A soft twilight glow had descended upon the Sohma estate by the time Yuki neared small,
bard window set high in a white-washed wall. Apprehension made his hart beat fast in his tight chest; Akito was somewhere in the estate, no reason he shouldn't just be walking by this place.

God, he whished he was some place else. But deep in his hart, he knew that he had no choice. A hole month of utter, painful confusion had compelled him to come hear first to drop a letter (and god that letter had been hell to write) under pretence of talking to Kagura (which had not gone well), and now hear again. Sometimes, he wish he could shut down his emotions, they made life so much harder. So much more painful.

He had initially intended, when he planed this out with nervous misgivings, to be long gone from hear by now. It had bean simple, the poor, confused rat had thought. He was due for an examination by Hatori, so he anticipated to go there, briefly, then come hear, and be out in the space of an hour. It had not gone to plan.

At first Hatori had bean delayed, seeing to Akito. A silent anger had stirred within him at this news, that the demonic head was to ruin this as well as... but then, he couldn't remember what he had ruined. Not really, not if he was honist with himself. So Yuki had wanted with Haru and Momiji, talking, playing cards; he had noticed that Momiji had become increasingly attached to Haru since Kyo was taken.

When finally Hatori had returned and examined him he had hoped to be off quickly. But the doctor had mention, almost as a warning, that Akito had taken it into his twisted mind to go walking in the ground this evening. This had terrified him, he had a personal dread of the man. He wanted to speak to Kyo, to know what the hell was going on with them, but fear compelled him to accept Haru's invitation to stay for a little while longer. Just a little longer.

It had taken Momiji's request that he stay for diner as well to sway him to leave.
"I'd best get back. I promised Tohru I'd be there when diner was ready." He had lied, by way of excuse.

"Of cause." Momiji had replied. "She must be finding it hard, with Kyo gone." Yuki had noticed the way that the rabbit had drawn nearer to his cozen as he said that. Had he always upheld such physical closeness to Haru? Had he missed this before, or was this new? He couldn't be sure. He'd never really paid attention to anyone. Except Tohru and Kyo, of cause. No, no just Tohru. Surelly just Tohru.

And so now he found himself hear, closing in on Kyo's window. Last time he'd come in the early morning, completely on a whim, righting the letter on the way, he couldn't find the courage to speak to him. It had taken him hours to find it, then. Now he had memorised the path, he trod it quickly, desperately.

He glanced quickly around. There... at the foot of the wall. I picked it up: it was a collection a papers. The first one was- he checked again. Yes, it was the letter he had written Kyo. It was crumpled, the ink was smuged. Maybe they where tearstains. Maybe not Had he rejected it? But, ihe/i was the one that had started this, with the note as he had left...

The second paper was the envelope. A quick not was scrolled over it:

iYuki, Akito comes hear occasionally, I can't risk him finding this. I really do want to keep it, but if that basted finds it- you know what'll happen. You should go quickly: reed this at home.
-Kyo/i

He listen carefully. He could almost- he thought he caught Akito's voice on the wind.

Yuki left, quickly, almost frantically, leaving behind only a fading, hazy light, a few fallen tears and the sound of malicious laughed from the bared window.

---

"Oh, hello Yuki." Tohru bubbled as he stepped through the door. Shigure smirked; ever since Kyo had bean confined he seamed to be expecting Yuki and Tohru to start something. "Have you eaten already? Diner wont be ready for at least half an hour, so I hope you're not too hungry. Ou! How was you're check-up? is you're asthma-"

He forces a smile and brought his hand to her shoulder as he passed. "Half and hoer is good timing. And I'm fine." iI'm not I'm not I'm not/i screamed in his mind. i I don't understand, oh GOD I don't understand at all! Someone please explain/i He quickly slipped upstairs, ignoring Shigure looked about ready to make an indecent comment, and went to his room, shore to turn the catch against intrusion.

Sitting on his bead, the very confused rat handled the envelope. This was getting weird. A few long weeks ago, it had all bean so simple. He hated Kyo, Kyo hated him. Kyo picked fights because of some overblown complex, Yuki tolerated it and beat him each time. No hided hazards, no complex emotional traps. Well, there had bean the few odd moments. The first time they had fort in front of Tohru, spinning past his adversary, he'd felt an unbearable impulse to kiss the stupid cat. Of cause he hadn't acted on it, and had then kicked the boy into the yard in retaliation, but it had bean close... (1)

He could go back to that. It would be so easy just to throw away the envelope, never think of it, never return to Kyo, he'd never have to face him... But then, what would Kyo think?
That he had bean played like a fool by Yuki, or worse, that Akito had somehow orcastrated the hole scenario, that really he was just some dammed rat laky to a dark god. Now, Yuki was afraid of Akito, respected his power, did what he said, more from fear than any other motive,
but he would be damned if someone, anyone, was going to think he would betray some one he cared for-

iOh my god. Did I just think that? Surly he's just an annoying pest. Surely I don't care... oh god I don't understand/i

But he did, and he know it. And so there was only one thing he could do. Find out what the hell had bean going on, what had bean forced from his memories, and quite how close the cat and rat had become, and just how angry he had a right to be.

He opened the envelope.

(1) really, look in chapter 2 (p65 in think). It looks like Yuki is going to kiss him when they fight.