Chapter Eleven:

Hey y'all, it's been a minute. Can I just say I am so glad I didn't even try to incorporate God and the cubes into this story, cause I never would of predicted this shit. Personally, I think I might have liked it better if God didn't give Garou powers, and he just got up on his own, but this is still cool. And it was foreshadowed and all, but still. I liked Garou in the webcomics, because he was unique in his martial arts. Sure, he's strong, but fucking everyone's strong so what? He managed to impress Saitama with his martial arts, something that has not happened in the manga. The best we got was Saitama being like, "oh is this martial arts. Funky" and thats it. Anyways enough ranting.

I wanted to give a quick shoutout to some of the peeps that have been around for a while. BingeReader, I always love reading your comments, you're awesome. Reinhardt53, you're a madlad. Flashyyyyyyy, you're hilarious, keep it up. TigerTrainerXD, thanks for the feedback, appreciate the info, I'm trying to be better. Goldiman, your enthuisiasm is contagious. To everyone else, thank you all for reading and your patience, I'm gonna try to update more often I swear.

The field was silent. The birds did not chirp and the wind dared not blow. And it was not a tranquil silence either. Not one of the S-Class, widely regarded as the most powerful beings on the planet, knew how to respond. How could they when the two strongest beings on the planet were about to collide?

"Sure, what's up?" Saitama asked nonchalantly, trying, and failing, to balance a spinning volleyball on his finger.

"Come with me," King commanded, turning and striding away from the court. The echoes of the King Engine slowly faded as he receded.

"Alright, here Genos, don't start the next game without me!" Saitama called, jogging after the scarred hero.

Saitama quickly caught up to the scarred man. They walked in silence for a bit, the only sound being the faint pounding of the guy's heart. Weird that it could do that. Hopefully that was healthy.

When the man started leading him away from the resort, Saitama's spirits fell. Was this guy really gonna ask him to fight? Hadn't they all gotten over it already? He's already kicked enough asses for one vacation, why couldn't they just let him relax?

Finally, they stopped. They weren't that far from the resort, he could still see the fire pits and the edge of the buffet. Oh man, if this guy really does wanna fight he's gotta make sure they don't damage this place. It was nice, Saitama rarely gets to go to places this fancy. And it'd probably cost a lot.

The dude still wasn't facing him. Suddenly he took in a huge breath. Saitama readied himself to take all the damage so it wouldn't break anything.

"I'm so sorry!" the guy wailed, turning to face him. Saitama blinked. That wasn't what he was expecting.

"I never meant for it to go so far! They just showed up out of nowhere and said that they were giving me a position in the S-Class! I tried to tell them they had the wrong guy but they wouldn't listen! I didn't know they were talking about what you were doing! And then I met Silverfang and Darkshine and Atomic Samurai and they all said I was strong and I couldn't lie to them because they're the strongest heroes and they'd kill me! I should've told them I'm not strong but I was too scared! And now monsters keep showing up and I can't fight them! I'm just some guy! You saved my life three years ago and I've been stealing the credit for your work and I'm so sorry!" King cried, fat tears streaming down his face as he sobbed.

"Whoa, slow down. So you're not gonna try and fight me?" Saitama asked.

"No way! I can't fight you!" King gasped, horrified.

"Phew, I really don't feel like fighting anyone at the moment. I was worried I was gonna have to protect the resort too, I'd go broke before I could pay off the damages," Saitama sighed in relief.

"Buh-wah? So you're not mad that I've been stealing the credit for all your hero work?" King asked, wiping tears from his eyes.

"Nah, not really. Keep doing for all I care. Wait, but if they found out that you were taking credit, then that's another reason they'd try and put me in the stupid S-Class!" Saitama exclaimed, a horrified look in his eye. "Dude! No one can find out!"

"What? I can't keep taking credit for your work! I can't keep up with this stress! I'm constantly terrified some monsters are going to pop up and kill me! I can't keep doing this!" King cried.

"Well I don't want the credit! Just keep it!" Saitama argued.

"No way dude! I'm no hero! I couldn't fight a normal guy!" King exclaimed.

"So what? Just keep doing what you've been doing. That's probably been working, right?" Saitama asked.

"I mean, kinda. Usually they either get scared and don't want to fight me or another hero shows up and I can pass the fight off to them, but I can't fight on my own! My luck can't last forever! I'm gonna end up as a smear on some monster's foot!" King squawked.

"You'll be fine," Saitama dismissed. "Somehow you've made it this far. And your heart's loud, just use it to scare people."

