Well, well, well. Look who FINALLY updated. Thanks for all the encouraging comments, they really got my ass in gear. I'm not going to pretend I know when I can update next, but hopefully it won't be as long. As for if Blue is going to be Saitama's son, well you'll see~
Chapter Nine:
"That was terrifying," Executive Kaito said.
All of the executives convened in the semicircular meeting room they had used earlier. While the heroes were eating dinner, some hours after the battles had taken place, the board members convened to talk about Saitama. If they could be called battles. More like embarrassments on the part of the S Class.
Sitch sighed at the murmurings of agreement that rose from the board members. "I admit, I wasn't fully prepared to witness such an extreme display of power. But we must not forget why we are here. What should we do with Saitama?"
"He's clearly shown himself to be the most capable hero, I say we make it official," Jiro exclaimed. Others voiced their agreements, muttering with one another about Saitama's capabilities.
"I disagree," Sekingar spoke out. "I think we should obey Mr. Saitama's wishes and leave him where he is."
"Why? He's proven himself strong enough to be in the S-Class, perhaps even beyond," Kaito argued.
"So why wasn't he put there in the first place?" Sekingar asked. A moment of silence before he continued. "Saitama scored 41 out of 50 points on the written exam. A good score no doubt, but not enough to get into the S-Class like his disciple, Genos."
"I think we can overlook that in his case," Jiro interrupted.
"Please, let me finish. Saitama has been rapidly rising the ranks, and has already garnered a lot of attention to himself. Many are calling him a fraud, claiming he has some blackmail on someone or is cheating to rise the ranks. If we were to put him in the S-Class right now, especially Rank 1, it would only serve to validate this for most. He would be wildly unpopular, the most hated hero in our system. I believe it would be best to allow him to rise the ranks naturally. Eventually the public will recognize his strength."
"I must agree with Sekingar," Sitch said. "Rankings are based on more than just raw power. There's also popularity and how much donations they bring to the Association. And now that I've met the man, do you really think he'd be the best person to represent the Hero Association? I mean, if we do say he's Blast, that's the only thing anyone will talk about for months. He'll be expected to go on interviews and talk shows, and he doesn't strike me as someone who's good at PR."
"Alright, but if we leave him in A-Class, we can't treat him as one. He's far too valuable to simply only be alerted to Tiger and Wolf level threats," Kaito spoke up.
"Hmm. Perhaps we could issue him an S-Class communicator and keep it off the books," Sekingar said.
"Indeed. Although it may prove unnecessary. Mr. Saitama has already been dealing with all levels of threats during his short time in the Hero Association. Most of the contention has been with the monster's strength," Sitch agreed.
"If we're all in agreement, we'll call this meeting adjourned."
"Hey Genos?"
"Yes Sensei?"
"Have you ever seen anything so magnificent?"
"I have seen the Great Falls of Giagra. I have explored ancient temples not seen by human eyes for generations. I can observe the birth of a star in another galaxy eons ago as the light reaches our planet. I have witnessed the strength of a god harnessed by a man. But nothing compares to this, Sensei."
The two heroes were standing in the doorway of the dining hall. When Saitama had been here for lunch, there had been some amazing food. But now, there was all of the amazing food. Rows upon rows of food bars had been prepared. Rare delicacies like eel Shirasu, Kurage, Namako, Suppon were lined up next to traditional meals such as Tempura, Sashimi, Soba, Onigiri, Yakitori, Miso Soup and more. The scents filled Saitama's nose as he inhaled deeply. He thought the day couldn't get any better after lunch and the hot springs. But it did.
A heavy hand slapped his back. Saitama looked up to see a large man in a tank top standing next to him. "Welcome to the S-Class."
Saitama smiled as the others entered the room as well. If this was the way S-Classes lived, maybe he should move up.
"Hey Genos, you want to find our seats while I grab some food for us?"
"Yes Sensei!"
Saitama wandered into the rows of delectable cuisines, grabbing a plate for him and one for Genos. As he loaded up his plate, he pondered what Genos would like. He never seemed to express a particular liking to a specific dish. Usually he cooked whatever Saitama asked for or what they had most of. He also didn't have a tongue or taste buds so that probably didn't help. Saitama shrugged, putting a little bit of everything on Genos' plate. He'd probably eat it, and if not he could give it to that dog guy.
When he was finished grabbing their food, Saitama started looking for Genos. He found him arguing with the kid from earlier.
