a/n - hihi i am alive and here again with an apology because life is hard and writing takes a lot of effort. enjoy this one and thank u for 9k here 33

"Go away, Deku!" Katsuki's voice echoed, bouncing off the walls of the hallway leading to her room. He'd taken to camping out there a few days after they returned and he acted as her own personal doorman. She couldn't complain, really, but it was about time for her to start letting people back in.

"Kacchan, let me in!" Midoriya yelped, the pair of voices startling Emiko from her day dream.

"Katsuki, let him in." Emiko called, laughing lightly as she heard a grumble and a pair of stomping footsteps outside her door.

"Hey, Emiko. Thanks." Midoriya grinned, stepping into her room. He padded across the room, stepping around the plethora of pillows piled high.

"Sorry about those." She smiled sheepishly, patting the corner of her bed. "You can sit here if you want."

A blush crept over his face and Emiko wished she could feel his embarrassment, and she cursed her quirk for staying hidden still. It lived in her veins, thrumming with each beat of her heart, but she couldn't use it. It faded each time she reached for it, those threads she'd grown used to feeling just outside her reach.

"So, listen, Emiko. I just wanted to come here and apologize." Midoriya stammered, avoiding her gaze. "For, well… for what happened after you and Katsuki got taken."

Why does he think he needs to apologize for that?

"I should have helped more, should've come to see you and helped get you out of a bad situation." He continued, rambling slightly and waving his hands in the air.

"Shut up."

"Huh?!"

"Shut up, Izuku." Emiko growled, allowing irritation to seep into her voice. "You don't get to blame yourself for this. So just… just shut up!"

Izuku's eyes widened slightly as her voice raised and irritation seeped in, "Have you ever stopped to consider that you are not to blame for every bad thing that happens, Izuku?" She mumbled, consciously softening her voice. "If you had've come for me, Katsuki would have been alone. He needed you more than I did, so I'm glad you guys got to him."

"But-"

"No. No buts, Izuku. You are not to blame. I promise, I hold no ill will towards you or anyone else who came to help us."

"It's my responsibility to help, though, Emiko. To… to stop him." Spite filled his voice at the last word, and Emiko laughed.

"You can say his name, Izuku. All for One. It's fine, I'm not going to drop dead if I hear it."

She wished that were true, wished with every fiber of her being that just the sound of his name didn't pierce through her chest. Wished that hearing it, again, didn't threaten to tear her to shreds. It felt like a knife in her gut, twisting.

"All… for one." He whispered, carefully scanning her face.

"And… well, it isn't just your responsibility, not really."

She paused, measuring her next words carefully. She'd known for a time that Izuku and All Might were entangled, anyone with half a brain cell could put that together. She didn't know how, or the full reasons why, but she knew. "I don't know everything, and I don't expect you to tell me - but you aren't the only one who's responsible for bringing him down. Every hero, every pro - each and every one of them has a responsibility to do that same thing. I know All Might has put a lot of pressure on you-" she paused, catching her breath. "Just know that no matter what, you have my unwavering support. I know that you have what it takes to bring him down, and I believe in you."

Her heart tightened as his eyes watered, tears pouring down his cheeks. She wanted to scream, to shout her feelings from the rooftops.

Izuku Midoriya cannot shoulder the weight of the world alone.

"You're one of the good ones, Izuku. So I've got you, no matter the circumstance."

A loud sob burst from his lips and he trembled beside her, sadness and relief washing over his face. She knew if her quirk was there, if she could use it, she could feel the sadness wash over her, though she knew she would find peace in him, too. She longed to feel it, to witness him be freed from that burden, to be completely and utterly supported. She only wished she'd been able to give him that sooner, to tell him she had his back when it had really counted.

"Deku!" Katsuki shouted, slamming open her bedroom door. "What did you say to make her cry?!"

He bolted in, grabbing Izuku by the shirt before realizing quickly that he was the one crying.

"Why are you crying, Deku?!" He growled, dropping his shirt in an instant. "What did you say to him?"

"That's a secret, Katsuki." She smiled, with a wink. "Izuku, do you mind if I have a moment alone with Katsuki?"

Izuku shook his head, wiped his eyes and stood. "Thanks, Emiko. For… everything."

"Of course, Izuku. No matter what." She smiled at him, shaking her head softly as he stepped out of her room and shut the door softly behind her.

"What do you want, red?" Katsuki questioned, grumbling under his breath.

"Sit down, Katsuki." Emiko answered, fidgeting with the blanket on her lap. "I have a few things to say, and I just want you to listen for a minute, 'kay?"

Still grumbling, Katsuki plopped onto the bed in exactly the same spot Izuku had just vacated. He seemed on edge, as though being in her space- the same space she'd spent weeks curled up and sobbing in- made him grossly uncomfortable.

"I respect you, Katsuki. You know that, right?" She began, turning her gaze out at her bedroom. Her eyes trailed over her ceramic figures, taking in the cracks and chips covering their surface. "And you know I know you've been sleeping outside of my room every night, too, right?"

He scoffed, a hint of embarrassment crossing his face, though that was quickly hidden.

"Thank you."

He sucked in a breath, shock lining his face. He must have been expecting to get scolded, to get yelled at or called names. But in truth, Emiko knew that she owed Katsuki Bakugo more than she could ever explain. Sure, he'd been cruel in the past. She'd spent weeks being irritated with him after their argument, but none of that mattered now. All that mattered was the changes she could see him making, even now.

