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Chapter 5
December to January 1874-75
The sound of a man sobbing intruded in my sleep, waking me. I opened my eyes slowly and glanced around. I was in an unfamiliar bed made of a dark heavy mahogany. There was a window with dark burgundy drapes pulled across it. The walls were burgundy and gold wallpaper in an ornate design. There was a heavy mahogany dresser and matching nightstands next to the bed. I was completely disoriented; Erik was sitting in a chair next to me, his hands holding his bowed head, tears running down his face.
"Please don't let her die; I couldn't bear it if my angel left me. I never told her what she has come to mean to me."
"Erik." I said weakly as I tried to sit up without success. His head flew up and a look of pure joy suffused his face. He grabbed my hand and held it to his face then reached over to touch my forehead.
"Your fever broke." He said in relief and then he gathered me to him. "I almost lost you." He whispered. Then he carefully laid me back, caressing my face. He gently kissed my cheek, tears glistening in his eyes. "I must tell the children. They've been worried." He went to the door and opened it.
"Madeline. Children she's awake!" he shouted and then came back to my side gathering my small hand in his, kissing it.
"Where are we and who is Madeline?" I croaked but before he could answer, Mouse came running into the room and threw himself at me. I held his small form until Erik picked him up and put him back on the floor.
"Give her some room. She's very weak." He said gently. Mouse nodded and then turned as Sylvie hobbled into the room, crutch under her arm. She looked as if she had been crying but she gave me the biggest smile and came over to my side.
"You're going to be better? We were very worried." She said.
"Yes she is going to get better now." Erik said not taking his eyes from me.
"Children let her get some rest. Besides it is time for bed." I looked up at the unfamiliar voice as a woman about Erik's age came through the door carrying a tray. She was a little bit taller than me with red hair worn up.The children came over andgave me a kiss on the cheek, and then reluctantly left the room.
"This is Madeline, the one who rescued me from the carnival." He told me. So of course, I knew who she was.
"See if she can eat a little soup and you too." she looked at me. "He hasn't eaten or slept since he brought you here four days ago." She told me.
"Thank you Madeline. Leave us now. I'll see that she eats." His eyes searched my face.
"Very well." Then she looked at me. "Make sure he eats something as well." I nodded and she left the room. Erik propped me up with pillows and then proceeded to feed me. I weakly tried to protest but he insisted that I was too weak to eat on my own. I could only manage half a bowl and then I made him eat. I fell asleep. When I awoke, sun was streaming through the window. Erik was lying next to me, sound asleep, his arm across me possessively. The door opened and Madeline came in softly.
"Ah, you're awake. "She said softy and then looked at Erik's slumbering form. "I'm glad to see he sleeps. I was worried for him."
"How long have I been sick, and how did I get here?" I asked.
"You had beenfeverish for two days before he brought you here, and he couldn't get your fever to break. He was frantic. He sent the boy with a note begging me for my help. I had not heard from him in quite a while and when I found him…. Well I was quite surprised when I found two children and a woman with him, a woman that he cares a great deal about. He told me the whole story and begged me to get a doctor for you. We could not bring a doctor there so he brought you here. I have never seen him like this; he kept saying he couldn't lose you."
"My poor darling, I do love him so much Madeline." I said as I put my hand on his.
"Thank you for that. All he has ever needed was for someone to love him unconditionally and she could never do that. She broke his heart and his spirit. You seem to have a healing touch and seem to be good for him, I'm glad that he found you."
"He's never been anything but kind to the children and me."
"Are you hungry? I'll go get a tray." She said as I nodded. My appetite was coming back. I turned toward Erik, watching his sleeping face, so beautiful and peaceful. He mumbled in his sleep, tightening his arm around me. Madeline came and left the tray on the nightstand.
"I'll leave this here. Try and get him to eat as well." I told her I would and she left.
"Erik." I whispered and kissed the tip of his nose. He opened his eyes groggily. "Erik I'm hungry and I can't eat with you holding me like this." I teased. His hand came to my face and he propped himself up then leaned over and kissed me.
"You don't know how glad I am that you are getting better." He said as he lifted me up and propped some pillows behind me, then he got up and put the tray on my lap. This time I was able to feed myself, making sure that he ate as well. Then there were other things I needed to attend to, and I was embarrassed that I needed help.
"Now the shoe is on the other foot." He teased, but then turned serious and pulled me to him hugging me tightly. "Don't ever frighten me like that again." He whispered.