"He's sitting at the head of the table!"
"And I will be sitting next to my Master!"
"No, you won't! Your place is over there? Didn't you see the nametag you toaster!?"
"I am sitting next to Master Saitama, and if you try to stop me I will destroy you."
"Ha! As if. My microwave has a better chance of beating me than you. Go sit in your place, microman."
Genos and the kid glared at each other. Saitama interrupted their staring contest as he approached, "Hey Genos, did you find our seats?"
"Of course Saitama, right this way," Tatsumaki said before Genos could answer.
"Sweet," Saitama said to himself, following the floating girl. Genos fumed, stomping behind him, intent on correcting the S-Class Rank 2.
Tatsumaki gestured to a chair, smiling at Saitama. Saitama nodded, saying "thanks" as he put his food down. Tatsumaki beamed at him and sat in the seat next to him. Saitama turned and handed Genos' plate to him. "Where's your chair?"
"It's over there," Tatsumaki said, pointing at a chair halfway down the table.
"Worry not Master, I will relocate my chair so I may sit next to you," Genos said, bowing.
"Ok, cool," Saitama said as Tatsumaki exclaimed, "No you will not!"
Genos glared at her. "It is not your place to dictate where I will sit. My place is next to my Master."
"Shut up about the Master-thing! We get it okay! Just take your food and go sit down!"
"No, I will sit next to Master Saitama!"
"Saitama's place is here, your spot is over there! Piss off you glorified toaster!"
"I am not a toaster!"
"Yes you are!"
"Both of you, quiet!" Saitama shouted. Both fell silent instantly. "I don't want to hear you bickering. I don't care where you sit, just figure it out. I'm grabbing some sake, if I'm going to have to listen to this shit all night, I'm gonna need it."
Saitama left, and by the time he got back, Genos was sitting across from Tatsumaki, and neither were looking too happy about it. Most of the others were sitting now, and everyone settled in for a nice dinner.
Despite how it started, it did turn out to be a good dinner. Saitama quickly forgot about his disciple's bickering as he ate the delicious food he grabbed. The flavor! He'd never had anything like this before. Oh man this was so good, the S-Class ate like this all the time? Maybe he should rank up.
Wait, Genos was already S-Class! He could just ask Genos to get this! Only, why wasn't he doing it before? Was Genos...holding out on him!?
Saitama glanced over at his disciple, who was shoveling food in his mouth mechanically and simultaneously glaring across the table. Nah. Genos wouldn't deprive him of this. Maybe he just didn't know he could ask for this. He should tell Genos to look into it when they went home.
"So, Mr. Saitama, who's the strongest being you ever fought?"
"Hm?" Saitama asked, looking up.
"Who's the strongest being you ever fought?" Tank Top Mister repeated. The rest of the S-Class stared at him expectantly.
"Hm, probably the alien I fought on the spaceship the other day," Saitama concluded, slurping another morsel into his mouth.
"Really? After all this time, the strongest being was one you fought recently?" Speedy Speed asked.
"Well, yeah," Saitama shrugged.
"How long have you been a hero, Mr. Saitama?" Kid King asked.
"Let's see, I started training when I was 23, so, uh, 26 years, probably," Saitama said.
"You must have a lot of memorable stories then," Blacklight asked.
"Memorable? Oh yeah, the alien conqueror guy was the strongest, but there were plenty of guys that were cool. There was this one guy that told me he achieved the secret to eternal life, and no matter how many times I punched him he'd show up unscathed while his corpse still lay on the ground. After an hour and a lot of corpses, I threw him into the sun. Haven't seen him since so I guess he wasn't that eternal. There was this big worm thingy with legs, so big it was the size of a city almost. Smashed it up real good but it ran away. Could've gone after it but there was a sale, so. Fought an actual dragon once, it breathed fire and everything. I fought a group of espers that sent me into another dimension. Never punched a hole in reality before, and man that was freaky. Never doing that again. I accidentally broke the fourth wall once. Twice. Um, I fought some lava monsters near the center of the earth. Chased a girl made out of lightning all over the continent. Had to break a couple of fingers scattered around the world to kill this demon-ghost thing once. That was annoying. Oh, a bunch of ninjas kept trying to kill me. I guess someone hired them, but when the first one failed they were honor-bound to kill me or something. So for like a year anytime I was going to the grocery store a ninja would pop up out of nowhere and attack me. Took me forever to find out where the leader was. Gave him a good talking to. Man it felt good though. Let's see, those are probably the most interesting ones I can think of right now."