"That's not gonna work! There are monsters that actually want to fight me! My heartbeat will only excite them! They'll kill me!" King cried.

"God, you're so dramatic. So, uh, does anyone else know? That you're weak?" Saitama asked.

"No, no one does," King answered.

Saitama groaned. "Okay, this better not become annoying. Alright, so I've got an idea. If you beat me in something, I'll keep your secret. If I win, you have to come clean. Sound fair?"

"Sure," King agreed, silently pleading please don't be a fight please don't be a fight oh god he's gonna murder me.

"You any good at video games?" Saitama asked.

King exhaled deeply. "Yeah, I'm alright."

"Bring any with you?"

"I've got a couple back in my room."

"Sweet. Which ones?" Saitama asked, turning to head back towards the resort. As they walked, they argued over which game they should play. By the time they reached King's room, it was practically a shouting match.

"I'm telling you, Immoral's mechanics are absolute garbage. The characters aren't balanced at all and there's some stupid combos that are hard to get out of," King argued.

"Yeah well it's not like Lethal Konflict is any better. I've been following the franchise for fifteen years and there's been no development in the characters, it's just button mashing," Saitama complained.

"Well clearly you haven't been playing the game right," King rebuked as he opened his door.

"Oh yeah we'll see about that," Saitama growled.

"Is that a challenge?" King asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"You bet your ass it is!" Saitama declared.

"Alright you're on," King said, opening a small duffel bag, revealing several games neatly packed in. "Now, where is it? Hm, what's this? Hey Saitama, come here."

"What's this?" Saitama inspected the game King handed to him. " 'A Hero Nobody Knows.' I've never heard of this game. Is it any good?"

"I dunno, I haven't had the chance to play yet," King answered.

"Wanna try it?" Saitama wondered.

"Maybe later, it might be unfair since neither of us know the controls. Come on, the game's booting up," King said.

Saitama put the strange game down and joined King. "Tch, Cassie? Please, this'll be easy. That little girl's got nothing on my Raiden," Saitama boasted.

"We'll see," King said cryptically as the timer started counting down.

3!

2!

1!

Go!

K.O.!

"What!" Saitama shouted. "That was like four seconds! How'd you even-no way! You cheated! I want a rematch!"

"Nuh-uh, we had a deal," King said, smirking.

"I wasn't ready! One more, just one more game," Saitama pleaded.

"Ok, fine. One more. But that's it," King said.

"You got it. I'm so gonna beat your ass," Saitama declared, shuffling to focus on the screen.

3!

2!

1!

Go!

K.O.!

"Fuck!"

"Ha! Too easy."

"You've got to be cheating! That's impossible!"

"Or you're just bad."

"Fuck off!"

"Nope. You've got to keep my secret now, understand?"

"Yeah, yeah. I'll keep your dumb secret. I want to try again."

"Later. You left Tatsumaki waiting, and I don't really fancy having a view of the stars tonight."

"She's a big girl, she won't do anything like that. Now, I wanna play my video games!"

"I'll play with you later. Now let's get out there," King said, standing up and turning the TV off.

Saitama sighed. "Fine, I'm coming."

When the duo arrived, they were treated with the odd sight of everyone getting along. Tatsumaki wasn't yelling at anyone, Genos wasn't threatening anyone, and Metal Bat wasn't trying to pick a fight with anyone. Instead, Atomic Samurai was calmly cleaning his blade while Bang, Zombieman, and Flashy Flash held a non-argument conversation. Metal Bat was flipping his bat in one hand while Genos and Tatsumaki were pointedly ignoring each other. Somehow they managed to go fifteen minutes without erupting into chaos. Weird.

Even King seemed surprised by the fact no one was fighting, but he hid it well.

"Yo, y'all ready to get beat?" Saitama called out. The odd gaggle of people turned at the sound of his voice.

"Sensei!" Genos immediately responded, earning a glare from Tatsumaki. "How was your meeting with King?"

"Unexpected," Saitama answered vaguely.

"Did you do battle?"

"No, that would be immature."

"I see, thank you for helping me realize that we as heroes should not waste time sparring with other heroes, and should instead focus on gaining personal power! Wasting time in frivolous combat against your allies only serves to weaken us both, when there is still evil in the world to be eradicated! I apologize for allowing the foolish S-Class spar with you, I see now that it was a pointless endeavor!"

"Eh, no problem, I guess."

"What did you do instead, if I may be so bold?"

"We just talked, had a conversation like two rational adults."

"What did you converse about?"

"Nunya business."

"Sorry Master!"

