FMA BLOOPERS
CHAPTER 2
agent000 Your wish has been granted!
BLOOPER 6:
I do not take credit for blooper 6!
Roy, Ed,Al, and the rest of his subordinates (excluding Havoc & Fury) are watching lieutenant Ross flirting with a man with a golden beard and hair.
"Huh, hey brother that guy looks familiar?" says Al.
Al sees that is not even near him but charging towards the flirting figure with unimaginable rage. Ed then punches the manly figure with his metal fist knocking him to the ground.
"Ah shit! What the hell is your problem, Ed? I raised you better than that!" Yells Hohemheim.
"Uhh, "dad" you're messing up the script you're just supposed to take the punch you punk!"says Ed
"You know what, I can't work under these conditions; this short dwarf is really pissing me off!"
Roy then slides into the scene with his hands in his sleeves and looking dark and mysterious.
"Hohemheim, use the force." says Roy.
"The force?" questions Hohemheim.
"The FORCE." says Roy.
Hohemheim then pulls off his belt from around his waist AND says "THE FORCE!"
"W-wait hold on what ARE you doing! You can't do that you're an actor not my real daaaaaaaaaaaaaaad!"
Hohemheim then starts to beat the hell out of Ed, while he's screaming in pain Roy is laughing hysterically as he watches on the side with a bucket of popcorn.
Al then runs off set as Hohemheim chases after him full of blind fury.
"Wait please I didn't do any thing! Nooooooooooooooooooooo!" screams Al.
"Take off your head Alphonse!" demands Hohemheim.
Al then takes it off full of fear and Hohemheim climbs inside and focuses on Al's blood seal.
Hohemheim then beats Al's blood seal screaming, "How dare you let your stupid, bad acting brother touch my beautiful face you stupid f#ck!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAH! MY SOUL IT BURNS WITH THE GREAT INTENSITY OF A THOUSAND SUNS!"
"Oh God give me strength," the director desperately prays.
BLOOPER 7:
"Brother, if homunculus are made from a failed transmutation that means-" Al looked at Ed, but saw he was doing something else instead of playing his part "Brother what are you doing?"
Ed ignored him, "Sooooooooooo Trisha's your name huh?"
"Yes it is" giggled Trisha, "but right now my name is 'Sloth'".
"Oh no baby, I get it, I get it. 'Sloth' my name is 'Ed' lets make a baby and name him 'sled'" Ed flirted
"Brother that's just wrong!".
"Shut up! And stop calling me brother your not even my real brother and she's not our real mother!"
"I know that! Its just your 15 and she's what? 45!".
"For the last damn time! I'm 25! I just have a 15 year old body, damn! She's not 45 she's actually 30 years old so back off!" Sloth looked at Ed and slipped him her phone number "call me" she whispered then turned and walked away.
"HELL YES. I'M GETTIN ME SOME ASS, I'M GETTIN ME SOME ASS, I'M GETTING ME SOME ASS!" Ed sung.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING EDWARD?" yelled Lust.
"Shit". Ed froze
"Are flirtin with other women?" accused Lust
"Of course not baby you know me it's your baby boo, Edward" he rebuttals smoothly, "and your my only green beautiful flower".
"Alright"smiled Lust "you'll be home tonight right, baby?".
"I'm going to be kinda late, so I'll see you in the morning".
"Alright" sighed Lust.
BLOOPER 8:
Envy and Ed are facing off with each other in Laboratory Five; Envy was winning.
"BE STILL!" yelled Ed, but Envy kept dodging him.
"Man f#ck this!" he screamed, Ed lodged his foot right between Envy's leg
"AWWW F#CK!" yelled Envy "YOU KICKED ME IN MY GOT DAMN B#LLS!" Envy falls to his knees. "YOU PIECE OF RAT SHIT! I'LL KILL YOU!"
"You have nuts?" Ed inquired, genuinely confused at this "new" discovery.
"Got damn it, Ed! I've told you already I'm a guy! We've been working together for what, two years!" Envy screamed, curling up into a ball on the floor.
"Calm down Envy, lets go to the next scene then," sighed the director.
"NO! We're going to do this scene again! Just give me some ice and I'll be ready in ten minutes" says Envy, as he squirms away on his stomach.
TAKE TWO
Envy was very stealth ready to charge at Edward "I'm getting' my revenge" sneered Envy. Edward was scared out of his mind, as soon as the director sad 'action' he started to run the opposite direction.
"CUT! JESUS! CUT!" Screamed the director, fed up.
"where in the hell are you going SHORT ASS!" taunted Envy. He flipped and landed in front of Ed.
"oh shi-".
Envy lifted his foot in the back as far as possible and kicked Edward between the legs, sending him flying in to the stages background. Ed fell on his back Red-faced, biting his lip, and his hands latched in between his legs. The pain was so unbearable that his face was stuck and all you could hear was "uuuh...uhhh"
"If you two are going to keep doing this we're going to find replacement actors".
"NO!" Envy yelled.
"uuuhhhhh" Ed protested.
BLOOPER 9:
"You did it brother!You got my old body back!" yelled Al happily.
"Yeah! bout damn time too! If this didn't work I was going to give-...oh damn"
"Whats wrong Ed, what happ-...WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED!"
"ummmm"
"Why am I in a womens body? Ed you better fix this; You did the transmutation wrong!"
"Well you gotta admit that body does make you look sexy. Well, I like the the body at least" Ed did a 180 degrees tilt with his head.
"Yeah this body does have a good set of racks on it doesn-...STOP TRYING TO DISRACT ME!"
"I wasn't"
"Fix me now, Edward!"
"You know" Ed did this hiss of disappointment,"Actually, its my lunch break slash coffee break, so I'll change you back later"
"No! Comeback here! UGHH! YOU KNOW THAT COFFEE YOU DRANK THIS MORNING? YEA, THAT WASN'T CREAM!" he yelled.
BlOOPER 10:
Ed is facing off with Scar "Die state alchemist!" yelled Scar, he came charging.
"Not if I can help it!" Ed smirked angrily; he clapped his hands together and slammed them on the ground.
"darn it!" yelled Scar. A pipeline had raised up from under the city "It's time to get soaked and wet!" screamed Ed, he clapped his hands once more and water started to gush out, hitting scar dramatically.
Scar fell to the ground, and looked at his arm with the markings on it "Damn they said this tattoo wasn't washable!"