"Wait, you were responsible for defeating the Ninja Leader?" Speedy asked.
"Who?"
"The strongest ninja to ever exist. He was said to live for centuries by consuming the body parts of others. He founded the ninja village I was raised in and ultimately destroyed. He was responsible for thousands of assassinations during his lifetime, and created an empire of villainy unmatched in the underground community until I destroyed much of it. All we were told about his defeat was that a monstrous man with the strength and speed of a thousand suns challenged him to a duel. It was said that their battle leveled mountains and felled cities, and entire oceans shook from the force of their collisions. But the ninja leader was beaten within an inch of his life and fell into a coma. And even though he was unconscious, he has been known to lash out and steal the organs of others straight from their bodies. Where he was being kept, I never found out, but the strongest members of the ninja village were responsible for his safety as he recovered. And that when he did, he would return to fell the man who beat him and rule the world once more," Speedy Speed stated.
"I mean, I wouldn't go that far," Saitama said. "He had some cool looking swords, and we ran around for a little while, and we destroyed one small town, not cities. Oh man, I hope he doesn't sue me. Hey Genos, how expensive are comas?"
"Keeping someone in a comatose state alive in ICU care is about 67754.70 yen per day. For 15 years it would cost 370,956,982.50 yen," Genos reported.
"What the shit!?" Saitama yelled.
"Worry not, if the ninja leader does recover, the only reimbursement he will look for is your head," Speedy said darkly.
"Phew. I thought I was in serious trouble there for a second," Saitama said, breathing a sigh of relief.
"That man is not one to be taken lightly. Even you would have difficulty beating him a second time," Speedy Speed said in a low voice.
"Hmph. Unlikely. Maybe you haven't been listening but Saitama's dealt with a lot worse than your overrated mentor," Tatsumaki snarked.
"Careful how you speak, girl," Speedy snapped.
"Or what?" Tatsumaki laughed.
"I have killed men for lesser offenses, and their corpses have never been found," Speedy said darkly.
"Oooh, scary," Tatsumaki mocked. "Big man with a pointy stick. I better sleep with my eyes open. Boy, I could create earthquakes on the other side of the continent as a child. You are nothing to me."
"I have trained for years and I have killed the deadliest assassins on the planet. I destroyed the village that raised me and trained me, I proved myself to be the best among them, and I slaughtered them. I razed that place to the ground and left nothing but dead men in my wake. Men who have killed hundreds single handedly fell in a single stroke of my blade. I am the best of the best, superior to all others who came before me. I will end you," Speedy retorted.
"O-kay," Bang interrupted loudly. "That's lovely. Why don't we move on to a nicer subject, eh? Tell me, Saitama-boy, did you receive any kind of formal training, or are you self-taught?"
"Nah, I just punch whatever comes my way. And don't you try that sales pitch again old man, I'm not joining your dojo," Saitama asserted.
Bang smiled coyly and raised his hands in surrender. "Guilty as charged. However, wildly punching whatever comes at you may cause more collateral damage than you anticipate."
Saitama thought for a second, remembering all the damaged buildings and city blocks that were destroyed by him or a fight. "I try to keep it to a minimum."
"I'm sure you try, but with strength such as yours I'm sure collateral damage is inevitable. Tornado here has had the same issue, she causes a lot of damage whenever she does battle a monster," Bang commented.
"Hey! While you were all out being useless, I was actually killing things, so don't you talk about collateral damage while the monsters you fail to exterminate go around killing people!" Tatsumaki yelled.
"I'm not admonishing you, Tornado, I'm merely giving an observation. Collateral damage comes with the job. Perhaps it would be beneficial for the both of you to work together and watch how the other causes this kind of damage so you can learn how to best minimize it in your own work," Bang said.
Tatsumaki narrowed her eyes as she turned towards the old man. What did he think he was doing? Tatsumaki saw past the innocent smile he wore and his unassuming posture. His eyes twinkled with devious intent. What was his game here?
"I already got Genos, I don't need another person tagging along everywhere I go," Saitama stated.
"What, you think I'm not as good as your roomba!?" Tatsumaki shouted. Why did his words make her heart clench? "I'm way better than him! I could kill circles around him!"
