Hey! I finally updated! Yay! Sorry it took so long, the past couple of weeks have been kinda busy. I'll try to update more frequently now that I'm back to having no life. Well I won't keep you waiting so here it goes! (oh yeah and if you don't like this chapter as much please tell me so I can try to improve on later ones. Thank you.)
Take it away Steve! …. er….. I mean Scott!
Scott: LC does not own Lost or Lord of the Rings so doesn't sue her!
"And how is it evil?" Charlie asked putting the ring on a chain and then putting it around his neck.
"Well," Locke said with a twinkle in his eye, "Gather round and I'll tell you."
Locke then sat down on a large stump that seemed to come out of no where. Charlie sat down cross-legged in front of him like a kindergartner waiting to here a story from a sad clown about how they should have listened to their imaginary friends and become a lawyer.
Suddenly all sorts of forest creatures scampered (and flew) down from where they were to hear as well. Locke looked mysteriously at his crowd before telling his tale.
"Once upon a time," he began with his audience listening intently, " there was a happy couple, they were sooooooo happy that they decided to take over the world with a magic ring, but sadly the government found out and they were exiled to a strange island with nothing but themselves, the ring, and the occasional French woman that would stop by for tea. But one day the couple got eaten by a tropical polar bear, leaving behind the evil ring. The end."
Everyone of the listeners let out a long sigh as they wiped their noses on their neighbors shoulders (Charlie used a small rabbit to wipe his noes.) Charlie then put down the snot covered rabbit and raised his hand.
"Yes Charlie?" Locke responded.
"Umm…. Was that a true story?" he asked.
Locke looked lovingly at Charlie, and patted him on the head. "Why no young man," he replied shaking his head with a happy grin, "but it makes a good story, does it not?"
"Well I guess so," Charlie said, but apparently he was the only one who thought that, because all the animals threw their acorns at Locke while screaming "LIAR!" This lasted about five minutes until they got fed up and went back to their lil' holes in the trees where they would sit around with nothing to do until they would go mad and gnaw off their limbs or get eaten by a polar bear.
"Anyways…how is it evil then?" Charlie asked.
"Well I'm not rightly sure," Locke admitted, "but I do know that it is evil, and that those "others" need it to get even more power over us, and we don't want that!"
"Aye, 'tis true," Charlie said, "well, how do you destroy it then?"
"You must cast it into the fires of Mt. Idunnowhatokallit," as Locke said this the Earth shook, and Charlie peed his pants.
"DRAT!" screamed Charlie at the top of his lungs, he used so much oxygen that he almost passed out, but he caught him self and began to cry.
"Suck it up we need to destroy this ring!" Locke commanded slapping Charlie on the head.
"Yeah good luck with that," Charlie said walking away and tossing the ring to Locke.
Locke quickly batted it back with the speed of a free falling penny thrown from the Empire State building on a not so windy day in July, thrown from a crazed pianist with a slight over bite, and an afro. Anyway…… ahem…. Charlie ended up catching it in his hand but also managing to pee his pants yet again.
"Were did that come from?" Charlie questioned himself," I only had one glass of water today." But then he remembered the drinking contest he had with him self earlier (he won of course).
"Oh….yeah," he said shaking his head and laughing a bit, " that was fun." After he was done laughing about it he remembered what Locke had done, "What were you thinking! You could have killed me!"
"Well that was somewhat of a delayed reaction," Locke observed.
"Just answer the question," Charlie replied quite annoyed.
"I CAN'T TOUCH IT!" he screamed so loud that he almost hacked up a lung.
"Why?" Charlie questioned no noticing Lockes' current situation.
Finally Locke pulled himself together, and shoved his lung down his throat and regaining his composure.
"Because," he replied exhausted, "I cannot touch it for through me it would wield a power to great and terrible to imagine."
"Alright, then I'll just find someone else to do it."
"NO! It must be you, for you have already touched the vile thing!" Locke stated.
Charlie thought about it for a moment scratching his scratchy beard. He decided that it was much better than sitting around, besides it couldn't be a life altering experience.
"Fine, I'll take the ring to Mt. Whatever," Charlie gave in.
"Mt. Idunnowhatokallit," Locke corrected, "and you can't go just yet, we first have to have council in the elven land of Riverdale."
"Whatever," Charlie sighed, "I'll just go get my stuff and…."
"Oh I've already got that," Locke said as he proceeded to pull out Charlie's bag an hand it to him with a large grin.
Charlie eyed the parcel suspiciously, it was his all right, but how did Locke get a hold of it? "And how may I ask did you come to find this?" he questioned, "I thought I had carefully thrown it in a bush."
