It was her birthday for God's sake. She was supposed to be happy. So why did none of this seem to hold any meaning?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ginny smiled appropriately after each gift, squealing as Fred and George's snake in a can present went off (they had recently been inspired by their father's love of Muggles), and ahh-ing at the lovely diamond studs her mother gave her. Blushing as expected when her mother sniffled at how her little girl was 18 and had been a "real, full wizard for a whole year! Oh heavens!" But once the presents were opened and the cake devoured she pled fatigue and left the happiness of the den that seemed so unfamiliar to Ginny.
Once in her room Ginny let the last of the meaningless conversations of the afternoon roll out of her head. She tired to sleep, but knew it would never come. She could only sleep when she knew he was safe, the one whose name she dare not even think, knowing it would break her down to tears.
It is my birthday, she thought, he should have at least sent some word that he was alive even if he couldn't have come. But she knew it was pointless to dream, Harry hadn't had any contact with the family since the Order found out Voldemort had gotten some of Harry's hair and could now use it at his whim in a Polyjuice potion. And that was almost two years ago
Harry, oh no, she had thought of him, why us? It's not fair. It felt like yesterday that he was lying next to her in bed, telling her how he had to go. No amount of pleading could make him take her with him.
"Gin, you know I can't."
"Why should the rest of the world get to fall in love when you make it safe. But you have to suffer alone!" He had taken her left hand, kissing the ring that would have been full of joy.
"Gin, you know why…"
"That doesn't make it any better" She had barely withheld a heart-wrenching sob, and sat up turning from him.
He had folded her into his arms, stroking her hair as she quietly cried into his shoulder, as sure as always that God had make it so she would fit perfectly on Harry's shoulder.
"Ginny…" She couldn't look at him. " Please, Gin, there's something else I need you to do for me." Startled she had looked into his eyes, those green eyes that always reminded her of a spring that she had hoped would hold their wedding.
"This is..its unfair of me..Gin…" Harry sighed and put his head in his hands.
Ginny's eyes had widened to an inhuman amount
" Whatever you do, you can't ask me to move on Harry." Her voice full of the resolve that Harry always thought was amazing.
"Never" Was his absolute answer. "But…" he looked away again clearly upset by whatever he had to tell her.
Softly he had said, " Gin, I need to ask you to not wear your engagement ring."
Taken a back, she grasped the ring and sat heavily onto the bed.
" Take it off? Harry we can still get married after the war, I mean no one even knows about it yet."
Harry sighed and ran his fingers through his hair in his hereditary habit.
"I'm just worried that if Voldemort finds out just how close we are…he'll try to kill you." Stubbornly she crossed her arms.
" Don't you go and try to make this into a Voldemort's gonna kill you conversation"
" Ginny please…" Harry stood up and started pacing the room; Ginny could still remember how shocked she had been to see the tears starting to well up in his eyes before he had hastily wiped them.
She went over to him and, for once, took him in her arms.
"You're really scared aren't you?" she murmured softly.
" I'm not scared of dying, or getting hurt." He said with a strange look in his eyes " but if you died before I killed Voldemort or after for that matter…I don't think I could go on with the search, and then what would happen?"
Realizing the severity of this, and how deeply he loved her, even more then she had ever hoped he could, Ginny kissed him softly, knowing full well this could be one of the last times she would ever kiss him for a long time. Then she slid the beautiful diamond ring off her finger and held it out for Harry to take.
Much to her surprise he closed her fingers around it.
" I don't want you to give it back, I just wanted you to take it off until I get back." He looked deeply into her eyes, "and I will come back, I swear it to you."
And as unrealistic as they both knew it was Ginny trusted him to hold his word…
Lying in her bed Ginny realized what a fool she had been, true Harry loved her, but if he had had to leave back then why should he be able to come back now.
Suddenly, hearing footsteps approaching the door, Ginny threw herself under the covers and put her back to the door, faking sleep.
" Oh Molly, she looks so peaceful when she sleeps." Ginny could hear her father sighing proudly.
" When she sleeps yes," replied her mother " but I can tell she still is always thinking of Harry, no matter how much she denies it."
Ginny swore she could hear her dad nodding in his funny way as he said, " She may be thinking about him but I think she's starting to get over him"
Ginny knew her mum didn't believe that for a second but rather then explain her motherly intuition she simply hmmm-ed agreeably.