"My cybernetics has one of the most advanced arsenals on the planet. I doubt you could keep up with me," Genos glared.
"Keep dreaming Keurig," Tatsumaki snarled.
"I think we've had enough sparring for one day, why don't we all take a deep breath and calm down," Bang said.
"Don't tell me to calm down!" Tatsumaki shrieked, the room starting to shake. "I don't know what you want, but you better stop, you sneaky, conniving, scheming old-"
"Tats," Saitama interrupted, immediately ending her rant. "We're strong, we can defend ourselves. That's why you can't work with me. You're needed to protect those who can't. We can't have the two strongest heroes lumped together. It's better to be evenly distributed to take down as many monsters as quickly as possible."
"I understand Saitama-kun," she said in a small voice. Again, he rejects her. She's not good enough to be by his side. She could feel the tears welling up in her eyes. No! She would not cry in front of Saitama. She had to be strong, like him. She would prove her worth.
Bang glared at Saitama before speaking up again. "I suppose you're right. How did you get to be so powerful anyway?"
"Oh, I-"
"Sensei! May I pour you a glass of sake!" Genos shouted at the top of his robotic lungs.
"Yeesh, uh I already have a glass, thanks," Saitama replied, sticking a pinky in his ear.
"Then I shall top you off!" Genos exclaimed, grabbing the bottle of sake. He began to pour it into Saitama's glass over the protest of the bald man. Suddenly, he not-so-subtly jerked his arm, spilling the bottle right onto Saitama's lap.
"Dude! What the hell! Do you know how long it's gonna take to get the smell out of my suit now!?" Saitama shouted.
"My apologies, Sensei!" Genos shouted, grabbing napkins and vigorously wiping down the rubber suit. Saitama waved him off, mumbling to himself about soap and change.
"You know, you could probably ask the Hero Association to make you a new suit. Plenty of heroes do it, even the C-Class," a pale guy in a trenchcoat said. What was his name again? Corpsy?
"Nah, I like this one. Though it would be nice to have an extra. Kinda gets annoying washing it every night," Saitama mused.
"Where did you get the idea for such a ridiculous design anyway?" Kid King wondered.
"It was a gift," Saitama stated vaguely.
"Take it from me, the Hero Association has some top notch stuff. They made my special bat here," Metal Bat said, brandishing his weapon.
"And my guns," Corpsy added.
"How bout the axe?" Saitama asked.
"No. That's mine," Corpsy declared.
The conversation died down as the heroes devoured their food. Pig God had his own buffet table across from the rest of the S-Class, with almost as much food as all the other heroes combined. Saitama couldn't help but sneak glances at the mountain of a man, inhaling entire chickens and steaks whole. If he had that kind of power, he could win every food eating competition. Tank Top Mister, Blacklight and Super Purple Prisoner (he wasn't sure where that name had come from, the guy didn't even wear any purple) ate a lot as well, way more than the average person, although their meals mostly consisted of meat and vegetables, no greasy foods or desserts. Shame. They were missing out. These Matcha Swiss Rolls were amazing.
Tatsumaki ate the least. She picked at her plate with her chopsticks, toying with her rice. Every once in a while she would take a sip from her tea, swirling the cup and staring into the liquid. Although he supposed she didn't need to eat all that much due to her stature, it was a bit concerning that she wasn't eating.
"Here, have some natto," Saitama offered, dumping some of his onto her plate. "It'll help you grow."
Someone dropped their chopsticks. Saitama set his plate back down and continued to eat, not noticing Tatsumaki's reddening face. She flew out of the room with a burst of wind that rocked the table.
"Where'd she go?" Saitama wondered when he finally noticed she was gone. Bang just shook his head in disappointment. The others looked at him like he was insane. "What?"
"You're a weird guy, Saitama," said the guy in the dog suit.
Bofoi stood in the shadows as the S-Class and Saitama were gathered around a large bonfire, with the notable exception of Tatsumaki. The dancing flames glittered on the surface of the pond as the tiny waves rippled onto shore. Bofoi could see the silhouetted figures of the S-Class gathered around the bald man.
He understood their fascination. He couldn't deny sharing similar ideas about him. The man was a walking paradox. The strength of a god confined to the fists of a mortal. His strength was overwhelming. But more than that, he had the presence of deity about him. It wasn't immediately obvious, but something about the man drew you to him. Bofoi wasn't one to give much credence to auras and the nonsense some ESPers preached about. But despite all the odd characters surrounding him, Saitama stood out. Maybe it was the sheer audacity to act so uninterested surrounded by the world's most powerful people. Perhaps that was what made him so frightening.
