directly into the garden. There he saw the turquoise orchids and before them the torches flared the much-needed heat. Before is after. The opposing sides are not divided by a gap even if this is of the shortest distance; rather they are side by side. Before darkness there is light, and where life began is the entrance to where life ends. Sendrh Uchia had an entrance at the shores of Paltitren, the place of the circle of eternal beams where is said life begun.

He needed a boat to go there, he went to where a quill and wrote a message to Lord Anchorage and his fleet: prepare a ship to sail to Paltitren. He folded such message and left it for the courier. Then another thought: the fate of the kingdom lay within his hands and now it was time for the right or wrong decision. A decision that would bring victory or defeat. He sat and wrote a letter for General Fallder; there he left the instruction of what to do.

"Let us hope I did the right thing" Link thought.

He called for that courier, gave both messages with the order that one should be handed personally to General Fallder and the other one should be sent to the bay through the resonant arrowhead. Several inventors who saw the effectiveness of bow and arrow as communication artefacts had developed this sort of communication. The cross bow, was at the highest tower. From tower an arrow thicker than a bundle of spears is launched, it reaches a distant and lonely patch, there one soldier launches that same arrow towards a greater distance, that way it reaches four more points until it finally it's plunged in the soil for the soldiers to read the content of the arrow. The arrow is levelled and holed around so it resists flanking wind. The courier left for tower and then for his horse.

Link sat down on his chair and began playing the ocarina; this had the power to communicate with her. "Sariah…" Link whispered in his mind "I have found the meaning.

"No you couldn't have"

"Yes, I took me no time and little effort, for that I presume you have known the meaning all this time"

"Yes, in a way" Link heard the voice inside the head. "how did you unveil the secret?"

"Those laws apply to weapons and battle."

"Do you know how to find it?"

"Aye. All your lies cannot keep me from my destiny."

Sariah asked no more, she had heard enough; suffice to say she wanted to hear nothing more but a distress call, yet he continued. "You believe the puzzle unveils the location directly, that is a mistake. What is needed after unlocking the truth is searching the place with your own experience. You know not the location for you have never left the kingdom."

He ceased his song and thus ended communications. "All the maps you find cannot tell you about the circle of eternal beams for only those who have seen them know about them. You know nothing of this world. The wisdom of the sages has failed." he said to himself.

Link thought for a while what to do next for his parting is nigh, he needed to make preparations and again he thought of the princess and remembered the counsel Zelda gave him once. For that reason he went to the throne to speak to her.

During the sunset Zelda would stay at the throne to hear the petitions of the commoners, this she do so they could have time for their chores and plead afterwards.

The last petitioner had gone and she was ready to go to the dinning room that is when she saw Link. She felt glad of heart and requested to be left alone.

"Link…" she stood, he bowed, and they kissed.

He had other things on his mind but now given the moment he wanted to go with it.

"I was about to dine, would you care to join me?" Zelda asked smiling with her arms around him.

"Yes" That was his heart speaking and not his stomach.

They went to eat yet Link had little to eat for he particularly enjoyed Zelda's company rather than the food. During dinner, the princess often held Link's bare hand as she made an occasional comment about this and that, one story from the past or one plan for the future. After the last course of meal had been taken away she stared at the window that had the stained glass in a pale yellow, now during the night it seemed almost black. "I would suppose that tonight is one of those nights of which you are so fond. Shall we see it?" Holding hands they left for a walk under the stars without a moon. But the wind blew; the trees murmured jealousy of the walking and a wolf howled in the plains of the distance. It was similar to the night of their first kiss. It meant so much to them. It divided before and after it was a border of done and undone, thoughts and actions, truth and lie.

"I enjoy these moments, and we seldom have them."

"Zelda, I need to tell you something…" Link seemed to have hesitated yet he merely forgot the words. With an effort he remembered the man-speech word for: lavania. Meaning important or serious. "There is something important you must know. I am leaving for I am needed."

Zelda stared at Link yet her mouth moved not. It would appear she did not hear him but that was not the case. She was holding a memory of the way he looked that evening, this so she could remember him during the heavy-burdened days and lonely nights.

"You say nothing?" Link inquired.

"Not now. I sense this is no time to argue. For that I am without words. Neither shall I shed tears." she drew closer to him.

"That is good" he did the same.

They kissed again but before Link could separate, Zelda held him tightly and whispered.

"I wish to hear you say you love me"

"It would be meaningless" was his answer but for his surprise those words did not hurt her.

"Yes, I know. Now I think of it, it doesn't matter. Nevertheless I don't like it I am joyful for you stayed with me this night. I sense you love me even when you can't say it. Rather I wish to hear it because you can understand it than for my own satisfaction. "

One day he will understand, Zelda was sure. They parted to their different ways with the thought of each other close to them. The quiet and kind breeze brought the aroma of rose oils. Even the soldiers on guard could smell it. The air was not violent; rather it was swift and diligent as though it had a task to perform.

Link went for his quarters for some rest before the wearying travel ahead of him. Before doing so, he cleansed his face, took off his shirt and tunic and rubbed a soaked cloth against his tired, scarred skin. He took off his tilted-back pointy hat and undid his braid; he took the cloth and poured water on his head.

Suddenly the door opened and Zelda appeared before him. She had something to say instead of ordering him. Somehow she could not grasp it, even her mind stammered. Link stood by the basin waiting for the princess to say what she had in mind. But no words came at that moment; only she closed the door behind her, walked to Link's arms and became lost in them.

He received her with the very same gladness he had just discovered. Their thoughts became actions; their actions turned into passion. They both gasped from the stumble with each other, of their mutual desire. Both of them were drawn into bed and continued exploring while panting with the heat of their hearts. They did lie in bed for the time being and thanked time for it. Several occasions did Zelda express herself sweetly, elegantly and briefly. Link listened without intervention. "Yes, I love you." She whispered to herself with her lover's lips around her own. Embracing her love, and for the first time freed from her fears and from what tomorrow could bring. Madness, she called it nevertheless the most beautiful illusion and the closest to reality as there ever was. Verily, the moment expanded to become the day and the very hours of forever. Nothing became everything.

On the other hand, for Link it was not the freeing from anything for he never knew heartbreak, fear, illusion, or sadness, rather that night became one thing. That night was something for him, something with meaning, feelings became necessary, he for the first time could foresee that bridge Zelda spoke of before. He felt that cycle of sharing and understanding where he took an active part. That woman was not the princess anymore, nor his master. She became something else, which was not to the kingdom, but only to him: she was for his own.

It wasn't until several hours later that Link left his bed with Zelda sleeping soundly in it, covered only in the white sheets freshly placed that morning. He took his clothes on, single-braided his hair and left for the stable.

Link found Epona sleeping and required only a whisper to have her up and about. "Come with me to this last quest." He chaired his horse and left for the docks at bay knowing that Lord Anchorage would have a many things to do. He left for the more secret pass way he reserved for escaping routes. This he did it so that no one would see him. To not disrupt the sleep of the people and especially would not open the city gates. He pressed forward with a faster gallop with each stride from the Hyrule field and along the sweet smell of his love accompanying him. The aroma of last night and the one of an hour earlier. Even at the drawn of morning it stayed with him.