As I regained my strength and my cough slowly subsided things fell into a routine. Mid-morning the children would come in and play quietly by the fireplace. After lunch, Erik would put them through their exercises on the flute and violin and I would nap, then before supper, Erik would give the children their reading and writing lessons. I loved watching him with them; he was so patient and caring.
One morning we woke to the whisperings of two small forms standing solemnly by the bed. We sat up puzzled; after Erik had lain down the ground rules, they had strictly left our room alone.
"What is it children?" I asked. Mouse held out a card to me, which I took, and Sylvie made her way to Erik's side of the bed. She climbed up on the bed and touched her small hand to Erik's face. A look of horror crossed his face as he threw his hand up over it.
"Don't Papa Erik. We don't mind do we Mouse. We love you." Mouse crawled up on the bed as well and took Erik's hand in his. Erik sat there stunned, as was I, not at the sentiment but at the fact that she had called him Papa Erik. Erik swallowed and then took them both in his arms, hugging them. When he released them, he looked at me.
"You have given me something I never dreamed of having. A family." he said quietly. I smiled and looked down at the card the children had made. It said, "We love you Mama Jenny. Don't get sick again." I looked up quickly, tears threatening.
"Thank you children, I love you too." and gave them each a hug and a kiss. Just then, Madeline knocked on the door and came in.
"Come along children let them get dressed." They left the room and Erik got up and went to his dresser drawer and pulled something out.
"I made this for you." He held out another music box to me. This time the knob on top was a blue and black butterfly on a daisy and the box was of pine. "What is inside is something I should have given you long ago." I looked at him curiously and opened the lid. Inside was a white gold ring in a Celtic, butterfly knot pattern with an oval diamond in the center.
"Erik it's exquisite." I said as I looked at the ring. I didn't touch it at first, afraid that what I hoped it meant was false.
"You've been as my wife, it is about time I made you my wife in fact. That is if you will have me." He brushed a curl behind my ear gently and looked at me, sorrow in his eyes."I did not realize just how much you have come to mean to me until I nearly lost you. I do love you Jenny. More than you can ever know. The ring is engraved." I then picked the ring up to read what was inscribed. "For the angel of my heart. Love Erik. "I looked at him mutely, and smiling broadly, I held my hand out to him. He took my hand and the ring and slipped it on my finger. He then lifted me up and kissed me as he whirled me around.
"I love you Erik." I whispered as he sat me back down. "Shall we tell Madeline and the children now?"
"We shall tell the children that we are renewing our vows. They already think you are my wife." he said softly.
We dressed and went downstairs to the parlor. Madeline was sitting at her desk reading a letter, a single tear slid down her check.
"What is it Madeline?" Erik asked surprised and concerned that his old friend, in fact his near sister was crying.
"It is from my daughter. You know she has been living in England since her marriage. She writes to tell me that she and her husband are leaving for America. Her husband had a great opportunity and they had to leave immediately. Erik, I will never see my daughter again, she is gone from me, and…I'm losing my house as well." She put her hands to her face and began to sob. Erik stood there stiff, uncertain how to respond. I went to her and put my arms around her. She was a strong woman, not given to emotional outbursts but the loss of her only daughter was a deep blow. She allowed herself to cry for a few moments and then with a deep breath, put her tears behind her.
"Ah well, such is life. We will still have letters, even if we are a continent away and I will find someplace to live." She said putting a brave face on it. Erik looked at me and I knew what he wanted. I nodded in agreement. He came to me and held me at his side.
"Madeline, Jenny and I need to find a new place to live, preferably deep in the country away from the city. We cannot return to where we were living." Erik looked down at me and continued softly. "Jenny's health would suffer if we were to return to that cold, dark, damp place. We would be honored if you would join us in our new home, once we have one that is." Madeline looked from him to me in astonishment. I smiled.
"We would love to have you. Think of it as repayment for all you have done for Erik and myself if you must, but I count you as a dear friend and would love the company of another woman."
"Then I would be honored and pleased to accept your offer." Madeline said. "I will ask around and see if someone knows of a place available."
"There's one more thing that we must arrange for." Erik said smiling as he kissed the top of my head. "Jenny and I are to be married, but for obvious reasons it must be done discretely." Madeline looked from me to Erik and smiling nodded once, as if to say yes, as it should be.
"I know a retired clergyman who is very discrete. We just have to come up with a reason for you to be wearing a mask."
"What if we said that Erik had been injured in a fire and the mask was to hide the terrible burns?" I suggested.
"One story is as good as another as long as no one connects my face to…." Erik agreed. "Well there is a lot to be done. We best get started."