Once Ginny was sure they had left she sat back up and pulled off the covers. Time for my birthday present to me, she thought bitterly as she headed over to her jewelry box. Once a year (she had decided it would be on her birthday) she allowed herself to wear the ring for an hour, planning a wedding she thought would never come, and just allowing herself to wallow in the type of self pity she found disgusting when publicly displayed.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Once her self-allotted pity time was over, Ginny carefully hid her joy in the ring box she spelled to open for no one but herself or Harry. Then returned to her lonely bed and fell into her fitful dreams or nightmares that one way or another, always resulted in Harry's death.
Later that night, she had a dream that, for the first time since Harry left, didn't involve his death. She dreamt that he was sitting next to her on a beach, not talking, just sitting there stroking her hair. When she woke up to find herself staring at an empty wall that held only the reflection of the moonlight she nearly wept again. Why am I doomed to a life of unhappiness? Its not right…
As she started to roll over to fall back into another fitful dream sequence, Ginny heard a sound that she had associated with bells ringing their joy.
" Ginny?" She gasped at the prospect of who was there. Hoping it was him, but wary enough of the world they lived in, Ginny whipped out her wand and pointed it at the speaking voice.
"Harry?" She said timidly, not wanting her moment of happiness to die like her dream only moments ago.
" It's me…I came back." As much as Ginny knew it was him (she always knew she would be able to tell him a part from a fake, Polyjuice Harry) she still needed proof.
" I need you to prove it" Even in the dark she could she him frowning that little frown he did when he was trying to work out a problem.
"How?" he asked, unsure of what to do next.
Ginny went to her bureau, using all her willpower not to run over there just to prove it faster and be able to take Harry in her arms, and found the jewelry box. Slowly she turned, suddenly shy. What if all he's done has changed him? He could think I was just a silly little girl with no sense of what the world is truly like. A bit frantic she quickly looked at him. But he didn't catch her eye, he was looking around and smiling, staring absently at the spot on the wall where they had made an indent when Ginny had accidentally kicked out against the wall while they were snogging, and then to the terrible painting he had done when he was looking for a new hobby. She then realized how stupid that thought was, nothing could change their love. She walked over to the bed and sat down next to him, forcing herself not to throw herself onto him just yet.
Handing him the box she said, "Can you open this?" Puzzled he took the box and looked at it, clearly thinking this was a test of some sort. Not knowing where else to start, he just tried to lift the lid…and then it sprung open.
Releasing a breath Ginny had not known she was holding. She pried the box from Harry's hand.
"Now I know you're my Harry." Looking him straight in the eyes for the first time since he arrived, Ginny saw the old passion, the same passion they had when he left. Not being able to wait any longer she put aside the box and threw herself to him, kissing the lips she could never forget. Surprised for a moment, Harry quickly threw himself into a kiss that neither wanted to end for fear the other would disappear.
Gasping for breath Ginny pulled back after a minute only to bring Harry back to her after a quick moments rest. Not forgetting anything about Ginny, Harry kissed her neck, then sucked on the spot he knew was her greatest weakness. Sharply inhaling, Ginny reveled in the moment.
After another minute of passionate, pent up kisses, the two parted so they could talk before getting to the full remembering of each other.
Not knowing what to ask first, Ginny sat just looking at Harry for a while, he clearly glad to do the same.
Suddenly Ginny remembered what had kept them apart. Eyes widened she asked, "Is Voldemort dead?"
Shaking his head sadly Harry replied " Not yet, but soon he will be" meeting Ginny's eyes again he said, "I destroyed the sixth Horcrux. Voldemort knows this and he knows I'm strong enough now to kill him, so he went into hiding." Harry snorted, "not very effectively though because I have always known exactly where he is since he left..."
" So that's why the number of killings has got down." Ginny murmured, making the connection from what used to seem like a calm before the storm.
Harry nodded " …and tomorrow the Daily Profit will have a story on the front page of how 12 Death Eaters were caught."
Ginny's eyes welled up with tears "Does this mean you can come back until you go to fight Voldemort?" Taking her hands Harry shook his head.
" I'm not even supposed to be here…" Ginny's smile drooped a bit.