Today had been an eye opener. Before he could only guess how strong this man was. Take numbers and samples with incomplete data. But seeing him take on the S-Class and not even break a sweat–it was terrifying. How utterly outclassed they were. Metal Bat's words had not fallen on deaf ears, and Bofoi began to wonder: what would happen if Saitama turned against the Hero Association? Not take over the world, the man didn't have the ambition for it. But if someone told him about all the rotten deeds and shady dealings many of the higher ups, including some here today, did? What would he do with that information? If he decided that the Hero Association was too corrupt, would he take it upon himself to bring it down? Would his moral compass lead to the downfall of the Hero Association?
"I like him," a voice purred next to him. It took all the engineering composure Bofoi could muster not to jump at Amai Mask's voice.
"He's an enigma," Bofoi agreed, his heart still racing.
"He's strong. Strong willed too. I can sense it. Yet compassionate. A gentle hand, yet firm when dealing out justice," Amai Mask mused.
"'Gentle' isn't the first word that comes to mind," Bofoi muttered, glaring darkly at the bald man.
"Come now, even you must realize how much restraint he showed today, if that image you showed us today has any merit," Amai Mask said. "To split the heavens with a single punch, yet allow his comrades to walk away unscathed–mostly–demonstrates precision. Bang certainly appreciates his control."
Indeed, the old martial artist displayed a unique interest in the bald man. Not simply the fascination with his strength and character, but a deeper, almost grandfatherly care for the caped hero. It was almost as if the eldest hero had his own plans for the bald man.
"I must admit that he does show an astounding amount of control for someone that seems so dull. I must say, he is not what I was expecting," Bofoi conceded.
"Yes, his physical appearance could use a bit of a touch up. His costume is horrendous and he should smile more. His expression doesn't exactly inspire confidence. But when he stared down Metal Bat in the conference room, he looked truly threatening. Perhaps his glare could become his equivalent of the King Engine," Amai Mask wondered.
"Don't tell me…you mean to make him the face of the Hero Association, don't you," Bofoi guessed.
Amai Mask's smile was sharklike. "Of course. He should be already anyway. As the inspiration for its creation and its strongest member, it's only rational that he be the Hero Association's symbol of justice. He shows great potential already. He just needs someone who can introduce him to the public and someone to keep him in the limelight."
"I'm not sure that's a good idea. We have no idea what the limits of his strength really are. Should the Hero Association be accountable for his actions? What if he does more harm than good? Besides, weren't you against it in the first place?" Bofoi wondered.
"Yes, by removing Saitama from the light we would perhaps gain some advantages. But now that I have had time to consider, I think the benefits to bringing him into the light would be far superior to any slim strategic supremacy we could achieve. Once we prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that his strength is genuine and we put this whole silly debate behind us, Saitama can become a beautiful symbol of justice. I will allow him into the S-Class and once he ranks high enough and his public opinion is overwhelmingly positive, we will reveal his true identity and he will forever be the symbol of justice," Amai Mask declared, eyes shining with yellow light.
"A romantic idea to be sure, but I'm more pragmatic. Saitama does not seem all that interested in the attention. Could you even convince him to go along with this scheme of yours? Or what if the fame and power gets to his head? Or worse, he rejects your philosophies and does something drastic? You know not everyone can be a hero," Bofoi questioned, giving Amai Mask a pointed look.
"My friend, this association was built on the idea of heroes," Amai Mask countered. "The simple faith that if evil reared its ugly head then heroes would rise up to destroy it. Those who answered the call and put their life on the line to administer justice, they cannot be swayed by such trivial matters. Even if Saitama does not agree with…my philosophy, I will make sure he recognizes its merit."
Bofoi considered his words. Indeed, the necessity of the Hero Association was becoming increasingly apparent as the number of monsters continued to rise. If Saitama had not met Agoni's grandson on that fateful day, who knows what the fate of the world today would be? How many millions more would have died? If nothing else, Saitama had to understand that the Hero Association was essential for humanity's survival.
Bofoi released a sigh, his shoulders slackening. He had a failsafe. "Very well, Sweet Mask. What is your game?"
The blue haired man's smirk was predatory.