"I know you've been blaming yourself for what happened, you know. After they took you away, I mean." She breathed deeply, forcing herself to continue. "But I need you to know, Katsuki, that I don't blame you. Not for one thing that happened."

She turned to face him, scanning her eyes over his shocked expression. "You did everything you could, Katsuki. From start to finish, you had my back. If it wasn't for you, I don't think…" she trailed off, frustrated by the tears coming to the surface.

"If you weren't there, I think things would have gone a lot worse for me. So, thank you."

Katsuki scoffed, tearing his bloodshot red eyes away from her watery blue gaze. He tried to mask his emotions, tried to tuck them away. Tried to hide them out of sight, but she saw right through him. Saw the way his hands trembled as he sat there, the way his cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

"Whatever. Not like I care!" He snarled, turning his face back towards hers.

Thunk.

Her finger connected with his forehead and he winced, narrowing his eyes at her.

"What'd you do that for?!" He growled, rubbing his palm over the red spot.

"It's just me, Katsuki. Don't put on your tough guy act." She laughed, "You've been sleeping outside of my bedroom door for weeks now, and as much as I appreciate it, I'm gonna need you to go back to your bed."

She tried to lighten the mood, tried to breathe humor into the air. Resent and fear and hatred sat heavy between them, each student plagued by the trauma they had been forced to endure.

"Tch." He clicked his tongue, no doubt embarrassed to have been caught caring for another human. "Whatever."

"You don't have to worry about me anymore, Katsuki. I can handle myself now. You can go back to sleeping in your own bed."

She pressed a hand against his shoulder, startled by the heat blaring off of his shoulder.

"Thank you. From the bottom of my heart, Katsuki."

He looked at her a moment longer, before tearing his gaze away again. "But don't you get it, Emiko? I didn't help you. I left you alone with her, and she…" he choked on his words then, tears streaming freely down his cheeks. It startled her, seeing him cry.

For so long, Emiko had seen him as unbreakable. As someone invincible. A barrier, a boundary between good and evil. He'd been a pillar - a person to look up to and strive to be like.

Katsuki Bakugou cannot shoulder the weight of the world alone.

"Hey, Katsuki." She whispered, tapping him on the shoulder. "Stop."

He didn't look at her, so she continued.

"She would have found me some other way, given the opportunity. My mother would have found a chance to torture and torment me, regardless of whether or not you were there. Besides, it isn't your responsibility to keep me safe."

He growled, finally tearing his gaze from the floor.

"But it is, Emiko. Don't you get it? I wasn't strong enough to keep you safe, and because of that, because I am weak, All Might lost. He lost, and the world lost him. It's all my fault."

Tears flowed more freely now, puddling on the floor in front of him and soaking into the thighs of his jeans.

"Would you shut up, Katsuki?!" She shouted, standing up. "You are not weak."

"You are one of the strongest and most bullheaded, stubborn people I know. You are an incredible hero - an incredible person." She began to pace, walking back and forth in front of her bed. "You didn't make All Might lose. Sure, you got kidnapped. We both did, and that's shitty. And I'm sorry you had to see what you saw, but…"

She stopped pacing, throwing her hands up into the air with an exasperated sigh, waiting for his eyes to meet with hers. "Not every bad thing that happens in the world is directly correlated to you! Why are you and Izuku so hellbent on blaming yourself?! Bad things happen! And sure, it would be great to be able to stop every single bad thing that happens, but you are only one person, Katsuki. One 16 year old kid."

She turned to face him again, placing her hands on her hips. He tried to argue, raised his hand in protest.

"Don't you fucking dare, Katsuki." She snarled, moving to flick him in the forehead again. He winced, shuffling back a few steps.

"For someone with a shitty quirk, you're pretty strong Red."

She grinned brightly at him, knowing a compliment of her strength was the highest level of compliment when it came to Katsuki Bakugo. A soft chuckle turned into a full belly laugh as Katsuki stared at her, wide eyed. His eyes once filled with grief now sparkled slightly, the softest hint of a grin brushing his lips. If she didn't think it was impossible, she'd imagine him laughing loudly beside her - laughing at all they had seen and putting their own anger behind them.

"Thanks."

He stepped towards the door, toppling over a pile of pillows in his wake.

"Can I ask you one favor before you go, Katsuki? Could you tell that icy hot bastard you're always complaining about to come up here, too?" She whispered, embarrassed. "I think he's got some listening to do, same as you."

Watching Katsuki walk from her room with his head held high lessened even more of the guilt that she'd been holding onto. If he, the most explosive person she knew, could forgive her for how she acted and move past it - she knew it was only a matter of time before everyone involved did too. Shoto, Aizawa, all of the other students who'd been put in danger trying to get to her… they were all owed something she wasn't sure she could ever repay. She'd forced heroes to risk their lives saving her, her own classmates and other students had been placed in harms way so that her mother could get her hands on her.

It didn't matter how long it took, though. She'd spend the rest of her life making up for the pain that had been caused on her behalf. SHe'd become a great hero, bring her mother and the league down and protect children just like her. Her path in life had never been more clear, and for the briefest of moments she let a grin grace her lips.

Knock knock.