"Stop calling me Master."

"Yes Sensei!"

"Ugh. So we're gonna play or what?"

"I think I'll take my leave," King said.

"Alright, see ya," Saitama responded. "Everybody else still in?"

A chorus of agreements answered him. They broke into teams and got onto their own sides of the court. Metal Bat, Genos and Tatsumaki were on his team, while Bang, Corpsy, Speedy and the sword-guy (shit what was his name again?) were on the other team.

"Alright, our serve, 0-0," Saitama called, serving the ball to the other court. Speed returned the ball, only for Metal Bat to spike it down, slamming the ball into the sand.

"Booyah! That's how we play!" Metal Bat cheered.

"You idiot! I was going to get that!" Tatsumaki shouted.

"Yeah well fuck you," Metal Bat said.

"You would, wouldn't you, you pervert!" Tatsumaki shouted.

"Nah, I'm into more mature women," Metal Bat replied.

"Are you saying I'm not mature!?" Tatsumaki shrieked, breaking a nearby tree. Not that anyone noticed.

"Yeah you heard me brat," Metal Bat retorted. "Want me to say it again?"

"Guys!" Saitama yelled, causing both of them to flinch. "Shut up!"

"Sorry," both mumbled.

The ball was served again, the opposing team scoring a point. And so it went, a back and forth game of volleyball like no one's ever seen before. Saitama's team all competed to get the ball first, shoving each other out of the way to ensure victory. Even Genos got caught up in the madness, nearly starting a fight with the short ESPer several times. However, when one of them did manage to get the ball, they hit it with such power that it was difficult for the opposing team to react to. Bang's team quickly adapted to each other's movements and were soon able to form a cohesive unit. Speed was the last to get on board, also competing for the ball at times, but still managed to figure out how to work with his team. And so it went, teamwork vs power, in a glorious display of volleyball prowess that should never, ever be replicated.

It ended as one would expect it to. Despite Saitama's team of powerhouses whacking the poor ball as hard as they could and scoring a ton, Bang's efficient defense and their teamwork allowed them to pull ahead.

"Dammit!" Tatsumaki, Genos and Metal Bat shouted in sync as the ball hit the sand for the final time, signifying their defeat.

"Wow, I'm impressed this thing survived," Saitama said as he picked up the ball. The moment he did though, it deflated, revealing dozens of scorch marks, tears and dents on the ball. "Oh."

"I'm going to go shower. I despise all this sweat," Corpsy complained.

"Don't you have to wash blood out of your clothes all the time though?" the samurai asked.

"Yeah, but blood I can deal with. Sweat's gross," Corpsy replied.

"Sensei, I must reactivate several of my functions. Doing so will trigger a reboot of my systems to ensure everything is functioning appropriately. This should take approximately two hours," Genos said.

"Yeah sure, go for it," Saitama said.

As Genos left, the others started leaving as well. Bang challenged Metal Bat to a golf-off, whatever that meant. Speedy slunk off to meditate or something, and Saitama wasn't exactly sure what happened to the samurai-looking fella. Soon it was just Saitama and Tatsumaki.

"Hopefully, they won't charge for this," Saitama muttered, still holding the ball. "Maybe I could hide it. They can't make me pay for something they can't prove I did."

"The Hero Association's paying for this whole trip," Tatsumaki told him. "They won't make you pay for anything."

"Seriously?" Saitama asked, shooting her a goofy smile. Tatsumaki's heart fluttered and she couldn't resist smiling back. "That's awesome. As long as they don't take it out of my salary."

Tatsumaki laughed. "Is the only thing you care about money?"

"Oi! Not everyone can afford to live in high-rise suites," Saitama said. "Anyways, I'm hungry. Wanna see what the buffet has?"

"Yes!" Tatsumaki exclaimed, suddenly leaving the surrounding trees barren. Then she coughed. "Ehem. I mean, yeah, sure, whatever."

"Sweetness," Saitama said, heading towards the buffet, the tiny ESPer tailing him.

As they traveled, Tatsumaki tried to think of something to say. Goddamnit, she's been waiting eighteen years to see him again and now she can't even think of a single thing to say! What was wrong with her?

What did normal people talk about? Their jobs? He was probably tired of talking about killing monsters and heroing. Hobbies? Same issue. Movies or TV? She didn't watch too much TV, and rarely paid attention when she did. Sports? Again, she wasn't all that interested. Recent events? Again, they'd already talked enough about monsters and aliens. Fuck, what was she supposed to say!?

Luckily, she didn't have to figure that out.

