"DYNAMIC ENTRY!"
"You're paying for that door, Maito-San." I said without looking up from my work.
"Ah, Youthful as ever, Kiko!" Gai bellowed. "I am in need of assistance once more, fair maiden!"
I had just gotten Might Gai to leave the shop after dropping off a bolt of green spandex for another custom unitard when I heard their bickering voices coming down the street and filtering through the recently broken door.
"Come on Sasuke! Just come in and meet her. She's really nice. Wait, don't leave Sakura-chan, please? We don't need the teme anyway."
My eyes froze on the spot in the newspaper I was reading, hoping, praying that some miraculous disaster would sway their intended path. I did not need another headache coming in here. Alas, it appeared that not actually believing in the god I was praying to hampered his willingness to bestow mercy on me. That or Jesus didn't exist here, and two seconds after my silent pleas for peace, a pair of arguing children came barreling through the doorway.
"Waa! Sorry, okay he's not a bastard! I said sorry Sakura-chan! Hey whaddya think happened to the door?"
I sighed and lifted the newspaper higher in front of my face, wishing once again for a pair of headphones and the social 'do-not-disturb sign' that they implied. But knowing Naruto, he wouldn't have heeded them even if they did exist.
"See Sakura-chan? This place totally isn't sketch!" Naruto shouted at what must have been the top of his lungs. I flinched minutely, but otherwise tried to stay still in the hopes that they wouldn't notice me.
"Oh, look! There's some more of the candy I got!" Naruto bounded over to the bowl of sweets on the counter, taking a handful. I bit back the urge to snap that those were for customers only- if he'd just leave then he could have it for all I cared. "Here! Try some!" Great, he was offering them to his friend. Looked like I'd have to restock after this if they acted anything like how I remember kids did at Halloween. "They're really, really good, believe it!" Naruto went on.
"Naruto!" The girl shrieked. Ugh, why do kids have such annoying voices? "Put those back! You're supposed to just take one!"
"But they're good!" Naruto whined, speaking around what sounded like a mouthful of candy. "Try some Sakura!"
"I'm on a diet." The girl demurred with a sigh.
Oh thank god. Maybe they'll leave…
"Whatever, your loss." Naruto said. "Anyway, I want you guys to meet the really nice lady who gave me the candy! Heeey Laa-!"
When my newspaper was suddenly pulled down from my face I leveled him with a murderous glare.
"Ack!" Naruto jumped back to a safe distance. "Sh-she looks like Sasuke on a bad day." Naruto shivered.
Sakura's eyes widened. "You're right! They could almost be related!"
"No way! Sasuke is way girlier than Kiko." He denied.
"What!"
While Naruto and Sakura began to argue over the respective femininity of my features compared to their friend, I took the chance to once again erecting a social and visual barrier between myself and the bothersome kids; straightening out the newspaper with a flick of my wrist. I sighed contentedly, relaxing comfortably into the chair and resuming my read. Alas, it was not to be.
"Anyway, that lady glaring at us behind the newspaper is Kiko-none-of-your-business. She wouldn't tell me her family name 'cause she said it was none of her business, so that's what I call her!"
I blinked. He's never once called me that, so unless he talks about me to others, then that is not what he calls me. He probably made that up on the spot to impress his friend.
"Why's her family name none of your business?" The Sakura asked.
"That is also none of your business." I interjected. The girl blinked at me apparently having forgotten my presence entirely and whispered behind her hand, "Sheesh, Naruto. You sure this is the nice lady you were talking about?"
"I may not be nice, but I'm also not deaf." I told her sternly, folding up my paper at last. "And you both are being exceedingly rude."
Needless to say, neither of us seemed to strike a very good first impression with the other, much to Naruto's disappointment. I didn't feel bad. I didn't. It's not may fault they caught me in a bad mood and no one but Naruto can handle my gruff personality. Naruto's puppy dog eyes when I ordered them both out of the store did not affect me. Not one bit.
Note:
I rewrote this chapter waaay too many times.
Deleted scene:
"K-Kiko?" Naruto nervously spoke, "I- I'm sorry for pulling down your newspaper…"
"Hn." I made a sound of acknowledgment. Over the top of the newspaper I saw Naruto and Sakura exchange a look, both glancing at Sasuke before back at each other. Sakura made a shooing motion.
"…a-and, um, sorry for taking so much candy…"
"And?"
Naruto gulped, "And calling you lady…"
"Anything else?" I asked, folding up my paper with resignation.
"Uh, no?" Naruto answered uncertainly.
"You're sorry for forgetting to use your inside voice and barging into the shop like a rampaging bull, aren't you?" I told him.
"Huh? No, I-" Naruto began, confused. I cut him off with my intense stare. "You're sorry for barging in and not using your inside voice, aren't you?" I repeated again. Sakura elbowed him hard.
"Y-yes! I'm sorry! Sorry for barging in! And yelling!" Naruto stammered.
My gaze softened. "You're forgiven. Now, who are your friends?" (Of course I already knew. I'd picked up their names from the argument and easily connected them to the ones Naruto would mention in his visits.)
"This is Sakura and Sasuke, believe it!" Naruto enthusiastically introduced.
I gave my head a curious tilt. "You wouldn't be the Sakura who keeps calling Naruto an idiot, would you?"
The girl paled and stared to bluster, "I- I… Naruto!" She whirled on him in angry embarrassment.
"Ah! N-No, Kiko, that wasn't her!" Naruto exclaimed, waving his arms back and forth.
"Oh, it must have been some other Sakura." I nodded at them. Then I turned to Sasuke. "So I'm guessing you're also not the boy who calls Naruto a Loser, right?"
When Sasuke didn't answer, Naruto gulped and said, "Yeah, that's a- a different Sasuke."
I smiled and they all took a cautious step back. "Well, so long as you aren't those Sasuke and Sakura, welcome to the shop."
Yeah, however much confrontational mama bear Kiko amuses me, that's just not her character.