"Then why did you risk it?"
Still holding her hands, Harry squeezed them.
" I came back for two reasons. But I need you to promise to hear me out fully…ok?" Wary but trusting Ginny nodded.
" Alright, you know that I'm gonna go fight Voldemort soon." Again Ginny nodded, "and I am strong enough to kill him, but just barely." Seeing Ginny's mouth open to voice what would be a predictable protest, but Harry plowed on.
" I know…I could wait until I am stronger, but we think he is planning a massive amount of Muggle murdering that will all happen on the same day so we won't be able to stop them, but if I kill him first the Death Eaters won't know what to do and we will be able to stop them then…" Harry faltered there and looked around the room, his eyes settling on the ring box.
The fears Ginny had had earlier came rushing back. Oh no! She thought he's going to ask for the ring back…but the sensible voice in her head said then why was he snogging you like he would die if he stopped? Shaking the Angel/Devil voices from her mind she listened to the only voice that mattered to her, Harry's.
"…when I gave this to you?" Ginny looked up confused at the question she had missed.
"Sorry, what?" Harry's eyes laughed, knowing full well she had being arguing with herself as she did before he left.
" I was asking if you remembered how nervous I was when I gave this to you." Ginny smiled, recalling how he had gotten all worked up to say something and then blurted out "Bathroom" and practically flew away. When he came back, though, he had a determined look in his eye and he didn't even pause before kneeling, taking her small hand in his strong, sure ones and asking her to marry him.
Ginny was only jolted out of her memories when Harry knelt before her and took her right hand, the same look in his eyes.
" Ginevra Wesley," pausing while they both chuckled at Ginny's name. Starting again, Harry dropped all the formalities.
" Gin, I know I already did this but I want to do it again. Ginny, there's no poem I can recite, or anything I can really say about how much I love you, there are no words for it. All I can say is look into my eyes to see the love I would show you for the rest of our life together if you were my wife." But Ginny didn't need to even look, she already knew.
So quietly, almost afraid Harry would disappear if she spoke to loud she said "Yes Harry."
The passion he had for Ginerva Weasley, no, Ginny Potter, burning in his eyes. Harry quietly slipped the ring onto Ginny's right hand.
Laughing Ginny started to remove the ring "Harry darling, I think you have been away from the world for too long, the ring goes on my left hand." But Harry stopped her.
Speaking very seriously "That's the thing. I'd like you to wear it on your other hand until… if… I come back." Ginny's brow furrowed, confused.
" But I thought you wanted everyone to know, that's why you came back for a day."
"Gin, I can't stay until tomorrow, I have to leave here in a few hours…I might die fighting Voldemort but I wanted you to know where I was going and that I never ever forgot you." Pausing, Harry took a deep breath. Knowing this was just as hard for him as it was for her Ginny didn't try to speak.
" If I die, you can wear this ring on your right hand or not at all, but I want you to know that if you find love don't be afraid to take it, I just want you to be happy. And then no one will ever have to know that we were to be married. And if I come back fine…well you can forget this conversation and we'll announce the engagement to everyone we meet," laughing Harry finished, "even the random Muggles we meet on the street."
Smiling a watery smile at Harry's very, very bad attempt at humour, Ginny kissed Harry's hands and only said "I understand."
Harry's eyes showed the surprise that his face managed to conceal. Ginny knew he expected her to fight him on this, saying they should announce it now since he was not going to die. But Ginny had grown up in his two year absence, and she knew this was something out of her control…but she did know that there was something else she that she did have control over.
Sliding closer to Harry and putting her head on his shoulder she asked, "Can you stay for another couple of hours?" He nodded, and then thinking she couldn't see him said "Yeah, why?"
Ginny then sat up and looked him straight in the eyes and said, " Because as your future engaged…err… person… err… oh hell, as your future wife. I want to throw you down on this bed and have my way with you for the next two hours. " Smiling Harry picked up his wand and Imperturbabled the room, then muttered the Contraceptive Charm.
Eyeing her suspiciously he said "You better not have learned any new tricks from anyone while I was gone."
Laughing she whispered, "You just don't remember how good I was cause I don't need any other tricks."
The pair giggled like the giddy children they should have been, and then stopped wasting any more of their precious two hours.