"Alright Tats, I've been wracking my brain, and I cannot figure out where I know you from," Saitama said, startling her. "You said that you remember me, but I have no idea how. It's been bugging me."

Tatsumaki smiled, a rare sight. "It was eighteen years ago. I was ten at the time, but I haven't changed much since then. Same as you I suppose. I was locked in a cell at the time, some group of scientists were using me for experiments. I never really understood what they were trying to do there. But I had refused to participate in one of their crooked experiments, so they stuck me in a cell to punish me. Then a monster, probably some other experiment broke out and went on a rampage. I thought for sure I was going to die. I saw it kill someone, right in front of me. It looked at me, and I thought my life was over. I heard it tear off the door to my cell and a loud bang. When I looked up, I saw the sun. That was the first time I saw the sun in three years. And you were there. You saved me. You took me to your house and gave me food. You gave me a life, a home. It took you five days to track down my parents, but eventually you did, and returned me to my family."

"Huh," Saitama mused after a short pause. "Don't remember that. Anyways, I'm glad I saved you. You seem to have been doing a lot of good around here. Nice job Tats."

Tatsumaki couldn't hold back a grin and a positively warm feeling from blossoming in her chest. The sun must be really warm today.

They found the buffet quickly. Tatsumaki had a nagging suspicion that Saitama had scouted out this location so he could find it from anywhere in the resort. Maybe not, since that would take effort. Then again, it was free food.

Tatsumaki filled her plate and quickly and trotted after Saitama, sitting across from him. Saitama eyed her, then looked down at her plate. "Takoyaki, eh? Is it any good?"

"It's good," Tatsumaki replied, "But I've had better."

"Hm. There's this restaurant in K-City that's got the best takoyaki," Saitama told her.

"What's it called?" Tatsumaki asked.

"Hero's Family Restaurant. Kinda a tacky name. Used to be called Ichibun Donburi. It was owned by a friend of mine, Hiro, but he retired and his daughter changed the name for whatever reason. I stop by every couple months. They're doing pretty well," Saitama said.

"Sounds good. Maybe I'll have to go," Tatsumaki said, eating one of the takoyaki balls.

"You should," Saitama encouraged.

"Maybe you can show me sometime?" Tatsumaki asked.

"Sure," Saitama said, slurping his soup. Tatsumaki could barely suppress a smile.

"Do you have a phone? You didn't register a number on the HA application," Tatsumaki blurted out.

"Huh? Oh, no, never got one," Saitama said.

"Why the hell not!?" Tatsumaki yelled. Bowls on a table beside them rattled. Saitama gave her a look and she blushed, sitting back in her seat. She wasn't a child.

"Never felt like it," Saitama said simply.

"How'd you call in sick to work then? Or contact anyone else?" Tatsumaki asked.

"Never needed to call in sick. If I really needed to talk to someone, I'd just go out and find them," Saitama replied.

"Hmph. Well that's not gonna work now that you're a pro hero. If the executives here aren't total nimrods they should already be ordering you an S-Class communicator," Tatsumaki said.

"I already said that I didn't want to be an S-Class," Saitama said, features sharpening.

"N-no, of course not! But you kill Demon and Dragon level monsters, so what if there's a monster nearby that you could kill, and they needed to contact you," Tatsumaki said.

"What is demon and dragon? Wait, are there really demons from like, hell?" Saitama asked.

"Wha–you don't know? Those are disaster levels, basically saying how strong a monster is. Wolves are the weakest, barely stronger than the average guy, tigers are still wimps, demons can be fun to play with, and dragons sometimes give me a workout," Tatsumaki explained.

"Huh. Never noticed. Haven't gone up against anything in a while that I couldn't kill with one punch," Saitama said, slurping a noodle.

"Wow," Tatsumaki breathed. "I wish I was that strong."

"Nah, you shouldn't," Saitama said. "It's pretty boring."

"I mean, I can tear apart a city with my mind, and I'm still nothing compared to you," Tatsumaki said.

"Probably shouldn't cause ya' know morals and stuff but I get your point," Saitama said.

"I just don't get why you don't want to be S-Class Rank One," Tatsumaki said. "You're the strongest! You deserve to be at the top! The world needs you!"

"Tats, being a hero isn't about rank or fame. It's about doing what's right. I've always been a hero, and that's not gonna stop just cause some rich dudes put a letter and number next to my name," Saitama said.

Tatsumaki smirked. "You gave me a similar speech about courage once."

"Really? I'm not really the speechy kind of guy."