"Well," Locke retorted, "I just happened to be in the bush you threw it in."
"I don't even want to know what you were doing in there," Charlie declared as his eye twitched once or twice.
"No… you don't," Locke said with a wink, which seemed to bother Charlie quite a bit.
"Okay…. " said Charlie erasing Lockes answers from his mind, "Let's get goin' to Riverdale!"
"No, no, no," said Locke as if he was talking to a child.
Charlie looked at him quizzically, what the heck was he talking about?
He just said that they needed to go to Riverdale! He then decided that the man must be crazy, and this whole thing was just an outbreak of his crazy craziness. Charlie felt kind of sorry for him, he would have cried if he hadn't been so mad at him for making him pee his pants.
Charlie looked sympathetically at the poor old man, putting his arm around Locke and leading him towards camp.
"Come on, we need to go see Dr. Jack," when Locke tried to pull away Charlie looked at him with a sad smile, "It's gonna be alright, you'll be fine."
Locke looked strangely at his mistaken friend, he decided that this behavior must be some weird symptom of his withdraws.
"Let me go, you weirdo!" Locke yelled, as he pulled a matrix move that knocked Charlie to the muddy ground.
"Listen here, you!" he demanded pointing a finger at Charlie, "I must go to council, while you go to the Inn of the prancing French lady, where I'll catch up with you, then we'll go to Riverdale! Okay!"
"Okay," replied Charlie meekly, he thought it would be best to do what he told him, fearing the wrath of the crazy man.
Locke as if out of nowhere pulled out a rolled up piece of paper. "Here's a map to the 'Inn of the prancing French lady'," he said as he took off his hat and reached in. About 10 minutes later he found something and pulled it out, it was a small snow colored rabbit, it blinked a couple of times before letting out a cute little rabbit sneeze. "Stupid rabbit," Locke hissed, he then proceeded to send the rabbit sailing into a tree, as fast as a dime thrown from the Empire State building by a crazed violinist.
"Is it gonna be ok?" questioned Charlie, he thought the bunny was adorable and it would tear him apart inside if it had gotten hurt.
"Yeah, sure… whatever," came Locke's reassuring reply came as he pulled out of his hat a large church organ complete with an organist, who quickly ran away screaming his head off. Locke paid no attention. Finally he produced a small round shiny object. "And here's a compass to help you," he sighed, whipping the sweat from his brow and handing the compass to Charlie.
Charlie looked suspiciously at the compass, turning it around with his mud caked fingers, and watching the tiny arrows move around when he moved it. He liked the arrows, they were pointy, he liked pointy things.
"So, do you know how to use a compass?" Locke asked, placing his hat firmly back on his bare head.
"Of course I know how to use a compass, what moron doesn't! Ha! Do I know how to use a compass, he says! HAHAHAHAHAAAA!" Of course he didn't know how to use a compass, he never needed one, but he wasn't about to let Locke know that.
"Good, now I'll be off," Locke stated, as he let out an ear piercing whistle. A few birds fell down dead to the solid ground below, just from the sound of it. Suddenly a magnificent white boar burst through the bushes, and stopped right beside Locke, who hastily mounted it.
"Hey, do I get one?" Charlie asked excitedly, just knowing he would say yes. Who could say 'no' to someone as cute as he.
"No," came the reply, "you get to walk, it will be good for you." With that he galloped away on his giant pig.
"Stupid Locke," Charlie grumbled, kicking the dirt below him. He could tell this trip wouldn't be too fun.
Hey I hope you guy's liked it!
Here are the replies to the reviews of chap. 2.
Katiiey: Yes I believe that Locke and Gandalf are somehow related. Yes! Insane peeps will rule the world!
Angil10: I'm glad you think it's cool!
Leaviel: Locke is like Gandalf! And you guessed right Jack will be Aragorn and Kate will be Arwen! Heeeeeeeeey can I borrow your 'black rock' being Mt. Idunnowhatokallit AKA Mt. Doom?
Eachwednesdayigetlost: Love the name, I'm glad you think it's funny!
Locke: Whadda ya mean, creepy?
Yahiko: I'm glad you like me fic! Insomnia IS good. Hey and since your name is Yahiko, this must mean that you like…… RUROUNI KENSHIN! Right? In my opinion RK is the best anime eva! But that's just me…… yes Fushigi Yugi is good…..Bye!
bookworm853: I'm sooooooooo glad you love it! I feel so happy! Thank you sooo much for your review, sorry it took me so long to update!
Kathleen Stanton: I'm glad you think it's funny! Yay!
Okay guys plz review!