"I don't know, whenever I'm around you, you seem to have some sort of speech prepared."

Saitama snorted. "Please. Most of the time I make it up on the spot."

"Really? The first one you gave me sounded pretty well rehearsed."

"Yeah, how do you think I put up with Genos?"

Tatsumaki glowered. "I don't know how anyone can put up with that obnoxious metal prick."

"He's not so bad. A little enthusiastic, and he can be a tad odd at times, but his heart's in the right place."

"Hmph. I'm this close to putting his heart in the wrong place," Tatsumaki muttered.

"What was that?"

"Nothing! But anyways. Why not have the number one spot? Wouldn't this let you help more people? Everywhere you go, monsters will know your name and tremble in fear of you. The strongest opponents will seek you out. You could save thousands of lives just by shouting your name!" Tatsumaki pleaded, the plates on the table shaking.

"Maybe," Saitama said. "Or maybe monsters will seek me out by destroying cities. You never know."

"And you'll be around to stop them! And people will take you seriously! You won't have to deal with people thinking you're a cheater or a fraud! You'll never have to worry about anyone laughing at you or belittling you or treating you like a freak!" Tatsumaki shouted, causing several nearby table legs to break.

"Still not totally in control?" Saitama asked, quirking an eyebrow as he drank his tea.

"Huh–no wait, no I'm in control, don't worry I'm fine! I'm Fine! D-don't worry it's Okay–"

Another table collapsed, split in half down the middle. Tatsumaki was hyperventilating. She couldn't lose control, not here, not in front of him! She wasn't a monster, she couldn't be a monster. She had to be in control, she couldn't be a monster to him! A window shattered and Tatsumaki let out a little shriek. No! She was losing control, she wasn't strong enough, she was a monster

"Tats," Saitama said, breaking through her thoughts. "Look at me."

Tatsumaki complied, seeing Saitama's face through a hazy mist. "Do you want to know why I won't be the number one hero? It's because I'm not."

Before Tatsumaki could protest, Saitama cut her off with a wave. "I've been doing this gig a long time. I've made a ton of mistakes, and a lot of people died because of me. I can't save everyone. I've failed a lot of people, and it haunts me everyday. I can't do everything. I can't move things with my mind or shoot fire. I'm not a genius or master martial artist. I'm just an average guy that punches really hard."

Tatsumaki sniffled. "That's like saying Watchdog Man is normal."

Saitama smirked. "The point is, I know what I can do, and I do it well. Everyone's got a schtick, but no one can do everything."

"Well they should."

"Wouldn't that be nice. But then there'd be no need for us, would there?"

"They should fend for themselves."

"The weak are rarely weak by choice. It's the duty of the strong to help them become better."

"I've been trying, but she won't listen."

"Who?"

"No one, nevermind," Tatsumaki sighed. "Thank you."

"Anytime Tats. I knew you were in control."

"That was a really good speech."

"Oh god, I'm becoming a speechy guy," Saitama groaned, letting his head fall into his hands.

Tatsumaki laughed. "Maybe you can just talk the monsters into giving up."

"I'm supposed to be terrible at speeches, I can't even conduct a business meeting."

Tatsumaki's grin broadened. "Please tell me they made you do PR."

"I wish. Do you know how hard it is to talk about the sale of yoga mats for an hour?"

The image of Saitama sweating in a three piece suit, standing in front of a bunch of businessmen with an image of a bunch of forty year old women on yoga mats behind him was too much. Tatsumaki burst out laughing, and Saitama's look of dismay didn't help.

"Oi, you don't know what it's like to have to pitch the dumbest idea you've ever heard to a couple of jerks that hated it before you even got there," Saitama complained.

"Trust me-snrk-I know the feeling," Tatsumaki said in between laughs.

By now, both of their plates were empty. As Tatsumaki tried to stop giggling, Saitama laid back in his chair. "Man, you S-Class are lucky, getting to eat like this every day. I don't know how the all of you aren't as big as Pig God."

"We don't eat like this all the time. Just on special occasions," Tatsumaki said.

"Oh," Saitama said, straightening up again. "Drats. Well, anyway, I need a rematch with King, you want to tag along?"

Tatsumaki gasped. "A rematch? But I thought you said you didn't fight. D-did King defeat you?"

Saitama nodded. "Handily. But don't worry, I definitely got him this time."

Defeated? Saitama had been defeated? This would not stand. Tatsumaki glowered, preparing her psychic powers. If King could beat Saitama, it would take all of her power just to give Saitama an edge. But she would not allow this. Saitama did not lose.

"Let's go."